Fun with Nerd Stats

I was doing some work in Excel on my data and formulas for player props, and came across some interesting stats that I found interesting.  So look:

-  B.J. Upton is having an absolutely terrible year, and a big reason is pop-ups.  Upton has a major league worst 30.2% in-field fly ball rate with 13 pop-ups in 192 plate appearances, a big reason why his BABIP is so low at just .208.  Upton is also striking out 33.9% of the time, which means 64.1% of his plate appearances end with him having zero chance of getting on base.  So if every Upton ground ball and fly ball managed to find a hole and he hit 1.000 on those, he'd still only be hitting .360.  That's preposterous.  Also from a Twins' perspective Josh Willingham's pop-up rate of 22.4% and K rate of 26.4% are a pretty bad combo too.  He needs to get it together so they can trade him this summer for something halfway decent.

-   There are 8 players who have yet to pop out this year, and they range from slap hitters (Ruben Tejada, Jose Altuve, Howie Kendrick), awesome hitters (Joey Votto, Mike Trout), really shocking guys who you'd think popped out every five minutes (Ryan Howard), guys I've never heard of (Jason Castro), and asians (Shin-Soo Choo). 

-  The following players have more walks than strikeouts so far this year:  Dustin Pedroia, Coco Crisp, Marco Scutaro, and Norichika Aoki.  That is an epically annoying group of players.

-  Ervin Santana (13/13), Dan Haren (12/9), and Kevin Correia (13/12) are all contenders for the Bronson Arroyo Memorial Club of pitchers who give up more homers than walks in a season, but if anyone is a lock to join the group it's got to be Bartolo Colon with 7 homers and 4 walks allowed so far.  It seems he's decided to absolutely not walk anybody this year, and if history holds and he makes around 30 starts he should give up around 20 homers.  At his current walk rate he'll come in under that, but who knows if it will hold?  He's never walked this few batters in his career, but it seems to be working for him so far (3.33 ERA, 3.34 FIP).  Maybe even crazier?  He's only had a single 3-0 count this entire season.

-  Fastest average fastball velocity for any starter is Stephen Strasburg at 95.4 mph with the slowest 81.1 mph by R.A. Dicky (slowest non-gimmick pitcher FB is Barry Zito at 83.4).  Fastest average fastball period goes to Detroit's Bruce Rondon at 99.3 mph (Aroldis Chapman is fourth at 97.1).  Glen Perkins throws the fastest heater of any Twin at 94.5 mph, with the team's hardest throwing starter, Mike Pelfrey, averages 91.8 mph and every single thing I wrote in that last sentence is totally gross.

-  More Twins stuff:

• Best Fastball (by results/value):  Perkins
• Worst Fastball:  Pelfrey
• Best Curve: Ryan Pressly
• Worst Curve: Scott Diamond
• Best Slider: Pressly
• Worst Slider: Perkins
• Best Change-Up: Jared Burton
• Worst Change: Pedro Hernandez
• Casey Fien and Josh Roenicke also have very good cutters, while Vance Worley has one that is completely god awful
• Best Fastball Hitter: Joe Mauer (and it's not even close - he crushes fastballs - runnerup: Eduardo Escobar)
• Best Curveball Hitter:  Mauer (Trevor Plouffe)
• Best Slider Hitter: Josh Willingham (Plouffe)
• Best Change-Up Hitter: Mauer (Oswaldo Arcia)
• Most Aggressive Hitter: Wilkin Ramirez (runner up: Arcia)
• Best Eye:  Brian Dozier (Jamey Carroll)
• Best Baserunner:  Pedro Florimon (Aaron Hicks)
• Worst Baserunner: Plouffe (Chris Parmelee)
• Best Fielder: Justin Morneau (Florimon)
• Worst Fielder: Plouffe (Hicks - advanced stats have his range as terrible, advanced fielding stats still suck)

- Back to Majors in general, Pablo Sandoval, Adam Jones, and Alfonso Soriano are known hackers so it shouldn't be a surprise they're the most aggressive in the majors this year, while Marco Scutaro, Nate McLouth, and Coco Crisp win the most patient award (Hicks is fourth among those who qualify for the batting title).

-  Shin-Soo Choo completely crushes fastballs, Carlos Gomez (Snacks -> hi) kills the curve, while Chris Davis smokes sliders (Willingham is second here) and Evan Longoria owns the change-up (followed by Carlos Gonzalez and Troy Tulowitzki which is notable because all three are on $nake and I's fantasy team).  On the flip side, fastballs confuse Ruben Tejada, John Buck is owned by the curve, Nelson Cruz can't hit a slider, and Matt Wieters is always fooled by a change.

-  Lastly, the best heater in the bigs goes to Cliff Lee (Clayton Kershaw runner-up), best curve to Adam Wainwright (A.J. Burnett) - neither a big surprise, best slider belongs to Yu Darvish (Justin Masterson), best change to Marco Estrada (Cole Hamels), best cutter to Travis Wood (Clay Buchholz), and best splitter (people still throw this?) to Hisashi Iwakuma (Ryan Dempster) and no, not many people throw it.

Week in Review - 5/17/2010

 So I had this whole write up done for how the Twins suck and all that.  But I wrote it during the 7th inning of the game yesterday, and one swing of Jason Kubel's ample bat off Mr. Sandman erased all the bad feelings about this weekend.  We can now ignore Gardy's retarded use of Guerrier against A-Rod, Jesse Crain's inability to get anybody out (still), the fact that two of the spots in the lineup are going to be used by a combo of Brendan Harris, Nick Punto, Alexi Casilla, and Matt Tolbert, and the fact that the team is suddenly unable to get a big hit (save the Kubel slam).  But none of that matters, because the Twins went 1-2 in New York.  World Series, here we come.


WHO WAS AWESOME

1.  Stephen Strasburg.  Good lord, would you jerks just call this kid up to the bigs already?  After tossing 6-innings of 1-hit ball at AAA this week, he now has an ERA of 1.06 and a WHIP of 0.65 in his 7 minor league starts between AAA and AA.  He's faced a total of 125 batters, allowing just 22 to reach base on 14 hits and 8 walks, while striking out 40.  He's whiffed 3 batters for each one who gets a hit.  He's given up fewer hits than Jesse Crain in almost double the innings.  He has nothing left to prove in the minors, they're just keeping him down to try to save money down the line by keeping his service clock off, but at this point it's embarrassing.  They're just wasting his innings right now.  Although mark my words, if the Nationals stay in contention they won't make a trade around the deadline, they'll use the classic Twins line, "Calling him up is as good as a trade."  Classic Twins.

2.  Mike Leake.  Is it repetitive to put Leake in here week after week?  Maybe.  But do you know what else is repetitive?  His ability to get people out.  Again and again and again and again and again.  They seemingly keep him on a pitch count of right around 100, which is good for the rest of the league because nobody can hit this guy.  After a 6-inning, 4 hit, 2 run performance on Friday, he's now sitting at 4-0 with a 3.09 ERA, and he's just consistent as hell.  In his 7 career starts (all this year), he's never last less than 6 innings, never given up more than 8 hits, and has only given up more than 3 runs once.  And let's not forget this is a rookie who never played in the minors, just jumped straight to the Reds this year after being drafted last year.  He doesn't strike out a ton of guys so I don't know that he'll ever reach "superstar" status, but he will certainly be a star, and maybe already is. 

3.  Shane Victorino.  Thrust into the leadoff role for the Phils with Jimmy Rollins on the shelf, Victorino got off to a rough start this year.  And then we traded for him in fantasy.  And he is just destroying the ball.   In his five games this week, he had multiple hits in four of them.  And not just multiple hits, but a ton of extra bases as well.  In his 10-23 week, he picked up a double, a home run, and three triples and also walked three times.  He's always been a speed guy, thus the "Flyin' Hawaiian" nickname, but he's slugging the ball at an impressive .519 clip so far this year, which would be a career high, and already has 8 home runs against a career best of 14.  Perhaps a new nickname is in order.  This is where I'd put my suggestion but I can't come up with anything clever. 

4.  Adam Scott.  Welcome back Mr.  Scott.  After being one of the best young golfers on the tour a few years ago, to the point where he was known as the best golfer who hadn't won a major, a surfing accident (shark attack?) completely derailed him like that train from the Fugitive.  It got so bad at one point, that last season he missed the cut in 10 of his last 16 tournaments, and it was almost looking like he was basically done and might be heading towards David Duval land.  He had been looking better this year, making 6 of 8 cuts, and finally broke back through with a win at the Texas Open this weekend.  It wasn't exactly a top field, but there were enough good players there that this should be looked at as a huge positive step for Scott.  And between him and Aaron Baddeley finishing in third, it was quite the weekend for washed up young golfers.

5.  Young Pitchers.  Too many to name individually (not counting Leake, who is just a straight pimp).  Mat Latos tossed a one-hitter for the Padres.  So did Johnny Cueto for the Reds.  And speaking of Reds, the day after Cueto's gem Homer Bailey went the distance for a shut out.  Ricky Romero threw a complete game shutout, striking out 12, while Tommy Hanson struck out 10 in 7 innings.  Phil Hughes won his fifth game, as did David Price.  And someone named John Ely pitched a gem for the Dodgers in just his third major league start.   I don't know if it's a great era for young arms or just a weird week, but I've definitely noticed the youngsters this week.  You probably have too, perv.


WHO SUCKED

1.  LeBron.  I'm not going to belabour the obvious here when you can read 26,500 articles just by searching google for "LeBron James lackluster", but that was brutal.  Unless his elbow is far worse than anybody thinks, this was a shocking lack of effort and focus by someone who is thought as possibly the best player in the league.  On the other hand, he's only 25 (for real, I looked it up) and 25 years are prone to petulance.  I'm going to go ahead and not write him off just yet.  Seriously, if he wants to sign with the Wolves, I'm on board.  Smart money says the Nets, though.  Book it.

2.  Rich Harden.  Rich Harden is from Canada.  British Columbia, to be exact, the same province that gave us Kristin Kreuk (pictured), Jason Priestley, and Bryan Adams.  So you'd think that when he gets to pitch in his home country, like when he goes to Toronto, he'd be all amped up and be lights out.  Well, he might get amped up, but he sure as hell can't pitch for crap up in the great white north, and Friday's 2.2 inning, 4 hit, 6 walk, 7 run disaster in what has clearly become a trend at this point.  His other two career starts in Canada were nearly as bad.  In 2004, he went just 4 and 1/3 innings, giving up 7 hits and 7 runs, and in 2005 he gave up 5 hits and 6 walks in five innings, but escaped allowing just four runs.  So that means in his career his ERA is 13.50 in Canada.  Since Minnesota is basically Canada without the monopoly money and bigger fish, I'd say it's a good thing the Twins didn't sign him.

3.  Jason Bartlett.  Hey do you remember when Bartlett was thrown into the Delmon Young/Matt Garza trade and the only people who cared were the ladies who got all hot every time they looked at him because it looked like he was just going to be a mediocre shortstop?  And then remember last year when he hit .320 and stole 30 bases and showed some power and everyone was all angsty about how the team could let him go and blah blah blah?  Well, spaz, you can relax because he sucks again.  After going 3-23 this week, he's now hitting .236 on the year and isn't bothering to slug the ball even a little bit.  So it looks like the Twins got the better of the Harris/Bartlett part of that deal.  Suck it, Rays.

4.  Former Texas Open Winners.  Zach Johnson and Justin Leonard had combined to win the last 3 Texas Opens.  Back then it was played at La Cantera.  This year, they moved it to TPC San Antonio, and these two clowns apparently couldn't handle the long course, because they both missed the cut spectacularly.  Johnson fired an 80 in the first round that he couldn't recover from, which included a truly stunning six-putt after putting the ball on the green off the tee in one on 13, including three misses inside of three feet.  Justin Leonard wasn't quite as bad, but he also shit the bed in the opening round, posting a 76, and wasn't able to recover, which including a triple bogey after doinking his drive into the wilderness.  Excellent work, guys. 

5.  B.J. Upton.  Remember two years ago when I predicted Upton would be the MVP?  And remember this year, when I insisted that last year was just a down year and he'd be back and knocking the cover off the ball and all that?  Well it turns out I'm an idiot, because Upton just keeps sucking and sucking and is suddenly in danger of being benched.  He had a nice couple of games over the weekend after word came out that he was close to hitting the pine, including two doubles yesterday, but that still put him at just 4-18 for the week, and he's hitting just .119 in May and .225 for the year.  He has also lost his power, not having homered since April 19th, and isn't walking anymore either.  Last year he still had value even if he wasn't hitting because he would at least walk, so now that he's not hitting or walking, he's essentially worthless.  Let's just say it's pretty easy to decide who to bench to put Kubel back in the lineup.

Because Kubel is back, folks.  Hold on to your butts.

Weekend Review - 10/5/2009

Wow, who would have thought we'd be sitting here still stressing about the Twins even  four days ago?  Quite the run to tie it (I think they are on a 16-4 run right now) and a little help from the Tigers and we are back to last year all over again.  That was a fun game to watch yesterday, and the cheers from the crowd when the White Sox scored and the chants of "Let's Go White Sox" were great moments.  Glad I had the chance to go.  No, I won't be in attendance on Tuesday, but I will most definitely be watching.  Let's hope we get the good Baker, not the gopher ball one.



WHO WAS AWESOME

1.  Delmon Freaking Young.  What.  The.  Hell?  I have no idea what got into him, unless it was that little bean ball/I hate Mijares incident, but whatever it is keep it going.  Delmoney absolutely destroyed Kansas City in this three game set, going 6-13 with three home runs and 10 rbi and coming up with the biggest hit of the game in both games 1 (the grand slam) and game 2 (bases clearing double off Grienke) and then knocking out two homers yesterday.  To put his production this weekend in perspective, these three games representent about 3% of the games he's played in all year and he put up 25% of his season home run total and 17% of his RBI total this weekend.  Is he finally turning it around and showing the player everyone thought he would be coming into the league, or is this nothing more than a small sample size flash?  I don't care, just do it for one more game.


2.  Jason Kubel.  If Delmoney hadn't had such a monster series, we'd be talking about Kubel who is almost as hot right now.  In the three games against KC, he went 6-13 with 3 homers and 8 rbi - the big difference is we expect this from Kubel.  His three-run bomb in the first yesterday set the tone and took a whole ton of pressure off the rest of the team, and continued a season of utter dominance as he's now up over 100 rbi and a .300 batting average.  Seriously, this batting line:  .300/.369/.535 with 27 dingers, 35 doubles, and 102 ribi is just sick.  He has a better slugging percentage than Alex Rodriguez, a better on base percentage than Johnny Damon, a better average than Mark Texeira, more homers than Evan Longoria, Justin Morneau, and Derek Jeter.  Seriously, at this point anybody bashing Kubel is either completely retarded or just running a bit, because he really and truly has had an elite hitting season this year.

3.  Jacob Edward Peavy.  This is a repeat from last week, but how can I not include him again?  A week after completely shutting down the Tigers, he did it again, going eight innings this time, and giving up just 2 hits and 2 walks while striking out five and giving up no runs.  You can read my post last week and pretty much apply the whole thing this week.  Two interesting additional thoughts about Peavy, both supplied by Snacks this week.  First, how impressed should we really be by him shutting down the Tigers twice?  As snacky-boy said, Carl Pavano did it four freaking times.  Pavano is the definition of mediocre, so perhaps it isn't time to make sweet love to Peavy just yet - although I lean towards the fact that this guy is pretty good.  Second, Peavy doesn't miss a whole lot of bats, and that isn't a desirable trait in the AL.  He only threw four pitches that batters swung and missed at tonight.  For comparison sake, Manship had nine and even Jesse Crain had two.  That's not a good thing.  If the Sidler still read this blog and wrote for it, he could probably do this better than I.


4.  B.J. Upton.  Bossman Junior has driven me crazy this year, first being my preseason pick for MVP and then proceeding to alternate between being hurt and sucking all season long, but he finally played the way I expected him to all year this weekend.  He started off by hitting for the cycle and driving in six on friday, scored two runs without getting a hit on saturday, and .  The thing that drives me and probably actual Rays' fans crazy is that he has all the tools to be an MVP candidate, but his numbers have taken an inexplicable dip this year.  Batting average from .273 to .243, OBP from .383 to .312, SLG from .401 to .376.  It's even more dramatic looking at deeper metrics, his walk rate went from 15.4% to 8.9%, his line drive % went from 19% to 15.5%, and his fly balls up are 31% to 40% and he's suddenly swing at 20% of the balls he sees outside the strike zone, where he was at just 15% last year.  Perhaps most damning is that that last year his BABIP was a ridiculous .350, and now that he's at a more normal .315 his numbers are awful.  Is the Bossman just an average player?  My eyes say no, but my brain is starting to say a solid maybe.

5.  Hakeem Nicks.  It's unfortunate that he got hurt and had to miss three games, because it's allowed Eli to get cozy and snuggly with guys like Manningham and Steve Smith which might slightly slow down his quick ascent to the #1 WR on the Giants, but it's clear he's going to be a star.  They managed to get him in the game a bit this week and he responded with a 54-yard TD catch.  Is it safe to say he's the next Randy Moss?  Yes, I think it probably is.  


WHO SUCKED

1.  Miguel Cabrera.  Obviously losing two of three to Chicago and coughing up a 2 game lead with three to play means a whole lot went wrong for the Tigers, such as scoring one total run in the first two games, but supposed MVP candidate Cabrera really forgot to show up, going 0-11 for the series.  And it's not even so much 0-11, but how many opportunities he squandered.  Game 1, first inning two runners on and 1 out - Whiff.  Fourth inning, runner on nobody out - popup.  Ninth inning, runner on nobody out - popout.  Game 2, first inning, runner on two out - popup.  Third inning, runners on 2nd & 3rd, two outs - ground out.  Sixth inning, runner on one out - strikeout.  Eighth inning, two on, 1 out - double play.  Even in game 3 he came up twice with a runner on base and failed to get a hit.  Sure, game 1 was a blowout so it didn't matter and they won game 3 anyway, but he had every opportunity to win or at least change that second game and failed to come through time and time again.  Of course, this probably just means he's due and he'll do a Jason Kubel impression to Baker on Tuesday.


2.  Clemson.  They weren't exactly a national title contender or anything, but with a kick-ass RB like C.J.  Spiller and a ranking just outside the top 25 in the preseason in like every poll it looked like they were poised for a good year.  Oops.  The losses keep piling up, and at this point the Tigers are 2-3 and suddenly look like instead of fighting for a top tier bowl they'd be lucky to make the Poulan Weedeater Bowl.  Losses to TCU, Georgia Tech, and this weekend to Maryland aren't horrible by themselves, but add them up and they haven't won a meaningful game this year.  It's always a struggle with a freshman QB, and Kyle Parker hasn't thrown a TD since September 10th, but they just keep finding ways to lose, and this week it was missed field goals - they missed two in the fourth quarter, either of which would have tied the game.  They weren't exactly chipshots at 47 and 48 yards, but kicker Rich Jackson hit a 51 yarder earlier, so you know he had the leg.  Sorry Clemson, not your year.   


3.  Dallas Cowboy Playcalling.  If you had the misfortunate of watching this crapfest I feel for you, though I had to watch it to.  At the end of the game, the Broncos had managed to suck slightly less than the Cowboys and had a 17-10 lead, but Dallas had the ball, 3rd and goal, with nine seconds left - two chances to tie the game.  So they go to Sam Hurd.  Huh?  I guess he'd be after Witten, Williams, Crayton, and Austin, but ok, maybe he had a good matchup.  Nope, he was going against Champ Bailey.  Now, Bailey may have been passed by guys like Revis and Asomugha, but he's still top shelf.  So of course, he knocked the pass away.  Then they ran THE EXACT SAME PLAY, which he again knocked away - Game Over, Broncos win.  And this wasn't Romo checking down, Hurd was the #1 option and Romo was Weber-locked on him.  The announcer also commented that Romo threw at Bailey 16 times in his 42 attempts, which, clearly, didn't work (Bailey had four pass deflections and an INT, and I'd love to see the overall results of those attempts).  Just an absolutely bizarre strategy.  

4.  Oakland Raiders Rushing.  So much for the three-headed monster (McFadden, Bush, Fargas).  Well, it could be a three-headed monster if the monster was a pile of crap with pipe cleaners sticking out and cotton balls and googly eyes for the three heads, but it certainly ain't some kind of real monster after Sunday's output.  Fargas was the star, gaining a whole 24 yards and 10 carries, while Michael Bush got 10 and McFadden carried six times for -3 yards.  Darrius Heyward-Bay was the team's second leading rusher thanks to a 20 yard reverse.  The Raiders gained 45 total yards on the ground agains the Texans, who ranked as the NFL's worst defense and were allowing 205 rushing yards per game to their opponents before Sunday.  Of course, this could be more of a Jamarcus Russell thing than a RB thing, since the Texans stacked the line and dared Russell to beat them - which he didn't, completing just 12 of 33 attempts for 128 yards.  Holy god is that guy terrible.

5.  Gopher football.  I didn't watch the game because I was busy doing I'm not really sure what, but seeing as how they lost at home to Wisconsin in a game in which they were favored, I'm going to assume they sucked.  No doubt either the Daily Gopher or the Gopher Football Blog has slightly more detailed information if that's your sort of thing.

Weekend Review

WHO WAS AWESOME

1. Jason Kubel. He had this spot locked up after hitting for the cycle on Friday, but decided to declare his awesomeness even further by collecting four more hits on Saturday. For the weekend he helped the Twins sweep the stupid Angels and stupid Torii Hunter, going 8-15 with five runs scored and seven driven in, but that two game stretch may have been the most dominant by a Twin since Kirby destroyed Milwaukee. Honestly, despite Kubel being awesome and my boy and all, he's one of the last Twins I'd pick as "cycle possible" due to his being slower than Kent Hrbek - and I mean Kent Hrbek right now. I'm not 100% sure that triple was legit, but what the scorekeeper says goes, so congrats to Kubel on being a total stud, and the clear third-best hitter on the Twins.

2. Zack Greinke. For those of you with long memories, and I'm guessing many of my long time pain-in-the-ass readers remember, I once downplayed Greinke as nothing more than a #3 starter. Well, if nothing else, at least I am willing to admit when I am wrong as I seem to be doing over and over again lately. Greinke won again on Saturday to run his record to 3-0 for the Royals by shutting out Texas, giving up seven hits and striking out 10 while walking nobody. He's been unhittable this year, with 20 scoreless innings to start the season, piggy-backing on his fourteen scoreless innings to end 2008. He's a big reason the Royals are suddenly on top of the AL Central. Did you know the Royals tried to make him a reliever in 2007? Good thing they changed their minds - for them, bad news for the division. He's going to be good for a long time. I definitely whiffed on this one.

3. Derrick Rose. Who holds the record for most points by a rookie in their playoff debut? Yep, Rose, who scored 36 in the Bulls OT upset win over the Celtics, which tied Kareem Abdul-Jabbar's record. Rose was completely unguardable, and abused Rondo like most Big Ten players abused Travis Busch, even passing up open jumpers in order to cross Rondo over like a bitch and get to the rim. Rose didn't just score 36 points, he did it efficiently by shooting 12-19 and contributed eleven assists in one of the more dominating performances I've seen, stealing home court advantage from the favored Celts. A couple of other interesting things from this series are the fact that Ray Allen wears TWO shooting sleeves, and apparently Vinny del Negro is an actual NBA coach. TWO SHOOTING SLEEVES.

4. Jeremy Hermida. The Marlins keep winning, and they keep finding different heroes. Opening week, it was Emilio Bonifacio, with Josh Johnson pitching like a Cy Young candidate. This weekend Johnson again took the hill, but didn't have his A game this time, giving up six earned runs in six innings pitched, and the Marlins headed to the ninth down three to the Nationals. No matter, as Jeremy Hermida decided he'd be the big nuts this time, and took world's shittiest closer Joel Hanrahan deep with two outs and two on to tie the game. A couple of innings later with the score still tied, Hermida came up again with two men on, and again went deep to give the Marlins a 9-6 lead and finishing the day with three hits and three runs to go with his six RBI, raising his season average to .316. Hermida had a very good year in 2007, but dropped off in 08, so far at least he's looked closer to his 2007 form, and has helped the Marlins to the best record in the bigs at 11-1, currently riding a seven game win streak. The best part of this, however, was the Nationals bullpen cleaning following the sweep, with them jettisoning three of their relievers, calling two washed-up retreads from the minors and signing Kip freaking Wells. Ouch.

5. Glen Perkins. Which Twins' pitcher did you really expect to take a big step forward this year? Probably Slowey or Liriano, maybe Baker? A few people I know really like Blackburn, but I don't know anybody who saw this coming from Perkins. I always thought he was more of a place holder for Mulvey or Swarzak or somebody, and was destined for the bullpen but, once again, it's looking like I'm wrong. Perkins has been incredible this year, going eight innings in all three starts so far, and hasn't given up more than two runs in any start, including yesterday when he went eight, giving up just four hits and one run - and actually looked even more impressive. It seems Perkins has learned how to pitch, and is currently leading Twins' starters with a 1.50 ERA and 0.83 WHIP. Little known fact: his middle name is Weston. Littler known fact: I actually know one other person with that middle name.


WHO SUCKED

1. Chien-Ming Wang. Yes, he's here again. I don't mean to keep writing about Wang, and I would be able to ignore it if he was just consistently bad, but he is somehow finding a way to get worse and worse with each time out, this time giving up eight runs and eight hits in just one and a third innings, and inflating his ERA to a stellar 34.50. None of the Yankee relievers who followed him were able to do much better, with Cleveland putting up 22 runs when the slaughter was over, but Wang's season has just been special so far. In his three starts, he's pitched a total of just six innings and has given up nearly five baserunners per inning with opponents hitting .622 against him. That's a .622 batting average, not slugging. This is, without question, one of the most stunning disintegrations I've ever seen. And I can't look away.

2. Jim Furyk. I am stunned that Furyk missed the cut this week at Harbour Town in the Verizon Classic, seriously stunned. Everything was setup for a Furyk win this week. He was coming off a good finish at the Masters, finishing in a tie for tenth, which showed he was playing good golf. He has a good track record at this course, with two runner-ups, a fourth, and a tenth in the last five times he played it. So what happens? He doesn't break 70, finishing at +3 thanks to a 74 on Thursday, and misses the cut. Makes no sense. Brian Gay, whose only career win was at the Mayakoba when all the good golfers are busy at the WGC Match Play, dominated this course with his worst round being a 67 and finishing at -20 for a win by 10 strokes. Washed up Lee Janzen put up a 65 and never-will-be Tim Petrovic managed a 68, but Furyk can't even last to the weekend? I don't get it.

3. B.J. Upton. My big breakout pick this year (I actually picked him as my AL MVP) Upton has, well, not really been around. He started the season on the disabled list recovering from shoulder surgery, and then yesterday he left the Rays' game after the second inning due to tightness in his quadricep. In between, he managed to squeeze in all of 23 at bats, picking up 5 hits (.217 average) and knock in one run. He still manages to tantalize, picking up six walks as well (.379 OBP) and steal three bases without getting caught. Upton is an epic talent, but this is starting to look like a possible modern day Mark Prior situation. I hope not. And yes, this is another player I told Bogart to draft in his fantasy draft. Sorry again good buddy, sorry again.

4. Arizona D-Backs Offense. It really reminds me of the Twins, but the D-Backs played three games against the San Francisco Giants over the weekend, and managed to score 0, 2, and 0 runs in the three games. Yes, a grand total of two runs in three games. They did face Tim Lincecum, maybe the best pitcher in baseball, and that's the game they got two runs (against the Bullpen, of course). Against fifty-year old Randy Johnson and someone named Jonathan Sanchez, they couldn't do anything, with RJ actually taking a no-hitter into the seventh. Details? Ok. Conor Jackson was 1-11. Mark Reynolds was 1-9. Stephen Drew was 2-12. Chris Young was 1-10. It seems losing Orlando Hudson and Adam Dunn has had a minor effect on a team that was already slightly offensively challenged last year. Even at 4-8 I still think they'll win their division, but then again, I'm still waiting for Justin Upton to break out, so what do I know?

5. Orlando Magic. I generally don't like the NBA. I get a little bit excited for the start of the season, but am bored by game #3 and honestly didn't watch a single game this year. But the playoffs are different. I actually like watching the playoffs, because the teams seem semi-interested and the quality of play goes way up. It was interesting watching the Magic blow an 18-point lead, including being up by 14 at the start of the fourth, to the Sixers, who won on an Andre Iguodala jumper with 2.2 remaining. It was just like watching a college team panic with a lead. The Magic saw the game slipping away, and instead of going to what works - getting the ball to Dwight Howard, they started chucking jump shots. Notorious ballhog Rashard Lewis chucked up a bunch of bricks. Hedo Turkoglu was just 2-8, and I think most of those misses were in the fourth. Skip to My Lou and Courtney Lee couldn't hit anything either. Meanwhile Dwight Howard, who was 11-13 on the game, got all of two shot attempts in the fourth, as the lead dwindled and dwindled and was ultimately lost, along with the game and home court advantage. Just like a panicky college team. Not like a college team: Orlando Magic Cheerleaders.