Monday, March 17, 2008

God Does Love Gophers Hockey!

Last nights Gopher game was one of the most exciting games I have watched in several years while also being one of the most frustrating. I have never seen a team that is so inept at scoring goals in all my life. Hopefully after this season it will be another 30 years before I have to see it again.

A special thanks to Dawger for leaving me at the bar last night by myself. It was really much more enjoyable watching the 2nd overtime with the Hispanic cooks and the table full of metro sexual Sioux fans who thought they where king shit because they just knocked off Michigan Tech in 3 games. Note to all metro sexual Sioux fans, hockey jerseys aren’t meant to be tucked into your jeans and the word "Dude" died with pinned jeans.

Alex Kangas is now the greatest goalie in the history of college hockey. If he doesn’t win the Hoby Baker the next three years they should just do away with the award. If Lucia wouldn’t have screwed him out of playing time the first half of the season Kangas most likely would have gone for the grand slam and won the Hoby all four years of his career. Kangas was so good last night that Dawger had a wet spot on his jeans after the third period.

The Gophers also now skate with Lucifer on their side. Lucia obviously sold his soul to make the NCAA tournament this year. How else can you explain all three Gophers (Barriball, White and Lucia) scoring their sixth goal of the season last night? 6-6-6! Looks like it will be foam parties for the all Gophers other than Kangas! Can the Gophers be beat with both Jesus and Lucifer on their side? I don’t know either.

One of the greatest lines ever mumbled on T.V. took place during the Gophers game last night. Incase you missed it, during the first overtime Doug Woog said "everyone in the arena is standing except for the people in wheel chairs." As soon as he said that I pictured Woog wearing Bogarts I Hate Cripples t-shirt. P.S. Real classy shirt Bogart! Get a heart you unsympathetic son of a bitch!

Final Five Preview to come later this week.


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I hate Notebooks said...

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The Todd said...

WTF is that, Notebooks?

Jesus Christ what a series. I now have an ulcer.

Also just read that Tom Pohl had surgery for his fractured skull, ouch.

Turns out I'll be getting shit my pants drunk on Thursday night but NOT flinging it on the ice after all.

Kangas, if you're reading this, I will go down you, just give me a call.

A. Kangas said...

I would prefer your mother, sister, girlfriend or just anyone 1/8th as ugly.

Bear said...

Pretty intense series, eh?

How about the defense? Not once did you worry about MSU getting a quality shot off when they skated into the zone. I've now ripped Johnson's name plate off my #4 sweater and replaced it with Bickell. Is it just me or does it seem like Fischer could be unstoppable, but he has these little brain freezes and episodes where he gets too cute with the puck, that prevent him from being completely dominant?

I almost wet myself when I heard Woog's "wheel chair" line.

P.S. Remember when "The Todd" did his less than mediocre Gopher preview, and wrote that it was going to be Frazee's time to shine because he didn't have to share the net anymore? Idiot!

The Todd said...

What can I say, I was pulling for my alcoholic compadre there.

Snake said...

Fischer should be good but he does have a touch of the corky's. I also like how he bangs every pass off the glass for 10 minutes after a mistake. I am guessing crazy Guentzel threatens to kill him after each turn over.

Not to kick the todd in the nuts after you just slapped him in the face but remember the time when Todd also said Stu(man) Bickel would also play a big part in the season. Frazee see's more ice time. Classic The Todd!

WWWWWW said...

No comments in the recap about whoever that dude was that broke his head open?

The Todd said...

Tom Pohl's fine. Just your everday skull fracture, concussion and broken nose. Minor stuff.

Yah, Bickel's got some growing up and learning to do. I'm not a great hockey mind and make up just about everything I say.