- Can anyone explain this Derrick Rose thing? So with the Bulls up 3-2 they have a chance to close out New Jersey in Chicago, knowing a loss sends this back to a game 7 in Jersey so this is basically a do or die game. Both Kirk Hinrich, who started at PG in place of Rose all year, and Luol Deng, probably the team's best perimeter defender, are out and in case you forget New Jersey has Derrick Williams. In Game 5 in a similar situation (no Hinrich) Williams abused Nate Robinson for 23 and 10 assists, and as I write this mid-way through the second quarter he already has seven assists. All this could potentially be handled by Rose, you know the former MVP and all, coming back and playing which, by the way, his doctor's have cleared him to do. It's just weird.
- I'm all over Revolutionary for the Derby on Saturday (10/1 right now I believe). He's got good results, he's ridden by Calvin Borel (the pimp daddy of all jockeys) and he drew a position near the rail but not on it (#3) which is where Borel loves to be. There's also a good possibility of rain and Revolutionary rates as the 2nd best wet track horse in the field (behind Oxbow) and Borel likes sloppy tracks as well. Everything sets up well for Revolutionary, which actually kind of scares me a bit, but I put a good amount on him to win and boxed him up with Normandy Invasion and Orb in a trifecta. I also let the wife pick a horse (Goldensoul because she's a hippy at heart) and let the daughter pick one as well (Charming Kitten because she's five) while throwing a bit on Will Take Charge as my longshot and still hold a WIN ticket on itsmyluckyday that I put down on a couple of months ago. I hit the winner 3 years ago (Super Saver) and wife hit it last year (I'll Have Another) so I think we're due for another win.
- I made the decision not to get HBO this year in order to save money and I knew Game of Thrones was going to be the biggest test. They tried to suck me in with the free preview that let me watch episode 1 but I held strong. Then I spent the night at Snacks' place and he's got HBO and has all the episodes and we watched two over there and I thought I was screwed, but luckily I remember that all HBO subscribers get access to HBOGO so I can used Snacks' ID and stuff and watched the last couple to get all caught up and my god this show is just so amazingly good.
I am a huge fan of the books and I never, ever imagined they could have done it this well. All the cool shit from the books was done right and all the stuff they changed, added, or eliminated has been done exceptionally well to the point where I honestly don't have any complaints. There's tons of hot chicks and boobs and butts and stuff which is of course welcome, but honestly the story and the drama completely sucks me in even though I know what's going to happen already. Daenarys with the unsullied, Jamie's hand, the fight at Craster's, even something with no action like Sansa discussing Joffrey with Margaery (hot as fire) and Lady Tyrell are all good enough to be the biggest moment of the season in pretty much any other show, and we ain't seen nothing yet. If I had to pick the best 3 non-comedic tv shows in history I'd go with Lost (the first 3 seasons or so), Walking Dead, and Game of Thrones, and GoT is so far beyond those other two it'd be like if Jim Thome raced a horse. A good horse. Also no, I have never seen The Wire or Breaking Bad (although I plan to eventually) so shut it.
- So Kahn out, Flip in, eh? Tough to fault it, and I'm sure Glen Taylor pours himself a drink every time he watches Steph Curry score 16 points in a quarter and then thinks about Jonny Flynn is probably on the And 1 Tour at this point. Really, outside of Darko over Melo and Wade and Oden over Durant that might end up the worst draft pick of this generation. Unfortunately, because otherwise Dawger will rake me over the coals in the comments, I have to admit that I thought Steph Curry was on the fast train to bustville. I was convinced his big numbers at Davidson were because he played sub-par competition and his team was so dependent on him that he was going to score big no matter what, but I though his absolute upside was a spot up shooter like Steve Novak or Craig Hodges. My oh my was I ever wrong. The guy is a completely dynamic scorer and one of the best shooters I've ever seen. If he ever figures out how to drive to the rim he's going to be unstoppable, and he kind of is already. It takes a strong man with a great character to admit when he's wrong, and that man is me.
- So Byron Buxton hit another home run tonight. That's his fifth for Cedar Rapids and coming into the night he was hitting .383/.510/.667 with 5 doubles, 3 triples, 4 HRs, and 10 steals in 14 attempts. Simply put - he's killing low A ball in just his second year and he's just 19 years old. I know you don't want to rush a teenager, but it's just silly. He's walking more than he's striking out, hitting for a huge average and showing massive power while stealing bases like crazy. He leads the Midwest league in slugging, OPS, runs, and walks, is #2 in average and OBP, and is top 5 in homers, total bases, steals, RBI, and triples. Between him and Miguel Sano (.368/.435/.747 with 9 homers) the Twins might end up with two top 10 prospects when the mid-year Baseball America prospect ratings come out. Pretty cool shit.
- I still can't believe Joe Johnson was ever a max deal player.
Showing posts with label Derrick Rose. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Derrick Rose. Show all posts
Thursday, May 2, 2013
Wednesday, October 31, 2012
NBA Central Division Preview
Kyrie plus Dion
Equals offensive rebounds
galore for Andy.
Cleveland's post-Lebroncalypse rebuilding effort continues in 12-13. They landed Dion Waiters and Tyler Zeller in the draft. Some thought Waiters was a bit of a reach as he didn't even start in college. He looked a bit clunky and out of shape in the summer, struggled in the pre-season, but scored 17 points with 3 steals in one NBA game so far! Zeller may not be a complete stiff, which is good because Varejao will draw some calls before the trade deadline. The Alonzo Gee/CJ Miles/Omri Casspi show at the 3 has to be the worst in the league. Second year PF Tristan Thompson was the #4 overall pick in 2011 and will look to build on a promising run as a starter at the end of last season.
Starting Unit:
PG Kyrie Irving
SG Dion Waiters
SF Alonzo Gee
PF Tristan Thompson
C Anderson Varejao
They had 21 wins last season and the over/under is 30.5. The question is are CJ Miles, Zeller and Waiters worth more than Antawn Jamison, Ramon Sessions, Anthony Parker and uh...Christian Eyenga? For this year, I say no, but it's certainly better for the future. Under 30.5.
What the mother eff?
How did Noah score that?
Bet she has a 'stache
Last year Chicago went 50-16 and were aiming to do some damage in the playoffs when Derrick Rose's knee burst into flames. Now he may not return until February or March and it's up to Kirk Hinrich and Nate Robinson to keep his spot warm and keep the team winning. Deng and Boozer will be relied on heavily to provide offensive punch that doesn't involve the aforementioned 42% shooters. If Rip Hamilton can stay healthy for a year that would help too. This is still a strong defensive team under Thibodeau with Deng, Taj Gibson and Noah. Former Marquette small forward Jimmy Butler also gets his shot this year after missing last season with injury. He's also a lock down type defender.
Starting Unit:
PG: Kirk Hinrich (goggles version)
SG: Rip Hamilton (faceguard version)
SF: Luol Deng
PF: Carlos Boozer
C : Joakim Noah
The o/u is 47.5 and despite no Rose for the bulk of the year I'm going over. One, this squad will stay in games with defense and perhaps the new additions of Hinrich/SuperNate/Butler/Bellinelli and a full year of Rip can score enough points to make them a winner. I also suspect that Rose is busting his ass to be back early.
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Good thing nobody
Watches NBA basket-
ball in Wisconsin
Actually, it's not quite as bad as my haiku makes it seem. The Bucks have decent starters at every position save small forward, but are forced to rely on Monta Ellis and Brandon Jennings to both co-exist and be the stars on the team. Former first round pick Tobias Harris will be given a shot to be the starting small forward at least until Luc Richard meh Mehbute returns. Ersan Ilyasova had a break through year and if either of the guards share he could build on an impressive '11-12 season. He had 13 points and 9 rebounds per game despite only starting in 41 contests and playing just 27.6 minutes per game. Every one of those numbers will increase for this season. Samuel Dalembert is a solid defensive center that will block some shots and get some rebounds for them. The Bucks added lanky defensive freak John Henson from North Carolina in the first and may have also scored with second round pick Doron Lamb of Kentucky. They'll hopefully provide some needed depth.
Starting Unit:
PG Brandon Jennings
SG Monta Ellis
SF Tobias Harris
PF Ersan Ilyasova
C Samuel Dalembert
This team doesn't blow me away, and I think the o/u is pretty accurate at 36.5, but since I'm a predicting machine, I'll go over.
What's better than eight
points scored over nine seconds?
Strippers and booze, duh.
The Pacers are a well built team that appear to have ever growing expectations. They have one my favorite players in the NBA in Paul George and he'll be relied upon heavily early with Danny Granger's knee acting all wonky. Granger is going for the dreaded second opinion, which could lead to surgery of some sort. Darren Collison is in Dallas this year which means IUPUI's own George Hill will be the point guard this season. He's not as flashy as Collison, but can shoot it and protects the ball. David West is still a productive 4 and Hibbert continues to play borderline all-star basketball at the pivot. Sam Young of Pitt and Gerald Green of slam dunks will see more time because of Granger's absence as well. Green has recently shown a lot of scoring ability, it sure would have been neat if he did that as a member of the Wolves. The bench also features Tyler Hansbrough, Ian Mahinmi, Miles Plumlee and Lance Stephenson, so they have some depth there.
Starting Unit:
PG George Hill
SG Paul George
SF Sam Young
PF David West
C Roy Hibbert
The Pacers have a 51.5 o/u and I'd hit the under solely because of Granger. If there is good news on the second opinion, I'd go over.
Bad boys they aren't
but there are some good signs here.
Miss America
The Pistons rebuilding effort really begins with talented play of Greg Monroe. In just his second full season he was a double double machine, averaging 12/10. He also can handle the ball well and gets his share of blocks and steals on the defensive end. Brandon Knight will be entering his second season after a solid rookie campaign where he had 13/3/4 and shot 38% from downtown. He'll look to expand on those numbers, especially the assists. Stuckey is a player more suited to be a combo guard off of the bench, but seeing as Kim English and Will Bynum are the depth in the backcourt, he'll be leaned on to be a scorer. Prince, Maggette, Singler, Jerebko, Maxiell, Daye and Villanueva are part of a cluster of forwards that make shake any number of ways. The Pistons likely regret not trading Tayshaun when they had a chance; now he's just a bloated contract in a complimentary player. Ideally for the Pistons, first round selection Andre Drummond from UConn develops at a high speed and takes over the 5 spot shifting Monroe to the 4.
Starting Unit:
PG Brandon Knight
SG Rodney Stuckey
SF Tayshaun Prince
PF Jason Maxiell
C Greg Monroe
The Pistons are at a 31.5 o/u and I'm going under I like Knight and Monroe to continue to develop, and there's enough depth there to steal a few wins but I feel a late season tank coming on here.
Tuesday, May 31, 2011
Week in Review - 5/30/2011
Another excellent Memorial Day weekend, probably the best weekend of the year. I caught the biggest crappie, biggest northern, and biggest bass out of everybody at the cabin, and while this would usually be the point where I'd brag about how awesome I am - and I am - but pretty much everybody killed it, or at least as much as we could when it wasn't too windy. We collectively caught a ton of crappies that all ranked among the biggest we ever caught at the cabin, and in one stretch of about 45 minutes out on the boat we caught 15 northerns. It was totally awesome. You're so jealous. Anyway I'm really tired so you can expect a definite half-assed effort here.
WHO WAS AWESOME
1. Nick Blackburn. Generally he's pretty overrated, but I get it - good lookin' guy, killer side burns, little bit of a "I don't care what anybody think about me" beard, unflappable on the mound, and just a cool, calm guy who can absolutely shut down a team once in a while, so I get it. If you actually look at stats and whatnot, however, he's generally been pretty bad over his career, even finishing in the top 4 in hits allowed twice in his career. I have to give it up to him, however, because he has somehow become the team's only reliable pitcher - the only one you know will keep you in the game this year.
In his six games pitched in the month of May his worst outing would have been today - 6ip, 7 hits, 5 runs. Using Game Score (I won't bore you but it's explained mid-page right here) that comes out as a 40. Looking at every other Twins starter they've only equaled or beaten that score 19 times between five guys, and only 16 times prior to this weekend before the hapless Angels gave everybody a boost. Blackie's average for the month was 59, a score only reached by a non-Blackburn twin 7 times. All of which is a nerdy way of saying that an average Nick Blackburn outing is probably better than the best any other Twin can pitch right now, which is actually of really succinctly summing out just how crappy this season is going.
2. Mike Miller. This already feels like a million years ago but technically it happened last week, but did you see Miller against the Bulls in those final two games? After playing sparingly in the first two playoff rounds and even in the first 3 games versus Chicago he suddenly burst back onto the scene and played 26 and 24 minutes in games 4 and 5, averaging 10 pts and 8 rebs in the two games and, no joke, was probably the biggest reason the Heat won game 4 and swung the series. No kidding if you watched it he registered the majority of his stats in the fourth and absolutely was the difference in that game. There's a decent change he'll matter again against Dallas, but let me tell you watching him in that fourth quarter was jarring and a reminder of how good he used to be. At Florida, I mean, when he played a complete game, not the jump-shooting nancy boy he became in the NBA.
3. Bartolo Colon. I will admit that I thought Colon was a big-fat tub of goo who was basically washed up and done and when the Yankees signed him I was like "good, suck it Yankees you queers!" but well fuck me I guess. Colon shut out the A's today on just four hits while striking out six, and now has just a 3.26 ERA on the year. And I don't care because the Yankees are still stupid and still suck and Bartolo is still fat and has a stupid name. He's probably going to give up eleventeen runs his next time out, assuming he's not throwing at the Twins.
4. Carl Crawford. Well it's about time, Mr. Crawford. After signing that huge contract with the Red Sox he's been one of the biggest disappointments of the year and was sort of the symbol for Red Sox suckage to start the season, but he's starting to turn it around. Well, he's had a few good games, I should say, including a 4-4 with 2 doubles and a homer on Wednesday and 4-5 with two triples the next day. Then I went out of town and now I just looked up his next few games and they were 0-4, 0-3, and 0-4. So who knows. He's still just hitting .232/.267/.362 now for the year, which sounds bad but would be the fifth highest OPS on the Twins. Wow. Fifth highest on the worst team in the league. I guess he's still really bad. But at least he had a good week. Has any twin had even a single 4-hit game this year? Looking it up, yes. Span had 4 hits April 13th and Cuddyer had four the day before. So the Twins have gone nearly two months without a 4-hit game from a single player, and one the season have as many as Carl Crawford, the guy synonymous with disappointing player this year, had in one week. This season is so much fun.
5. Michael Morse. I seriously have no idea who this guy is, but I do a lot of wagering on individual players and the Nationals have been a gold mine to bet against players not getting an rbi or not scoring a run in a game. So every time I see Washington has scored a run I have to look up immediately how they scored to see if I lost a bet and need to punish myself. So that's how I know that Morse hit a home run on Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Friday, and Monday and in that stretch he's knocked in 11 of his team's total 27 runs. So I picked up in Fantasy. Stay tuned to find out if I'm a genius, like I was with Charlie Morton.
WHO SUCKED
1. Derrick Rose. No lie, it was kind of tough to watch Rose those last couple of games against Miami. The good news is he clearly wanted the ball, was the leader, and was aggressive. The bad news was he couldn't have scored with your mom after a glass of white zin. He's still one of the best in the NBA and he'll be fine and all, but yuck. More here if you need it.
2. Kevin Durant. Much the same as Rose, Durant certainly didn't do himself any favors in the final few games against the Mavericks. In game 3 he was 0-8 from three, in game 4 he turned it over 9 times including a killer down the stretch where he just straight lost control of the ball, and overall he shot just 23% from three for the series. I love the guy and he's obviously one of a handful of people you'd consider as your #1 choice if you were starting a franchise, but I almost wonder if he needs a littler more killer in his blood. I'm interested to see if any kind of possible feud develops between him and Westbrook. You can only have one alpha on a team, and it's obvious to everyone that Durant should be that alpha - obvious to everyone except Durant and Westbrook. Pay attention. You'll see.
3. Washington Nationals. It's hard to believe a team could be as bad as the Twins - because that's actually impossible so the joke's on you - but Washington is bad, bad, bad. They're 1-8 in their last 9 and have given up five or more runs in six of those games while scoring three or less runs in five (we've already talked about that offense above). That's a bad combination. Also a bad combination? Their rotation. Jason Marquis and Livan Hernandez in the same rotation? Possibly the two worst pitchers of the last five years? Seriously that's like the pitching equivalent of a middle infield combination of Alexi Casilla and Matt Tolbert, as if anybody would be dumb enough to roll with those two.
4. Joakim Soria. Did I, or did I not, tell you about this? I did, because I'm a genius and so much smarter than you. Soria's week - 2/3 inning, 3 runs allowed, blown save - 1 good ip in a meaningless 12-7 game - 2/3 ip, 2 runs allowed, blown save - 1 ip, 3 runs allowed, blown save. He now has an ERA of almost 7 and is seven for twelve in save opps after having now blown 4 of his last 5. Done. And I told you so.
5. Car Racing. I normally wouldn't bother to include car racing in the sucks column since it always sucks - I mean, come on man, it's just cars driving in a circle and whoever has the fastest car wins, you know it, I know it, and racing fans know it no matter what they try to say - but tonight was a special case. I only know this because it was all over the radio when I was driving back from the cabin, but now we have special proof of how stupid it all is. There were two big races this weekend, one in each league (called, I believe, NASCAR and NASCAR2), and in one some dude was winning until the very last turn on the last lap where, for some unknown reason, he drove straight in a wall despite having a big lead and ended up finishing second, and the other where some dude was winning almost until the end when he ran out of gas. He ran out of gas. He ran out of gas in car racing. That would be like a baseball player going out into the field without his glove (I would guess Casilla almost does this twice a week) or a basketball player not wearing shoes. So dumb. But honestly if you like racing you probably don't own a computer so you can't read this and your Memorial Day BBQ likely consisted of squirrel or possum or whatever you ran over in your truck recently (you know, your truck with a door that's a different color than the rest of the truck and has a sticker of calvin pissing on a logo on the back window, along with an "Ass, Cash, or Grass bumper sticker.) In conclusion, racing is stupid and so is your face.
Since I mentioned Memorial Day BBQ you're probably wondering what we had. So I will tell you. We simply had Kobe beef burgers on the grill (lightly seasoned with salt and pepper - you don't want to mess with these too much - and topped with provolone), corn on the cob (garlic and herb butter), and really excellent cauliflower gratin that Mrs. W made. It was excellent, and I highly recommend going for the Kobe burgers once in a while. They're about twice the price of regular burger patties and about 3 times more than lump burger you form yourself, but holy crap they were worth it. Also, before any smartass posts a comment here, I will come clean and admit I screwed up cooking turkey burgers and brats on the grill this weekend, but in my defense I haven't cooked on a charcoal grill since we got our sweet gas one about 6 years ago. Plus everything was fine once my dad figured out the bottom grate was closed. So shut up.
WHO WAS AWESOME
1. Nick Blackburn. Generally he's pretty overrated, but I get it - good lookin' guy, killer side burns, little bit of a "I don't care what anybody think about me" beard, unflappable on the mound, and just a cool, calm guy who can absolutely shut down a team once in a while, so I get it. If you actually look at stats and whatnot, however, he's generally been pretty bad over his career, even finishing in the top 4 in hits allowed twice in his career. I have to give it up to him, however, because he has somehow become the team's only reliable pitcher - the only one you know will keep you in the game this year.
In his six games pitched in the month of May his worst outing would have been today - 6ip, 7 hits, 5 runs. Using Game Score (I won't bore you but it's explained mid-page right here) that comes out as a 40. Looking at every other Twins starter they've only equaled or beaten that score 19 times between five guys, and only 16 times prior to this weekend before the hapless Angels gave everybody a boost. Blackie's average for the month was 59, a score only reached by a non-Blackburn twin 7 times. All of which is a nerdy way of saying that an average Nick Blackburn outing is probably better than the best any other Twin can pitch right now, which is actually of really succinctly summing out just how crappy this season is going.
2. Mike Miller. This already feels like a million years ago but technically it happened last week, but did you see Miller against the Bulls in those final two games? After playing sparingly in the first two playoff rounds and even in the first 3 games versus Chicago he suddenly burst back onto the scene and played 26 and 24 minutes in games 4 and 5, averaging 10 pts and 8 rebs in the two games and, no joke, was probably the biggest reason the Heat won game 4 and swung the series. No kidding if you watched it he registered the majority of his stats in the fourth and absolutely was the difference in that game. There's a decent change he'll matter again against Dallas, but let me tell you watching him in that fourth quarter was jarring and a reminder of how good he used to be. At Florida, I mean, when he played a complete game, not the jump-shooting nancy boy he became in the NBA.
3. Bartolo Colon. I will admit that I thought Colon was a big-fat tub of goo who was basically washed up and done and when the Yankees signed him I was like "good, suck it Yankees you queers!" but well fuck me I guess. Colon shut out the A's today on just four hits while striking out six, and now has just a 3.26 ERA on the year. And I don't care because the Yankees are still stupid and still suck and Bartolo is still fat and has a stupid name. He's probably going to give up eleventeen runs his next time out, assuming he's not throwing at the Twins.
4. Carl Crawford. Well it's about time, Mr. Crawford. After signing that huge contract with the Red Sox he's been one of the biggest disappointments of the year and was sort of the symbol for Red Sox suckage to start the season, but he's starting to turn it around. Well, he's had a few good games, I should say, including a 4-4 with 2 doubles and a homer on Wednesday and 4-5 with two triples the next day. Then I went out of town and now I just looked up his next few games and they were 0-4, 0-3, and 0-4. So who knows. He's still just hitting .232/.267/.362 now for the year, which sounds bad but would be the fifth highest OPS on the Twins. Wow. Fifth highest on the worst team in the league. I guess he's still really bad. But at least he had a good week. Has any twin had even a single 4-hit game this year? Looking it up, yes. Span had 4 hits April 13th and Cuddyer had four the day before. So the Twins have gone nearly two months without a 4-hit game from a single player, and one the season have as many as Carl Crawford, the guy synonymous with disappointing player this year, had in one week. This season is so much fun.
5. Michael Morse. I seriously have no idea who this guy is, but I do a lot of wagering on individual players and the Nationals have been a gold mine to bet against players not getting an rbi or not scoring a run in a game. So every time I see Washington has scored a run I have to look up immediately how they scored to see if I lost a bet and need to punish myself. So that's how I know that Morse hit a home run on Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Friday, and Monday and in that stretch he's knocked in 11 of his team's total 27 runs. So I picked up in Fantasy. Stay tuned to find out if I'm a genius, like I was with Charlie Morton.
WHO SUCKED
1. Derrick Rose. No lie, it was kind of tough to watch Rose those last couple of games against Miami. The good news is he clearly wanted the ball, was the leader, and was aggressive. The bad news was he couldn't have scored with your mom after a glass of white zin. He's still one of the best in the NBA and he'll be fine and all, but yuck. More here if you need it.
2. Kevin Durant. Much the same as Rose, Durant certainly didn't do himself any favors in the final few games against the Mavericks. In game 3 he was 0-8 from three, in game 4 he turned it over 9 times including a killer down the stretch where he just straight lost control of the ball, and overall he shot just 23% from three for the series. I love the guy and he's obviously one of a handful of people you'd consider as your #1 choice if you were starting a franchise, but I almost wonder if he needs a littler more killer in his blood. I'm interested to see if any kind of possible feud develops between him and Westbrook. You can only have one alpha on a team, and it's obvious to everyone that Durant should be that alpha - obvious to everyone except Durant and Westbrook. Pay attention. You'll see.
3. Washington Nationals. It's hard to believe a team could be as bad as the Twins - because that's actually impossible so the joke's on you - but Washington is bad, bad, bad. They're 1-8 in their last 9 and have given up five or more runs in six of those games while scoring three or less runs in five (we've already talked about that offense above). That's a bad combination. Also a bad combination? Their rotation. Jason Marquis and Livan Hernandez in the same rotation? Possibly the two worst pitchers of the last five years? Seriously that's like the pitching equivalent of a middle infield combination of Alexi Casilla and Matt Tolbert, as if anybody would be dumb enough to roll with those two.
4. Joakim Soria. Did I, or did I not, tell you about this? I did, because I'm a genius and so much smarter than you. Soria's week - 2/3 inning, 3 runs allowed, blown save - 1 good ip in a meaningless 12-7 game - 2/3 ip, 2 runs allowed, blown save - 1 ip, 3 runs allowed, blown save. He now has an ERA of almost 7 and is seven for twelve in save opps after having now blown 4 of his last 5. Done. And I told you so.
5. Car Racing. I normally wouldn't bother to include car racing in the sucks column since it always sucks - I mean, come on man, it's just cars driving in a circle and whoever has the fastest car wins, you know it, I know it, and racing fans know it no matter what they try to say - but tonight was a special case. I only know this because it was all over the radio when I was driving back from the cabin, but now we have special proof of how stupid it all is. There were two big races this weekend, one in each league (called, I believe, NASCAR and NASCAR2), and in one some dude was winning until the very last turn on the last lap where, for some unknown reason, he drove straight in a wall despite having a big lead and ended up finishing second, and the other where some dude was winning almost until the end when he ran out of gas. He ran out of gas. He ran out of gas in car racing. That would be like a baseball player going out into the field without his glove (I would guess Casilla almost does this twice a week) or a basketball player not wearing shoes. So dumb. But honestly if you like racing you probably don't own a computer so you can't read this and your Memorial Day BBQ likely consisted of squirrel or possum or whatever you ran over in your truck recently (you know, your truck with a door that's a different color than the rest of the truck and has a sticker of calvin pissing on a logo on the back window, along with an "Ass, Cash, or Grass bumper sticker.) In conclusion, racing is stupid and so is your face.
Since I mentioned Memorial Day BBQ you're probably wondering what we had. So I will tell you. We simply had Kobe beef burgers on the grill (lightly seasoned with salt and pepper - you don't want to mess with these too much - and topped with provolone), corn on the cob (garlic and herb butter), and really excellent cauliflower gratin that Mrs. W made. It was excellent, and I highly recommend going for the Kobe burgers once in a while. They're about twice the price of regular burger patties and about 3 times more than lump burger you form yourself, but holy crap they were worth it. Also, before any smartass posts a comment here, I will come clean and admit I screwed up cooking turkey burgers and brats on the grill this weekend, but in my defense I haven't cooked on a charcoal grill since we got our sweet gas one about 6 years ago. Plus everything was fine once my dad figured out the bottom grate was closed. So shut up.
Thursday, May 26, 2011
Six Very Important Things from Last Night - 05/26/2011
What's that? A post in the patented "6 Things" format? Righteous! Well aren't you lucky. And go:
1. The Twins still suck. This time it was Erik Bedard who shut them down, causing Gardenhire to say retarded Gardenhire things like "filthy", "great stuff", and "guys were swinging and missing by a foot." Now that last one might be true, but I'd say it had more to do with the Twins being terrible, terrible, terrible at hitting than anything to do with Erik Bedard. The same Bedard who hasn't been filthy - or pitched in the majors - since 2009 and was lit up by both the Indians and Royals earlier this year. I will admit he's been pretty solid lately, but I refuse to give him any credit or any pitcher who shuts down the Twins any credit because these guys are god damn terrible. They have two guys hitting above .270, only 5 guys with an OBP over .300, and 3 guys slugging over .400 and two of those are part-timers (Plouffe, Thome). To be completely honest with you, I'm pretty sure Ila Borders could start and would allow less than 3 runs to these cream puffs.
2. Zack Attack is back, Jack. In news that feels AL Central related but isn't, Zack Greinke finally put together a vintage Zack Greinke performance yesterday afternoon going seven strong innings, striking out 10 and allowing just a 3-run homer to Mike Morse (note: who? his name may not actually be Mike. I didn't look it up.) to wreck a very nice day. And, just to add on to his re-breakout performance, he also hit a ding dong which gave the Brewers a 4-3 lead. It was Greinke's first time throwing 100 pitches since returning from injury, and he looked damn good. This now gives the Brewers a very good rotation on paper: Greinke, Marcum, Narveson, Wolf, and Gallardo, except not on paper Marcum is the only one whose been worth a damn. Luckily their offense has been good enough to keep them just 2.5 games out of first. If Greinke has it together it's going to be huge for them. Of course, as soon as the Milwaukee media starts asking tough questions he'll probably crumple into fetal position and cry to his mom.
3. The future may be bleak. ESPN came out with their first set of team recruiting rankings for 2012 and of the top 10 (that's all they rank) you'll find four Big Ten teams. Indiana is #1 (fo real) with four ESPN top 100 guys already signed, highlighted by big time PG Kevin Farrell and some weirdo with the first name Hanner. Michigan State is ranked #3 with some highly rated white dudes, Purdue is #8 with a handful of really good back court players, and Michigan ranks tenth with Glenn Robinson's kid and the second coming of Jon Deibler. The Gophers' list of 2012 commits? Zero. Joy.
4. This happened Tuesday night, but what happened to Derrick Rose? I know he's basically the reason the Bulls have gotten as far as they have, but whoa how bad did he choke in that game? He couldn't hit anything most of the game, but saved his most special screw-ups for crunch time - a great trait in your crunch time player. First he made only one of two free throws with just over a minute left and the Bulls down by one. Then, he missed a mid-range jumper that would have given the Bulls the lead with 28 seconds left, and followed that up by by air-balling the potential game winner at the end of regulation by forcing a fade away weird forced thing. Then, in overtime, he failed to score a single point (and only managed one shot) and committed a crucial turnover with just over a minute left and the Bulls down 4. There's no doubt he's one of the five best young players in the NBA, but watching that game was like watching Chris Webber call that timeout again, but stretched out for an entire half + overtime.
5. Speaking of the NBA, Kobe must want full control of the Lakers. I can't think of any other reason the team would hire Mike freaking Brown, who is most famous for failing to get the most out of Lebron James and helping hasten his departure out of town, helping to turn Cleveland into even more of a wasteland than it already was, but without their one shining hope - like what would happen to Fargo if some intrepid young soul was to burn NDSU to the ground. Basically his entire idea of coaching offense is to give the ball to his star and just let him and wait a minute I totally get it. Kobe would have definitely had a large hand in deciding who was going to be the next Laker coach, and a coach with no clue on how to run a coherent offense who is almost totally dependent on his star player to create points is perfect for a selfish son of a bitch like Bryant. Everybody knows there are two things Kobe loves: being completely in charge of the basketball, and naive 17-year old hotel managers.
6. Finally, late tonight the old man Mavericks knocked off the Thunder to advance to the NBA finals. For the second straight game the Thunder seemed in control of the game, but once again Dallas came back in the end to get the win, this time thanks to not one but two open three-point looks for Dirk Nowitzki with the Mavs trailing in the final couple of minutes. Dirk hit the second one to give Dallas the lead and they never looked back. I hope to god they can beat the Heat in the finals, because make no mistake this is probably the worst version of this Heat team we're going to get. They're still in some ways learning to play together and I'm pretty sure they'll figure out a way to upgrade their supported cast in the coming seasons. Do you really want a Heat dynasty? Better than a Laker one, at least, but Dirk deserves a ring. I'm 100% Maverick fan now.
Also the Phillies/Reds played 19 innings last night, with the Phillies finally pulling it out on a sac fly by Raul Ibanez. It seems like the kind of thing that I could fit into my six relevant things or whatever, but it's the national league so let's be honest nobody gives a crap. The two teams combined to use 16 pitchers, all of whom are better than anybody the Twins have on their roster.
1. The Twins still suck. This time it was Erik Bedard who shut them down, causing Gardenhire to say retarded Gardenhire things like "filthy", "great stuff", and "guys were swinging and missing by a foot." Now that last one might be true, but I'd say it had more to do with the Twins being terrible, terrible, terrible at hitting than anything to do with Erik Bedard. The same Bedard who hasn't been filthy - or pitched in the majors - since 2009 and was lit up by both the Indians and Royals earlier this year. I will admit he's been pretty solid lately, but I refuse to give him any credit or any pitcher who shuts down the Twins any credit because these guys are god damn terrible. They have two guys hitting above .270, only 5 guys with an OBP over .300, and 3 guys slugging over .400 and two of those are part-timers (Plouffe, Thome). To be completely honest with you, I'm pretty sure Ila Borders could start and would allow less than 3 runs to these cream puffs.
2. Zack Attack is back, Jack. In news that feels AL Central related but isn't, Zack Greinke finally put together a vintage Zack Greinke performance yesterday afternoon going seven strong innings, striking out 10 and allowing just a 3-run homer to Mike Morse (note: who? his name may not actually be Mike. I didn't look it up.) to wreck a very nice day. And, just to add on to his re-breakout performance, he also hit a ding dong which gave the Brewers a 4-3 lead. It was Greinke's first time throwing 100 pitches since returning from injury, and he looked damn good. This now gives the Brewers a very good rotation on paper: Greinke, Marcum, Narveson, Wolf, and Gallardo, except not on paper Marcum is the only one whose been worth a damn. Luckily their offense has been good enough to keep them just 2.5 games out of first. If Greinke has it together it's going to be huge for them. Of course, as soon as the Milwaukee media starts asking tough questions he'll probably crumple into fetal position and cry to his mom.
3. The future may be bleak. ESPN came out with their first set of team recruiting rankings for 2012 and of the top 10 (that's all they rank) you'll find four Big Ten teams. Indiana is #1 (fo real) with four ESPN top 100 guys already signed, highlighted by big time PG Kevin Farrell and some weirdo with the first name Hanner. Michigan State is ranked #3 with some highly rated white dudes, Purdue is #8 with a handful of really good back court players, and Michigan ranks tenth with Glenn Robinson's kid and the second coming of Jon Deibler. The Gophers' list of 2012 commits? Zero. Joy.
4. This happened Tuesday night, but what happened to Derrick Rose? I know he's basically the reason the Bulls have gotten as far as they have, but whoa how bad did he choke in that game? He couldn't hit anything most of the game, but saved his most special screw-ups for crunch time - a great trait in your crunch time player. First he made only one of two free throws with just over a minute left and the Bulls down by one. Then, he missed a mid-range jumper that would have given the Bulls the lead with 28 seconds left, and followed that up by by air-balling the potential game winner at the end of regulation by forcing a fade away weird forced thing. Then, in overtime, he failed to score a single point (and only managed one shot) and committed a crucial turnover with just over a minute left and the Bulls down 4. There's no doubt he's one of the five best young players in the NBA, but watching that game was like watching Chris Webber call that timeout again, but stretched out for an entire half + overtime.
5. Speaking of the NBA, Kobe must want full control of the Lakers. I can't think of any other reason the team would hire Mike freaking Brown, who is most famous for failing to get the most out of Lebron James and helping hasten his departure out of town, helping to turn Cleveland into even more of a wasteland than it already was, but without their one shining hope - like what would happen to Fargo if some intrepid young soul was to burn NDSU to the ground. Basically his entire idea of coaching offense is to give the ball to his star and just let him and wait a minute I totally get it. Kobe would have definitely had a large hand in deciding who was going to be the next Laker coach, and a coach with no clue on how to run a coherent offense who is almost totally dependent on his star player to create points is perfect for a selfish son of a bitch like Bryant. Everybody knows there are two things Kobe loves: being completely in charge of the basketball, and naive 17-year old hotel managers.
6. Finally, late tonight the old man Mavericks knocked off the Thunder to advance to the NBA finals. For the second straight game the Thunder seemed in control of the game, but once again Dallas came back in the end to get the win, this time thanks to not one but two open three-point looks for Dirk Nowitzki with the Mavs trailing in the final couple of minutes. Dirk hit the second one to give Dallas the lead and they never looked back. I hope to god they can beat the Heat in the finals, because make no mistake this is probably the worst version of this Heat team we're going to get. They're still in some ways learning to play together and I'm pretty sure they'll figure out a way to upgrade their supported cast in the coming seasons. Do you really want a Heat dynasty? Better than a Laker one, at least, but Dirk deserves a ring. I'm 100% Maverick fan now.
Also the Phillies/Reds played 19 innings last night, with the Phillies finally pulling it out on a sac fly by Raul Ibanez. It seems like the kind of thing that I could fit into my six relevant things or whatever, but it's the national league so let's be honest nobody gives a crap. The two teams combined to use 16 pitchers, all of whom are better than anybody the Twins have on their roster.
Tuesday, April 19, 2011
6 Very Important Things from Last Night
Remember last year there was that very exciting 2-week or so period where I was writing daily posts so you worker drones would have something to do while you drink your coffee at your desk every morning? And then my stupid second baby was born and that all went right out the window? Well, I'm bringing it back. Daily posts, either regular type posts or, if I don't have anything I'm thinking about writing about, I'll do it in this "6 things" list format. Starting today and going until I get bored or lazy.
1. Drew Butera is my hero. Mauer schmauer, who needs 'em? The Twinks won their second straight, beating the Orioles 5-3 last night and giving Francisco Liriano his first win of the season. Matt Capps tried to blow the game in the ninth by giving up a crushed home run to Luke Scott, but it turns out when you're up by three no matter how long of a home run you give up it's still only worth one point.
The real story of the game, however, was "no hit" Butera who went 2-4 with a career high three RBI, two coming on a big double in the second to give the Twins the lead, and the last one coming in the ninth, helping to give the Twins in a little insurance, something they will always need since they have the world's worst bullpen. So a multi-hit game with three RBI, clutch hits, zero stolen bases by Baltimore probably because they were too afraid to run on his cannon arm, and such an outstanding ability to all a game that he made Francisco Liriano, Jose Mijares, and Jim Hoey all good, and Matt Capps only allowed one run which I assume is a season best? I think this might be the Joe Mauer we always wanted, and without all the little baby injuries and "viruses." With the DH spot already locked up I think it's time we start exploring trading him before it's too late. I'll have to have a post later this week looking at what the Twins might be able to get for Mauer. Stay tuned.
2. Harrison Barnes is coming back. Yep, Barnes, a consensus top-3 pick in the NBA draft, will be returning to North Carolina for his sophomore hoops season. The effect of this is two-fold. First, with John Henson and Tyler Zeller also staying in school plus the additions of James McAdoo (Rivals #8 overall player nationally and a guy who is just going to be ridiculous), P.J. Hairston (#14 nationally), and Desmond Hubert(#15 Center), the Tar Heels are going to be the prohibitive favorite to win the National Title (although if Kendall Marshall gets hurt it's over for them - he's the single most important player in college basketball next year). The second, and more Minnesota-centric, effect is that this year's NBA draft is going to completely suck. With Barnes, Baylor's Perry Jones, and Ohio State's Jared Sullinger all staying in school the only real blue-chippers are Arizona's Derrick Williams and Duke's Kyrie Irving. We've all been here before. Pencil the Wolves in for the third pick. And of course with next year shaping up to be one of the deepest and best classes in recent memory the Wolves have already traded their pick. Oof.
3. This guy who was almost a Twin can really hit the ball. And he's a shortstop. You may remember the name Jed Lowrie, because he was part of the package the Red Sox offered the Twins for Johan Santana way back when. The full offer was Lowrie, Jon freaking Lester, Justin Masterson, and Coco Crisp. Lowrie is currently hitting .516 with 2 home runs after going 4-5 with a dinger today in the Red Sox 9-0 thumping of Toronto, and would be leading the league in average with just a few more plate appearances (not to mention he'd be tied for the team lead in homers if he was a Twin) and is starting to look like a potential franchise type shortstop.
Which means that with a different decision, Johan could have netted the Twins a possible franchise shortstop, a #1/#2 type starter, a potential #3/#4 type starter (depending on your opinion of Masterson), and another outfielder who could have been a trade chip, made someone else a trade chip, or at a minimum might have stopped the Twins from picking up Cuddy Bear's option which pays him $11 fucking million this year to hit singles. Instead, they ended up netting out with two crappy relievers the Orioles didn't want (yes Hoey looked ok last night) and a pitching prospect who lost velocity and can't get out of double-A. I know hindsight is 20/20, and I know that according to prospect rankings the trade with the Mets looked about on par with the Sox trade, but god damn it does it rankle me every time I see Lowrie or Lester do well. Imagine how much better this team would be if that was the trade they made. I'm going to go light something on fire.
4. Use up that $2.27 million signing bonus already? In what can only be described as "totally fucking bizarre", Cincinnati Reds second year pitcher Mike Leake was arrested for stealing $60 worth of shirts from Macy's. I totally don't get it because first of all Leake's signing bonus a year and a half ago was $2.27 million. Second, he is making $425 million this year. Third, he stole six shirts whose total cost was $59.98, or under 10 bucks a piece. Fourth, the guy is a total stud and is soon, within the next couple few years, going to end up signing a nice big contract. Fifth, what the fuck? And finally, these are apparently the brand of shirts he was stealing. What the hell? You're telling me you can't just go down to ragstock or the salvation army and get the same thing for like a buck a piece?
Only two possible explanations here. First, Leake must be a huge pothead and was just confused. like Smokey after he ate too much corn. If I may be allowed to generalize and stereotype, Leake has surfer hair and went to Arizona State, so I'll assume he's not unfamiliar with the herb. Plus he went straight to the pros from the minors so he hasn't really had any time to "grow-up" or "be poor", if you will. The second possibility is that Macy's is somehow infested with a demon that causes athletes to steal even when it's the dumbest thing they could possibly do. Is it possible that Royce White was really innocent and it was just some evil force that made him try to steal those pants and push that old man? Maybe Fred Hoiberg is a secret Choctaw shaman who was able to recognize that Royce was good at heart and was just possessed, cast out the demon, and is now ready to reap the rewards of an All-American season. Stupid Baptist Tubby. I bet if they had hired Archambeau he'd be all over this.
5. Look out, world. Here comes Pricey. Tampa's David Price burst onto the scene in the 2008 playoffs, had a decent rookie year, then last year finished second in the Cy Young balloting, so his slow start this year was a bit puzzling. Well you can stop worrying so much, because he completely shut down the Sox last night, going 8 shut-out innings, allowing just four hits and striking out nine. That's the Price I'm talkin' about. Plus he did it to the White Sox, the most evil team in the history of evil, even worse than the Nazis or Packers. Does this make David Price some kind of Angel or maybe God? But in November of 2007 the owner dude changed the team name from Devil Rays to Rays, just three short months after they drafted and signed Price. Coincidence? You tell me, Robert Stack. You tell me.
6. The Pacers almost did it again. For the second straight game the Pacers looked like they might be in position to steal a win in Chicago, and for the second straight game Derrick Rose said "No soup for you." Seriously, this guy is ridiculous and completely unguardable. When it gets down to it in the fourth Chicago justs shifts into the "give Rose the ball and everybody get out of the way" offense and he gets to the rim and either finishes, gets fouled, or finds an open teammate - and nobody on the Pacers can keep him out of the lane. Last night he scored 14 of his 36 in the fourth quarter, similar to Game 1 when he scored 9 of his 37 in the quarter and came up with the game's biggest play on an assist to Kyle Korver for a three to give the Bulls the lead. Completely ridiculous. This is just like watching me play at the Y - completely unstoppable.
1. Drew Butera is my hero. Mauer schmauer, who needs 'em? The Twinks won their second straight, beating the Orioles 5-3 last night and giving Francisco Liriano his first win of the season. Matt Capps tried to blow the game in the ninth by giving up a crushed home run to Luke Scott, but it turns out when you're up by three no matter how long of a home run you give up it's still only worth one point.
The real story of the game, however, was "no hit" Butera who went 2-4 with a career high three RBI, two coming on a big double in the second to give the Twins the lead, and the last one coming in the ninth, helping to give the Twins in a little insurance, something they will always need since they have the world's worst bullpen. So a multi-hit game with three RBI, clutch hits, zero stolen bases by Baltimore probably because they were too afraid to run on his cannon arm, and such an outstanding ability to all a game that he made Francisco Liriano, Jose Mijares, and Jim Hoey all good, and Matt Capps only allowed one run which I assume is a season best? I think this might be the Joe Mauer we always wanted, and without all the little baby injuries and "viruses." With the DH spot already locked up I think it's time we start exploring trading him before it's too late. I'll have to have a post later this week looking at what the Twins might be able to get for Mauer. Stay tuned.
2. Harrison Barnes is coming back. Yep, Barnes, a consensus top-3 pick in the NBA draft, will be returning to North Carolina for his sophomore hoops season. The effect of this is two-fold. First, with John Henson and Tyler Zeller also staying in school plus the additions of James McAdoo (Rivals #8 overall player nationally and a guy who is just going to be ridiculous), P.J. Hairston (#14 nationally), and Desmond Hubert(#15 Center), the Tar Heels are going to be the prohibitive favorite to win the National Title (although if Kendall Marshall gets hurt it's over for them - he's the single most important player in college basketball next year). The second, and more Minnesota-centric, effect is that this year's NBA draft is going to completely suck. With Barnes, Baylor's Perry Jones, and Ohio State's Jared Sullinger all staying in school the only real blue-chippers are Arizona's Derrick Williams and Duke's Kyrie Irving. We've all been here before. Pencil the Wolves in for the third pick. And of course with next year shaping up to be one of the deepest and best classes in recent memory the Wolves have already traded their pick. Oof.
3. This guy who was almost a Twin can really hit the ball. And he's a shortstop. You may remember the name Jed Lowrie, because he was part of the package the Red Sox offered the Twins for Johan Santana way back when. The full offer was Lowrie, Jon freaking Lester, Justin Masterson, and Coco Crisp. Lowrie is currently hitting .516 with 2 home runs after going 4-5 with a dinger today in the Red Sox 9-0 thumping of Toronto, and would be leading the league in average with just a few more plate appearances (not to mention he'd be tied for the team lead in homers if he was a Twin) and is starting to look like a potential franchise type shortstop.
Which means that with a different decision, Johan could have netted the Twins a possible franchise shortstop, a #1/#2 type starter, a potential #3/#4 type starter (depending on your opinion of Masterson), and another outfielder who could have been a trade chip, made someone else a trade chip, or at a minimum might have stopped the Twins from picking up Cuddy Bear's option which pays him $11 fucking million this year to hit singles. Instead, they ended up netting out with two crappy relievers the Orioles didn't want (yes Hoey looked ok last night) and a pitching prospect who lost velocity and can't get out of double-A. I know hindsight is 20/20, and I know that according to prospect rankings the trade with the Mets looked about on par with the Sox trade, but god damn it does it rankle me every time I see Lowrie or Lester do well. Imagine how much better this team would be if that was the trade they made. I'm going to go light something on fire.
4. Use up that $2.27 million signing bonus already? In what can only be described as "totally fucking bizarre", Cincinnati Reds second year pitcher Mike Leake was arrested for stealing $60 worth of shirts from Macy's. I totally don't get it because first of all Leake's signing bonus a year and a half ago was $2.27 million. Second, he is making $425 million this year. Third, he stole six shirts whose total cost was $59.98, or under 10 bucks a piece. Fourth, the guy is a total stud and is soon, within the next couple few years, going to end up signing a nice big contract. Fifth, what the fuck? And finally, these are apparently the brand of shirts he was stealing. What the hell? You're telling me you can't just go down to ragstock or the salvation army and get the same thing for like a buck a piece?
Only two possible explanations here. First, Leake must be a huge pothead and was just confused. like Smokey after he ate too much corn. If I may be allowed to generalize and stereotype, Leake has surfer hair and went to Arizona State, so I'll assume he's not unfamiliar with the herb. Plus he went straight to the pros from the minors so he hasn't really had any time to "grow-up" or "be poor", if you will. The second possibility is that Macy's is somehow infested with a demon that causes athletes to steal even when it's the dumbest thing they could possibly do. Is it possible that Royce White was really innocent and it was just some evil force that made him try to steal those pants and push that old man? Maybe Fred Hoiberg is a secret Choctaw shaman who was able to recognize that Royce was good at heart and was just possessed, cast out the demon, and is now ready to reap the rewards of an All-American season. Stupid Baptist Tubby. I bet if they had hired Archambeau he'd be all over this.
5. Look out, world. Here comes Pricey. Tampa's David Price burst onto the scene in the 2008 playoffs, had a decent rookie year, then last year finished second in the Cy Young balloting, so his slow start this year was a bit puzzling. Well you can stop worrying so much, because he completely shut down the Sox last night, going 8 shut-out innings, allowing just four hits and striking out nine. That's the Price I'm talkin' about. Plus he did it to the White Sox, the most evil team in the history of evil, even worse than the Nazis or Packers. Does this make David Price some kind of Angel or maybe God? But in November of 2007 the owner dude changed the team name from Devil Rays to Rays, just three short months after they drafted and signed Price. Coincidence? You tell me, Robert Stack. You tell me.
6. The Pacers almost did it again. For the second straight game the Pacers looked like they might be in position to steal a win in Chicago, and for the second straight game Derrick Rose said "No soup for you." Seriously, this guy is ridiculous and completely unguardable. When it gets down to it in the fourth Chicago justs shifts into the "give Rose the ball and everybody get out of the way" offense and he gets to the rim and either finishes, gets fouled, or finds an open teammate - and nobody on the Pacers can keep him out of the lane. Last night he scored 14 of his 36 in the fourth quarter, similar to Game 1 when he scored 9 of his 37 in the quarter and came up with the game's biggest play on an assist to Kyle Korver for a three to give the Bulls the lead. Completely ridiculous. This is just like watching me play at the Y - completely unstoppable.
Friday, November 20, 2009
I haven't been to New Jersey in a while. I haven't missed it.
Sorry I haven't posting while out here in Jersey so far this week, folks, but each night when I got back to my hotel room I was just plain tuckered. The first night the plane didn't land until 7:30, and after the hour drive to the hotel we had dinner (cajun chicken sandwich, fries) and then I finally got to my room about 10. I didn't want to start drinking since I had a long day the next day, and god knows the only way I can get up the effort to type on this stupid blog is if I'm into a little bit of Grandpa's cough medicine.
And boy was I right about a long day. A scheduled eight-hour meeting just kept going and turned into a ten hour meeting, which meant there was no break before dinner. And wow. This was a 3.5 hour dinner, no joke. Everybody there had to order every course. First, we had to get appetizers for the entire table (calamari, prosciutto, grilled shrimp, eggplant, brie bruschetta, mozzarella), then salad (I had a ceasar), main course (cajun rib-eye, roasted squash, whipped potatoes - and that rib-eye was not cajun in the least), and then everyone just had to get desert (I almost got a port, but since I had to drive went with the creme brule). Then when I got to the hotel, I had emails waiting for me with questions that needed answering that night, so needless to say blogging was out of the question.
Tonight, however, I am on my own and the only thing I have to accomplish is getting on a shuttle to the airport at 9am tomorrow, so I can have a little time for just me and you, my old friend, just me and you. I had a nice simple dinner (bacon cheeseburger, onion rings) with a couple beers and a couple cocktails (vodka & tonic), and picked up a six-pack of Coors Light Silos on my way to the hotel. So let's see what we see, shan't we?
- For some reason the internet is telling me the Gophers are up just 32-24 at half against Utah Valley, which is less than encouraging. I almost tried to write a quick preview of the game last night, but when I was researching Utah Valley I realized it wasn't worth it because they are god awful. But now the Gophers are just up 8 at half. I know, thanks to texts from Snacks and Grandslam, that Westbrook is out because of food poisoning, and I know I said I thought he was heading for a "special" senior season, but come on. It's Utah Valley. I'm almost certain a roster of Terrance Simmons, Steve Esselink, David Grim, Travis Busch, and Kevin Loge could take these guys. I'm going to assume the second half is going to go much better.
- In more impressive news, I watched Syracuse kick the crap out of Cal tonight in the bar. I may have underrated the Cuse. From my vantage point it was tough to tell who was doing what (Wes J might have had 5 or 25 for all I know) but one thing I could tell is the Orange point guard situation is in much better shape than I anticipated. Scoop Jardine looked great (how could I doubt a guy named Scoop?), and this kid Brandon Triche looked really good as well. He's going to be a star in two years.
- Gophers now up 41-26. Much better. I feel now like I can relax, and just get ready to watch Ohio State beat the piss out of the Gay Heels. Seriously. You watch.
- Speaking of basketball, I'm sure you're dying for an update on my college basketball fantasy league. I won't post the whole draft list, you can find the earlier picks in some other posts, but here is an update since I last posted:
8.12 DWG - Damian Johnson, F, Minnesota
9.1 DWG - Edwin Ubiles, G/F, Siena
9.2 TLEF - TaJuan Porter, G, Oregon
9.3 NotoriousTREJetBrit - Rotnei Clarke, G, Arkansas
9.4 Saintfool - Theo Robertson, G/F, Cal
9.5 Aerial Assault - Matt Bouldin, G, Gonzaga
9.6 WuBanger - Jason Love, C, Xavier
9.7 Truck - Herb Pope, F, Seton Hall
9.8 Jeter23 - Austin Freeman, G, Georgetown
9.9 Tar Heel Boy - Mike Tisdale, C, Illinois
9.10 BasketballCoach - Avery Bradley, G, Texas
9.11 Tobias Funke - Armon Johnson, G, Nevada
9.12 Balco - Vernon Macklin, F/C, Florida
10.1 Balco - Elias Harris, F, Gonzaga
10.2 Tobias Funke - Michael Dunigan, C, Oregon
10.3 Basketball Coach - Klay Thompson, G, Washington St.
10.4 Tar Heel Boy - William Buford, G, Ohio St.
10.5 Jeter23 - Scotty Hopson, G, Tennessee
10.6 Truck - Malcolm Lee, G, UCLA
10.7 WuBanger - Durrell Summers, G, Michigan St.
10.8 Aerial Assault - Ekpe Udoh, F/C Baylor
10.9 Saintfool - Raymar Morgan, F, Michigan St.
10.10 NotoriousTREJetBrit - Bo Spencer, G, LSU
10.11 TLEF - Nolan Smith, G, Duke
10.12 DWG - Jordan Crawford, G, Xavier
11.1 DWG - Brandon Paul, G, Illinois
11.2 TLEF - Joe Trapani, F, Boston College
11.3 NotoriousTREJetBrit - Eric Boateng, C, Arizona State
11.4 Saintfool - Landon Milbourne, F, Maryland
11.5 Aerial Assault - Ryan Rossiter, F, Siena
11.6 WuBanger - Tyler Roche, F, Boston College
11.7 Truck - Jimmy Butler, G/F, Marquette
11.8 Jeter23 - Storm Warren, F, LSU
11.9 Tar Heel Boy - Mike Singletary, F, Texas Tech
11.10 BasketballCoach - DeWayne Reed, G, Auburn
11.11 Tobias Funke - Dee Bost, G, Mississippi St.
11.12 Balco - John Jenkins, F, Vanderbilt
12.1 Balco - Chandler Parsons, F, Florida
12.2 Tobias Funke - Derwin Kitchen, G, Florida State
12.3 Basketball Coach - Mike Davis, F, Illinois
12.4 Tar Heel Boy - Marcus Ginyard, G, North Carolina
12.5 Jeter23 - Marshall Moses, F, Oklahoma St.
12.6 Truck - John Roberson, G, Texas Tech.
12.7 WuBanger -
12.8 Aerial Assault -
12.9 Saintfool -
12.10 NotoriousTREJetBrit -
12.11 TLEF -
12.12 DWG -
That gives me a team of:
G: Chris Warren - Ole Miss, Nic Wise - Arizona, Deonta Vaughn - Cincy, Jordan Crawford - Xavier, Brandon Paul - Illinois
F: Luke Harangody - Notre Dame, Tyler Smith - Tennessee, Damian Johnson - Minnesota, Edwin Ubiles - Siena
C: JaJuan Johnson - Purdue, Derrick Favors - Georgia Tech
I like it. Coming up, I'm hoping to get Ralph Sampson and Courtney Fortson. Sampson is even more valuable since centers are such a commodity, I probably should have taken him last round. I'm nervous because not only because of the rare good centers thing, but because I know team NotoriousTREJetBrit is from Minnesota, and was not happy when I picked DJ. Hopefully Ralphie slips by them, I'm going to be heartbroken if I miss out on Ralph.
Fortson is a risk because he's suspended right now, and actually I haven't looked into exactly why and that's probably something I should investigate before I pick him. But on stats alone, he would have gone at least two rounds earlier and probably more like four. If he cuts down on turnovers he'd be a fantasy, and real life, star. I'm willing to risk it, since I'm very solid at guard.
- Just heard on ESPN2 "The Big Ten is the deepest conference in America" right as they go into Penn State highlights. Oops (although I do happen to agree with that sentiment, except maybe the Big 12). I have no doubt I will write about this further on Monday. That's right Penn State, you officially suck. To give you a quick preview, Penn State was a 12 point (or so, I don't remember exactly) favorite, and my instinct said to bet Wilmington. Then I researched Wilmington, and switched to Penn State because UNCW sounded THAT bad.
- Now with 9 minutes to go, it's just 51-43 Gophers. I think they were like a 26 point favorite. This is disappointing. And so is this Ohio State game. Kyle Madsen over Dallas Lauderdale? Why would you make that call, especially against UNC and Ed Davis and Deon Thompson? No Lauderdale is in at least, but if they can avoid playing Madsen the rest of the game, it would be a good move.
- Now 17-11 UNC. P.J. Hill just scored. Barf.
- I just went to get ice and now suddenly it's 26-11 North Carolina. My prediction of Ohio State as a final four sleeper is suddenly looking like my "JP Losman will have a breakout year" call.
- Wow, the Gophers somehow managed to win 76-51, and snacks reminds me that it was a -24.5 spread. WE WIN!
- Wonderbaby is freaking awesome, by the way, thanks for asking. She can now count to four, and she was advanced enough in her gymnastics thing to skip a whole class, and is now tumbling with three year olds. She's 19 months. Suck it, every other baby. And she even likes yard work.
And boy was I right about a long day. A scheduled eight-hour meeting just kept going and turned into a ten hour meeting, which meant there was no break before dinner. And wow. This was a 3.5 hour dinner, no joke. Everybody there had to order every course. First, we had to get appetizers for the entire table (calamari, prosciutto, grilled shrimp, eggplant, brie bruschetta, mozzarella), then salad (I had a ceasar), main course (cajun rib-eye, roasted squash, whipped potatoes - and that rib-eye was not cajun in the least), and then everyone just had to get desert (I almost got a port, but since I had to drive went with the creme brule). Then when I got to the hotel, I had emails waiting for me with questions that needed answering that night, so needless to say blogging was out of the question.
Tonight, however, I am on my own and the only thing I have to accomplish is getting on a shuttle to the airport at 9am tomorrow, so I can have a little time for just me and you, my old friend, just me and you. I had a nice simple dinner (bacon cheeseburger, onion rings) with a couple beers and a couple cocktails (vodka & tonic), and picked up a six-pack of Coors Light Silos on my way to the hotel. So let's see what we see, shan't we?
- For some reason the internet is telling me the Gophers are up just 32-24 at half against Utah Valley, which is less than encouraging. I almost tried to write a quick preview of the game last night, but when I was researching Utah Valley I realized it wasn't worth it because they are god awful. But now the Gophers are just up 8 at half. I know, thanks to texts from Snacks and Grandslam, that Westbrook is out because of food poisoning, and I know I said I thought he was heading for a "special" senior season, but come on. It's Utah Valley. I'm almost certain a roster of Terrance Simmons, Steve Esselink, David Grim, Travis Busch, and Kevin Loge could take these guys. I'm going to assume the second half is going to go much better.
- In more impressive news, I watched Syracuse kick the crap out of Cal tonight in the bar. I may have underrated the Cuse. From my vantage point it was tough to tell who was doing what (Wes J might have had 5 or 25 for all I know) but one thing I could tell is the Orange point guard situation is in much better shape than I anticipated. Scoop Jardine looked great (how could I doubt a guy named Scoop?), and this kid Brandon Triche looked really good as well. He's going to be a star in two years.
- Gophers now up 41-26. Much better. I feel now like I can relax, and just get ready to watch Ohio State beat the piss out of the Gay Heels. Seriously. You watch.
- Speaking of basketball, I'm sure you're dying for an update on my college basketball fantasy league. I won't post the whole draft list, you can find the earlier picks in some other posts, but here is an update since I last posted:
8.12 DWG - Damian Johnson, F, Minnesota
9.1 DWG - Edwin Ubiles, G/F, Siena
9.2 TLEF - TaJuan Porter, G, Oregon
9.3 NotoriousTREJetBrit - Rotnei Clarke, G, Arkansas
9.4 Saintfool - Theo Robertson, G/F, Cal
9.5 Aerial Assault - Matt Bouldin, G, Gonzaga
9.6 WuBanger - Jason Love, C, Xavier
9.7 Truck - Herb Pope, F, Seton Hall
9.8 Jeter23 - Austin Freeman, G, Georgetown
9.9 Tar Heel Boy - Mike Tisdale, C, Illinois
9.10 BasketballCoach - Avery Bradley, G, Texas
9.11 Tobias Funke - Armon Johnson, G, Nevada
9.12 Balco - Vernon Macklin, F/C, Florida
10.1 Balco - Elias Harris, F, Gonzaga
10.2 Tobias Funke - Michael Dunigan, C, Oregon
10.3 Basketball Coach - Klay Thompson, G, Washington St.
10.4 Tar Heel Boy - William Buford, G, Ohio St.
10.5 Jeter23 - Scotty Hopson, G, Tennessee
10.6 Truck - Malcolm Lee, G, UCLA
10.7 WuBanger - Durrell Summers, G, Michigan St.
10.8 Aerial Assault - Ekpe Udoh, F/C Baylor
10.9 Saintfool - Raymar Morgan, F, Michigan St.
10.10 NotoriousTREJetBrit - Bo Spencer, G, LSU
10.11 TLEF - Nolan Smith, G, Duke
10.12 DWG - Jordan Crawford, G, Xavier
11.1 DWG - Brandon Paul, G, Illinois
11.2 TLEF - Joe Trapani, F, Boston College
11.3 NotoriousTREJetBrit - Eric Boateng, C, Arizona State
11.4 Saintfool - Landon Milbourne, F, Maryland
11.5 Aerial Assault - Ryan Rossiter, F, Siena
11.6 WuBanger - Tyler Roche, F, Boston College
11.7 Truck - Jimmy Butler, G/F, Marquette
11.8 Jeter23 - Storm Warren, F, LSU
11.9 Tar Heel Boy - Mike Singletary, F, Texas Tech
11.10 BasketballCoach - DeWayne Reed, G, Auburn
11.11 Tobias Funke - Dee Bost, G, Mississippi St.
11.12 Balco - John Jenkins, F, Vanderbilt
12.1 Balco - Chandler Parsons, F, Florida
12.2 Tobias Funke - Derwin Kitchen, G, Florida State
12.3 Basketball Coach - Mike Davis, F, Illinois
12.4 Tar Heel Boy - Marcus Ginyard, G, North Carolina
12.5 Jeter23 - Marshall Moses, F, Oklahoma St.
12.6 Truck - John Roberson, G, Texas Tech.
12.7 WuBanger -
12.8 Aerial Assault -
12.9 Saintfool -
12.10 NotoriousTREJetBrit -
12.11 TLEF -
12.12 DWG -
That gives me a team of:
G: Chris Warren - Ole Miss, Nic Wise - Arizona, Deonta Vaughn - Cincy, Jordan Crawford - Xavier, Brandon Paul - Illinois
F: Luke Harangody - Notre Dame, Tyler Smith - Tennessee, Damian Johnson - Minnesota, Edwin Ubiles - Siena
C: JaJuan Johnson - Purdue, Derrick Favors - Georgia Tech
I like it. Coming up, I'm hoping to get Ralph Sampson and Courtney Fortson. Sampson is even more valuable since centers are such a commodity, I probably should have taken him last round. I'm nervous because not only because of the rare good centers thing, but because I know team NotoriousTREJetBrit is from Minnesota, and was not happy when I picked DJ. Hopefully Ralphie slips by them, I'm going to be heartbroken if I miss out on Ralph.
Fortson is a risk because he's suspended right now, and actually I haven't looked into exactly why and that's probably something I should investigate before I pick him. But on stats alone, he would have gone at least two rounds earlier and probably more like four. If he cuts down on turnovers he'd be a fantasy, and real life, star. I'm willing to risk it, since I'm very solid at guard.
- Just heard on ESPN2 "The Big Ten is the deepest conference in America" right as they go into Penn State highlights. Oops (although I do happen to agree with that sentiment, except maybe the Big 12). I have no doubt I will write about this further on Monday. That's right Penn State, you officially suck. To give you a quick preview, Penn State was a 12 point (or so, I don't remember exactly) favorite, and my instinct said to bet Wilmington. Then I researched Wilmington, and switched to Penn State because UNCW sounded THAT bad.
- Now with 9 minutes to go, it's just 51-43 Gophers. I think they were like a 26 point favorite. This is disappointing. And so is this Ohio State game. Kyle Madsen over Dallas Lauderdale? Why would you make that call, especially against UNC and Ed Davis and Deon Thompson? No Lauderdale is in at least, but if they can avoid playing Madsen the rest of the game, it would be a good move.
- Now 17-11 UNC. P.J. Hill just scored. Barf.
- I just went to get ice and now suddenly it's 26-11 North Carolina. My prediction of Ohio State as a final four sleeper is suddenly looking like my "JP Losman will have a breakout year" call.
- Wow, the Gophers somehow managed to win 76-51, and snacks reminds me that it was a -24.5 spread. WE WIN!
- Wonderbaby is freaking awesome, by the way, thanks for asking. She can now count to four, and she was advanced enough in her gymnastics thing to skip a whole class, and is now tumbling with three year olds. She's 19 months. Suck it, every other baby. And she even likes yard work.
I'm totally winning.
- You want to know something completely bizarre? Do you remember Shane Mack's season in 1994? Absolutely, undoubtedly, an unreal year. He hit .333/.402/.564 with 15 dingers and outstanding defense. He was 7th in both average and slugging that year, just off the top 10 in OBP, and was 8th in OPS.
- With Allen Iverson released by Memphis there seems to be some kind of movement to villify his career. Hogwash, I say. Iverson is without a doubt one of the best players in NBA history. Do you realize the best teammates he ever had were a mostly-washed up Dikembe Mutombo, Aaron McKie, and Eric Snow? He basically took that Sixers team that made the finals there single-handedly. I will grant you that at this stage of his career I can't see a good fit for him. He's clearly not happy taking a backseat to youth (as seen by making his way out of Memphis), and what good, contending team would he fit with (Chicago, maybe?), but make no mistake, this guy was one of the greats. If anybody ever goes on some "selfish" or "not a winner" rant, kindly bunch said person in the neck. If charges are pressed, I'll take the rap.
- Ohio State is depressing me. I'm about two seconds away from switching the NBA (*gasp*).
- Ok, nice try to keep me interested by Larry Drew. He gave a forearm shiver to noted douchebag P.J. Hill and absoultely flattened him on his dumb ass. I'll stick around for a while to see if anything comes of it. I feel like a hockey fan all of a sudden, but far less dumb.
- Far, far, far, far, far, far, far less.
- They just said Justin Watts hit a three. Since I've never heard of him, I'm switching to the NBA. Lakers/Bulls. Bulls ++9.5, OVER 195, and first quarter over 49.5. My Ohio State = Memphis call is just dumb now. Ohio State = Rice is more like it.
- Dear god these NBA guys are terrible, especially Derrick Rose. He can't shoot a jumper for shit, like, T.J. Ford style, and it's like he's too lazy or disinterested to get into the lane. He's on my fantasy team, and I was all like "Dude I have Rose" and "Derrick Rose is on my team, brah" and stuff, but now I'm just ashamed. I almost want to just break the TV so I don't watch any of these games.
- Ugh, these games are depressing. You know what's not depressing though (besides Audrina)? The NBDL draft, which I promised I would get to. So let's look.
- Nevermind for a minute, just got a text from snacks that OSU cut it to 2 with 11 seconds left. That is confirmed. Unreal. How does that happen? Kind of wish I had kept watching now.
- Well that was anti-climactic, and didn't cover the +2 either. Kind of wish I hadn't switched back over.
- Back to the NBDL - first overall pick, Carlos Powell. Second - Donell Taylor. Third - Deron Washington. Huh. this is a lot less fun than expected. I know Powell was either at Texas Tech or South Carolina, and I think Washington played for Arkansas or Mississippi or someone like that, but this is just lame. Let's just pick and choose a few highlights (or lowlights) instead, and go with my favorite pick of each round (they do 8 rounds of this garbage):
1st: Latavious Williams, high school. High school. How do you think that's working out? This is even more inexplicable since the NBA has that one-year in college rule. So did this guy think the NBDL was the path to fame and fortune? Did he sign somewhere but couldn't qualify for whatever reason and decided this was a better back up plan than JuCo? Honestly, I'd look it up but I'm pretty drunk. If you're bored at work - and you know damn well you are right now - you could go ahead and post any relevant info in the comments section below this post. RUNNER UP: JamesOn Curry. I'm 99% sure this guy has NBA experience already with the Bulls. Do they even have rules in this thing?
2nd: Mustafa Shakur, Arizona. Yep, pretty clear there are no rules. This guy was a second rate PG back in what I swear must have been the 90s for Arizona. Actually I just looked it up and he graduated in 2007, so who am I thinking of? Arizona has basically run a bevy of mediocre point guards through that program who get hyped because it's Arizona. They're pretty interchangeable. RUNNER UP: John Bryant, Santa Clara. If I had known Shakur wasn't whoever it is that I thought it is, this guy would be my choice. Being large and uncoordinated gets you riches these days? Actually, I guess Greg Ostertag perfected it. Did you know Mrs. W will see a large, uncoordinated white guy playing on a basketball team and say, "Is that their Ostertag?" True story.
3rd: Chris Lowe, UMASS. Not because it's a bad pick or anything, because Lowe was actually a pretty damn good point guard for the minutemen last year, and him being gone is a big reason why they're a big ball of suck now. The funny part is on the NBDL website they have no link to him. Yet they have links for Kevin Goffney, Sean Barnette, James Cripe, and Cecil Brown - guys I haven't even come close to knowing who they are. I'm not some expert (NOTE: I am), but four dudes I've never heard of get a link and no Chris Lowe? That ain't right. RUNNER UP: All those weirdos.
4th: Jason Richards, Davidson. Just stop. You know what I saw while watching basketball tonight? Gerry McNamara as a grad assistant on Jim Boeheim's bench. And that's awesome. Guess what white point guard guy? You aren't making the NBA. Take a page for G-Mac, and try to become a coach. Go the Jeff Capel route. It works. RUNNER UP: Leemire Goldwire. This is beyond weird.
5th: Shagari Alleyne, Kentucky. Remember when Kentucky, and I think it was Tubby, actually, recruited Alleyne and someone named like Lukasz Orbzut and they were both 7-2 and were going to be all twin tower and such? Nice plan. And this guy is still getting chances based on his height. Not fair, Jeff Hagen, not fair. RUNNER UP: Scooter McFagdon, whose name is funny, whose potential was unlimited, and whose disappointingness is complete. Also want to give a shout out to Joe Darger of UNLV here, whose name is nearly identical to a kid I knew in high school and never fails to make me giggle.
I just want to mention here that I went to go get a couple beers (NOTE: Silos running low) before the bar closed and on the elevator back up some cougar lady asked me "So what are you doing, want to go back down and get a drink?" I demurred. But I want to mention it here anyway.
6th: CJ Anderson, Xavier (via Manhattan). This guy WILL be in the NBA at some point. Maybe it's not for long, maybe it's a cup of coffee, but he will get a shot. You watch, I'm predicting he leads the NBDL in scoring, which I just realized I'm using as a high end compliment. Whatever. This dude is awesome. RUNNER UP: J'Nathan Bullock, somewhere. I know I've heard this name before, because it never fails to make me laugh, but I can't remember why right now. Seriously, why my parents didn't just name me J'Nathan will haunt me to my dying day.
Just realized my flight tomorrow is at 11:20, not 11:00. That's 20 extra minutes of sleep. Time to get more drunker.
7th: Garrison Carr, American. This guy was awesome for them. But was his career more, or less, successful than Tasheed Carr? That's one to think on. RUNNER UP: Rodney Alexander, no clue. I don't know who this is, but that's a hell of an NBA name.
8th: Lawrence McKenzie, Minnesota. You probably know who this is. Hey, whatever works. No doubt he'll grind out a career in Europe making more than I could possibly dream of by playing basketball. I do have a hint for him: look to New Zealand, it seems any mediocre former Gopher can make a nice living over there. Plus, outside the Aborigines, he'd probably be the only black dude over there, and that's got to be an advantage. RUNNER UP: A.J. Ratliff, Indiana. Senior Year = 1.7 pts, 1.3 rebs, 0.6 assists per game. This folks, is the NBDL.
- Lastly I want to close with something snacks sent me since apparently he doesn't do any work. This here from Peter Gammons, the jesus of baseball analysts (sorry Aaron). He mentions that Joe Mauer hit just one infield popup the entire season. Sound ridiculouly hyperbolic? Well, he is wrong. Mauer actually hit two. That means he popped up 1.5% of the time, fourth best in major league baseball (behind ryan howard, derek jeter - puke, and joey votto - stud). I find the fact that we are privy to this info fascinating. Common DWG whipping boy/stud, depending on who you ask, was 9th at 2.1%, pretty good. But I know what you're waiting for, you want to know Twins, don't you you provincial son of a bitch?
Well, I know one guy who is going to enjoy this, but guess who was fifth worst in the majors in popping up?
It was Mike Cuddyer. He popped up 15.5% of the time. That is awful. But let's look at something a little more for just a minute. Let's assume that all fly balls and ground balls at least have a chance at getting the team closer to scoring a run, where popups and strikeouts don't. Cuddy also strikes out 20% of the time. That means that 36% of the time he is at the plate, his results have no chance of doing anything good. That seems high. this feels like the kind of thing I should research further, so somebody remind me because I'm going to bed.
I really hate New jersey.
Friday, August 21, 2009
Welcome to Minnesota, Pete Rose! (and then Twins)
7:00 - Well he's here, the Pete Rose of football. I'm glad he's here because I think he gives the Vikes the best chance to do more than limp to an NFC Central title and a first round bounce, but I still hate him. In any case he's here, and like all the rest of you ass clowns, I can't help it but I need to get a look at this. So why not blog it? Also, Mrs. W is super annoyed right now. She doesn't like football, hates Favre, and especially hates the preseason because there shouldn't be football in August. Plus, I never watch the preseason, ever, so this is extra irritating right now. I might have to watch something like Mona Lisa Smile to get back in her good graces after this. I hope you're freaking happy.
7:03 - The superlatives are flying.
7:04 - This commercial with Paul Allen "announcing the couple" bringing their couch inside their house, and then they pull the sheet off and it's a Vikings couch? It needs to go. It's embarrassing. And does anybody else thing PA is just a little too into his job. Jesus, dude, relax. He's going to have a heart attack within three years. I won't miss him.
7:06 - Percy Harvin and Favre shake hands, right as the camera is zoomed in on them. Yeah, that's not contrived.
7:07 - Sideline chick (note: not hot) has her microphone not work when they go to her for a story that was presumably about Favre and Booty, since they showed their pictures. Nice job ABC. This is why you lost your NFL contract. Well, actually it was because of money, but still.
7:09 - Vikes start on D, and force major pressure on Cassel two of the three downs and stuff old ass Larry Johnson on second down. Of course, Cassel still manages to find the world' s fattest, slowest, whitest tight end for 12 yards and a first down.
7:11 - Chiefs fumble, Vikes recover. Good defense. Of course, when KC refuses to throw the ball to one of the best receivers in football (Dwayne "the Show" Bowe) that'll happen. By the way, if you don't think Bowe is having a huge year, you really need to axe somebody.
7:14 - Favre's first pass attempt as a Vike: attempted two yard dump to some dumbass fullback - two feet in front of him, incomplete. Freakin' Tavaris could have done that. My football wang remains flaccid.
7:15 - Third and eight. Favre completes to Harvin (Favrin?) but shy of the first down by a half yard. That looks really familiar. They go for it on foruth down and AP gets stuffed. Chefs ball. I don't know, I would have put in Chester Taylor right there. Or ran a half back pass.
7:19 - In all seriousness though, do you realize that with Brett Favre at QB Thomas Jones led the AFC in rushing last season. Thomas Jones. T-Jones. Yes, that one. I'm serious. I'm not making this up. No, I will not shut up. Yeah, I'd put the over/under for AP yards this season at about 2,800.
7:21 - Catch Dwayne Bowe! Thirteen yards and another KC Chief.....FIRST DOWN!!!!
7:24 - Challenged by the Vikes, overturned. What do you think the combined IQ of the coaches of the Twins and Vikings is? Dawger + Super Sioux Fan level?
7:25 - The Twins are already down 1-0. Of course they are.
7:27 - Field goal, and it's 3-0 Chiefs. The Royals are about one hit away from having that same lead on your precious Twins and Nick Blackburn. Wow. Twins/Royals. Vikings/Chiefs. What a night to be alive.
7:30 - After a fake reverse kick return by Percy (which I admit got me kind of excited) we see Favre running back out for another series. Announcer guy definitely has a boner. I remain unmoved.
7:31 - I hate to divulge secrets when I know many of my fantasy golf leaguemates read this blog, but I have to just tell you that I know who is going to win the Fed Ex Cup: Padraig Harrington. Book it.
7:32 - If the Twins get beat by Luke Hochevar I quit. He doesn't even bend his hat brim. And he's white. Christ.
7:33 - Favre throws one about five thousand miles an hour, but misses the receiver by approx. 100 feet. Announcer guy wants us to know, "I'm ok with that. That should be a completion once the QB and receiver get to know each other." I can't wait until they're still saying that in week 9.
7:34 - Big time blitz not picked up. Instead of eating the ball, Favre tosses it up randomly like you would do in Madden when you're facing Engage 8 (unless you're the Colts). Luckily it just harmlessly hits the ground. These two series were super unfulfilling. I have to watch Mona Lisa Smile for this?
7:35 - Oh god the chin strap thing! Maybe nothing has annoyed me more over the years than Favre's constant need to unhook his chin strap the second the play is over - every. single. time. And now I have to root for that guy. I didn't realize how hard this would be.
7:39 - Bad thing number two, as I once again listen to the announcer say things like, "Man, Favre is down there talking football with Berrian, I want to be down there" - the constant, constant, constant, overstated praise of Favre, not matter what the situation actually is. I don't know that I can handle this. Also the defense seems to be sacking Cassel a lot, which I think is good.
7:42 - T-Jax in. At least he can't be worse than Favre.
7:44 - Ok, he was worse. He just scrambled, ran five yards passed the line of scrimmage, and then threw a pass. Oh, sure, the receiver was open. That'll happen when you run where the linebackers used to be before you toss the ball. My god. It's time to cut bait.
7:48 - Another Royal ding-dong. Blackburn sucks and so do the Twins. I can't do this anymore.
8:40 - I'm back. Did you miss me? BB Gun decided to start throwing BBs, and somehow the Twins scratched out three runs against this year's Pedro Martinez, and we're all tied at 3-3 heading to the 7th.
8:41 - Cuddyer whiffs on three pitches, the last being a slider so far outside and so far in the dirt that a retarded monkey with a hairlip wouldn't have gone after it. That dude is driving me crazy.
8:44 - According to Coomer the ball Crede just hit, "Would have been out of here if he hadn't hit it in August." What. The. Eff.
8:47 - They're forcing Ragarm McTiredarm out there for the bottom of the seventh because everybody in the bullpen (save Nathan) is currently icing their arms thanks to this starting rotation. I'm expecting bad things.
8:56 - T-Jax is 9-11 for 117 yards and a touch? I almost wish I had kept watching.
Almost.
8:59 - Well I was wrong. Still tied, top o' eight on it's way.
9:04 - Casilla bunts Gomez over to second after Gomez got on first somehow. I'm not sure, I wasn't paying attention. In any case, here is a spot I actually agree with a sac bunt. I generally agree with a sac bunt most times when it's used properly. When Gardy has Cabrera sac bunt in the first, however, is where we have problems.
9:10 - Twins take the lead on a Span single and the worst throw I've ever seen from the KC center fielder. Also the remote control is missing.
9:12 - Tavaris is now 12-15 for 202 yards and 2 touchdowns. I almost wish I had been watching to see how this was possible.
9:16 - Yeah, you go ahead and walk Mauer to face Kubel. Let's see how that works.
9:18 - Dammit.
9:21 - I FOUND THE REMOTE!!!!!
9:25 - Dwayne Bowe had a TD today. Expect to hear that about 16 times this season.
9:29 - The Guerrier/Mijares combo works how it was supposed to all year (including a pick offed runner at first), and we head to the ninth with the Twinks still up a point.
9:30 - Did Strasburg end up signing with the Nationals? Jesus I don't even know. Hold on.
9:31 - Yep, four years, 15.1 million. Everything I've heard says he could pitch now. I'm assuming the Nats will at least hold off until next season, but I'm looking forward to seeing this kid. Hopefully he doesn't follow in Mark Prior's foot steps.
9:34 - It's bizarre to me that Cuddyer just struck out. I mean, this is equivalent to striking out Joe Sewell.
9:35 - Crede flies out to center. I'm guessing if it wasn't August that ball is gone.
9:36 - Del-Money hits like he usually does, and we go bottom (like your mom). Nathan on. I'm struggling to stay interested.
9:42 - Nathan struggling to handle Teahen of all people. This doesn't bode well. I'm predicting extra innings.
9:43 - Teahen grounds out. This whole thing with Calipari is kind of garbage, to be honest. Suddenly Memphis is not only vacating it's most succesful season ever, but is also on probation for the next there years (I haven't seen what this entails).
Say what you want about Calipari's culpability (I've heard excuses that neither Memphis or Cal knew Rose cheated on the SAT), but this is the second time he's taken a team to the final four only to have that appearance stricken from the record books due to cheating - and yet once again he has escaped scott free.
Let's be honest here, the guy is dirty as all hell, he's just been pretty good about staying ahead of the law. Kentucky is the perfect place for him. Those rednecks will do everything they can to cover for him. Marriage made in heaven.
Oh yeah. Rose took his fraudulent SAT test in Detroit. He's from Chicago. A lot easier to have someone take a test for you in a state you aren't from. I have a very hard time believing Calipari didn't know this.
9:47 - Someone named Brian Pena (related to Tony? I don't know) just tied the game. Told you Nathan didn't have it. I suppose when your team gets you a save chance once every month you probably get a bit rusty.
9:50 - Coomer (is this even Coomer? I'm just guessing. Where's Bert? What's happening?) goes with the "the ball doesn't carry in August" angle again as some guy I've never heard of almost wins the game with a ball that only goes off the wall. You know, that might possibly even be a true thing, but when I hear some jackass just popping off on a broadcast, I need a little more than anecdotal evidence. And now we head to extras. Brian Pena is a dickweed.
9:56 - Oh good, Soria is in. The new Mariano Rivera. Assuming he goes two innings, no chance the Twins could possibly win this until the tenth. And they just showed Jesse Crain warming in the Twins' pen. This couldn't be more over.
9:59 - Casilla bloop, Cabrera bloop misplayed by Willy freaking Bloomquist and the Twins go back on top. Horseshoe up ass kind of stuff going on here.
10:00 - Another intential walk of Mauer. Don't let me down Kubes.
10:06 - Oh, I forgot to mention that he let me down. Nathan still pitching. One out, one on.
10:14 - Two runners on with nobody out, and Alberto Callaspo has fouled off about six straight two strike pitches. There's no way he should still be in there. Nathan doesn't have it tonight, and we saw he didn't have it last inning. I know what you're thinking, "Who else could they put in?" and I have no idea, but it's clear Nathan is not on his game tonight. And Callaspo fouled off two more pitches while I was typing that. This is ridiculous.
10:18 - Joe Nathan has thrown 48 pitches. Joe Nathan has thrown 48 pitches. JOE NATHAN HAS THROWN 48 PITCHES. Ok, 49 now. Great job Gardy.
10:20 - Fifty.
10:21 - I can't find a website where I can get pitch counts by game, but I'm willing to wager my house that this is the most pitches Nathan has ever thrown in a game as a Twin, and I would almost bet it's the most a closer has thrown since the early 80s, or at least towards the top of that list.
10:22 - 52
10:23 - Line out. Twins win. Nathan's arm probably shot. Not that it matters. This season is a dick.
7:03 - The superlatives are flying.
7:04 - This commercial with Paul Allen "announcing the couple" bringing their couch inside their house, and then they pull the sheet off and it's a Vikings couch? It needs to go. It's embarrassing. And does anybody else thing PA is just a little too into his job. Jesus, dude, relax. He's going to have a heart attack within three years. I won't miss him.
7:06 - Percy Harvin and Favre shake hands, right as the camera is zoomed in on them. Yeah, that's not contrived.
7:07 - Sideline chick (note: not hot) has her microphone not work when they go to her for a story that was presumably about Favre and Booty, since they showed their pictures. Nice job ABC. This is why you lost your NFL contract. Well, actually it was because of money, but still.
7:09 - Vikes start on D, and force major pressure on Cassel two of the three downs and stuff old ass Larry Johnson on second down. Of course, Cassel still manages to find the world' s fattest, slowest, whitest tight end for 12 yards and a first down.
7:11 - Chiefs fumble, Vikes recover. Good defense. Of course, when KC refuses to throw the ball to one of the best receivers in football (Dwayne "the Show" Bowe) that'll happen. By the way, if you don't think Bowe is having a huge year, you really need to axe somebody.
7:14 - Favre's first pass attempt as a Vike: attempted two yard dump to some dumbass fullback - two feet in front of him, incomplete. Freakin' Tavaris could have done that. My football wang remains flaccid.
7:15 - Third and eight. Favre completes to Harvin (Favrin?) but shy of the first down by a half yard. That looks really familiar. They go for it on foruth down and AP gets stuffed. Chefs ball. I don't know, I would have put in Chester Taylor right there. Or ran a half back pass.
7:19 - In all seriousness though, do you realize that with Brett Favre at QB Thomas Jones led the AFC in rushing last season. Thomas Jones. T-Jones. Yes, that one. I'm serious. I'm not making this up. No, I will not shut up. Yeah, I'd put the over/under for AP yards this season at about 2,800.
7:21 - Catch Dwayne Bowe! Thirteen yards and another KC Chief.....FIRST DOWN!!!!
7:24 - Challenged by the Vikes, overturned. What do you think the combined IQ of the coaches of the Twins and Vikings is? Dawger + Super Sioux Fan level?
7:25 - The Twins are already down 1-0. Of course they are.
7:27 - Field goal, and it's 3-0 Chiefs. The Royals are about one hit away from having that same lead on your precious Twins and Nick Blackburn. Wow. Twins/Royals. Vikings/Chiefs. What a night to be alive.
7:30 - After a fake reverse kick return by Percy (which I admit got me kind of excited) we see Favre running back out for another series. Announcer guy definitely has a boner. I remain unmoved.
7:31 - I hate to divulge secrets when I know many of my fantasy golf leaguemates read this blog, but I have to just tell you that I know who is going to win the Fed Ex Cup: Padraig Harrington. Book it.
7:32 - If the Twins get beat by Luke Hochevar I quit. He doesn't even bend his hat brim. And he's white. Christ.
7:33 - Favre throws one about five thousand miles an hour, but misses the receiver by approx. 100 feet. Announcer guy wants us to know, "I'm ok with that. That should be a completion once the QB and receiver get to know each other." I can't wait until they're still saying that in week 9.
7:34 - Big time blitz not picked up. Instead of eating the ball, Favre tosses it up randomly like you would do in Madden when you're facing Engage 8 (unless you're the Colts). Luckily it just harmlessly hits the ground. These two series were super unfulfilling. I have to watch Mona Lisa Smile for this?
7:35 - Oh god the chin strap thing! Maybe nothing has annoyed me more over the years than Favre's constant need to unhook his chin strap the second the play is over - every. single. time. And now I have to root for that guy. I didn't realize how hard this would be.
7:39 - Bad thing number two, as I once again listen to the announcer say things like, "Man, Favre is down there talking football with Berrian, I want to be down there" - the constant, constant, constant, overstated praise of Favre, not matter what the situation actually is. I don't know that I can handle this. Also the defense seems to be sacking Cassel a lot, which I think is good.
7:42 - T-Jax in. At least he can't be worse than Favre.
7:44 - Ok, he was worse. He just scrambled, ran five yards passed the line of scrimmage, and then threw a pass. Oh, sure, the receiver was open. That'll happen when you run where the linebackers used to be before you toss the ball. My god. It's time to cut bait.
7:48 - Another Royal ding-dong. Blackburn sucks and so do the Twins. I can't do this anymore.
8:40 - I'm back. Did you miss me? BB Gun decided to start throwing BBs, and somehow the Twins scratched out three runs against this year's Pedro Martinez, and we're all tied at 3-3 heading to the 7th.
8:41 - Cuddyer whiffs on three pitches, the last being a slider so far outside and so far in the dirt that a retarded monkey with a hairlip wouldn't have gone after it. That dude is driving me crazy.
8:44 - According to Coomer the ball Crede just hit, "Would have been out of here if he hadn't hit it in August." What. The. Eff.
8:47 - They're forcing Ragarm McTiredarm out there for the bottom of the seventh because everybody in the bullpen (save Nathan) is currently icing their arms thanks to this starting rotation. I'm expecting bad things.
8:56 - T-Jax is 9-11 for 117 yards and a touch? I almost wish I had kept watching.
Almost.
8:59 - Well I was wrong. Still tied, top o' eight on it's way.
9:04 - Casilla bunts Gomez over to second after Gomez got on first somehow. I'm not sure, I wasn't paying attention. In any case, here is a spot I actually agree with a sac bunt. I generally agree with a sac bunt most times when it's used properly. When Gardy has Cabrera sac bunt in the first, however, is where we have problems.
9:10 - Twins take the lead on a Span single and the worst throw I've ever seen from the KC center fielder. Also the remote control is missing.
9:12 - Tavaris is now 12-15 for 202 yards and 2 touchdowns. I almost wish I had been watching to see how this was possible.
9:16 - Yeah, you go ahead and walk Mauer to face Kubel. Let's see how that works.
9:18 - Dammit.
9:21 - I FOUND THE REMOTE!!!!!
9:25 - Dwayne Bowe had a TD today. Expect to hear that about 16 times this season.
9:29 - The Guerrier/Mijares combo works how it was supposed to all year (including a pick offed runner at first), and we head to the ninth with the Twinks still up a point.
9:30 - Did Strasburg end up signing with the Nationals? Jesus I don't even know. Hold on.
9:31 - Yep, four years, 15.1 million. Everything I've heard says he could pitch now. I'm assuming the Nats will at least hold off until next season, but I'm looking forward to seeing this kid. Hopefully he doesn't follow in Mark Prior's foot steps.
9:34 - It's bizarre to me that Cuddyer just struck out. I mean, this is equivalent to striking out Joe Sewell.
9:35 - Crede flies out to center. I'm guessing if it wasn't August that ball is gone.
9:36 - Del-Money hits like he usually does, and we go bottom (like your mom). Nathan on. I'm struggling to stay interested.
9:42 - Nathan struggling to handle Teahen of all people. This doesn't bode well. I'm predicting extra innings.
9:43 - Teahen grounds out. This whole thing with Calipari is kind of garbage, to be honest. Suddenly Memphis is not only vacating it's most succesful season ever, but is also on probation for the next there years (I haven't seen what this entails).
Say what you want about Calipari's culpability (I've heard excuses that neither Memphis or Cal knew Rose cheated on the SAT), but this is the second time he's taken a team to the final four only to have that appearance stricken from the record books due to cheating - and yet once again he has escaped scott free.
Let's be honest here, the guy is dirty as all hell, he's just been pretty good about staying ahead of the law. Kentucky is the perfect place for him. Those rednecks will do everything they can to cover for him. Marriage made in heaven.
Oh yeah. Rose took his fraudulent SAT test in Detroit. He's from Chicago. A lot easier to have someone take a test for you in a state you aren't from. I have a very hard time believing Calipari didn't know this.
9:47 - Someone named Brian Pena (related to Tony? I don't know) just tied the game. Told you Nathan didn't have it. I suppose when your team gets you a save chance once every month you probably get a bit rusty.
9:50 - Coomer (is this even Coomer? I'm just guessing. Where's Bert? What's happening?) goes with the "the ball doesn't carry in August" angle again as some guy I've never heard of almost wins the game with a ball that only goes off the wall. You know, that might possibly even be a true thing, but when I hear some jackass just popping off on a broadcast, I need a little more than anecdotal evidence. And now we head to extras. Brian Pena is a dickweed.
9:56 - Oh good, Soria is in. The new Mariano Rivera. Assuming he goes two innings, no chance the Twins could possibly win this until the tenth. And they just showed Jesse Crain warming in the Twins' pen. This couldn't be more over.
9:59 - Casilla bloop, Cabrera bloop misplayed by Willy freaking Bloomquist and the Twins go back on top. Horseshoe up ass kind of stuff going on here.
10:00 - Another intential walk of Mauer. Don't let me down Kubes.
10:06 - Oh, I forgot to mention that he let me down. Nathan still pitching. One out, one on.
10:14 - Two runners on with nobody out, and Alberto Callaspo has fouled off about six straight two strike pitches. There's no way he should still be in there. Nathan doesn't have it tonight, and we saw he didn't have it last inning. I know what you're thinking, "Who else could they put in?" and I have no idea, but it's clear Nathan is not on his game tonight. And Callaspo fouled off two more pitches while I was typing that. This is ridiculous.
10:18 - Joe Nathan has thrown 48 pitches. Joe Nathan has thrown 48 pitches. JOE NATHAN HAS THROWN 48 PITCHES. Ok, 49 now. Great job Gardy.
10:20 - Fifty.
10:21 - I can't find a website where I can get pitch counts by game, but I'm willing to wager my house that this is the most pitches Nathan has ever thrown in a game as a Twin, and I would almost bet it's the most a closer has thrown since the early 80s, or at least towards the top of that list.
10:22 - 52
10:23 - Line out. Twins win. Nathan's arm probably shot. Not that it matters. This season is a dick.
Sunday, April 19, 2009
Weekend Review
WHO WAS AWESOME
1. Jason Kubel. He had this spot locked up after hitting for the cycle on Friday, but decided to declare his awesomeness even further by collecting four more hits on Saturday. For the weekend he helped the Twins sweep the stupid Angels and stupid Torii Hunter, going 8-15 with five runs scored and seven driven in, but that two game stretch may have been the most dominant by a Twin since Kirby destroyed Milwaukee. Honestly, despite Kubel being awesome and my boy and all, he's one of the last Twins I'd pick as "cycle possible" due to his being slower than Kent Hrbek - and I mean Kent Hrbek right now. I'm not 100% sure that triple was legit, but what the scorekeeper says goes, so congrats to Kubel on being a total stud, and the clear third-best hitter on the Twins.
2. Zack Greinke. For those of you with long memories, and I'm guessing many of my long time pain-in-the-ass readers remember, I once downplayed Greinke as nothing more than a #3 starter. Well, if nothing else, at least I am willing to admit when I am wrong as I seem to be doing over and over again lately. Greinke won again on Saturday to run his record to 3-0 for the Royals by shutting out Texas, giving up seven hits and striking out 10 while walking nobody. He's been unhittable this year, with 20 scoreless innings to start the season, piggy-backing on his fourteen scoreless innings to end 2008. He's a big reason the Royals are suddenly on top of the AL Central. Did you know the Royals tried to make him a reliever in 2007? Good thing they changed their minds - for them, bad news for the division. He's going to be good for a long time. I definitely whiffed on this one.
3. Derrick Rose. Who holds the record for most points by a rookie in their playoff debut? Yep, Rose, who scored 36 in the Bulls OT upset win over the Celtics, which tied Kareem Abdul-Jabbar's record. Rose was completely unguardable, and abused Rondo like most Big Ten players abused Travis Busch, even passing up open jumpers in order to cross Rondo over like a bitch and get to the rim. Rose didn't just score 36 points, he did it efficiently by shooting 12-19 and contributed eleven assists in one of the more dominating performances I've seen, stealing home court advantage from the favored Celts. A couple of other interesting things from this series are the fact that Ray Allen wears TWO shooting sleeves, and apparently Vinny del Negro is an actual NBA coach. TWO SHOOTING SLEEVES.
4. Jeremy Hermida. The Marlins keep winning, and they keep finding different heroes. Opening week, it was Emilio Bonifacio, with Josh Johnson pitching like a Cy Young candidate. This weekend Johnson again took the hill, but didn't have his A game this time, giving up six earned runs in six innings pitched, and the Marlins headed to the ninth down three to the Nationals. No matter, as Jeremy Hermida decided he'd be the big nuts this time, and took world's shittiest closer Joel Hanrahan deep with two outs and two on to tie the game. A couple of innings later with the score still tied, Hermida came up again with two men on, and again went deep to give the Marlins a 9-6 lead and finishing the day with three hits and three runs to go with his six RBI, raising his season average to .316. Hermida had a very good year in 2007, but dropped off in 08, so far at least he's looked closer to his 2007 form, and has helped the Marlins to the best record in the bigs at 11-1, currently riding a seven game win streak. The best part of this, however, was the Nationals bullpen cleaning following the sweep, with them jettisoning three of their relievers, calling two washed-up retreads from the minors and signing Kip freaking Wells. Ouch.
5. Glen Perkins. Which Twins' pitcher did you really expect to take a big step forward this year? Probably Slowey or Liriano, maybe Baker? A few people I know really like Blackburn, but I don't know anybody who saw this coming from Perkins. I always thought he was more of a place holder for Mulvey or Swarzak or somebody, and was destined for the bullpen but, once again, it's looking like I'm wrong. Perkins has been incredible this year, going eight innings in all three starts so far, and hasn't given up more than two runs in any start, including yesterday when he went eight, giving up just four hits and one run - and actually looked even more impressive. It seems Perkins has learned how to pitch, and is currently leading Twins' starters with a 1.50 ERA and 0.83 WHIP. Little known fact: his middle name is Weston. Littler known fact: I actually know one other person with that middle name.
WHO SUCKED
1. Chien-Ming Wang. Yes, he's here again. I don't mean to keep writing about Wang, and I would be able to ignore it if he was just consistently bad, but he is somehow finding a way to get worse and worse with each time out, this time giving up eight runs and eight hits in just one and a third innings, and inflating his ERA to a stellar 34.50. None of the Yankee relievers who followed him were able to do much better, with Cleveland putting up 22 runs when the slaughter was over, but Wang's season has just been special so far. In his three starts, he's pitched a total of just six innings and has given up nearly five baserunners per inning with opponents hitting .622 against him. That's a .622 batting average, not slugging. This is, without question, one of the most stunning disintegrations I've ever seen. And I can't look away.
2. Jim Furyk. I am stunned that Furyk missed the cut this week at Harbour Town in the Verizon Classic, seriously stunned. Everything was setup for a Furyk win this week. He was coming off a good finish at the Masters, finishing in a tie for tenth, which showed he was playing good golf. He has a good track record at this course, with two runner-ups, a fourth, and a tenth in the last five times he played it. So what happens? He doesn't break 70, finishing at +3 thanks to a 74 on Thursday, and misses the cut. Makes no sense. Brian Gay, whose only career win was at the Mayakoba when all the good golfers are busy at the WGC Match Play, dominated this course with his worst round being a 67 and finishing at -20 for a win by 10 strokes. Washed up Lee Janzen put up a 65 and never-will-be Tim Petrovic managed a 68, but Furyk can't even last to the weekend? I don't get it.
3. B.J. Upton. My big breakout pick this year (I actually picked him as my AL MVP) Upton has, well, not really been around. He started the season on the disabled list recovering from shoulder surgery, and then yesterday he left the Rays' game after the second inning due to tightness in his quadricep. In between, he managed to squeeze in all of 23 at bats, picking up 5 hits (.217 average) and knock in one run. He still manages to tantalize, picking up six walks as well (.379 OBP) and steal three bases without getting caught. Upton is an epic talent, but this is starting to look like a possible modern day Mark Prior situation. I hope not. And yes, this is another player I told Bogart to draft in his fantasy draft. Sorry again good buddy, sorry again.
4. Arizona D-Backs Offense. It really reminds me of the Twins, but the D-Backs played three games against the San Francisco Giants over the weekend, and managed to score 0, 2, and 0 runs in the three games. Yes, a grand total of two runs in three games. They did face Tim Lincecum, maybe the best pitcher in baseball, and that's the game they got two runs (against the Bullpen, of course). Against fifty-year old Randy Johnson and someone named Jonathan Sanchez, they couldn't do anything, with RJ actually taking a no-hitter into the seventh. Details? Ok. Conor Jackson was 1-11. Mark Reynolds was 1-9. Stephen Drew was 2-12. Chris Young was 1-10. It seems losing Orlando Hudson and Adam Dunn has had a minor effect on a team that was already slightly offensively challenged last year. Even at 4-8 I still think they'll win their division, but then again, I'm still waiting for Justin Upton to break out, so what do I know?
5. Orlando Magic. I generally don't like the NBA. I get a little bit excited for the start of the season, but am bored by game #3 and honestly didn't watch a single game this year. But the playoffs are different. I actually like watching the playoffs, because the teams seem semi-interested and the quality of play goes way up. It was interesting watching the Magic blow an 18-point lead, including being up by 14 at the start of the fourth, to the Sixers, who won on an Andre Iguodala jumper with 2.2 remaining. It was just like watching a college team panic with a lead. The Magic saw the game slipping away, and instead of going to what works - getting the ball to Dwight Howard, they started chucking jump shots. Notorious ballhog Rashard Lewis chucked up a bunch of bricks. Hedo Turkoglu was just 2-8, and I think most of those misses were in the fourth. Skip to My Lou and Courtney Lee couldn't hit anything either. Meanwhile Dwight Howard, who was 11-13 on the game, got all of two shot attempts in the fourth, as the lead dwindled and dwindled and was ultimately lost, along with the game and home court advantage. Just like a panicky college team. Not like a college team: Orlando Magic Cheerleaders.
1. Jason Kubel. He had this spot locked up after hitting for the cycle on Friday, but decided to declare his awesomeness even further by collecting four more hits on Saturday. For the weekend he helped the Twins sweep the stupid Angels and stupid Torii Hunter, going 8-15 with five runs scored and seven driven in, but that two game stretch may have been the most dominant by a Twin since Kirby destroyed Milwaukee. Honestly, despite Kubel being awesome and my boy and all, he's one of the last Twins I'd pick as "cycle possible" due to his being slower than Kent Hrbek - and I mean Kent Hrbek right now. I'm not 100% sure that triple was legit, but what the scorekeeper says goes, so congrats to Kubel on being a total stud, and the clear third-best hitter on the Twins.
2. Zack Greinke. For those of you with long memories, and I'm guessing many of my long time pain-in-the-ass readers remember, I once downplayed Greinke as nothing more than a #3 starter. Well, if nothing else, at least I am willing to admit when I am wrong as I seem to be doing over and over again lately. Greinke won again on Saturday to run his record to 3-0 for the Royals by shutting out Texas, giving up seven hits and striking out 10 while walking nobody. He's been unhittable this year, with 20 scoreless innings to start the season, piggy-backing on his fourteen scoreless innings to end 2008. He's a big reason the Royals are suddenly on top of the AL Central. Did you know the Royals tried to make him a reliever in 2007? Good thing they changed their minds - for them, bad news for the division. He's going to be good for a long time. I definitely whiffed on this one.
3. Derrick Rose. Who holds the record for most points by a rookie in their playoff debut? Yep, Rose, who scored 36 in the Bulls OT upset win over the Celtics, which tied Kareem Abdul-Jabbar's record. Rose was completely unguardable, and abused Rondo like most Big Ten players abused Travis Busch, even passing up open jumpers in order to cross Rondo over like a bitch and get to the rim. Rose didn't just score 36 points, he did it efficiently by shooting 12-19 and contributed eleven assists in one of the more dominating performances I've seen, stealing home court advantage from the favored Celts. A couple of other interesting things from this series are the fact that Ray Allen wears TWO shooting sleeves, and apparently Vinny del Negro is an actual NBA coach. TWO SHOOTING SLEEVES.
4. Jeremy Hermida. The Marlins keep winning, and they keep finding different heroes. Opening week, it was Emilio Bonifacio, with Josh Johnson pitching like a Cy Young candidate. This weekend Johnson again took the hill, but didn't have his A game this time, giving up six earned runs in six innings pitched, and the Marlins headed to the ninth down three to the Nationals. No matter, as Jeremy Hermida decided he'd be the big nuts this time, and took world's shittiest closer Joel Hanrahan deep with two outs and two on to tie the game. A couple of innings later with the score still tied, Hermida came up again with two men on, and again went deep to give the Marlins a 9-6 lead and finishing the day with three hits and three runs to go with his six RBI, raising his season average to .316. Hermida had a very good year in 2007, but dropped off in 08, so far at least he's looked closer to his 2007 form, and has helped the Marlins to the best record in the bigs at 11-1, currently riding a seven game win streak. The best part of this, however, was the Nationals bullpen cleaning following the sweep, with them jettisoning three of their relievers, calling two washed-up retreads from the minors and signing Kip freaking Wells. Ouch.
5. Glen Perkins. Which Twins' pitcher did you really expect to take a big step forward this year? Probably Slowey or Liriano, maybe Baker? A few people I know really like Blackburn, but I don't know anybody who saw this coming from Perkins. I always thought he was more of a place holder for Mulvey or Swarzak or somebody, and was destined for the bullpen but, once again, it's looking like I'm wrong. Perkins has been incredible this year, going eight innings in all three starts so far, and hasn't given up more than two runs in any start, including yesterday when he went eight, giving up just four hits and one run - and actually looked even more impressive. It seems Perkins has learned how to pitch, and is currently leading Twins' starters with a 1.50 ERA and 0.83 WHIP. Little known fact: his middle name is Weston. Littler known fact: I actually know one other person with that middle name.
WHO SUCKED
1. Chien-Ming Wang. Yes, he's here again. I don't mean to keep writing about Wang, and I would be able to ignore it if he was just consistently bad, but he is somehow finding a way to get worse and worse with each time out, this time giving up eight runs and eight hits in just one and a third innings, and inflating his ERA to a stellar 34.50. None of the Yankee relievers who followed him were able to do much better, with Cleveland putting up 22 runs when the slaughter was over, but Wang's season has just been special so far. In his three starts, he's pitched a total of just six innings and has given up nearly five baserunners per inning with opponents hitting .622 against him. That's a .622 batting average, not slugging. This is, without question, one of the most stunning disintegrations I've ever seen. And I can't look away.
2. Jim Furyk. I am stunned that Furyk missed the cut this week at Harbour Town in the Verizon Classic, seriously stunned. Everything was setup for a Furyk win this week. He was coming off a good finish at the Masters, finishing in a tie for tenth, which showed he was playing good golf. He has a good track record at this course, with two runner-ups, a fourth, and a tenth in the last five times he played it. So what happens? He doesn't break 70, finishing at +3 thanks to a 74 on Thursday, and misses the cut. Makes no sense. Brian Gay, whose only career win was at the Mayakoba when all the good golfers are busy at the WGC Match Play, dominated this course with his worst round being a 67 and finishing at -20 for a win by 10 strokes. Washed up Lee Janzen put up a 65 and never-will-be Tim Petrovic managed a 68, but Furyk can't even last to the weekend? I don't get it.
3. B.J. Upton. My big breakout pick this year (I actually picked him as my AL MVP) Upton has, well, not really been around. He started the season on the disabled list recovering from shoulder surgery, and then yesterday he left the Rays' game after the second inning due to tightness in his quadricep. In between, he managed to squeeze in all of 23 at bats, picking up 5 hits (.217 average) and knock in one run. He still manages to tantalize, picking up six walks as well (.379 OBP) and steal three bases without getting caught. Upton is an epic talent, but this is starting to look like a possible modern day Mark Prior situation. I hope not. And yes, this is another player I told Bogart to draft in his fantasy draft. Sorry again good buddy, sorry again.
4. Arizona D-Backs Offense. It really reminds me of the Twins, but the D-Backs played three games against the San Francisco Giants over the weekend, and managed to score 0, 2, and 0 runs in the three games. Yes, a grand total of two runs in three games. They did face Tim Lincecum, maybe the best pitcher in baseball, and that's the game they got two runs (against the Bullpen, of course). Against fifty-year old Randy Johnson and someone named Jonathan Sanchez, they couldn't do anything, with RJ actually taking a no-hitter into the seventh. Details? Ok. Conor Jackson was 1-11. Mark Reynolds was 1-9. Stephen Drew was 2-12. Chris Young was 1-10. It seems losing Orlando Hudson and Adam Dunn has had a minor effect on a team that was already slightly offensively challenged last year. Even at 4-8 I still think they'll win their division, but then again, I'm still waiting for Justin Upton to break out, so what do I know?
5. Orlando Magic. I generally don't like the NBA. I get a little bit excited for the start of the season, but am bored by game #3 and honestly didn't watch a single game this year. But the playoffs are different. I actually like watching the playoffs, because the teams seem semi-interested and the quality of play goes way up. It was interesting watching the Magic blow an 18-point lead, including being up by 14 at the start of the fourth, to the Sixers, who won on an Andre Iguodala jumper with 2.2 remaining. It was just like watching a college team panic with a lead. The Magic saw the game slipping away, and instead of going to what works - getting the ball to Dwight Howard, they started chucking jump shots. Notorious ballhog Rashard Lewis chucked up a bunch of bricks. Hedo Turkoglu was just 2-8, and I think most of those misses were in the fourth. Skip to My Lou and Courtney Lee couldn't hit anything either. Meanwhile Dwight Howard, who was 11-13 on the game, got all of two shot attempts in the fourth, as the lead dwindled and dwindled and was ultimately lost, along with the game and home court advantage. Just like a panicky college team. Not like a college team: Orlando Magic Cheerleaders.
Monday, April 7, 2008
Championship Game
Predictions:
1. Memphis wins
2. Rose and CDR once again get to the rim over and over in transition, as Kansas has no answer.
3. As easily as Russell Westbrook scored on the Tigers Saturday night, Brandon Rush and Mario Chalmers will do the same as this game is dominated by the guards on both sides. Dozier, Dorsey, Taggart, Arthur, Kaun, and Jackson are relegated to mostly just rebounding and second chance points - expect possibly for Arthur who can get out and run and might be able to score on the break.
4. Cole Aldrich heads back to the bench and plays less than three minutes, if at all.
5. The game goes over the posted total of 148.5, and will be more like 160.
6. Will go pretty much down to the wire, with Memphis pulling ahead in the final minute to win 83-78.
7. Most Oustanding Player: Chris Douglas-Roberts
1. Memphis wins
2. Rose and CDR once again get to the rim over and over in transition, as Kansas has no answer.
3. As easily as Russell Westbrook scored on the Tigers Saturday night, Brandon Rush and Mario Chalmers will do the same as this game is dominated by the guards on both sides. Dozier, Dorsey, Taggart, Arthur, Kaun, and Jackson are relegated to mostly just rebounding and second chance points - expect possibly for Arthur who can get out and run and might be able to score on the break.
4. Cole Aldrich heads back to the bench and plays less than three minutes, if at all.
5. The game goes over the posted total of 148.5, and will be more like 160.
6. Will go pretty much down to the wire, with Memphis pulling ahead in the final minute to win 83-78.
7. Most Oustanding Player: Chris Douglas-Roberts
Sunday, April 6, 2008
Semifinal Review
Unfortunately, the location I was in yesterday during the games was not the most conducive to reviewing basketball, but I was still able to watch quite a bit and can give you some thoughts. I'm sure you're thrilled.
- I was wrong. Nobody can stop Derrick Rose. I've pretty much underrated him most of the year. No more. Despite the Jayhawks' athletic guards and good defense, they won't have an answer for Rose either. I would still take Beasley over him in the NBA draft, but you can't go wrong either way. Really depends on team needs, and for the Wolves I think Beasley is more what the need.
- That Memphis/UCLA game was a game for athletes, and nothing symbolized that more than CDR's dunk over Kevin Love, see below:
Except it wasn't really even over Love, because it didn't have to be. CDR (the athlete) had the body control and ability to swerve around him in mid-drive and hit the dunk anyway, while Love (the non-athlete) couldn't get there quite in time, and when he did was completely irrelevant to the play, other than trying to take a Chris Paulus-like dive. It pretty much symbolized the whole game. The guys who played well for UCLA were their best athletes Russell Westbrook and Luc Richard Mbah a Moute. I would put Collison in that athletic group too, but he couldn't get it going at all. Meanwhile guys like Shipp and Love struggled, and the Bruins had no answer on defense for CDR or Rose, or the Memphis fastbreak in general. Pretty much a thorough ass-kicking.
- I won $43 rolling dice with Theory, Dr. Acula, and Pee Wee. Go me.
- I don't know that I've ever seen a team play better than Kansas last night, particularly the opening 8 minutes in jumping out to a 33-10 lead. Offensively they were perfect, and defensively they were perfect. It was such a thorough beating that senior peon Jeremy Case even got to play in the first half.
- Cole Alrich is a beast. Played a season-high in minutes last night, scoring 9 points and grabbing 8 rebounds in the final four. Nice. That was his second highest scoring game of the year, and third highest in rebounds. More importantly, he smacked Hansbrough around and kept him off his game, helping to limit him to just thirteen shots while Ellington and Green kept chucking from the outside. They got hot for a bit and made a game of it, but taking away Hansbrough made the game an easy KU win. With Kaun and Jackson graduating this year, and Arthur probably 50/50 to enter the draft, Aldrich is going to be a key for the Jayhawks next year, and will be an absolute stud.
- Early Prediction: Kansas takes the final. But it's going to be a hell of a game.
- I was wrong. Nobody can stop Derrick Rose. I've pretty much underrated him most of the year. No more. Despite the Jayhawks' athletic guards and good defense, they won't have an answer for Rose either. I would still take Beasley over him in the NBA draft, but you can't go wrong either way. Really depends on team needs, and for the Wolves I think Beasley is more what the need.
- That Memphis/UCLA game was a game for athletes, and nothing symbolized that more than CDR's dunk over Kevin Love, see below:
Except it wasn't really even over Love, because it didn't have to be. CDR (the athlete) had the body control and ability to swerve around him in mid-drive and hit the dunk anyway, while Love (the non-athlete) couldn't get there quite in time, and when he did was completely irrelevant to the play, other than trying to take a Chris Paulus-like dive. It pretty much symbolized the whole game. The guys who played well for UCLA were their best athletes Russell Westbrook and Luc Richard Mbah a Moute. I would put Collison in that athletic group too, but he couldn't get it going at all. Meanwhile guys like Shipp and Love struggled, and the Bruins had no answer on defense for CDR or Rose, or the Memphis fastbreak in general. Pretty much a thorough ass-kicking.
- I won $43 rolling dice with Theory, Dr. Acula, and Pee Wee. Go me.
- I don't know that I've ever seen a team play better than Kansas last night, particularly the opening 8 minutes in jumping out to a 33-10 lead. Offensively they were perfect, and defensively they were perfect. It was such a thorough beating that senior peon Jeremy Case even got to play in the first half.
- Cole Alrich is a beast. Played a season-high in minutes last night, scoring 9 points and grabbing 8 rebounds in the final four. Nice. That was his second highest scoring game of the year, and third highest in rebounds. More importantly, he smacked Hansbrough around and kept him off his game, helping to limit him to just thirteen shots while Ellington and Green kept chucking from the outside. They got hot for a bit and made a game of it, but taking away Hansbrough made the game an easy KU win. With Kaun and Jackson graduating this year, and Arthur probably 50/50 to enter the draft, Aldrich is going to be a key for the Jayhawks next year, and will be an absolute stud.
- Early Prediction: Kansas takes the final. But it's going to be a hell of a game.
Saturday, April 5, 2008
Semifinal Saturday
Woo-hoo, the Final Four is here, and it should be a good one. Of course, two years ago I was in Vegas to watch, and this year I'll be at a BW3. Advantage: 2 years ago.
I'm still picking UCLA to take out Memphis and hold down Rose. Now, I don't mean hold down like 2 points, I mean more like going 4-14 with 12 points and a 1:1 TO/A ratio or worse. He's still going to get points, but he's also going to struggle. I will also go ahead and guarantee Dorsey is in foul trouble most of the game.
An interesting note on the second game is that Kansas plays at a lot slower tempo than I thought, ranking 132nd in the country in tempo compared to Carolina at 9th. I thought maybe it was a reflection on the Big 12, and it is a little bit as Kansas ranks fifth in the conference, but that doesn't completely explain my misperception, and they obviously don't run as much as I thought. I don't think a faster paces bothers them however, seeing as they were 16-1 in games where more than 145 points were scored. I'm also thinking it may be that they rank lower in tempo because they were in so many blowouts, where they slowed things down in the second half because they were up by so much. I'd love to see a first half vs. second half tempo split, but have no idea where to get that if it even exists. In any case, I'm still picking Kansas.
In Twins news, they picked up a good win over the previously undefeated Royals, but lost Cuddyer with a dislocated finger. I actually thought the Cuddy Bear would be tough and be back in a couple days, but he's already been put on the 15-day DL like a little whiny girl. I'm much less fond of Cuddy these days. This means we'll see more of Kubel (good), but also more of Monroe (bad). I don't know who they're calling up to take Cuddy's place, but chances are he really sucks.
I'm still picking UCLA to take out Memphis and hold down Rose. Now, I don't mean hold down like 2 points, I mean more like going 4-14 with 12 points and a 1:1 TO/A ratio or worse. He's still going to get points, but he's also going to struggle. I will also go ahead and guarantee Dorsey is in foul trouble most of the game.
An interesting note on the second game is that Kansas plays at a lot slower tempo than I thought, ranking 132nd in the country in tempo compared to Carolina at 9th. I thought maybe it was a reflection on the Big 12, and it is a little bit as Kansas ranks fifth in the conference, but that doesn't completely explain my misperception, and they obviously don't run as much as I thought. I don't think a faster paces bothers them however, seeing as they were 16-1 in games where more than 145 points were scored. I'm also thinking it may be that they rank lower in tempo because they were in so many blowouts, where they slowed things down in the second half because they were up by so much. I'd love to see a first half vs. second half tempo split, but have no idea where to get that if it even exists. In any case, I'm still picking Kansas.
In Twins news, they picked up a good win over the previously undefeated Royals, but lost Cuddyer with a dislocated finger. I actually thought the Cuddy Bear would be tough and be back in a couple days, but he's already been put on the 15-day DL like a little whiny girl. I'm much less fond of Cuddy these days. This means we'll see more of Kubel (good), but also more of Monroe (bad). I don't know who they're calling up to take Cuddy's place, but chances are he really sucks.
Saturday, January 26, 2008
Go Indiana!
Oops, sorry. Wrong Indiana team (by the way, if you want to know what The Sidler looks like, just picture that kid, aged about 5 years, with glasses).
Anyway, big game for the Hoosiers against UCONN today. Even though UCONN suspended a starting guard and his backup for the game, this still means a lot to Indiana, the Big Ten, and, by extension, the Gophers. The Hoosiers are ranked number 7 in the country, and really have gotten there more by not losing than by beating anybody. The only really good team they've played is Xavier, and they lost by 15. Their best wins are at home versus Kentucky and Georgia Tech - not exactly impressive. And while a win against UCONN wouldn't exactly be tip top quality, a loss would be devastating, and a blowout win would validate the team, and the conference.
Today's Card:
UCLA -16.5 @ Oregon State
San Fran +9 vs. St. Mary's
Temple +1 vs. St Joe's (P)
Cal +1 vs. Stanford
Minnesota +8 @ Ohio State
Purdue -1 vs. Wisconsin (W)
Memphis -12.5 vs. Gonzaga (L)
Villanova -2 vs. Notre Dame (L)
Texas A&M -1.5 @ Oklahoma State (W)
Washington +8.5 @ Arizona (L)
Indiana -9 vs. UCONN (L)
Yesterday: 2-1
Season: 252-230
I'll be back with thoughts on afternoon games as I watch them.
and I'm back:
- Memphis up 10-0 on Gonzaga with just 2 and a half minutes gone. Memphis super athletic, fast, and attacking. Gonzaga slow, white, unprepared. I'm sure they'll settle a bit and make a game of it, but right now this isn't even as close as 10-0.
- I haven't seen enough of Kansas to put them in here, but Memphis is a lot better than North Carolina, UCLA, Duke, Tennessee, or anybody else you want to throw in here.
- Derrick Rose is sick. Please, please let the Wolves get Rose.
- Wow. Give Gonzaga credit, as they just took the lead with two minutes left in the first half. I still think Memphis is the best team in the NCAA though, they seemed to lose interest a bit.
- Indiana looking good on the offensive boards, despite being very undersized to UCONN. That was the biggest concern for them I thought, and they're getting it done. DJ White is so much the man.
- Eric Gordon definitely knows he's on national TV. He's trying to do WAAAAAAAAAAY too much. He's no Derrick Rose.
- Here's why I hate myself sometimes. All year, and before the year even started, I said Villanova sucked. So today they were at home against Notre Dame, a team who has sucked on the road, in a game they really, really need, so I go ahead and take Nova -2. Well, ten minutes left and Notre Dame is up by 16. I need to stop overthinking.
- Gordon can't stop A.J. Price on the dribble. Didn't expect that.
- Girl scout just stopped by to sell cookies. I did not ask if they were made from real Girl Scouts. Pregnant wife commanded I order 8 boxes of thin mints, seems excessive. I also just realized that having a girl, which we are, means selling girl scout cookies. Which means walking around, talking to people, in the cold. Super.
- Indiana shooting 25% with four to go in the first half, after starting 3-3. If they don't turn it around in a hurry, expect a whole lot of "The Big Ten is Overrated", "The Big Ten Sucks", and "Should the Big Ten be a Mid-Major" stuff coming up.
- Indiana looks like absolute garbage. Down 29-24 at half, shooting less than 25%, falling into going one-on-one instead of running an offense, and getting killed on the boards. Embarrassing.
- Memphis pretty much has this one locked up, but they aren't going to cover, giving me a nice 0-2 start, and likely 0-3. I've gone deathly cold.
- I'm officially worried about Memphis in March due to their 58% free throw shooting as a team.
- Indiana down nine with fifteen to go. Let's see, they've stopped driving to the basket, they don't bother to pass into the paint, they don't really run an offense. They sit around passing around the perimeter and then chuck up a three or try a one-on-one move and shoot a fade away. I have money on them and care about the Big Ten and I'm pissed, I can't imagine how I'd feel if I was an actual Indiana fan. This is brutal.
- None of Indiana's guards can stop any of UCONN's guards, and UCONN is missing two of their top four guys. This is depressing.
- Absolutely, without question, the worst game I've seen played by anybody this year, as Indiana loses to UCONN 68-63, in a game that wasn't even that close. Complete and total embarrassment. I'd be shocked if Indiana even wins in the first round of the tournament this year. Be back later for Gophers game.
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