Wednesday, February 13, 2008

More Golf, Less Gophers

Obviously, I have no real comments on the Gopher game, since I'm out in Pasadena and can't watch it. The good news is, the company I work for rented out Warner Brothers studios for us tonight and plied us with free booze until midnight. The bad news is the score of that abortion of a game. All I know, is Snacks called me to say "It's the eight minute timeout and the Gophers are down 22 and we're leaving" and then Dawger called me to say "I really don't want to recap that game." Well, Dawger better recap that game or he's fired.

Looking at the boxscore, the turnovers were even, the rebounds were even, but Illinois shot 59% and the Gophers shot 33%. So much for that vaunted defense. Also nice to see Dan Coleman not show up, finishing with 5 points and 3 rebounds. Also very weird is Travis Busch played four minutes and took 3 shots. That can't possibly be a good sign. Luckily I'm way too drunk to bother writing because I have to get to bed because my asshat of a boss decided I need to be at a meeting at 7am. Thanks.

But the real good news, is we have a new PGA post from Grand Slam.


Well for all of you disappointed ass clowns who were so disappointed at me last week for not talking about Phil Mickelson's tight shirts, or how big his man breast are.....sorry to disappoint you again. Phil missed the sunday cut, therefore we will not be talking about him this week. So for you who need your weekly man breast fix, you will have to get it from your gay porn collection.

As for the golf tournament itself, did anyone else feel like they were watching the American Century Celebrity Golf Tournament at Lake Tahoe?? I mean for gods sake, all it was for the first 3 days of coverage was celebrities......Boring!!! Its like all of a sudden they got to Sunday and realized that they should maybe show some PGA tour players, hence the reason they play on the PGA Tour. But in all honestly there was alot of drama when it came to the professionals. Part way through the 4th round, Vijay Singh had a 4 shot lead until the back 9 came calling. With bogeys on the 10th, 14th, 15th, and 16th and a inward nine of 39, that is not gonna win you alot of golf tournaments when in contention on sunday afternoons. The result was a man who hasn't won on the tour in 7 years, and was playing this year on a minor-medical exemption.

Steve Lowery who was ranked #305 in the World Golf Rankings coming to the tournament received a nice little paycheck, along with a 2 year exemption on the PGA Tour, and a little trip down Magnolia LN come April (That's the Masters for you idiots who don't know) As for Vijay, a man who has seemed to really choke tournaments away in the last couple of years, continued his trend.

This week the Tour will head to legendary Riviera CC for the 2008 Northern Trust Open, formerly know as the Nissan Open. This week 17 of the top 20 players in the world will tee it up. A couple of notables will be making their first PGA tour start of the year in Sergio Garcia and Adam Scott. Although you do need to hit it a long ways at Riviera, putting is always the key to winning here.

That being said, my pick to win this week is young Hunter Mahan.

Talk to you fools next week.


Beguiled said...

Somebody get that gay a bro. Snacks, are there any existing patents for the bro? If not, there should be.

Theory said...

I prefer the "man-ssiere".

I'll say a top 10 for Mahan, but I think Sabbatini will take the win.
Mickelson will be too rattled from his blow up last Saturday, that he'll be middle of the pack this week....maybe crack the top 25.
And Vijay Singh better get off his knees 'cause he's blowin' the game.