Tuesday Talkers

I know, I know, everybody hates me.  It's been almost two weeks since my last post and I have no excuses.  Sometimes when you don't write you get in the habit of not writing and sometimes that feels good.  But there is an awful lot going on in the sports world, and I have opinions on some of it, so it's time to get back in that saddle and write not very informative, unfunny filler for you to read while you wait for your favorite message board to refresh with new messages.

-  So much NBA going on.  Lebron opts out.  Carmelo opts out.  Love trade speculation.  NBA draft.  It's actually really fun.  I'll try to write this in some kind of coherent narrative, but I make no promises.

To start, I can't believe the Warriors balked at the Love trade because they didn't want to trade Klay Thompson.  I like Thompson, and he's one of the top 2-guards in the league, but a lineup of Curry/Martin/Iguodala/Love/Bogut is a definite contender, more so than what they have now.  On the flip side, I would have been ok with the Wolves getting Thompson as the center piece of a deal.  He's the #2 guy in Golden State, but would have been #1 here and who knows if he would thrive or not, but it's possible.  Plus, assuming Flip is dead set on not bottoming out, a lineup of Rubio/Thompson/Barnes (if they got him too)/Lee/Pekovic could be a playoff team, and you're giving Barnes room to sink or swim rather than be stuck in a logjam at the wing position the Warriors had.  Personally I'd prefer bottoming out and grabbing as many picks as possible, and that's why things are getting more and more interesting.

Lebron opted out of his deal today, and with him and Carmelo both on the market teams are maneuvering like crazy to either clear cap space, build a roster that would look good to either/both of them, or both which means we could see some crazy trades and picks flying around before Thursday's draft.  One good way a team could entice either of them would be to have another Top 10 player on board (or more) and that makes Kevin Love that much more attractive.  Cleveland, or at least the media, seem to think there's a realistic chance Lebron might come home, and they have the pieces to put something together with that first overall pick, Dion Waiters (who by all accounts doesn't get along with Kyrie Irving), and Tristan Thompson.  The Bulls are in the mix as well, offering Tony Snell, Taj Gibson, and the #16 and #19 in the draft.  Plus the Celtics still have one million picks they can throw at the Wolves.  I think I'd prefer the Cavs trade to get the #1, then the Celtics, and then the Bulls.  If they trade with Chicago hopefully they package 2 or 3 of those picks to get closer to the top.

Of course, it all could be for nothing since I think it's mostly likely Lebron and the other two opt out and restructure their deals to reduce the cap number and get at least one more competent player in place.  Most likely that's the plan, but it's curious they didn't announce their opt outs at the same time.  Pay attention, because Dwyane Wade is poised to lose the most money if he opts out, so if he opts in then game on.  Until then I'd assume Lebron's back to the Heat.  Carmelo I'm guessing will be a Bull.

-  Speaking of the NBA draft, let's talk about the NBA draft.  I think your steals are going to be Noah Vonleh (criminally underutilized in college, freak athlete, great post-up game and good perimeter game for his size), Julius Randle (already an NBA ready rebounder with a good enough offensive game that should develop), Adreian Payne (already has the skills to be a stretch 4 and could eventually be an elite defender), Tyler Ennis (might not end up a big time scorer, but should be an excellent point guard for a long time), Cleanthony Early (could step in and start for most teams Day 1), and Jerami Grant (2nd round steal).  Busts look like Dante Exum (top 4 pick?  Please), Aaron Gordon (has absolutely zero skill beyond athleticism), Elfrid Payton (will get abused), Zach LaVine (another athlete light on game skills), Rodney Hood (disappeared way to many times) and Mitch McGary (no clue why anybody would take him first round).

It's hard to say who I'd want the Wolves to end up with since who knows what the roster will look like by time they pick (or after), but I'd go for either of the Michigan State guys at #13.  They could end up with Early and Grant in the 2nd round and that'd make me happy.  Should be a fun draft no matter what goes down.  I might even live blog this bad boy.  That way we have more proof of how stupid I am like when I said Kawhi Leonard would be terrible or when I said Stephen Curry would be terrible or when I said Xavier Henry would be a sleeper or when I said Earl Clark could be a star.

-  Man I enjoy the hell out of the World Cup.  Every four years I completely devour it, convince myself I'm going to become a soccer guy, watch 5 minutes of EPL, and then bail until the next World Cup.  The combination of the best in the World, the nation vs. nation thing, and the gambling make this such a fun time.  This year I also got into a WC pool to make every game more interesting, but I made the mistake of picking Spain to win the whole thing so I'm likely dead.  Sadly, I'm tied for second so far too.  Stupid la roja.  Obviously Brazil and Argentina remain the two big favorites, but I like Belgium to give it a hell of a run.  Don't sleep on Mexico, either, and Colombia's been a buzz saw.

Anyway, I won't pretend to actually know enough about soccer to really analyze that tying goal in the Portugal/USA game, but man, what a gut punch.  I mean, not really because as a Minnesota sports fan I was completely expecting it, but for fans of other sports teams that probably really hurt.  The friends of mine who really know soccer tell me I should be mad at Michael Bradley, so picture me shaking my fist and looking really mad right now.  Maybe swearing a little.

-  I owe one of the longest tenured and consistent readers of this stupid blog an apology - Dawger, I'm sorry.  I'm sorry I doubted Brian Dozier and your opinion of Brian Dozier.   I said he was garbage, you said he was good, and now I am firmly down on the side of good.  You were right, I was wrong.  You're smart, I'm dumb.  You're good looking, I am not attractive.

-  Basketball futures are out for the NCAA Champion, and you may recall that I advised you to take UCONN last year when they were 40-1 and advised taking Louisville two years ago when they were 15-1.  Yeah, I'm good.  This year my first recommendation is a team that offers significant value at 25-1 (I got them at 33-1).  Let's see:

• Significant post season run, albeit not in the NCAA Tournament?  Check.
• Strong regular season results?  Check.
• Nearly every single minute back from last season?  Check.
• Impact freshman coming in with a ranking that suggests he's a program changer?  Check.
• One of the top transfers coming in who will be immediately eligible?  Check.
• Outstanding guard play?  Check.
• Elite level head coach?  Check.

Figure it out?  That's right, the SMU Mustangs.  Take a team that won 27 games, finished third in the conference, beat UCONN twice, made the NIT final and basically has everyone back and add in the nation's top ranked incoming freshman in Emmanuel Mudiay and sharp-shooting transfer wing from Xavier Justin Martin and these team definitely has the pieces.  Plenty of questions such as how Mudiay and incumbent point guard Nic Moore mesh and if they have enough size, but at 25-1 it's a no brainer.

-  Jurassic Park 4:  Jurassic World.  It's real.  God I have such a boner.

-  I'm not going to update Gopher recruiting news or anything because it's still just way too up in the air, but know that there are a lot of balls in motion right now and I think in the last couple of weeks through the next couple weeks the Gophers are getting 5-6 visits (official and unofficial) from guys who I am pretty sure Pitino would take a verbal from immediately if he could get one.  I would really love to snag and early commitment this year.  Like tomorrow.

-  I saw Carlos Gomez was on the cover of Sports Illustrated recently.  Even though it kills me to see him be this good, let me rub a little salt in the womb:

1. Gomez's average of .312 ranks 13th in the majors.
2. Gomez's OBP of .377 ranks 22nd, whilie his SLG of .525 ranks 12th.  
3. That gives him an overall OPS of .902, which ranks 18th.
4. His batting alone gives him 18.2 runs above replacement so far this year, which ranks 14th.
5. He's also fast and a good base runner, which gives him another 1.5, and his defense is superb giving him another 1.7.  After a bunch of other league and position related factors he nets out at 31.7 runs above replacement which translates to 3.4 wins above replacement, which ranks 6th in the majors.
6. Yes, Carlos Gomez has become a tremendous all around player who, according to one metric, is the 6th most valuable in baseball.  
7. After the trade for J.J. Hardy (defensible) and then the trade away of Hardy (completely indefensible) the Twins ended up with half a season of Hardy and 24.2 innings of terrible relief (1.91 WHIP and 5.47 ERA) from Jim Hoey.  Gross.

-  Seriously though, you could make a pretty good team out of ex-Twins - better than usual even:

C - Wilson Ramos (.261/.314/.370)

1B - Justin Morneau (.298/.336/.509 with 12 HRs)

2B - Nick Punto (.230/.331/.294)

3B - Danny Valencia (.236/.291/.333 - ok so this isn't the team's strength)

SS - J.J. Hardy (.294/.321/.373)

OF - Carlos Gomez (.312/.377/.525 with 12 HRs and 11 SBs)

OF - Michael Cuddyer (.317/.366/.500 with 5 HRs)

OF - Torii Hunter (.266/.290/.441 with 9 HRs)

DH - David Ortiz (.255/.354/.478 with 17 HRs)

Ok I'm getting a little tired of looking up all these stats, but your rotation would be Francisco Liriano, Matt Garza, R.A. Dickey, and Kyle Lohse with the fifth starter being Kevin Slowey unless I think of somebody else.  The bullpen would be ok with Joe Nathan as the closer and a whole mess of guys like I know Pat Neshek is kicking ass this year.  Really, I mean, that's a pretty good team. Fill the obvious holes (C, 2b, 3b, fifth starter) with current Twins and make Joe Mauer catch again and you might really have something here.  And it really doesn't matter.

-  I suppose I could live blog this Twins game, but it's already 5-3 in the top of the second which means this things going way past my bedtime.  Adios muchachos.

Week in Review - 1/18/2012

So do you think we'll hear a little bit of talk about a rematch, revenge, redemption, etc. the next couple of weeks?  Hey, at least David Tyree will probably get to be interviewed on TV again.


WHO WAS AWESOME

1. Joe Coleman.  No, I'm not actually giving all the credit to Coleman for the 3-game winning streak, but it's easy to notice that the streak started when he was put in the lineup. Coleman has an aggressiveness and a fearless streak to him that's pretty unique on this team (although I think Andre Hollins has some of it too, but just doesn't have the skill level to pull it off just yet), and it seems to be rubbing off a bit, particularly on Austin Hollins, but on pretty much the entire back court - even Maverick, although I'm not sure if that's a good thing.  I'm not sure if it was that more aggressive attitude or betting coaching by Tubby (who did, by the way, seem very engaged in the game for the first time in far too long), but when Northwestern went into that 1-3-1 I was ready for all kinds of collapse, but they handled it well.  I'm not saying they carved it up like a Thanksgiving taco buffet, but they were definitely more aggressive going into the gaps than the last several hundred years (and seriously, it's not a "trap at half court" 1-3-1, so you don't need to treat it that way).  Add in the defensive effort and this was one of the team's best games of the year.  The latest bracketology is out on ESPN.com and they currently have the Gophers in as an 11 seed.  I'm not sure they're there yet and there's plenty of work to do, but make no mistake, the Gophers are all set-up to disappoint.  Prove me wrong.  Please. 

2.  Timberwolves.  I didn't even know I missed the Timberwolves.  The wife and I watched the end of their big win against the Clippers, and when Kevin Love took that shot I put both arms in the air and when he hit it I turned to Mrs. W and said "Hell Yeah" or something similarly stupid, but the point isn't that I said something stupid, it's that I said anything at all (plus that arms in the air thing).  When is the last time I reacted to anything the T-Wolves did with anything other than laughter or indifference?  I have no idea.  I can't even remember the last time I got irritated.  Hell I can't really even remember the last time I watched an entire game and I've watched all or nearly all of three or four this year already.  I hate to jump on the Rubio bandwagon and give all the credit to one guy, but he makes them fun to watch, even in a loss, and he's made them a much better team than last year.  Even if the upside is an 8 seed an an early exit (and that might be pushing it), they're relevant, they're talked about, and they're entertaining.  What more could you ask for after the hell that team has been?

3.  Missouri Tigers.  After Saturday's win over Baylor I have now narrowed my possible National Champ pick to Kentucky or Missouri (Ohio State and Baylor are my other 2 Final Four picks right now) because that win answered every possible question I could have about the Tigers.  And really there weren't many questions, just two:  could they win against a tough team on the road (only road wins this year are Iowa State and Old Dominion with neutral court wins over Illinois, Notre Dame, and Cal) and how would they handle a team that could match there athleticism but with more size like Baylor (Ratliffe is Mizzou's only contributor over 6-6).  Just an awesome team.  And I'm trying to think of anybody else, but Phil Pressey has to be the best point guard in the country right?  I know you can get into the scoring point vs. pure point and Pressey probably isn't as good in either category as guys like Ashton Gibbs (scorer) or Kendall Marshall (pure), but combine the two and add in his elite level defense and I think he's gotta be the guy.

4.  Florida State.  Wow.  So after a last second three knocked off Duke in Cameron on Saturday, Florida State's last four games are the win at Duke, a win over Maryland, a win over North Carolina, and a win on the road at Va Tech.  All four impressive in their own way, but the win at Duke and the thrashing they gave UNC (remember they won 90-57) are two of the more impressive wins by anybody this year (although I'd give the nod to the Mizzou win referenced above).  What's even better for the Noles is that they've always been a great defensive squad (top 5 in defensive efficiency the last 3 years), but in their last few games the offense has shown up.  90 points vs. UNC?  84 vs. Maryland?  75 vs. Duke?  In all three cases that's a top 2 score against, put up by what was supposed to be a pretty crappy offense.  And since I don't really watch many FSU games I can't really pin it down, but it seems like a different Seminole is stepping up offensively in each game.  With that defense and there pretty good guards the Seminoles have March sleeper written all over them.  With a sharpie.  One of those cool glittery ones.

5.  Victor Cruz.  Yes, El Juegito finally gets a mention.  See, I'm a huge Hakeem Nicks fan, so I could easily convince myself that everything Cruz did was fluky.  Like when he burst onto the scene in Week 3 with 2 long touchdowns he only had one other catch and so obviously that was just a fluky lucky day.   Then after an 8 catch, 161 yard day he followed it up with a 2 for 12 day, so yeah, no worries, clearly just a fluke.  Then, and I'm just realizing this right now by looking at his game log, Cruz went the final 10 games of the season with at least five catches 9 times and at least 90 yards seven times with a 5-44 game in week 16 his only clunker.  He ended up 5th amongst wideouts in receptions this year and third in yards, not to mention tied for fourth in touchdowns.  Crazy.  And after his 10 catch, 152 yard game this weekend against 49ers where he was basically their only offensive weapon I'm finally ready to admit that he's pretty damn good.  He's no Hakeem Nicks, but he's a lot better than I've given him credit for.


WHO SUCKED

1.  Billy Cundiff.  So let's get this straight -  your defense manages to keep one of the best offensive teams in the league under control, your much maligned QB keeps you in the game and then, miraculously, manages to drive your team all the way down the field and into chip shot field goal range to tie the game and you shank it worse than Dobby got shanked?  It was practically an extra point and I think Cundiff missed it further to the left than how far away the spot he kicked from was.  But, I guess that's what happens when you trust a kicker from the Missouri Valley Conference, because everyone knows that other than UNI's upset of Kansas a couple of years ago the MVC has never produced anything that didn't suck.  Plus this guy was Dawger's kicker on his fantasy team, so between the curse of Dawger (which is a real thing, just ask Darren McFadden, Josh Freeman, Rodney Williams last year, or basically any Twin) and the Drake thing this guy was pretty much screwed.

2.  UCONN Huskies.  Add the Huskies to the list of team's in free fall.  The warning signs were there after UCONN lost to both Seton Hall and Rutgers earlier in the month, but since Ryan Boatright was shut down by the NCAA they beat Notre Dame, but have now lost their last two - a home game vs. Cincy and on the road at Tennessee who is terrible.  What's funny is Boatright, who I desperately wanted to be a Gopher, plays the fourth most minutes on the team while the two starting guards, Jeremy Lamb and Shabazz Napier, play the most minutes.  So basically this team is three guards + Andre Drummond and that's it (actually the rest of their guys would beat the Gophers, but you get my point).  So what do you get if you take something with four legs and chop one off?  A Def Leppard drummer, the guy who killed Indiana Jones's wife, or a really funny looking dog, that's what.

3.  New York Knicks.  Wow, what a shocker that Knicks are 6-9.  See, getting two superstars (or more) on one team is definitely a good way to build a winner in a hurry, but you can't just slap any superstars together or you end up with a broccoli and poop sandwich.  Lebron and Wade don't necessarily make sense, but Bosh does with either and those two are so good and so special it works.  If Deron Williams and Dwight Howard end up together it makes sense, and if both end up with Nowitzki it makes even more sense.  Outside of the ball-hogging, bitching, and raping Kobe and Shaq made a ton of sense.  Pierce, Allen, and KG, the first of the superteams, made sense.  But Amare and Carmelo?  No.  Chris Paul and Amare, yes.  But not this.  Two guys who need the ball at all times and are terrible defenders who also take up almost all your cap room and reduce you to using Landry Fields and Toney Douglas as your back court.  I thought the Tyson Chandler signing was genius, but not even he can save this defensive wasteland.  God the Knicks are just worthless.  The only city in America who puts NBA as their #1 sport and this is the crap they get.  It would be sad if so many New Yorkers weren't abrasive A-holes.  Or at least that's what TV has led me to believe.

4.  Michigan Wolverines.  Thanks a lot, assholes.  So all the talk about how the Big 10 is the best conference in the land and how it's not only good it's deep and that's why things like Indiana losing to the Gophers and Illinois losing to Penn State and Nebraska beating Indiana happen, and then one of the supposed better teams in the conference has a rare chance to prove how good they are in mid-season and the Wolverines lay and egg and lose to Arkansas, a bottom third SEC team with no chance at an NCAA bid.  Actually, I was starting to kind of believe the hype so really this just did me a huge favor by reminding me that outside of Ohio State and Michigan State the big 10 always sucks in the tournament so now maybe I can win the bracket pool instead of tearing my stupid bracket up by 6pm Thursday night for the 10th straight year.

5.  Northwestern Wildcats.  Pardon my french, but what the deuce was that?  I can't even decide the most perplexing part between John Shurna's suddenly inability to even come close to hitting a free throw, Luka Mirkovich only playing 10 minutes and most of it in garbage time, or why Dawger was terrified of Dave Sobolewski (as he wrote in the comments of my game preview) when they guy is some kind of cross between a ball boy and a lesbian with a game more on par with Maverick Ahanmisi than somebody anyone needs to be afraid of.  Give the Gopher defense plenty of credit because they did a great job, particularly in taking Drew Crawford basically completely out of the game, but Northwestern surely didn't do themselves any favors.  Not to mention that now gives them four losses in their last five games, and although they can't quite be counted out of getting their first ever NCAA bid, it's not looking super duper likely at this point.

Of course, all this pales in comparison to the real story of the game, which was that I was selected to do that thing where you pick between the four kinds of lotteries and then whichever one you pick has a certain amount of Gopher 5 tickets behind it and then you win them and stuff.  So they come get me at half-time right after the alumni came out there for what I swear was the 4th time this year, and bring me over down by the baseline where we sit in the second row and they tell me we're going up on the floor at the first TV timeout of the half, which is the first clock stoppage under 16 minutes.  Ok, fine.

Then, after explaining the bit, they bring over this hideous orange Gopher 5 shirt and tell me that I have to wear this because the sponsor is there and well, that's the bit.  Ok, fine.  So I look at it and it's a Large, which usually either means it will fit fine or be way too tight, depending on the brand.  Of course, this doesn't stop somebody from behind me from yelling "better get that guy a double-XL!" and when I turn around it's some old dude who had to have been at least 90, and he's giving me this big smile and so I laugh and I'm like, "good one, old dude."  So whatever, I put it on and it's super tight but I'll live.

I was at the game with Bear and Snake and they kept telling me I had to shtick it up and be funny and they kept saying that when it was my turn to talk I needed to say something like "I'll take the scratch-offs" which was ok I thought but I couldn't think of anything else until right before they called me up there I had an inspiration.  So when it was my turn and they're like, "what's your choice?", I said, "In honor of my personal hero, Luka Mirkovich, I select Northstar Cash" and then I looked over and he was looking around so he definitely heard his name.  It was awesome.

Look how loved this guy is.  And now he knows for sure who his #1 fan is.

FACT

FACT:  It was 10 years ago today Cal Ripken Jr. got his 3,000th career hit against the Twins.

FACT #2:  It was also 10 years ago that we were at that game and while everyone else was standing and applauding a great career accomplishment, Dawger was firmly planted in his seat calling everyone else a sell-out and comparing Cal Ripken to Michael Cuddyer, which also berthed one of the greatest internet cartoons ever on DWG, which I can no longer find.


I'll still have some Cobbsy talk tonight, maybe, but I wanted to give everyone the chance to celebrate this moment in history.

F the Buckeyes

That's a terrible post title, but I couldn't really think of anything else because I'm so damn tired.  Seriously, I'm exhausted.  I probably have mono.  Or AIDS.  I haven't had any gay sex lately or hugged Magic Johnson, so it's probably not AIDS. 


1.  Is Ohio State more of a "final four" team like you said, or "not a top 100" team like Dawger said?  It should be obvious at this point that any time Dawger and I disagree, you just take my side and you'll be good, and this is just another example.  Since the Gophers beat them at Williams, they have won at Purdue, vs. Wisconsin, and at Iowa and lost at #12 West Virginia by 6.  The team's RPI this year is 41, they're ranked 14th by Ken Pomeroy's numbers and 20th and 24th in the two polls, and are 12-3 when Evan Turner plays.  I'll admit "final four team" might be a little bit strong, but "not a top 100" team is just plain old ludicrously stupid.  Much like everything else that comes out of Dawger's mouth.  You can still get them at 75-1 to win the National Championship.  I recommend you throw a $5-spot on it.

2.  So just how good is this Evan Turner?  If you can get past the fact that he turns it over a ridiculous four times per game he's pretty damn good.  His 18.4 ppg ranks third in the Big Ten.  His 9.9 rebounds per game ranks first in the conference, and his 5.5 assists ranks second.  He's also tied for fourth in steals per game at 1.7 and is twelfth in blocks at 0.9 per game.  All this while shooting 55%, good for fourth in the Big Ten, and he's a guard.  The team is 12-3 with him, including wins over Purdue, Florida State, and Cal, and is just 3-3 without him with a loss to Michigan.  He might legitimately be the best player in college basketball this year, and if he hadn't gotten hurt would be a legit National Player of the Year candidate.   

3.  Tell me about the rest of guys, but be quick about it.  I don't have all day. Fellow wings David Lighty and William Buford are basically knockoffs of Turner, and both can carry the team if they need to.  Lighty scored 18 in the second-half alone this week against Iowa, and Buford played his best game of the year last weekend against West Virginia with 22 on 9-13 shooting.  Jon Diebler is the only player in the conference with more three-pointers made than Blake Hoffarber this year, shoots 44% behind the line, and has hit five or more threes in a game seven-times already (and can get his own shot).  Finally, manning the paint is Dallas Lauderdale, who is an offensive retard but leads the conference in blocked shots and is a pretty intimidating force in the middle - good thing the Gophers don't have anybody who can drive into the paint anyway.  

4.  How is the post-Al Nolen point guard thing going?  Well Justin Cobbs has been a non-factor.  He played just four minutes against Michigan State because he was way, way, way, way too freaking hyper resulting in two turnovers in those four minutes.  In the next game against Northwestern he played better, putting in 12 minutes of work and getting almost nothing on his stat line, good or bad.  I didn't notice him for his good play, but didn't notice him for bad either.  Devoe Joseph had a great game against Michigan State with 16 points and 7 assists against just 1 turnover, but kind of disappeared against NW with just six points and four turnovers.  So, in a word, pretty uneven.

I'm encouraged because both Joseph and Cobbs have shown flashes the past two games, but they'll need to play even better if there's an NCAA bid in the future.  Ohio State doesn't match up well against quick point guards because there best guys are bigger wings and their only "true" point guard is a gigantic douchebag.  I just don't know if either of our guys would be classified as a "quick" point guard.  As usual and in every game the rest of the year, point guard play is going to be a huge key.

5.  This would obviously be a huge win for the Gophers, is there any reason to believe?  Not really.  Ohio State is almost as good defensively as the Gophers, but are a far, far better offensive team - one of the best in the country (16th in offensive efficiency).  They can thrive either in the halfcourt or in an up-and-down fast-paced game and have not only the best player out of the two teams, but maybe the best two or three.  I'm hoping the Gophers can keep it close to the end and find a way to sneak a win out somehow, but I think a blowout is more likely (and not the good way).

Ohio State 74, Minnesota 62. 

   

Gopher Hockey....Its Not Very Good

It is Gopher vs. Sioux week. WWWWW has been emailing me on a regular basis to write about hockey and I figured this would be a good week to post. I will be taking in Fridays game live from Mariucci. A gopher vs. Sioux preview will follow later this week. Right now I am going to write/vent about the state of America’s favorite hockey team.

The Gophers head into this weekend with no momentum, no heart and no future for this season. There are plenty of Gopher puck apologist who keep sighting the team has won 6 of 7 heading into this weekend. I guess that means things have turned around and the program is once again heading in the right direction. Wrong! What those apologists don’t point out is the teams the Gophers have beat are the bottom feeders of D1 hockey. If the gophers have really turned the corner they would sweep a very average Sioux team this week or take 3 pts. I am not holding my breath.

Lets recap how bad things are at 4 Oak Street this season. Goldy’s only quality wins this season are against middle of the road Michigan St. and Wisconsin teams. The season has seen the team get swept at home vs. Denver (shutout both games) and Duluth, and drop home games to Bemidji, Mankato and Northern Michigan. The team also had another player leave in the middle of the season. Sophomore Sam Lofquist decided to call it a career after being benched during the Wisconsin series. Lofquist is another soft teat who played with no heart and is a huge snatch for quitting after a little adversity. I will defend his decision based on the fact he was benched in favor of Brian Schack (sorry Todd). How in the hell do you bench a kid for Schack? The Gophers also lost their top goal scoring threat, Jay Barriball, for the season thanks to a knee injury. The only good news from the injury is Barriball accepted a medical red shirt and plans to play next year.

On top of the terrible results this season the on ice product is completely unwatchable. At times this team is like watching an MLS soccer game on ice, but less scoring. Some might chalk the scoring issues up to poor talent, but I still argue talent is not the issue. The front line is loaded with kids who have scored goals their entire careers and came into the program highly rated. Once they arrive at the MN they all turn into 3rd and 4th line players? The blue line is also full of high NHL draft picks that are known for being creative puck movers. The combination should add up to fun hockey, a great power play and lots of goals. The issue isn’t talent, but development and use of said talent. This issue falls squarely on the shoulders of the coaching staff.

The main issues I see with the coaching staff are poor assistant coaches (a.k.a. John Hill), no player development, recruiting the wrong style of player, catering to 17 year old kids who have no heart, a poor locker room, and the system hockey they now play. All of these items fall squarely on the shoulders of the head coach.

Things started going down hill when Bob Motzko left the Gophers for St. Cloud. Since Motzko’s departure the high end individual talent up front stopped coming to MN. The next year Mike Guentzel was removed from the program. When Guentzel left so did all the grit and passion on the bench. We are now left with an unqualified Grant Potulny and John Hill. I do think Potulny will develop into a good coach. I just don’t think he is ready for the gopher’s bench.

John Hill on the other hand is a complete F’ing tit. The best compliment I hear about Hill is he’s a nice guy. In the coaching business there is nothing worse than "being a nice guy" as your best quality as a coach. Hill comes off as easily confused and not very inspirational. Nothing proved this point more than the look of confusion and terror on his face when he filled in as head coach at UND last year. His interviews during intermissions should be grounds enough for firing. I can’t imagine showing up to practice and having to look at and listen to this roly poly son of a bitch. Hill must go.

Two years ago we/I pounded Kyle Okposo, and his ginger hair, for leaving the team in the middle of the season. The more I think about it, the more I feel like I should apologize to Okposo. Okposo was smart enough to realize he wasn’t getting what he needed from Gophers and was actually going backwards in his development. He was bright enough and brave enough to get out before he got stuck in a rut like the rest of the current roster. Bear pointed this out to me during an email exchange late last week and I don’t think Bear has ever spoken a truer word in his life (other than when he called Dawger the worst Yahtzee player of all time). The reason players are leaving and not happy, is the lack of development. The coaching staff is chasing results by playing system hockey and not letting gets skate and develop. I am just surprised they continue to get top end talent while playing this style of puck.

The gophers have also shot themselves in the foot with their recruiting the past couple of years. Not only are the gophers taking more kids right out of high school, but they are now taking players who accelerator their high school studies so they can play college hockey as seniors in high school. The main reason this has failed is these players aren’t concerned about coming to MN and winning a national championship. They are coming to MN to improve as an individual player and move onto the pros. This leaves you with a team full of kids who only play for themselves, which leads to a split locker room, which leads to a garbage team. It also seems like the coaches cater to these players which has pissed off the older players on the team. This was a huge issue with the Phil Kessel/ Holy Cross team.

I am not about to call Lucia a bad coach. Obviously he has had great success as a college coach and turned MN into the premier hockey program in the country from 2000-2005. He also gave me the greatest gift of my life (that includes my two kids) when he led MN to the 2002 national championship. Since that time things have slowly deteriorated to the point we are at today. Which is why I think it is time for a fresh start and Lucia to move on.

I have been saying this for a couple years now, but it is time to bring in Dean Blais. He is a Gopher guy, which will make all the idiot booster who worry about that silly shit, happy. He wins every place he goes, he develops talent, and he will recruit kids with heart and won’t take any shit from prima donnas or their parents. Hiring Dean Blais will also fire up a fan base which is in a rut right now. Dean just led the USA U-20 team to a world championship victory over Canada so his hiring would give an instant jolt to the fans and program. Hopefully Maturi has the seeds to make it happen.

At least North Dakota sucks so I am able to enjoy that portion of this college hockey season.

Snacks here is a picture for you. I know you missed them you sick bastard.

Week In Review - 1/11/2010

I have a lot of words to write so let's just get to it.  No time for love, Dr. Jones.

WHO WAS AWESOME

1.  Gopher basketball.  If you are like me and consider the Purdue game not a failure and actually a pretty good effort you have to consider this a pretty good week in Gopher hoops after they spanked Ohio State 73-62.  Although I'm pretty sure I overrated Ohio State by a good margin, I also think a lot of that had to do with the Gopher defense (and the fact that there wasn't a full moon so we got more of a Scott Howard Evan Turner than a Teen Wolf Evan Turner).  I was baffled by Turner.  I have no idea if he just isn't all the way back or what, but I really wasn't impressed.  His 19-8-7 stat line looks great, but he wasn't in control of the game the way I expected and made some really poor decisions (4 turnovers) and basically just seemed completely baffled by the Gophers double-team press thing.  I thought I'd be blown away.  Instead I was disappointed.  I'm guessing it's similar to how Mrs. W felt the first time we were "together."

Anyway, I'm not here to talk about things like that, and you shouldn't be so interested, perv.  Let's talk Gopher awesomeness.  Blake continues to be completely unconscious.  At this point there literally isn't a single shot he could take that would upset me.  He could pull up from 40 feet on a 2-on-1 break and I would applaud.  I've never seen anything quite like this run he's on.  And he only needs the smallest window to get his shot off.  It's hard to not love him at this point.  Plus he's white.  Everybody loves white people.

Speaking of white people, everybody needs to get back on the Ralph Sampson bandwagon with me.  There is a huge difference when he is in there compared to Colton.  I live Colton, but he's no Ralph.  One will end up being a good center, the other is already good and could end up being a star. Join the fan club now folks, we might be all full up by season's end, and you don't want to miss out.

2.  Garrett Gilbert.  It's a horrible name, no doubt, but Gilbert looks like he might end up being a hell of a quarterback down at the U of Texas after getting thrown into his career in the most high pressure way possible.  When Colt McCoy pinched his nerve in the National Championship game and decided not to risk his NFL prospects and sold out his team by not even trying to come back in, it was up to Gilbert to do something.  He was a bit uneven, and ended up throwing four interceptions and completing just 15 of his 40 pass attempts, but there was something there.  He made some excellent throws against a very good defense, and would have had better numbers but Longhorn receivers dropped at least three balls and their running back was directly responsible for one of those picks when he decided not to hold on to a shovel pass.  Don't forget that he also managed to throw a couple of TDs and not only kept Texas in a game they shouldn't have been in but actually had a chance, however slim, to win (a chance derailed by a big time missed block).  If he can do all that as a freshman with only 27 pass attempts coming into the game, I'd look for big things from him next year.

3.  Louisiana Tech.  I've tried to avoid spotlighting these guys because I figured I was a bit too attached after watching them play Utah State in person last year and falling hard for Magnum Rolle as if I was Ben Stiller and Rolle was that one chick in that one movie, but it's probably time to point out that La Tech is dominating fools all over the place.  Ok, dominating fools is maybe a little strong considering they have a loss to Arizona on their record, but they are now 3-0 in the WAC and that includes wins over both league favorites, Nevada and Utah State, and the win over the Aggies was a 22-point massacre earlier this week, mainly thanks to Rolle.  Magnum (tell me that isn't a sweet name) dominated the white guys USU trotted out in the paint to the tune of a 22 point, 14 rebound performance and is now leading the WAC in blocked shots at 2.6 per game.  And he's not alone, guard Kyle Gibson (not the Twins' pitcher) leads the conference in scoring and wing Olu Ashaolu is third in rebounding and put up a 21-board effort earlier this year against Houston.  With that weak non-conference schedule the Bulldogs will probalby have to go pretty damn near undefeated to secure an at-large, but it's suddenly looking like it might be possible.

4.  Wisconsin.  You know what pains me?  Writing this.  But it's time we all step back from our completely justified hatred of the neanderthals who reside in the world's worst state and acknowledge not only that the team is good this year, but also that Bo Ryan might be a really good coach.  I mean, Tubby still owns Bo, but Bo might not be that bad considering this year's version of the Badgers has almost no talent but still managed to beat Purdue this weekend.  The Badgers are now 3-1 in conference play, and have two of the toughest challenges out of the way.  With wins over Maryland, Duke, Marquette, and Purdue in their pocket and a relatively easy schedule the rest of the way, it looks like the gay-ass Badgers will almost certainly be in the tournament once again.  At least Trevon Hughes is fun to watch, because none of these other guys are (and now it sounds like Leuer is hurt pretty badly, so maybe no tournament after all, but I can't bring myself to count Bo Ryan out - unless he's facing Tubby).

5.  Manabu .  First the story:

DANIA BEACH, Fla.—A man was being credited with tying the 77-year-old world record for catching the biggest largemouth bass. The International Game Fish Association announced Friday that it had confirmed the 22-pound, 4-ounce fish caught by Manabu Kurita. The Florida-based group said Kurita caught the fish July 2 on Lake Biwa, Japan's largest lake.

Kurita's fish tied the record of George Perry, who caught his bass on Georgia's Montgomery Lake on June 2, 1932.  Kurita used 25-pound test line and a live blue gill

And now the picture:

Holy.  Effing.  Crap.

Although using a live blug gill is kind of BS if you ask me. 




WHO SUCKED

1.  Paul Hewitt.  You know, he may be a hell of a recruiter there at Georgia Tech but he sure as hell can't coach.  The level of talent at Tech the last few years has been almost as good as anybody:  Anthony Morrow, Thaddeus Young, Chris Bosh, Jarrett Jack, Will Bynum, and noted gun enthusiast Javaris Crittenton, but his team's have done nothing due to his mismanagement.  Now he might be wasting yet another top level talent in Derrick Favors, who his incredibly talented and is porbably the best player on the team, but is getting just 8 shots a game despite shooting 58% and being the most talented big man in the ACC.  A team with Favors, Iman Shumpert, Gani Lawal, Mfon Udofia, D'Andre Bell should coast to the NCAA Tournament, but instead with Hewitt at the helm they lose to the world's crappiest team (and their in-state rival) Georgia.  Of course after the one year he managed to luck himself into the Final Four he was rewarded with a giant ass contract, so the Jackets are pretty much stuck with him.  Shame.  
[NOTE:  I wrote this before the Jackets picked up a huge win by beating Duke on Saturday.  A more respectable and responsible blogger would probably delete this and type something else up, but I already did a lot of work here so just deal with it.  Once game doesn't mean Hewitt doesn't suck - Favors still only got 6 shots.  And a Georgia Tech fan I know said about that game,  
"They won that game in spite of him.   FT shooting bailed Hewitt out for wasting all our timeouts again. Could have used one with just under a minute left when trapped underneath Duke's basket. Instead give up the easy dunk and put them right back in it.
GT would be just fine if we just played street ball and let the talent determine the results."   

So I'm sticking with "sucks."]

2.  Cincinnati.  Freaking DWG Jinx strikes again, and suddenly the Bearcats are a big ole barrel of suck nation, losing both of their conference games this week to crappy Pitt and terrible Seton Hall to fall to 2-2.  I'm not ready to totally write them off quite yet or anything but I mean, come on guys, what the hell?  Pitt sucks.  Seton Hall sucks.  How are we going to cash in on my 200-1 bet if you dickheads can't even beat bottom middle-tier Big East teams?  And when, exactly, does Lance Stephenson plan on becoming Carmelo Anthony?  Six turnovers against the Pirates isn't going to get it done my friend.  And four points against CS-Bakersfield (a Cincy win sandwiched between the two shameful losses)?  Carmelo would have lit a team like that up for forty.  I'm getting awfully close to dumping them as my second favorite team and jumping on the Ole Miss bandwagon, and lord knows I don't want to do that.  Just beat St Johns and Notre Dame this week and we can all be happy.

3.  Michigan.  We had our first "must-win" game for both teams in Big Ten play this season on Sunday between the Wolverines and Northwestern, and the Wolverines came out on the bottom, 68-62.  Northwestern needed to win because after a great start that included wins over Iowa State, Notre Dame, and Stanford they had started conference play with two losses (including a rout by Michigan State in Evanston) and really needed a win not only to avoid falling to 0-3 but also to get some confidence back.  Michigan was predicted to be an NCAA tournament team and was ranked #15 in the country to start the season but has been awful so far.  They had won back-to-back conference games to get to 2-1 in the Big Ten, and need to win every single game they should win, especially at home, to have the slimmest prayer at a tournament bid.  And, as I said a couple sentences ago, Northwestern won, essentially ending the Wolverines season and it's just early January.  You want to see disaster?  In a ten day span starting January 17th Michigan plays UCONN, Wisconsin, Purdue, and Michigan State.  Ouch.

4.  Washington.  If it seems like a Pac-10 team ends up in this section every week it's probably because they freaking suck, and after a disastrous week by the Huskies it's suddenly gone from a 2-team league to a one teamer and might as well be the WCC at this point.  Washington took a little trip down south to take on the combined 1-4 in the conference Arizona State and Arizona and walked out after getting killed twice.  On Thursday they got beat 68-51 by the Sun Devils after shooting just 36%, totaling just 8 assists, and getting beat on the boards 38-27 and then followed it up by losing to the Wildcats 87-70 after letting Zona shoot nearly 50% from there and getting killed once again on the boards 36-22.  It turns out this really isn't a good team.  I guess when your two best players combine to have a 1-to-3 assist-to-turnover ratio and you have zero post presence you aren't going to have much success.  Want a gambling tip?  Fade Washington the rest of the year.  The public is going to keep thinking they are good, keeping the line a point or two further in Washington's favor than it should be.

5.  Kansas City Royals.  I realize it probably seems a bit odd to have a baseball team in this spot, but there are reasons and said reasons are numerous.  Most recently, and this week which is what qualified them for this spot, they signed Scott Podsednik to a $2 million dollar deal with an option for another year at another $2 million, which altogether is about $3 million too much for a guy with a career OPS+ of 87 coming off a best since 2003 OPS+ of 98 thanks to a silly batting average on balls in play of .342 (league average is about .300 which means he had a very, very lucky year).

This follows up other excellent moves such as signing Jason Kendall (last year OPS+ = 72) for 2 years/$6 million (seriously, I'm not making this up) and trading for Yuniesky Betancourt (OSP+ = 67).  In fact, the Royals lineup this year could, very seriously, end up looking like this:

LF Scott Podsednik (2009 OPS+ = 98)
CF Brian Anderson (69)
RF David DeJesus (106)
1B Billy Butler (124)
DH Jose Guillen (80)
3B Alex Gordon (86)
2B Chris Getz (74)
C   Jason Kendall (72)
SS Yuniesky Betancourt (67)

Wow.  Just wow.  That's like four Matt Tolbert's, two Delmon Young's, an Orlando Cabrera, a Jose Morales, and a Mike Cuddyer.

Zack Greinke must want to kill himself.


Finally, I want to leave you with four discussion topics, and if you've read this far you might as well go a step further and comment on one of these:

1.  I watched Jennifer's Body this weekend (which I enjoyed the hell out of by the way), and found Amanda Seyfried far more attractive than Megan Fox.
2.  Dawger claims "Ohio State isn't even one of the top 100 teams in college basketball this year."
3.  Dawger claims "Cedric Benson is more of an MVP candidate than Philip Rivers."
4.  Dawger claims "Alan Trammell deserves to be in the Hall of Fame just much as Cal Ripken."

Thoughts?

Dawger vs. Intelligence (Baseball-Related)

UND Eats Shit Sandwiches

Its Gopher vs. Sioux weekend so I thought this would be a good time to revive this blog with some sports chatter people actually care about. Both games this weekend will be played in Hitler’s palace (Engelstad Arena) up in lovely Grand Forks, ND. The Gophers enter the weekend ranked #3 in the country with a 10-3-5 record. UND is crawling into the weekend with a 11-10-1 record.

We have been told for years now that UND doesn’t care about the first half of the regular season. That is a good way for UND fans to try and justify a home loss to Alaska and getting 1 pt up in Duluth. The issue with that excuse this year is Coach Hakstol finally has a roster made up of players from his recruiting classes. This means no more high end talent and no second half surge in the standings. This also explains UND starting the second half getting swept at the GL Invite by Michigan St and Michigan Tech “wha-wha-whaaaaa” before rallying for two 4-3 (including OT win at Home) victories over powerful Bemidji State. It has got so bad at UND this year that their Super Fans are calling for Hakstol’s head.

UND is led in scoring this year by Chay Genoway and something called Brad Miller (not the NBA player). Chay Genoway is a very good Offensive defenseman while Brad Miller is, well, Brad Miller. UND also has Ryan Duncan back for his senior season. If you forgot Ryan Duncan stole the Hoby Baker Award from John Toews two years ago. Since winning the award Duncan has become arguably the worst Hoby Baker Award winner in the history of the award. Duncan will now be forever linked to Gino Torretta as the worst major college award winners in the history of college awards. I have a sneaky suspicion the Dawger is secretly a Duncan fan. How else can you explain his complete lack of production.

I do like UND’s frosh goalie Brad Eidness. He is having a bit of a rough year, but guys like Kangas only come every 2008 years. You can’t expect a human frosh goalie to hold up a team, especially a very average team like UND.

I should also mention players Chris Vandevelde and Joe Finley but both players suck and I am tired of talking about UND. Plus the only time anyone will notice Finley is when he cheap shots someone after the whistle or in the handshake line. You might also notice him if an actual fight breaks out. Finley will be the 6-7 blur leaving the screen once the gloves actually drop. Finley is the undisputed king of pussy’s when it comes to fighting. What do you expect, he is from Edina.

The last thing I have to get off my chest is Mario Lamoureux’s name. Mario’s dad needs to be drug outside and have his ass kicked. Not only did he raise his older son to be a complete twat but he tried getting cute with his kids name so it sounds like Mario Lemiuex. An ass kicking is definitely in order here.

Here is a picture of some real women. I am sick of the dirty rags WWWWW keeps giving us.


The Gophers will be led this weekend be our lord and savior Alex Kangas. Alex is undefeated in Englestad Arena and will most likely stay that way after this weekend. Alex’s numbers haven’t been quite as heavenly as last spring but who can complain with a .921 Save% and 2.19 GAA when a player hasn’t been completely on his game. Plus Alex has been busy dealing with everyone’s prayers and other crap god has to deal with.

The Gophers will be in Grand Forks this weekend without their head coach Don Lucia who is suffering from some unknown illness. Coach Lucia has to take some more medical tests on Friday of this week and doctors should know what is effecting him at that time. Plus Lucia figures his team can play without a head coach since UND is basically playing without one also. Rumor has it Lucia also hates the smell of Grand Forks and is looking for any excuse to stay away from stench of sugar beet factories.

The Gophers will finally have their entire roster back. Jay Barriball and Mike Carman are back from injury and Hoeffel, Fairchild and Schroeder are back from the world Jr. Tournament. The only player not available is Taylor Matson. Matson is out the rest of the year with a torn ACL. Did you know Dawger pronounced Matson his favorite player back in October and two weeks later he tore his ACL. I am not kidding. The Dawger curse is for real.

The biggest key for the Gophers this weekend will be the play of their top line. Jordan Schroeder is back which will get Ryan Stoa back on the wing. Stoa has got to start scoring goals again. Jay Barriball also has to find a way to tip in the pesky open net goals he constantly misses. Barriball should honestly have 12 goals this season. Barriball’s shite shooting is also costing Schroeder any chance of being All-American. Patricia White also needs to play on the third line and stay away from either power play unit. This kid has the heart of an interior decorator.

Next, the Gophers have to limit dumb mistakes by their D. Last weekend they gave up way to many 2-1’s by jumping deep into the offensive zone. Fairchild and Fischer should be allowed to make rushes up the ice but the rest of them need to stay put. Especially Wehrs. Ness can get involved on the Power play but he needs to stay home on 5 v 5. He caused way to many odd man rushes last weekend. Plus Ness shoots like a High School JV player. Dawger also continues to talk about Ness being his “Next Guy” but for the benefit of the program I won’t let it happen. Ness has to much talent for Dawger to flush his career down the toilet.

The Todd, rumor has it Schack will be playing this weekend so get your game worn #27 jersey out of the closet.

This is the first weekend in years that the Gophers should enter a weekend with UND and expect to win both games. The Gophers own Engelstad Arena to the tune of a 7-4-0 lifetime record in that dump. The Gophers are very good and the Sioux are down this year. The Gophers have high end talent and the Sioux average talent. The Gophers have the top special teams unit in the nation and the Sioux are average at best in special teams. All this adds up to a split. Gophers win 4-2 on Friday and lose 3-2 on Saturday . Either way UND still sucks .

Did you know Dawger has extremely small nipples? I just found that out yesterday and for some reason it fascinates me.

Best Comments of 2008

I realize most people do their best ofs before the year is quite over, but I'm like a week late. It's hard to go through a full year's worth of posts and read all the comments. Without further ado, here are the best comments of 2008 in no particular order, except chronologically:


- Dawg: "Do you think Hoffbauer will stick around for at least 2 years or will his guranteed NBA lottery pick status force him to leave after his freshmen season?"

- Anonymous: "I will take sweet sweet Pam Oliver anyday"

- Super Sioux Fan: "I am sure you are some old guy who has to stare at it because you cant get it. Creeper"

- The Todd: "I love women...especially ones that are deuce plus and/or in wheel chairs."

- Dawg: "Its a well known fact that Iowans are very anti-vampire."

- Snacks: "fake boobs are very weird"

- Rabid Husky: "Nice blog idiots"

- Joe: "You are without question the most cynical man alive"

- The Todd: "Reason #37 why you are my hero."

- The Todd: "shit my pants drunk or dance with fat girls drunk?"

- Kevin: "Shane Schilling was nice"

- Roy: "Snake is far from a dipshit"

- Jacie Z: "Hot chicks are so nasty!"

- Snake: "I also just had Billy Bob on. One of the greatest pieces of cinema I have ever seen. GOd Damn Mox can sling the pill!"

- Dawg: "I hope they at least have the decency to spit on "it" before they rape us this Sunday"

- Dawg: "I refuse to call a white guy Jamal"

- Everyone: everyone proving how retarded Dawg is about baseball.

- Anonymous: "It's "Hoffarber" not Hoffbauer. You'd think after 20 games you'd know that by now."

- The Sidler: "I always died of dysentery..."

- Larry Eustachy: "Thats the least she could do to make up for her tiny breasts."

- Just telling the truth: "Snacks is gay"

- Anonymous: "This blog just hit rock bottom! Thanks WWWWWWWWWWW, another reader lost!"

- Anonymous: "You guys have to lay off the pipe."

- Jimmy: "I'd rather watch Balls of Fury than read another post from Dawg."

- From the Barn: "another coach was forced to resign because he was underutilizing Rico Tucker."

- Anonymous: "Is that her snizz hanging out?"

- Dawd:"in the last year I've seen you get your ass kicked by a ballerina wearing a white vest and Momma Souix Fan."

- Said Person: "Four Letter Lie is the greatest band ever"

- Dawg: "Why does a team that relies on obtaining free agents on the cheap miss oportunities for a couple of studs that are coming off injuries ie Colon and Prior"

- Theory: "Dr. Acula's boyfriend, Camillo Villegas"

- Dawg: "Give the little gay meat raffle guy from the Knight Cap a pat on his sloppy bottom from me."

- Snack's wife: "i'm all real bitch!"

- Amanda Jax: "the parents will have to sue some poor mexican bar tender from Cancun for his donkey and wool blankets because those sissy mankato students can't handle their drinks."

- Dr. Acula: "My buddy has a gay brother named Colton. His last name is not Iverson. Probably no relation."

- The Sidler: ""Twins Baseball - you're going to need two flasks!""

- Bear: "I'm going to go read Up with Bucky, with a flaccid crank"

- Super Sioux Fan: "most sioux fans are complete douches"

- C. Garey: "If you're looking for friends you've come to the wrong blog"

- Anonnymous: "Has Gardy ever made a mistake? I guess not since he's forgotten more baseball than me."

- C. Haskins: "I want to see a winning product. I couldn't give two shits less what the graduation rate is"

- Holy Hell: "I found this blog by googling suck my crank"

- Anonymous: "I didn't expect Blackburn to regress to the mean in the span of one inning..."

- Hawkeye Fan: "Sorry "friend", You got owned by a farmed raised Iowa boy." - after owning Dawg in one of the staggering amount of arguments he lost in the comments.

- Klinger: "I should clarify for this blog...NHL = National Hockey League - my apologies for wandering into this uncharted territory."

- Snake: "Young's problem is he doesn't swing enough. He needs to take less pitches and just chop away!"

- SLombardozzi#4: "Beasley will be a poor mans Anthony Mason in 2 years."

- Theory: "Tiger could punch an old lady in the face and the announcers would be like, "She probably deserved it."

- The Todd: "My main summer attire includes crocs, workout shorts and an old T'wolves KG jersey from Walmart."

- Snacks: "God I can't stand the people on the gopher hole"

- The Sidler: "Livan is the best pitcher on the team--he has 9 wins"

- Jeremy: "this dude is frickin' hilarious."

- Tiffany L: "So what ever happened to Van Peebles two anonymous "colored" friends on the boat? Hopefully they didn't end up in the water because I am guessing they couldn't swim very well."

- Sharks Love Revenge: "this is by far the best movie review of all time. If I had to listen to that queer talk about paladin's one more time I was going to have to go jump in the ocean hoping that some shark wanted revenge on my family too."

- Tom: "You are clearly one of the top 5 or 6 gopher bloggers out there"

- The Todd: "I'm also known as a very solid penetrator and am currently listed at 5'9/235 with a 17 inch vert and 6.7 forty time."

- Faldo: "Doctors say he will be fine but I say blindness, thats what you get when you dont come through for Faldo you get blindness"

- Dawg: "Blacky wins 16 games next season and probably starts dating Paris Hilton and Lindsay Lohan."

- Anonymous: "there is nothing worse than homer fan"

- Dawg: "By the way my name is Dawg McDawgerson."

- Anonymous: "Gardy is an asshole and so is anyone who doesnt agree."

- Anonymous: "This blog sucks so I would love to read a blog that is average!"

- Bear: "I think it's called You're A Douchebag In C Minor."

- Bogart: "I live in Chicago where I'm a fancy rich lawyer who makes tons of money and I am so much better than you, peasant."

- Matt: "Please spare me with this "blueprint" and "small ball" bullshit."

- Dawg: "The Gophers blew the doors off of Montana State the supposed cream of the I-AA crop."

- Dawg: "Naked Guy looked great taking naked BP today."

- Justin Bobby: "Heidi with Brody, haha, thats just proposterous!"

- Tiffany: "Bogart- You have been portrayed perfectly on this site by WWWWW. Gambling problem (check), poor eye for NFL QB talent (check), love of wearing NFL jerseys (check) and poor skin (check)"

- The Todd: "Suck it long and suck it hard Dharma Bum."

- Theory: "I thoroughly enjoy these golf posts. They're the only posts on here that I read."

- Trig: "Brady is a man's man, ultimate teammate, and a complete gamer"

- Anonymous: "Reason #2986 why dawg is a complete sports retard!"

- Dawg: "The difference between Okposo and a figure skater is the figure skater isn't afraid to get his hands dirty"

- Mama Dawger: "yeah, your a dork. But I still want to be your live in girlfriend."

- Dawg: "I love you more than Woody Allen and Dusty Rychart combined."

- Super Sioux Fan: "everyone looked at me like I was retarded or something."

- Super Sioux Fan: "I am gay"

- Super Sioux Fan: "I hate the gays..........and the jews."

- Dawg: "When your only interaction with African Americans is watching them from 15 rows up at a Gopher Basketball game then you are probably a racist."

- Mama Dawger: "You have obviously never wrestled. It is a pure man's sport. There is nothing homoerotic about it. Other then the singlettes, the 'saturday night ride' and 'checkin the oil'. I know it makes it "sound" gay. But it's really not."

- Bear: "I thought this was Down With Goldy, not Down With A Blatantly Offensive & Racist Mascot"

- Anonymous: "The only thing that could make that show more gay is to have unicorns prance around the set with rainbow streamers tied onto their little horns."

- Dawg: "Weber throws to Decker every time because nobody can cover him."

- Bear: "Hitler wasn't really that bad of a guy"

- The Todd: "Optimator and I would make out every time the Gophers scored."

- Anonymous: "Sounds like Dawg knows as much about Fantasy Football as he does Baseball and college hoops"

- Super Sioux Fan: "I think I am going to remain drunk until the end of this hockey season"

- Anonymous: "But as we know from Twins talk on this blog, expectations cant change mid year and we need to just accept that this team is doing as good as it is being so young."

- Anonymous: "billy bean can shove moneyball up his gay ass"

- Dawg: "I wish I would have got to see him bean Joe Morgan in his fat head."

- Snacks: "Remember how Hargrow used to put his head down and take it to the rack every single time he had a white guy guarding him?"

- Tubtastic: "D2 football = not able to let go. It is the xfl equivalent for college football. They should blast "Glory Days" in the background during all D2 football games."

- The Todd: "You'll be happy to know I babysat my nephew last night which allowed me some cable access for a few brief hours. And in my stupidity I came across a Gopher basketball game. At Indiana. Thinking it was live. I didn't realize until the very end that it was from last March."


And that'll do it. Do I have a favorite? Nope, comments are like kids, I hate every one equally. Keep up the good work in 2009, comments pretty much make this blog.

Punto's Back and Better Than Ever!

For all those nay sayers who said Nick Punto is washed up, what do you have to say now. Sure he has no RBI’s and sure he has no extra base hits and he has a slugging percentage that is equal to his batting average. But that batting average is sitting at .300 and he is playing the field better than Brooks Robinson ever dreamed. Put me on record as saying Gardy is an idiot for not playing Puntozy more. Also, when was the last time a utility player won a gold glove?

You can also put me on record as saying "We" need way more Punto and far less of "I am really fat and can’t catch balls that hit me right in the glove" Kubel. When I say put me on record, I am not talking about the kind of record Snacks goes on where he flip flops his way into convincing himself he made a call ;). I am talking about going on record like the Flying Dutchman back in 1986 when he called World Series during fan appreciation day. By the way Fatboy "WWWW I am talking to Kubel here, not you" nice attempt at stealing 2nd base on Saturday. That steal reminded me of the scene in Major League when Willie Mays Hayes tried stealing 2nd in spring training but comes up short of the bag. Instead of coming up short of the bag your fatass was just out by 10 feet. You should have spared yourself the embarrassment of getting tagged out and just "sprinted" to the dugout as soon as you left first base. That would have been far less embarrassing than your attempted steal...."Shit house!" By the way nice .266 average! God Kubel sucks.

I am smelling MN baseball in October!

P.S. Hoff Sucks! Eat it Dawger!

P.S.S. WWWWW congratulations on baby WWWWWW!

Thank God!

Some good news from the world of Gopher Hockey. Jeff Frazee has left the program and signed a contract with the New Jersey Devils. Thank god this waste of talent and locker space has finally left the program. I had high hopes for this kid when he entered the program and all he ever gave the gophers was a good two or three months at the end of the 2007 season. The one thing I will miss are the easy cheap shots Frazee gave me every week. I will just have to turn my attention more towards ripping the Hoff!!!! Thats right Dawg!

Attention Dawg- I am not Holy Hell. I went back and read HH's post and that person is clearly a mouth breathing knuckle dragger. You now owe me an apology for calling me HH. Snacks and I are both waiting for our apology......and Hoff still sucks!

God Does Love Gophers Hockey!

Last nights Gopher game was one of the most exciting games I have watched in several years while also being one of the most frustrating. I have never seen a team that is so inept at scoring goals in all my life. Hopefully after this season it will be another 30 years before I have to see it again.

A special thanks to Dawger for leaving me at the bar last night by myself. It was really much more enjoyable watching the 2nd overtime with the Hispanic cooks and the table full of metro sexual Sioux fans who thought they where king shit because they just knocked off Michigan Tech in 3 games. Note to all metro sexual Sioux fans, hockey jerseys aren’t meant to be tucked into your jeans and the word "Dude" died with pinned jeans.

Alex Kangas is now the greatest goalie in the history of college hockey. If he doesn’t win the Hoby Baker the next three years they should just do away with the award. If Lucia wouldn’t have screwed him out of playing time the first half of the season Kangas most likely would have gone for the grand slam and won the Hoby all four years of his career. Kangas was so good last night that Dawger had a wet spot on his jeans after the third period.

The Gophers also now skate with Lucifer on their side. Lucia obviously sold his soul to make the NCAA tournament this year. How else can you explain all three Gophers (Barriball, White and Lucia) scoring their sixth goal of the season last night? 6-6-6! Looks like it will be foam parties for the all Gophers other than Kangas! Can the Gophers be beat with both Jesus and Lucifer on their side? I don’t know either.

One of the greatest lines ever mumbled on T.V. took place during the Gophers game last night. Incase you missed it, during the first overtime Doug Woog said "everyone in the arena is standing except for the people in wheel chairs." As soon as he said that I pictured Woog wearing Bogarts I Hate Cripples t-shirt. P.S. Real classy shirt Bogart! Get a heart you unsympathetic son of a bitch!

Final Five Preview to come later this week.

Gophers A Lock For Home Ice!

The Gophers travel to Alaska to take on the Eskimos of Alaska Anchorage this weekend. The beauty of this weekend is the Gophers should find themselves all alone in 7th place when they return to Dinky town Sunday with an outside shot at 6th place. MN currently sits in 8th place, 1 pt behind UMD. The bulldogs play a Saturday/Sunday series vs Eva Braun's Babies (Sioux). I would guess Eva's babies would sweep the Dogs seen as how CC destroyed UMD at the DECC last weekend and UND has to sweep if they want any shot at the WCHA. I am predicting a 4-1 Sioux win on saturday and a 3-0 Sioux win on Sunday. I am also predicting Joe Finley starts another fight after a period/game and once again skates and hides while his teammates clean up his mess. Joe Finley is Basically the Bogart and Woz of college hockey. Just like Bogart and Woz, Finley tries living the life but then ends up pissing the bed and puking all over himself when the real fun starts. Then leaves his teammates/friends to clean up for him.

Mankato heads to Colorado Springs to play the CC Tigers this weekend. Mankato currently sits 4 pts ahead of the Gophers. Once I am predicting CC will sweep at home this weekend. A sweep this weekend will clinch at least a share of 1st place in the WCHA for the Tigers. I also think Mankato just plain sucks so I say CC 5-2 Friday and 4-1 Saturday. With this result and a Gopher sweep of the Eskimos they would now be tied for 6th place in the WCHA. The Gophers also hold the tie breaker over Mankato so that would move them ahead of Mankato as far as home ice seeding are concerned.

The last major series of the weekend has Wisconsin traveling to St. Cloud. No matter what happens here one of these teams is going to finish in front of the Gophers. I would guess we will see a split here, but don't be surprised if St. Cloud pulls off a sweep. Wisconsin struggles scoring goals so if St. Cloud can get up and down the ice this weekend they could pull sweep and lock themselves into home ice. A sweep by St.Cloud would leave the Gophers 1 pt. behind Wisconsin heading into the final weekend of the WCHA. Wisconsin is on bye next weekend so a Gopher split with the Bulldogs next weekend would lock MN into the #5 seed in the WCHA tournament and bring a match up with either Mankato/Duluth/Wisconsin to Mariucci. All of those series which the Gophers would probably be favored in at home. St. Cloud wins 4-2 Friday and Wisconsin wins 3-2 Saturday. F’ing Badger, Gophers now need to sweep UMD next weekend at Mariucci to get #5 seed.

UAA has won just one game since Dec. 29, so they clearly suck worse than the movie Jumper. Last weekend, they were swept at Denver and in the prior two weekends they were swept by both Minnesota State and St. Cloud State. The Eskimos are last in the WCHA in the standings, scoring offense and scoring defense. Their penalty kill is also last in the conference, so the Gopher power play will have a good chance to keep building on last weekend. Basically AA is the Northwestern of college hockey. They just plain suck.

The Gophers are coming off their best offensive performance since the opening weekend of the year. Some of that had to do with Wisconsin's shaky goal tending, but either way the Gophers played fairly well all weekend. The two biggest questions for me heading into this series are the play of the real baby Jesus (Kangas) and can Barriball's continue scoring goals.

Kangas really and truly sucked Saturday night. He sucked to a level that even made Frazee chuckle. It would be nice to see him rebound Friday night and post a shut out or a 1 goal game so everyone can forget about last Saturday. I can't believe I am typing this, but a Frazee sighting on Saturday might be a good idea also. Kangas has played a ton of games down the stretch and a night off might be good for him. It would also be nice to give Drinky a game before playoffs begin incase he is needed. God a feel like dirtier now then I did when I watched the shower scene in The Crying Game.

Barriball getting on a hot streak would be huge for the Gophers going down the home stretch. He showed flashes of the old Barriball last weekend and the goal he scored Saturday was the type of goal that can really give a player a ton of confidence. At least I am running with that theory and hoping it fits here. If Barriball continues to score and the 2nd and 3rd line keeps chipping in a goal or two the Gophers will actually be a tough team to deal with. Lets just see if they can keep this up for three or four weeks.

You see it is all quite simple! The Gophers are a lock for home ice in the WCHA which will give them an at large birth in the NCAA. And you all thought this season was for nothing! The Gophers rule! Actually they still really suck and I have a slight feeling they will wet the bed this weekend and will either lose or tie one game in Alaska. Hopefully that happens on Saturday with Frazee in goal so I can come on here next week calling him fat and drunk. Gophers win 3-1 Friday and 3-2 on Saturday.

If the Gophers lose this weekend I am seriously done with Lucia and calling for the immediate hiring of Dean Blais.

Also, I thought this was actually comical. It is a fight in a Woman's college hockey game. How sad is this? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LZAehXzjG0w . Shockingly a Sioux team is involved.

Lastly. Dawg, how can you expect us to take a movie recommendation seriously when you state moma dawger loved Jumper??? She is the same person who told me Four Letter Lie was the greatest band ever. You just lost all credibility as a critic. P.S. How was that tube sock last night?

Take A Bit Of That Bucky

After Saturday nights 4-4 tie it is clear Jeff Frazee needs to be removed from the Gophers roster immediately. It was obvious that he is clearly sabotaging Kangas. That is the only way you can explain the game Kangas played Saturday night. Not even Frazee on his worst night would have let in the 3 turds Kangas let in Saturday. Just for the Bear, Kangas was going to get hammered with a couple "You Stupid F'ing C*nt" calls after the 4th goal, but luckily for him Jr. Snake was in attendance. Clearly Kangas is still only Jesus and has yet to turn into god.

Once again the Gophers scored 4 goals on Saturday night and two of those where PP goals. Some of that had to do with Wisconsin's goalie eating a piece of Kansas's shite pie, but the Gophers actually looked like they had a clue on the power play. It was also nice to see Jay Barriball score a pair of goals this weekend. His two goal explosion now gives him as many goals as WWWWWWW guy RJ Anderson (5). That is really sad. Hopefully Barriball can mop up a little on the gimps from Alaska and get himself on a bit of a roll.

Derek Peltier really needs to hurry up and graduate. Not only can he not play at a high level, now he thinks he's some type of enforcer. Peltier is constantly taking cheap shots at players as they skate away and taking stupid penalties. His penalty on Saturday night in the 2nd period was a classic example. Some badger throws a clean check into a Gopher player next to the Gophers bench and for some reason Peltier skates over and takes a roughing penalty? Nice captain. This kid is just plain awful and the worst captain I can remember in my 25 years of following the team. Next to Kangas playing like Jeff Frazee and the Gophers trouble clearing the puck out of their end, Peltier was a true black eye on the weekend. Ya he scored a nice goal Friday, but even a blind Squirell finds a nut once in a while. The only good thing about Dawg showing up to the bar at 6:45 was being late to the game and not having to applaud Peltiers goal.

A message to the guy who sat in front of me during saturdays game. I get Jesus is cool and he is your savor, but you can't make your entire family (wife and 2 kids) say grace before eating hotdogs at a sporting event. Your kids already look like they have no shot in life unless Dungeons and Dragons becomes a professional sport. Making them say grace at sporting events is just going to get them heckled which will lead to them hating you even more than they already will.

Overall the weekend was a success for the Gophers. Some how the Gophers are sitting at #14 in the Pairwise Rankings and need to move up one more spot to make the field of 16 for the NCAA tournament. Currently UMD is in 13th, but they are in complete free fall mode. Duluth hoists UND this weekend at the DECC while the Gophers travel to play the ever mighty Seawolves of Alaska Anchorage. If the Gophers do not take a minimum of 4 points out of this weekend they can piss off. Alaska wouldn't win the MN High School tournament so there are no excuses for not sweeping this series. Especially when they know a sweep will put them into position for the NCAA and give them a first round opponent much easier than Denver, UND or CC.

Lastly, I was told about this "great" band called Four Letter Lie. I have been making fun of said person for a couple days about how this band sucks and a monkey banging on two empty soup cans sounds better. So yesterday I decided to check them out on the internet and give them a shot. Lets just say that is 15 minutes of my life I will never get back. First of all, their website has not been updated since 2/12/07, but they do have a myspace page???? Unless you want everyone of your fans to be 16 years old or younger get a regular website. For everyone else on this blog, please do not tell me a band is the greatest band ever when their upcoming concerts are going to be played at venues such as Jerry's Pizza and Bulldog Pizza. Also, Four Letter Lie is going to be rocking in "Rogers", MN on April 3rd at Showcase Skate Park???? That is 10 minutes from my house if anyone wants to have a pre concert party at my place! Actually, they could move the concert to my basement and the only reason I would go down there would be to shut off the power to my house. These guys seriously suck and whichever band member is trying to look like Jon Bon needs his ass kicked.

P.S. WWWWWWW, Carman is mine, so back off my man bitch!

Grades For Hockey Team

- The following conversation took place at Williams are.......Jimmy's Bar during the Gophers vs Iowa game.

WWWWWWW- "Hey Snake, You better turn out a hockey post next week or your fired."

Snake- "But Boss Man, The hockey team is on bye next week."

WWWWWWW- "I don't care I want more hockey. I love hockey. Why don't you do a report card for all the players."

Snake- "I guess I could do that"

WWWWW- Thinking to himself, "God that report card idea is so good I will steal it back and use it for the hoops team. Then Snake will look like a complete ass when he posts his grades at the end of the week."

WWWWW- "Also, I am thinking about granting Dawg blogging rights so he can review movie's. How bad to you think they could be?"

Snake- "Ummmm??????Ahhhhh??????Ummmmmm????????"

- Wednesday afternoon.

Snake- Thinks to himself when he sees WWWWW's hoops report card, "God I hate WWWW and his irrelevant blog. I am going to punch him in his slightly over weight gut next time I see him for sand bagging me. What an ass."

Snake- Thinks to himself after reading Dawgs blog, "Man, Dawgs review really sucked. Did he really pick Balls of Fury for his first post?" "God that was bad, it was like he blanked on bits after the first paragraph."

- Here are the grades I have given the Gophers for the season thus far. Thanks again for stealing my thunder WWWWWW! Hope you like your F'ing hockey report card.

Kangas and Wheeler (A)

Rest of team (F)

Frazee (F-) "Leave the program already!" "You Suck!"

W, There are your grades you indian giving SOB.

Balls of Fury

I have decided to review the epic picture Balls of Fury as my first post for WWWWW. I rented this crapper at the behest of Momma Dawger aka Soiux Fan. She has the 3rd worse taste in movies behind her sister who ironically recommended this film to Soiux Fan and Snake.

Soiux Fan's sister's movie recommendation resume includes box office smashes such as Bench Warmers and Nacho Libre. Snake has recommended turds such as Super Troopers, Crash (not the academy award winning version but the movie starring Super Perv James Spader in which he intentionally gets into car accidents and then makes love to the wounds in his woman's body). and Van Wilder part II the Rise of Taj.

Anyways back to the review. Balls of Fury is about this prodigy (raging Nerd)Ping Pong player named Randy Daytona. He ends up choking in the finals against against an East German homo wearing a wrestling singelet. So far absolutely nothing remotely funny has happened.

Fast forward 19 years and Randy Daytona has morphed into a 5'4" super chubby Nerd with long wild hair, sports a head band and likes to rock. He is a very poor man's version of Jack Black. He does the same schtick but it is way less funny. Thats
saying a lot because I think Jack Black sucks worse then Dane Cook.

I was fooled into thinking that this movie might be redeemed by Christopher Walken's character (who doesn't show up until the movie's midpoint) but I was wrong again. Walken mails in his performance because even he could tell that there wasn't anything that would save this miserable movie. Memo to Chris Walken : Start reading the script before agreeing to do any old movie that comes your way.

The Ping Pong scenes were so outrageous because there was no getting around Randy Daytona and his short, stubby, fat legs and arms could be good at anything other then playing video games and smoking pot. Then the movie went completely overboard when the smoking hot Asian chick somehow falls in love with this squatty misfit. It was disgusting. I'm sure in hind sight she wishes she would have broke into hollywood the old fashioned way and done porn.

I won't bore you with any more details from this crap box movie. I will also warn you that there isn't enough booze or pot in the world to make this movie enjoyable. I highly recommend avoiding this movie at all costs. You will never look at Ping Pong or hot Asian chicks the same.

Gopher Hockey Travel West

The Gophers travel to Denver, Colorado this weekend to take on the Pioneers of Denver University. WWWWW, get the picture? Oregon Trail......the Gophers play the Pioneers..... get it! Pure brilliance on my part. That picture does remind of one thing that always pissed me off as a kid. How in the hell was that little slut Mary always breaking her arm or getting sick? Every time you would start making some progress on your journey to Oregon you would receive an urgent message that little slut girl is hurt again or drank some water and has diarrhea. Seriously, someone should have just traded Mary to the indians for a bottle of fire water and 2 blankets. Having Mary on the Oregon trail would be like driving home from Canada or Madison with Dawg, only 10 times worse. Back to hockey. Minnesota's mission is to see if they can actually get more than 1 pt this weekend. With the way the Gophers have been scoring this season I would say no chance, but things haven't been going very smoothly for Denver the past 3 weekends either.

Denver has lost 4 of their past 5 games (loss to Air Force and twice to Mankato, ooouch) and their leading scorer, Brock Trotter, left school earlier this week. Rumors have been flying all over the internet about why Trotter left school. He has been accused of cheating on a test, plagiarism (WWWW, you should have him write for this blog), legal troubles or having personal issues. Seen as how this is part of that internet thing I am going to go on record as saying the reason Trotter left school is his teammates outed him on a road trip a couple weeks ago. How is that for breaking news! The University has kept quiet about the matter, only saying the Trotter is still a member of the team. The only thing that is known for sure is Trotter will not be playing this weekend and I still say he is gay and ashamed. Sophomore Tyler Ruegsegger was injured last weekend when Denver was swept by Mankato State and is questionable for this weekends series. If both Trotter and Ruegsegger are out this weekend it is very likely a pair of soccer matches will break out again this weekend.

A couple notable Denver players that will actually put on a pair of skates this weekend are freshman forward Tyler Bozak (12 goals and 11 Assists) and sophomore forward Rhett Rakhshani (9 goals 10 assists). Both are extremely talented young players who could be dominant when Trotter and Ruegsegger are also in the lineup. Chris Butler is the lead man on Denver's D and is a classic offensive defenseman. Butler is strictly a puck mover and nothing illustrates that more than his zero penalty minutes for the season....pussy! Lastly, the key for Denver this weekend will be goalie Peter Mannino. Mannino is one of the elite goalies in college hockey and that spells trouble for a Gopher team that couldn't score with puck bunnies right now.

As usual the key for this weekend will be wether or not the Gophers can actually score 3 goals in a game. If I was Bogart, and bet on everything humanly possible, I would bet the Gophers would not score 3 goals in a game this weekend. To make things worse, Denver's penalty kill is one of the best in the WCHA. That is not good since the Gophers sport one of the worst power plays in all of college hockey. The two bright spots for the Gophers the past couple of weeks have been the play of Defense and of course Alex Kangas. The Defense was suppose to be this teams weak link coming into the season and since December have been very good. If the Gophers could ever find a couple of goals their D and goalie are actually playing well enough for them to make a run. Alex Kangas should have his jersey retired right now. Not only has he been outstanding, he is also the guy who banished Jeff Frazee from my life. For that I will always owe him and would gladly give him my first child in return. I love you Alex.

The Gophers will play Friday nights game without Tony Lucia who is suspended for "the fight" at the end of last saturdays game. Expect Hoeffel to move up to the 2nd line and fill Lucia's spot. I have heard a lot of crap this week from homer gopher fans who think the little slap and tickle episode with UND last weekend will bring this team together??? Seriously, if all it takes is a cat fight to get this team playing well I will be the first guy through the doors at Blarney's next October looking to start shit with next years incoming freshmen. It would almost be worth the beating to actually watch good hockey next winter.

My prediction, the Gophers tie 2-2 and win 3-1. That is right, I am now changing what I said earlier in this post, the gophers will score three goals in one game. Probably not, but I didn't want to be all negative like WWWWWWW. Friday nights game is on BTN at 8 PM and Saturdays game is on FSN following the Wild game. Also, why is the gophers game part of hockey day MN (or what ever cheesy name FSN is calling saturday), but the game isn't in MN? Why wouldn't FSN work with the WCHA and have MN play UMD or another MN team this weekend??? F'ing retards. Hockey Day MN my ass!

**Extra** Alex Goligoski was called up by the Pittsburgh Penguins this week. Add another player to the list of players the Gophers coaches never developed.