Thursday, March 20, 2008

It's MADNESS!

11:18 - Coming to you LIVE from Joe Sensor's in Roseville! It's the best day of the year. Tomorrow is pretty sweet too, but this year I can't watch because real life is getting in the way, so screw you Friday. I'm joined here by Snacks, Joey Dorsey, Sinlinlin, and the Optimator. Also, Franchise is here at another table. That's cool. The Todd will be joining us later, already drunk.

11:20 - And away we go with Georgia/Xavier. We have Xavier -7.5. Easy money.

11:29 - Georgia up one. Do they have enough left? Probably not.

11:31 - Spartans/Temple is on. I'm very interested in this one, because I fully expect Temple to knock off Sparty, and Snacks thinks I'm an idiot. I'll tell you a secret. He's the idiot.

11:34 - Sparty looking god awful. You know what kind of sucks about watching all the games at once, somebody will make a comment about the game, and you'll have no clue which game they're referring too and you swivel your head like a white boy in the ghetto.

11:37 - Sinlinlin and Optimator keep talking about hockey. Dude, it's basketball day today. Knock that shit off.

11:39 - Now they're discussing some hockey game that had 11 total goals scored. Must have been adapted hockey, no way real hockey scores that much. Ever. The record is probably like 8.

11:45 - Snacks just checked his work email, as if he's big and important in some way. What an effin loser.

11:46 - And we have the first beer stain on a bracket, as "captain important at work" Snacks doinks off a little beer onto, what is very likely, a god awful bracket.

11:48 - Snacks guarantees the final game will be Kansas vs. Memphis, because they are the most talented teams. Completely discounting coaching, fundamentals, and well, everything other than talent. If talent was all that mattered, Rico Tucker would be the player of the year, but he's received terrible coaching. No way Memphis makes the final game. And I'm a Memphis fan. No. Way.

11:50 - So Super Mario Bros had sex with the Simpson and out came Mario Chalmers.

11:51 - Battery life is at 1 hour, 51 minutes left. And I forgot the plug in thing like an idiot.

11:54 - Georgia looking like, well, an NCAA tournament caliber team. Leading X 25-21 with 3:46 to play. Seeing as I have Xavier in the elite 8, this would be a bit of a blow to the W bracket. Would still probably beat Snake.

11:57 - Wow, Temple pretty much just fires anything up there. Getting nervous about the Temple pick, as they seem to be idiots.

11:58 - Snacks ripping Hoffarber here. Dawg, I expect you to fire back.

12:03 - Temple is the worst team ever.

12:08 - Georgia up 9 at half. I'm getting a Hoosiers vibe from them at this point. Not the crappy Indiana U team (sorry Sidler), but the movie. You know, the whole underdog thing.

12:30 - The Todd has arrived. And I still have no power cord, which means this is going to be shorter than planned. God damn it.

12:31 - The Todd pointed out if you entered the DWG bracket challenge, if you print it up and bring it to KFC you can get a Toasted Wrap Combo for $2.99. Everybody's a winner!

12:36 - Kansas is crazy good folks. If you don't at least have them in the championship game, you're probably some kind of idiot who thinks that Darren Collison isn't an ankle breaker.

12:38 - Sinlinin, a dude I've never met, may have just hooked me up with a power cord. Sweet. Now we'll get to the good ole drunken blogging, but in public!

12:43 - Possibly heading for an 0-3 start gambling on the games this year. But we did win the play-in game. I suck at gambling, and basketball knowledge in general. But at least I'm not stuck at work like you poor bastards. And they just cut away from the Temple/MSU game because it's such a blowout. God, I'm so embarrassed.

12:46 - I've just learned Snacks is a creepy pedo Chomo, as he digs Gene Simmons daughter, who is apparently like 14 or something. I'm contemplating calling the police. Oh, and all the teams I like suck. Usually my bracket does fairly well, but this is a pretty awful start. Dionte Christmas can't even find a shot against the Spartans matchup zone, and Georgia is absolutely outplaying Xavier.

12:49 - Best Sensor's moment ever: Northwestern State over Iowa with the last second three pointer. There were some Iowa fans here, and the whole place was packed, mostly rooting against Iowa. After NW State hit the three to win, the place went crazy, and the Iowa fans cried. It was sweet.

12:53 - Xavier making a run to cut it to four. Bracket may be saved.

12:55 - I forgot to mention that when we went to the Gopher/Maryland game, the Todd bought a pretzel with cheese, at the pretzel, and brought the cheese home. That's fairly odd. Also Dr. Acula en route.

1:03 - All TVs now on Xavier/Georgia. I could have watched this at home. X down 3. Come on idiots.

1:05 - Oh oh. Oh oh. Here's comes X!!

1:12 - Sinlinlin hooks me up with a power cord. Unfortunately, Mrs. Snacks is being a HUGE jerk and won't let me run the cord along the floor in case some retard trips over it and breaks his head like Tom Pohl. Still, at least I can charge it between games. Xavier not only up, but up five and might cover.

1:13 - Sinlinlin is my new favorite person. Even more than Rico Tucker. Ok, not really.

1:14 - Purdue fans starting to show up. I might have to root for Baylor now, even though I picked Purdue to win. This quite a conundrum.

1:21 - Push on Kansas/Portland State as PSU's meaningless three rims out at the buzzer. I'll take it.

1:23 - In excellent news, we actually got Kansas at -23, but Snacks is illiterate, so we win. 2-0 on the tournament thus far (play-in game included). I'm so awesome.

1:33 - X needs to cover. Up 7 with 34 seconds left, shooting free throws.

1:37 - Optimator keeps watching the random Sensor's channel tuned to hockey fights and sports bloopers instead of basketball. I can't think of a joke here.

1:37 - X covers. Need to power up computer. Will be back.

2:26 - And we're back and charged to 73%. Three things: 1. The Todd said "Gene Keady will lead Purdue to the Elite 8". 2. The Todd said, "Seriously, Snake doesn't have any clue how to use the word "too". 3. Kent State is embarrassing me.

2:31 - Snacks is "still not worried about Baylor" despite them being down 25-18 and looking like hell.

2:38 - Dawg, Bear, Snake, Klinger - start posting comments.

2:42 - Wow, what a yawner set of games. Other than Marquette/Kentucky, every game is a blowout right now. Might be time for some Golden Tees.

2:46 - I'm bored now. Recharging computer.

3:02 - Jesus, Kent State is worse than Temple. I'm a complete idiot.

3:07 - We're now discussing how Bogart has terrible skin and looks like a zombie of some kind. That's just good stuff.

3:08 - Sorry, I know this is boring, but these games are kind of a buzzkill. I'm going to assume the rest of the tournament will be awesome to make up for it.

3:09 - Funny Dr. Acula story, "So there I was getting the mail, all of a sudden my neighbor across the street runs out of his house with a beer in his hand, and says 'oh shit, they're early.' So I look to my left and see there is a realtor and two clients pulling up with their child, and I notice the neighbor has a beer in his hand - and his house is for sale. Suddenly he runs to his car and puts his beer in the cupholder and jumps in and drives off, as the clients and realtor pull in. Jesus, are you typing this? People are going to think I live in the ghetto."

3:12 - Dr. Acula also once got stitches in his chin because he can't catch a softball. True story.

3:15 - Heading to Alary's in a bit, where the Todd, "walks around with a raging boner." Looking forward to it. Although I think I've already seen him in that state with the Rickert picture.

3:19 - Curtis Terry of UNLV is Jason Terry's brother? Wow, he and Cooper Manning probably hang out and talk about how they hate their families.

3:21 - So I've heard from both Joey Dorsey and Dr. Acula that some dude in a fighting Sioux shirt and pants combo has been the only guy in the bathroom twice and has taken the middle urinal both times. I deduce from this that all Fighting Sioux fans are gay.

3:24 - Addendum: Said Sioux fan did not wash his hands.

3:34 - WWWWW is off to the head. This is The Todd taking over. This snippet is brought to you by Summer's Eve. We are live at Sensor's and I'm about 6 pints deep and almost ready to head to Alary's for some TNA before heading to the X for the big Gopher game. And holy hell, Kentucky just hit a three to pull within three of Marquette while the place goes Ape Shit. For those keeping score at home, I've got UK picked two out of my three pools, go Wildcats. Where's the shot of Ashley Judd? WWWWW is back so I'm off to get a shot. Mazeltoff!

3:39 - F'ing Marquette is doing everything they can to blow the cover, at -4.5. This isn't fun.

3:40 - There's a very obnoxious Kentucky fan here. I want to light him on fire.

3:43 - Marquette covers. Everything else is a blow out. Heading to Alary's. No live blog from there, but feel free to go to alarys.com and check out the live web cam. You may see The Todd accosting some poor wholesome females.

13 comments:

The Todd... said...

...is mobile and in route.

Joe Sensor said...

You have a best buy like 5-17 blocks away(sorry not good with blocks and perception of distance when relating to them), go buy one. I am sure you can afford it and there are only 3 games on right now.

WWWWWW said...

I'm too drunk to drive.

And/or too lazy.

J.S. said...

dollars to doughnuts its lazy, speaking of doughnuts you probably need a snack...

WWWWWW said...

Cajun wings, coming soon.

Anonymous said...

Sinlinlin here. Alary's is live and full of women The Todd can take home to Mom. Viva la WCHA!

klinger said...

how in the hell is W not gonna be there tomorrow...I figure i'm safe taking friday to drink at sensors...now i'm stuck with just snacks all day? that's okay, we can just sit around and talk about how much smarter we are than all of you.

Anonymous said...

this blog sucks more than jeff boschee

Snake said...

WWWWW are you even 50% on your bracket? You should have let snacks pick your games just like he does for gambling. Go USC....wha-wha-whaaaaa!

The Todd said...

Jesus Klinger, I never thought I'd say this but I hope you get the high five...you know, HIV...........PRICK!

WWWWWWWW, what can I say, you are my hero and I'll see you soon enough.

Anonymous said...

WWWWWWWWW, Looks like Mrs.WWWWWWW should be the new basketball Guru.

Anonymous said...

Nothing says "college basketball fan" or "March Madness," like not posting on days two and three of the tourney.

WWWWWW said...

Feel free to fire up your own blog anytime. Ass.