NBA Free Agent Action is Hot!

Take a few days off to catch some fish at the cabin and you miss like, 1 million free agent signings in the NBA.  I'm going to hit a few of the highlights.  Or lowlights.

1.  Might as well start with your precious T-Wolves, who signed Kevin Martin and Chase Budinger in a move to try to surround the Ricky Rubio/Kevin Love nucleus with as many poorly defending shooters as possible.  You take those two, J.J. Barea, Rubio, Love, Luke Ridnour, and Derrick Williams and add Shabazz Muhammad to the mix and the Wolves might end up being the worst defensive team in the league next year, especially if Kirilenko isn't back.  Nikola Pekovic, who it sounds like they're going to do everything to keep, is a decent post defender but not a rim protector in the slightest, which taken all together means that Giorgui Dieng is the only true paint defensive presence on the entire team.  You know, the guy whose job it is to discourage guys like Lebron and Tony Parker and Russell Westbrook from driving past all those white guards over and over again.  Sounds like a recipe for success!

2.  Dwight Howard is going to Houston.  Howard turned down more years and more money to stay with the Lakers and play with two (possibly 3) other future Hall-of-Famers, which is a stunningly good decision given Howard's track record the last three years.

Apparently the Howard signing isn't loved by everyone, as incumbent starting center Omer Asik has said he doesn't want Howard there, doesn't want to back him up, and doesn't want to play next to him and might want out of Houston.  Well guess what Omer?  I got news for you: I'm pretty sure they were exploring trades for you already.  Outside of free throw shooting his entire skill set is Dwight Howard extra lite, he offers nothing complimentary to Howard's game, and he's good enough where they can get something nice back for him most likely.  Sorry Omer, but you're not Dwight.

And make no mistake - Dwight Howard is still really, really good and it seems like everyone is forgetting that.  Last year was horrible, yes, but

1.  He was returning from a back injury, which for a player like him who relies on his athleticism and specifically his ability to jump quickly that is a tough one to play through.
2. The system he was playing in last year sucked for him, and playing with Kobe Bryant made him miserable which, because he's an immature person, made him sulk and affected his play.
3. People around the country hated, or at least had a strong dislike for Howard and the way he got Orlando's coach fired, then pushed his way out,then got Mike Brown fired with the Lakers.  Dwight is an immature person, and being disliked made him extra miserable and see #2.

Basically Howard is an immature baby who is mentally weak and who is going to sulk and suck when he's not happy.  He still averaged 17 & 12 with nearly 3 blocks per game while being only half engaged.  You don't think he's going to be better next year with his co-super star as James Harden, who knows about deferring when it's time to defer? He's still just 28 years old.  What if he actually realizes he has an amazing opportunity to learn from two of the best big men in history (Hakeem and McHale) and embraces it?  He could be a monster.  Going to be a big year for Houston.  Big.

3.  Sticking with the Rockets, they also traded your best friend Royce White to the 76ers.  Clearly Philly succeeded so well with one troubled but talented young big man in Andrew Bynum that they were super excited to try it again. Since Royce is pretty much afraid of everything, he's started walking to Philly from Houston and expects to be there by time training camps begin. Also, I really think trading Jrue Holiday is going to end up being a mistake for Philly.

4.  In what was, to me, the most shocking development of this period Brad Stevens (formerly of Butler) has agreed to become coach of the Celtics.  I was up at the cabin with Snacks and news was on in the background because we only get one channel up there and when the banner "Stevens to Boston" came up we had to yell and shush everybody else up and do you know how hard it is to shush up three women and one old man who've been hammering wine since mid-day?  It ain't Ninja Gaiden hard, but it's hard.

I'm just totally blown away because I assumed Stevens was going to be at Butler until he was lured away by Indiana or Duke or Kentucky or one of the other big-time college programs - I never ever thought he'd be going to the NBA for some reason.  I think part of it is because I thought we were done poaching college coaches and trying to make them NBA coaches since basically everybody has been a failure (seriously who is the best coach to make the switch?  I think it's P.J. Carlesimo which is like whoa).  Also this surprises me because Stevens is only 36 and has zero NBA experience.  People threw enough of a fit over Rich Pitino getting hired to coach kids at 30, but now Stevens is going to handle grown ass millionaires at 36?  I know it's a young team after trading Garnett and Pierce, but their best player is a total head case in Rajon Rondo.  There's almost no way Rondo spaz out by midseason. I'm not saying Stevens won't work out for sure, I'm just saying he won't with Rondo around.  FACT.

5.  The Hawks and Bucks got into a big fight over Kyle Korver.  Looking at the teams involved, you'd probably guess that this was an idiotic fight to get in to, and as usual you're right.  There were no winners in this fight, except of course Korver who ended up with a 4-year, $26 million contract which, considering he's going to be 37 at the end of that deal and he has exactly one discernible skill seems like a bit of an overpay, but then again J.J. Redick got 4/$27 and Jose Calderon got 4/$28 apparently that's the running rate for a one dimensional player who is really good at that one dimension and terrible at everything else.  For some reason, this seems terribly unfair.

6.  The Warriors are getting interesting.  First, because Dawger will point it out anyway, despite all my misgivings Steph Curry has completely proven me wrong and is a very, very good NBA player.  He's not as good as Bill Simmons thought he was during the play-offs, but he's an all-star, I will admit, and there's no doubt that he and Klay Thompson are a pretty dynamic duo.   Next season Harrison Barnes will be a year older and a year better, and he started to show some pretty dramatic growth in the playoffs and he gives the Warriors three pretty good wing players who can score in bunches. 

Now, via free agency, they've added Andre Iguodala, who doesn't score in bunches the way the other three do but is still averages 15 ppg for his carrer, is an absolutely outstanding defender, and can handle the ball and create well enough the Curry will get more chances to run off the ball, which will only help.  The plan seems to be to go with all four in the lineup at a time quite often, which will work if Barnes can defend and rebound at the 4 (remains to be seen), but even if not that's a pretty potent lineup, and Andrew Bogut (if healthy) is a good enough interior defender to make up for some defensive mistakes.  Really though, having four players who can all dribble, create, and shoot is something few teams have, and any time all four of those guys are on the floor it should be fun to watch.  Possibly on both ends.

7.  Milwaukee, oh Milwaukee.  First they made a trade towards the end of last season to acquire J.J. Redick, giving Tobias Harris to Orlando.  Harris, who averaged less than 12 minutes per game with the Bucks, was given starter's minutes in Orlando and went on to average 17 pts and 9 rebounds per game.  The Bucks just traded Redick (in a sign and trade) and received two second-round picks in return.  Then Monta Ellis opted out of his deal, which might actually be a good thing, but also means the Bucks have to find a way to replace some production all while with the handicap of selling Milwaukee to free agents.

Their big moves so far have been to sign O.J. Mayo, Zaza Pachulia, and Carlos Delfino - essentially a sixth man and two back-ups.  Brandon Jennings, Monta Ellis (he gone), and Mike Dunleavey (he gone) were the team's top 3 scorers last year and now all three may be gone depending on what Jennings ends up doing.  Essentially the team is a bunch of so-so big men (John Henson is probably the best or at least has the most potential depending on what you think of Larry Sanders whose name does not actually have to be capitalized nerds) and Ish Smith.  This is either completely pathetic, or a genius realization that they're never going to be able to build a contending team through free agency and are in full on tank mode.  Given that we're talking Wisconsin, they're probably just drunk.

8.  We all know that the Lakers are somehow going to end up with Andrew Wiggins in next year's draft, right?  That's just how it happens.  If their smart they'll amnesty Kobe (since he is taking up nearly half of their cap room) trade Nash to Dallas for the heart warming Dirk/Nash reunion, trade Gasol and World Peace for whatever they can get and completely bottom out and hope for Wiggins.  What they will do is continue trotting out a lineup completely mismatched to D'Antoni's system which will be mismatched because Kobe will rush himself back by the season opener and they'll end up missing the playoffs by just a couple games and then win the lottery anyway because the NBA is rigged and everybody knows it.  Fact.

Who could say no to this?

Thursday Thoughts

-  Can anyone explain this Derrick Rose thing?  So with the Bulls up 3-2 they have a chance to close out New Jersey in Chicago, knowing a loss sends this back to a game 7 in Jersey so this is basically a do or die game.  Both Kirk Hinrich, who started at PG in place of Rose all year, and Luol Deng, probably the team's best perimeter defender, are out and in case you forget New Jersey has Derrick Williams.  In Game 5 in a similar situation (no Hinrich) Williams abused Nate Robinson for 23 and 10 assists, and as I write this mid-way through the second quarter he already has seven assists.  All this could potentially be handled by Rose, you know the former MVP and all, coming back and playing which, by the way, his doctor's have cleared him to do.  It's just weird. 

- I'm all over Revolutionary for the Derby on Saturday (10/1 right now I believe).  He's got good results, he's ridden by Calvin Borel (the pimp daddy of all jockeys) and he drew a position near the rail but not on it (#3) which is where Borel loves to be.  There's also a good possibility of rain and Revolutionary rates as the 2nd best wet track horse in the field (behind Oxbow) and Borel likes sloppy tracks as well.  Everything sets up well for Revolutionary, which actually kind of scares me a bit, but I put a good amount on him to win and boxed him up with Normandy Invasion and Orb in a trifecta.  I also let the wife pick a horse (Goldensoul because she's a hippy at heart) and let the daughter pick one as well (Charming Kitten because she's five) while throwing a bit on Will Take Charge as my longshot and still hold a WIN ticket on itsmyluckyday that I put down on a couple of months ago.  I hit the winner 3 years ago (Super Saver) and wife hit it last year (I'll Have Another) so I think we're due for another win.

-  I made the decision not to get HBO this year in order to save money and I knew Game of Thrones was going to be the biggest test.  They tried to suck me in with the free preview that let me watch episode 1 but I held strong.  Then I spent the night at Snacks' place and he's got HBO and has all the episodes and we watched two over there and I thought I was screwed, but luckily I remember that all HBO subscribers get access to HBOGO so I can used Snacks' ID and stuff and watched the last couple to get all caught up and my god this show is just so amazingly good.

I am a huge fan of the books and I never, ever imagined they could have done it this well.  All the cool shit from the books was done right and all the stuff they changed, added, or eliminated has been done exceptionally well to the point where I honestly don't have any complaints.  There's tons of hot chicks and boobs and butts and stuff which is of course welcome, but honestly the story and the drama completely sucks me in even though I know what's going to happen already.  Daenarys with the unsullied, Jamie's hand, the fight at Craster's, even something with no action like Sansa discussing Joffrey with Margaery (hot as fire) and Lady Tyrell are all good enough to be the biggest moment of the season in pretty much any other show, and we ain't seen nothing yet.  If I had to pick the best 3 non-comedic tv shows in history I'd go with Lost (the first 3 seasons or so), Walking Dead, and Game of Thrones, and GoT is so far beyond those other two it'd be like if Jim Thome raced a horse.  A good horse.  Also no, I have never seen The Wire or Breaking Bad (although I plan to eventually) so shut it.

- So Kahn out, Flip in, eh?  Tough to fault it, and I'm sure Glen Taylor pours himself a drink every time he watches Steph Curry score 16 points in a quarter and then thinks about Jonny Flynn is probably on the And 1 Tour at this point.  Really, outside of Darko over Melo and Wade and Oden over Durant that might end up the worst draft pick of this generation.  Unfortunately, because otherwise Dawger will rake me over the coals in the comments, I have to admit that I thought Steph Curry was on the fast train to bustville.  I was convinced his big numbers at Davidson were because he played sub-par competition and his team was so dependent on him that he was going to score big no matter what, but I though his absolute upside was a spot up shooter like Steve Novak or Craig Hodges.  My oh my was I ever wrong.  The guy is a completely dynamic scorer and one of the best shooters I've ever seen.  If he ever figures out how to drive to the rim he's going to be unstoppable, and he kind of is already.  It takes a strong man with a great character to admit when he's wrong, and that man is me.

-  So Byron Buxton hit another home run tonight.  That's his fifth for Cedar Rapids and coming into the night he was hitting .383/.510/.667 with 5 doubles, 3 triples, 4 HRs, and 10 steals in 14 attempts.  Simply put - he's killing low A ball in just his second year and he's just 19 years old.  I know you don't want to rush a teenager, but it's just silly.  He's walking more than he's striking out, hitting for a huge average and showing massive power while stealing bases like crazy.  He leads the Midwest league in slugging, OPS, runs, and walks, is #2 in average and OBP, and is top 5 in homers, total bases, steals, RBI, and triples. Between him and Miguel Sano (.368/.435/.747 with 9 homers) the Twins might end up with two top 10 prospects when the mid-year Baseball America prospect ratings come out.  Pretty cool shit.

- I still can't believe Joe Johnson was ever a max deal player.

First Annual (but not really) NBA Draft Diary

Draft time. I usually just comment on the picks that night or the next day, but this should be fun right here. A lot of picks, and already a lot of trades in the NBA (not just the Wolves). The Shaq trade is interesting. I won't pretend to know enough to really break it down, but I know Shaq is still good enough to average 18 and 8 and the Cavs got him for essentially zero. And his contract expires after next season, so they really aren't giving up that flexibility. Basically I have no idea what the Suns are freaking doing. And I just learned that Vince Carter is headed to the Magic for Skip 2 My Lou and change. I haven't really looked at it yet, but my knowledge tells me anybody getting Vince Carter is on the wrong end of the deal.

Anyway, it should be cool, and I'll be here to document all the mistakes, like whoever drafts Stephen Curry, Brandon Jennings, or Roy Hibbert II (Thabeet), as well as whoever grabs the bargains, like Ty Lawson, Austin Daye, Earl Clark, or Sam Young. So here we go.

- Clippers take Blake Griffin, no surprise. You know, people who believe in curses, as just profiled on ESPN and in Billy Simmons article on ESPN, are idiots, but man have the Clips have a shit-ton of bad luck. Danny Manning and Shaun Livingston's injuries are two of the worst derailers I can remember, not counting Len Bias. Griffin and Eric Gordon are a nice young inside/outside punch. Maybe they finally turn it around?

And speaking of idiots, can Dazzle and Gordy please please please stop talking about the Sports Illustrated curse? Please. I'm begging. I'm seriously on my knees right now, begging. Please? That's the kind of stupid thing that only dudes like Dawger believe in, but he also believes in things like tarot cards, alien abductions, leprechauns, and the holocaust, so what does that tell you? {NOTE: El Chupacabras and vampires are real.)

- Fun Fact - Blake Griffin wants to host Saturday Night Live, and Tivo's it every week. My money is on his favorite sketch being "The Target Lady."

- The Memphis nightmares take Thabeet, and thank god for that. Look, he might end up being a Dikembe Mutombo, but I don't think he'll even end up that good. His offensive game is barely functional right now, and he is awfully soft for a 7-2 shot blocker. He makes me very, very nervous, but everything I read said he's a good fit for the Grizzlies, so good for them. Fun Fact - Thabeet's MUST IMPROVE: Offensive game. Well no shit.

- And Kevin Durant gets play with James Harden, in what I consider a surprise. I didn't expect harden and is Urkel-suit to go quite this early, I figured the Wolves could grab him at 5 or 6. The real good news here is that the Wolves are going to get either Evans or Rubio. Of course, they are now set up pretty well to take your boyfriend Stephen Curry, too.

- The Kings steal Tyreke at #4. I love this pick. I think, other than Griffin, Evans has the biggest chance to be a star out of this class. He's also kind of an idiot, but he's young and his ability to get to the rim, play defense, and overall out-athletic everybody makes him an almost automatic success. Crap. At least we'll get Rubio.

- BAM! Ricky Rubio on his way to the Wolfies. Obviously, I wish I had seen this kid play so I could evaluate him, but everything I've heard I like. Young kid, held his own on the international stage, has been a pro in Europe since age 14, is just supposed to be an overall stud. As a bonus, he speaks broken Engrish so he's going to a quote laugh machine. The downside is that he's only 18 and the groupies are going to eat him alive, and he looks like a Jonas brother. Jay Bilas just said, "Rubio has a Gretzky-like feel for the court." What?

- I don't even want this pick right now. I hate Hill and Curry, and there's no way they'll take Flynn here. Either figure out a way to trade it, or just take Terrence Williams. Crap, they're going to take Curry, aren't they? They are, right? Just tell me, I can take it.

- Oh thank god. Flynn is the pick, and I'm not sure but I think might have just gotten a little bit of a boner. Two PGs is a bit of a question mark, but Rubio is going to take some time (like a season or two) to be ready, so you put the ball in Flynn's hands now and then see how the two of them develop together. Flynn is supposedly a good leader, although all I saw is him leading Donte Greene to shoot nothing but threes and Eric Devendorf to hit some bitch, but I don't give two craps about that. He can ball, and he can get to the rim. Loving this pick. LOVING.

- I'm pumped.

- Atlanta just traded for Jamal Crawford, giving up Acie Law and Speedy Claxton. I'm bored by this. Twenty bucks says the Warriors take Hill here.

- Nope, they go with Curry. Wow. And, unfortunately for me, this is probably the one place Curry can thrive (or the Knicks, actually, whose fans are booing like crazy right now). A team without much of a half-court game that relies on the run and gun and doesn't play much defense is actually a good recipe for success for Curry. They'll be in their best shape if they have a good PG (I seriously have no idea. Tim Hardaway?) so he can just find his spots on breaks. Crap. He's going to have a good year but he still straight up sucks.

- Knicks take Jordan Hill. That guys a nightmare. Not for opponents, for the team that picked him. Mark it down.

Speaking of marking things down, I heard a discussion between Danny Gladden and Gordon today on the radio about who the Twins best pitcher had been this year. Gladden said, "Well, Blackburn has the innings and the ERA, but Slowey has the wins so I'll go with him." I shit you not.

- Derozan goes 9th to Toronto. The only thing I know about the Raptors is that they have Chris Bosh. The only thing I know about Derozan is that he is the reason Lil Romeo ended up with a scholly to USC. (FYI Lil Romeo - 2 minutes per game, 0.5 points - career high = 2 vs. UT-Martin).

- Milwaukee takes noted gigantic crybaby whiner idiot failure Brandon Jennings. HAHAHAHAHA. Way to go Wisconsin. You guys always suck at everything that isn't college football or basketball, up to and including just being a human being. And now this isn't going to help. Although Jennings will fit in well with all the other failures of humanity in that god-forsaken state. Other than Mike Redd, have the Bucks every had a a good pick? Don't forget, they traded Dirk Nowitzki for Tractor Traylor. I love Wisconsin.

- Just saw more details in the Vince/Skip 2 My Lou trade. Orlando also gave up Courtney Lee (bummer) and Tony Battie (more irrelevant than Dawger's opinion), but New Jersey also gave up Ryan Anderson, formerly of Cal. That is going to be the sneaky difference here. Anderson was an offensive stud in college, but was (and still is) weak on defense, but he will continue to develop. He put up 7 and 5 in twenty minutes per game this year. Looks like a throw-in, but makes this trade a very shrewd one by Orlando.

- Crap, NJ takes Terrence Williams who I was still hoping against hope would keep sliding. Hopefully Earl Clark will be there instead. There are a lot of uninspiring big men/wing men that the Wolves could end up with, but Clark would be a steal. Fun fact: Williams carried his books in a barbie backpack in high school to be "different." Suddenly, and politically correctly, I'm very happy he didn't end up a Wolf. We don't need no queers in the locker room, I'm pretty sure most of that team is a couple of glasses of wine and a back massage away from some "experimentation."

- Bobcats (that still cracks me up) take Gerald Henderson in a pretty uninspiring pick. Isn't that team made up of nothing but Tar Heels at this point? Isn't this like introducing a stupid dog into a house of awesome cats? Seems like team chemistry would be destroyed here. Ron Gardenhire isn't going to be happy about this.

- Pacers go for Hansbrough at 13. It's kind of a shame, he would have been absolutely perfect for Salt Lake City, but the second best fit is Indiana. Don't they just seem like they always have a bunch of white guys flitting about, going back to Smits and Schrempf? Also I love the NY crowd, firing up an overrated chant. Sweet. Amount of seconds his mouth was closed during his interview = 0.

- Fun fact: Hansbrough helped a man having a seizure on a plane on the way back from the Maui invitational. See haters, hustle and gamey-ness always come in handy. I bet Nick Punto would have found a way to rebuild that guy as the next 6-million dollar man.

- Phoenix, seemingly in give up mode after throwing Shaq to Cleveland for basically nothing, crush my hopes and dreams by taking Earl Clark. Damn you Dan Majerle. Damn you to hell.

- DAMMIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Now they're going to take someone stupid like BJ Mullens. Ugh. Don't ruin it now, you're doing so well! Please, please, please take Austin Daye instead. Please.

- Jennings being interviewed about skipping college to play in Europe, "It's a great experience, I think more kids will do it and more kids should, it was great." Really? What happened to this? You're a god damned liar, Jennings.

- Ugh, kill me in the face. Daye gets taken by Detroit at 15. Yes, he's a little soft and a little weak right now, but his all around game is absolutely off the charts. This sucks. I love this guy. BJ Mullens here we come.

- Dickie V loves the Hansbrough and the Curry picks. I'm shocked. Claims Hansbrough should have been a lottery pick and Curry will be rookie of the year. Isn't it about time to "retire" him. Like, the way they "retire" snitches in the mob?

- The Bulls take James Johnson from Wake, which surprises me since they are probably losing Ben Gordon. Johnson never impressed me either. I'm calling this the fourth worst pick behind Curry, Thabeet, and Hill.

- You know who would be great at 18 now? DeJuan Blair. He's like Craig Smith, but with skill, drive, hustle, and talent. This would be excellent.

- 76ers take Jrue Holiday. I watched a couple UCLA games last year, and he really never stood out to me - at all. I haven't seen nearly enough of him to really bash this pick or anything, but I know he's no Cameron Dollar.

- Wolves up. With #18 they go with Ty Lawson. I love this pick, but they already took two point guards. Best player available strategy? I am a little confused, but I don't really love anybody else here, and I think Lawson is absolutely the best pick in this spot, if you aren't paying attention to positions of need. Trade in the works? I don't know, I'm too drunk to really evaluate this pick right now.

- UPDATE: Lawson is heading to Denver for a future first round pick that is originally coming from Charlotte. Since Charlotte is so shitty, I definitely approve of this. You realize this could end up being Ralph "Black Jesus" Sampson III next year.

- I had some Chuckles this weekend. You know, Chuckles.

Black and Orange are the best, Green is the worst. I didn't even know they made them anymore, but sure enough, if you go to the gas station with the White Castle in it in Hinckley, you can get not only Chuckles, but also Bottle Caps, Necco Wafers, and Charleston Chews. It's like a time machine created by a joint venture between Jesus and Willy Wonka, only with stench of White Castle Ass wafting in from the background.

- Jeff Teague from Wake at #19 to the Hawks. I could pretend I know anything about Atlanta here, but I'd be lying. When I saw they made the playoffs this past season I assumed I had wandered into a time machine - one perhaps created by Jesus and Willy Wonka.

- Jazz take Eric Maynor. Very good player, excellent pick, but Utah is a horrible fit. The Jazz have the point locked up for the next ten years in Deron Williams. They just grabbed a guaranteed back up point guard in the first round. Although Snacks has been texting me bitching about the Rubio/Flynn combo and how they drafted a backup point at either 5 or 6, despite the fact that there was nobody there to pick at 6 other than a point guard and I assume they couldn't trade it. Nobody ever said Snacks was a good basketball mind.

- Charlotte New Orleans Hornets go with Darren Collison, continuing the run on back up point guards since they already have the supremely overrated Chris Paul. I don't like Collison much. He's very much like a Jacque Vaughn. I mean, I guess if you're looking for a fluffer you're good here.

- Portland apparently moved up from 24 to 22 for some reason when I wasn't paying attention, or so Stew Scott tells me. And they take some Spanish retard. The Blazers have a ton of young guys under contract for a few years, so a Euro makes sense, but I really don't get moving up to get him. There's a lot of weird shit going on these days. I'm cautiously optimistic about the new Wolves' guy so far. Two PGs at 5 and 6 is a bit off, but they were the two best players available and nobody else really stood out at those spots. The trade of the 18th pick didn't cost you anybody overly exciting after Clark and Daye were scooped up, and has a good chance of being a lottery pick next year, since it comes from Charlotte, not Denver. Like I said, cautiously optimistic.

- I'm starting to think they need to sell Vodka by the keg. That would probably be a negative on my draft resume.

- Speaking of Vodka, Sacramento takes some Russian. Actually, they're trying to tell me he's from Israel, but he doesn't look Jewish so I stick by my Russian call. The part of the draft when everybody takes the commies is super boring. Let's get into the drafting of college guys who I have heard of but have no shot at being good in the NBA.

- They just interviewed Shaq about the trade. I fast forwarded through the whole thing. Eff that guy.

- Dallas takes BJ Mullens. Isn't this the same franchise that took Shawn Bradley? And some other guy whose name began with an A who I don't remember? I actually think Mullens has a shot to be decent, even though I bashed him earlier. He showed some seriously nice moves at times last season, and has more polish than a lot of seven footers who hit the NBA. I'm thinking he will either end up being a very, very good player or completely disappear. Not a lot of in between here.

- I just made a reference to Goofus and Gallant from Highlights magazine to Mrs. W, who proceeded to ask me just what exactly was wrong with me. Somebody else has to remember them, right?

- Somebody who is picking take another foreign bastard. What is going on here? Do I need to shut this down? How are DeJuan Blair and Sam Young still on the board?

- The Bulls take Taj Gibson, one of the most overrated players in the history of history. And he's not that much different than Ty Thomas, so I'm not sure what the point of this pick is.

- Finally a good pick, seems like it's been forever. Memphis takes Demare Carroll from Missouri. Although, again, they already have Hakim Warrick, so not sure what the exact point is. Is this what the draft has been reduced to - picking backups? I don't really know, I haven't paid this much attention to the draft in years, but I remember the entire first round seeming very impactful. Maybe it was my own naivety.

- Interesting pick here by the Wolves at #28 in UNC's Wayne Ellington. Nobody would ever think he'll be a star, but he could be a good fit with the Wolves. With Miller and Foye shipped out, there really isn't a shooter left on this team. With Rubio and Flynn, there are going to be some drive and kick opportunities. Similar to Curry, Ellington might have just found himself in a situation where he can thrive and produce well above his actual abilities. I don't love this pick, but it could work - work to help them win 21 instead of 19 games the next couple of seasons, but still.

- Ok, screw that. I can't believe they didn't take Blair or Young here. Either of them would have been a good pick at #18, and they are both still there. Ellington is only a good pick here if you are on the cusp of contending and need a shooter to put you over the top. He has no room to improve, and is a good bit role player, but with an upside of Mike Miller. Blair and Young offered you more. Dropped the ball here, big time.

- Lakers take Toney Douglas from FSU and Cleveland grabs some dude from the Congo (genetically altered Ape programmed to kill? That would be a good pick) to close out round 1. I'm tired and drunk and tired and am a little burned out. I'll take a look at round 2 tomorrow.

Tuesday Talkies (stupid announcing, Gopher Recruiting, Steph Curry, Chris Hoiles)

It's been brought to my attention that I haven't posted since Friday, and apparently people are upset about this for some reason. So here's some things that caught my fancy:

- I want to start with something that world's worst announcer and former world's worst GM Steve Phillips said during the Mets/Braves game last night which makes me even sadder than usual that Fire Joe Morgan closed their doors. In the game the Braves beat Johan Santana and the Mets 8-3, with the NY Mets (my favorite squadron) scoring just one run while Johan was in the game. Cribbed from here for accuracy, this is what Phillips said,

[“You know, we're talking about the run support for a pitcher, and I believe that pitchers often earn their run support, and here is why. I was in the front office for 13 years, at every home game, for many of the road games up in the box, and you start to feel the pattern of the game for each of the starting pitchers.

"Over the course of time it seemed to me there the same guys started to get runs, there was a pattern and rhythm to their game and the same guys didn't get runs because of the pattern and rhythm to their game.”

Orel Hershiser then asked if Santana had a bad pattern or rhythm for an offense, and Phillips responded with this:

“I think it is the feel of his game. Whether it’s his teammates...I don't think it’s a conscious thing. Players always go, 'nah, there is no way, there is no way' but I see it, I feel it every time you watch games. They don't hit for Santana.

"I think part of it is because he is the ace on the mound. They think it’s a low-scoring game, he is not going to give up runs. It’s just this rhythm of the game that he has. Steve Traschel, used to pitch for the Mets, the slowest worker ever. He never got run support. and I think he earned it.”]

What. The. Hell. It boggles the mind that someone who is not only an announcer, but also once held a position of making the most important decisions for his team, could actually believe this. It's the kind of thing that I expect Dawger to try to sell.

Perhaps, just perhaps, Santana's Mets teammates have run up against some very good pitchers so far this year in Johan's starts. In his seven starts - and in case you aren't paying attention he's 4-2 with a 0.78 ERA in those seven starts - the Mets have scored 3, 1, 3, 4, 1, 1, and 2 runs; not very much. Santana's opponents have been Aaron Harang (season ERA: 2.93), Josh Johnson twice (2.34), Yovani Gallardo (3.09), Scott Olsen (7.00), Chan Ho Park (6.67), and Derek Lowe (3.80). Five of his seven opponents are better than league average, with four of those starts coming from guys who are in the top 13 in the NL in ERA.

In conclusion, Steve Phillips, yes the same guy who traded prospect Melvin Mora (1,121 hits since and counting) for a washed-up Mike Bordick (50 hits for the half-year, then resigned with Baltimore in the offseason) is a complete idiot and should probably die.

- High school hoops was in town this past weekend with the Sabes Invitational in Minneapolis. I didn't attend, of course, because I'm not a weirdo, but luckily the internet does a good job of summarizing these bits.

There were a lot of players of major interest in town for this thing, including Harrison Barnes and Chad Calcaterra - Gopher targets I've written about before - as well as Rickey Kreklow, Jacob Thomas, Ricky Kreklow, and Alex Kirk, all of whom are also on the radar.

Barnes is the jewel of the group, ranked #4 on Rivals150, and still has the Gophers' in the mix as he cut down to his top 12. Obviously he's not that good, since his team lost it's first two games, but I suppose I'd still take him on the Gophers. I read somewhere that since he had extra time after being bounced he made it up to campus to check out the U. I'm hoping he got the Jesus Shuttlesworth treatment.


The other guy I've written about before is Chad Calcaterra, who I think I said I was worried could be another Kevin Loge or Kyle Sanden, mainly based on the other schools chasing him. The reviews from the weekend sound pretty good, however. They praise Calcaterra's defensive effort, saying he totally dominated in the paint, and also talked up his ability to get out and run on the break as well as scoring both inside and out. I'm sold. Another reason to trust Tubby.

Speaking of trusting Tubby, that's a big reason I'm not sold on Columbia Heights guard Jacob Thomas. He's known as one of the best shooters in the entrie Midwest for the class of 2010, but he's still waiting on his first offer - from anybody. He's also made it clear that his dream is to play for the Gophers, but even so, Tubby is like "meh." I don't know. The reviews from the weekend are very positive and say he looks like he can score (and he dueled Bradley Beal, a class of 2011 guard with offers from Florida and Kansas already, to a standstill) but then where is Tubby on this? Like I said, I trust Tubby.

The guy I hadn't heard of who I am very intrigued by now is SG Ricky Kreklow, a 6-5 wing from Missouri. He has offers from Missouri and a handful of Missouri Valley teams, but Tubby is showing some interest and had Kreklow up to campus for an official visit this weekend, and has since said if Tubby extends an offer the Gophers would instantly be in his top two or three choices (with Missouri and Creighton). Kreklow is an awesome shooter, which always makes my pants tight, and was also called the best passer at the event. He sounds like the kind of kid who might be lightly recruited because of physical attributes (size/strength + he's white), but just gets it done with a great feel for the game. With my Eric Bledsoe crush no longer in play, I think Kreklow might be my new wishlist guy.

Lastly is Alex Kirk, a 6-10 center from New Mexico. Kirk hasn't received an offer from Minnesota, but he's on their radar. Right now his best offers are from the Pac 10 (Cal, Wash, USC), with a handful of lesser teams trying to grab him as well. I'm not overly impressed with what I've read, and it sounds like Kirk had only one good game out of three this weekend, spending large chunks of the other two on the bench against more athletic teams. Plus, he's a ginger, so we don't want him.


- Doug Gottlieb is usually a moron, but he finally gets something right with this Stephen Curry article about how his skills might not transfer to the NBA. Well no shit. I just can't figure out why the national media as a whole doesn't see it, and instead keeps trying to linguistically hump him. Doesn't blow by defenders off the dribble. Isn't big enough to shoot over NBA defenders. Can't play defense against quick guards. Doesn't fit into a clearly defined role at the next level. Too small for a 2, yet doesn't have PG skills. Jesus christ the more I type about this guy the more and more I get convinced he's going to be a Timberwolf in the future. He and Corey Brewer can sit on the bench together and talk about how awesome they were in college and how they just can't fit in and keep up at the NBA level.

- Patrick Patterson has withdrawn his name from the NBA draft, and holy god is Kentucky going to be absolutely loaded next year, and with a much better game coach in John Calipari as well. Patterson was the fourth leading scorer and third leading rebounder in the SEC last year, and he will be joined by a recruiting class that is ranked as the #1 class in the country, and contains Rivals #2, #22, #23, and #40 along with a big-time JuCo recruit, and they are spread all over the floor, from the paint to the wing to the point. Even scarier? They might be getting even more. #1 recruit in the country John Wall is still unsigned and has Kentucky as one of his finalists, and Jodie Meeks - last season's top scorer in the conference - may still pull his name out of the NBA draft. Make no mistake, Kentucky is back in a big, big way.

- If you're into this kind of thing, here's a stupid little puff piece on the Twins from ESPN's Tim Kurkijan - normally a writer I like. If you've read this blog for any length of time, you know I think chemistry in baseball and "good clubhouse guys" is the biggest crock of crap since the moon landing (obviously faked). Seriously, the article is so sugary sweet I got a stomach ache. Plus, Cuddybear is the central figure in most of it, so that ought to make a bunch of people around here pretty happy.

- Lastly, I think Chris Hoiles is the leader for the guy I'm going to sponsor when my Scott Stahoviak sponsorship runs out. You probably had to be a fan of Tony LaRussa baseball II in order to truly get it. That was the game when we (me, Snacks, and Bear) had some truly epic seasons when we were growing up, and Hoiles was a central figure. He was a good catcher, but the best was every player had a picture, and it was clear that the day they took those pictures Hoiles showed up either massively hungover or still drunk. He had bloodshot, glassy eyes, was completely unshaven, and his hat was cocked sideways and barely on his head. Truly a trainwreck.

But even better, and nobody really knows this, but Hoiles had an epically great season in 1993. Yes, G-R-E-A-T.

He hit .310/.416/.585 with 29 home runs in 503 plate appearances.

That .310 was 11th in the league, and 15th best by any catcher from 1980-2000.

His .416 OBP was 5th in the league, and 25th best by a catcher ever (like in all-time).

The slugging pct. of .585 he put up was also 5th in the league, and is the TENTH BEST IN THE HISTORY OF CATCHERS HITTING THE BALL. I'm not making this up.

Put together that OBP and SLG for the OPS, and he was fourth in the league that year and SEVENTH all-time by a catcher, behind seasons by all-time greats Mike Piazza (three of the six better), Bill Dickey, Gabby Hartnett, and Roy Campanella. It boggles the mind.

His 29 home runs in 419 at bats works out to one homer every 14.4 at bats, a rate that ranked him fourth that season, and is 18th best in the history of catching.

Oh, and he also threw out 46 of 113 attempted base stealers that year, or 41% (lg avg = 36%), while allowing just two passed balls all year.

Seriously, we are talking a truly awesome, awesome season. He was really hurt by only knocking in 82 runs that year, since the media and other slack-jawed cretins are wowed by a stat that relies more on opportunity than ability, but still finished 16th in the MVP voting. Looking at pure batting stats, he should have been fourth behind John Olerud, Frank Thomas, and Ken Griffey. And somehow, nobody knows this because it's Chris Hoiles.

Sadly, I can't locate that actual picture from Tony 2, but he looks pretty drunk in this one too. Just imagine him 58% more intoxicated, and not exactly sure where he is or what's going on.

Quick MLB Preview

Is it ok if I'm already kind of bored with the Final Four. I don't find anything compelling. UNC is lame. Michigan State is boring. Villanova is infuriating. I guess UCONN is ok. So I'll pick UCONN over UNC in the final. See? Boring. If you really want some hoop talk, check out this thread over at the Gopher Hole where I'm having a "discussion" about Stephen Curry.

Instead, I'll do a quick little preview of MLB this year, since the season kicks off on Sunday:




NATIONAL LEAGUE:

NL EAST
1. Phillies - A very good offense bolstered by one of the best pitchers in the game and my boyfriend, Cole Hamels. Blanton or Myers need to come up big, and not having JC Romero for the first 50 games will sting. Look for rookie J.A. Happ to make his mark.
2. NY Mets - No, JJ Putz and K-Rod won't be saviors, but they will help quite a bit. Where they can't help is the rotation, which is very shaky after Johan and also includes Livan. No way can I pick a team to win their division when Livan is involved.
3. Marlins - I don't know who the GM is in Florida, but he's quietly assembled some real talent. They have a very good, young rotation with Nolasco, Johnson, Sanchez, Miller, and Volstad, and the best offensive double-play combo in baseball with Hanley Ramirez and Dan Uggla. The future is bright, with 1B Gaby Sanchez about to make a splash, at least until they trade all their stars again.
4. Braves - In general, it seems people are high on the Braves to return to prominence this year, but I don't see it. A patchwork top of the rotation (Lowe & Vazquez) and much after them. Rookie pitcher Tommy Hanson could be good this year, but may be a year away.
5. Nationals - Expansion is awesome. SP Jordan Zimmerman is a glimmer of hope. At least they have Adam Dunn now, who is entertaining to watch if nothing else.

NL Central
1. Cubs. Chicago have a very good rotation this year, almost identical to last year's, and upgraded their offense by bringing in OBP Monster Milton Bradley. If he can stay healthy and out of trouble he'll score a ton of runs with the guys behind him. Closer is a question mark with newly acquired Kevin Gregg beating out Carlos Marmol.
2. Reds - Another young team I'm enamored with, an offense Joey Votto, Brandon Phillips, Jay Bruce, and Edwin Encarnacion (and maybe Chris Dickerson if he's ready) can score some runs. They also have a solid rotation mix of vets (Arroyo and Harang) and youngsters (Cueto and Volquez - maybe Homer Bailey). I expect them to surprise.
3. Brewers - If Gallardo is over his injuries, it's a huge shot in the arm for the Brew Crew. Their offense is very good, but without Sabathia and Sheets the pitching sucks (Jeff Suppan!) and I don't know if you can trust Hoffman to close anymore.
4. Cardinals - An even worse starting rotation lives in St. Louis, and that's even if you guess Chris Carpenter can return to form after an injury - if he doesn't, forget it. Pujols and a handful of good outfielders are all they have.
5. Astros - It's a tough division to call, and really the teams could fall in any order after the Cubs, but someone had to be picked for fifth and I am going with the Astros. They're old, their infield is terrible, and their rotation is empty behind Oswalt.
6. Pirates - The good news for Houston is they don't have to worry about finishing in last. Pittsburgh has that rare ability to not only fail to find promising prospects, but to rarely develop them to their full potential when they do turn one up.

NL West
1. Diamondbacks - An exciting young offense, headed by a guy I expect to make a big leap in OF Justin Upton, two of the best pitchers in the game in Dan Haren and Brandon Webb, and a possible rookie-of-the-year candidate in pitcher Max Scherzer have me excited for Arizona this year.
2. Dodgers - The late signings of Manny Ramirez and Orlando Hudson help immensely and have made LA a popular pick to win their division, but there are too many question marks for me. How good are Kemp, Ethier, and Loney? Is Chad Billingsley really an ace? Can Jonathan Broxton be a shut-down closer? Just too many questions, although it wouldn't surprise me if they win the whole thing, either.
3. Giants - Almost a default third place pick, because the final three teams in this division are all pretty awful. San Fran gets third because of a decent rotation, highlighted by a couple of studs in Tim Lincecum and Matt Cain and the signing of Randy Johnson. The offense has youngster Pablo Sandoval and that's about it.
4. Rockies - Well, they have a somewhat promising lineup with youngsters Tulowitzi, Ian Stewart, Chris Iannetta, and possibly Carlos Gonzalez who came over in the Holliday deal. The pitching is brutally bad.
5. Padres - They have Jake Peavy and Chris Young. End positives. Seriously, their starting double-play combination this year is likely to be David Eckstein and Luis Rodriguez (yes, that L-Rod). Wow.


AMERICAN LEAGUE

AL East
1. Rays - A full season from Longoria, a breakout year from Upton (believe it) and adding David Price to an already good rotation? They might be even better this year.
2. Red Sox - Say what you want about Manny, but Jason Bay isn't nearly as good. With Ortiz seemingly on the decline, the offense doesn't have nearly as much pop as the last few years. Good young players and excellent pitching insures they will be in the playoff picture, but I don't think they are nearly as good as the Rays.
3. Yankees - A-Rod is still one of the best players in the game and Texeira can hit, but behind them it's all old and declining (Jeter, Posada, Damon, Matsui) or young and unproven. With a very old and injury prone rotation, this team won't even come close to the postseason.
4. Blue Jays - Not a horrible team, with some good offensive prospects including ROY candidate OF Travis Snider, Toronto could threaten to overtake the Yankees if their rotation of people I've barely heard of behind Halladay (thanks to injuries to Shawn Marcum and Dustin McGowan) can pull it together.
5. Orioles. Adam Jones is good, and Matt Wieters is supposed to be the next Joe Mauer, but with more power. That's all.

AL CENTRAL
1. Twins - As the Monkees said, "I'm a believer." Of course, this assumes Mauer and Baker come back quickly. The pitching and defense should be very good, as long as they can score some runs.
2. Indians - I very much like what they've done, adding some small, key pieces, and I don't think Cliff Lee's season last year was a fluke. If either Hafner comes back strong or Matt LaPorta can be Evan Longoria, they could overtake the Twins.
3. White Sox - Chicago still has plenty of pop, although most of it is old, and their rotation is the same thing we've seen for years. Question marks in the outfield (DeWayne Wise) and infield (Josh Fields and Chris Getz) keep them in third.
4. Royals - Added some nice pieces in Juan Cruz, Mike Jacobs, and Coco Crisp without losing much. If hitters Billy Butler and Alex Gordon and the young pitching staff live up to their potential, the Royals could finish even higher. Joakim Soria is quietly one of the best closers in baseball.
5. Tigers - I'm still not exactly sure what happened here, but with Detroit neglecting to give Jim Leyland an extension I'm not sure what exactly they are trying to do. Their offense should be good again, but with Bonderman hurt their pitching sucks once again, all the way down to the bullpen. Rick Porcello could be a star someday, but he's no savior this year.

AL WEST
1. Angels - because someone has to win. The Angels have the only decent pitching rotation in the division, even with Lackey and Santana starting the season on the DL, and are bringing in promising rook Nick Adenhart. There offense should be good enough to replace Texeira, especially if Kendry Morales is as good as promised.
2. Texas - As usual, the Rangers bring an excellent offense and horrible pitching to the table. This year is more of the same.
3. Mariners - Completely dysfunctional, Seattle at least has Felix Hernandez and Erik Bedard. Their best prospect, DH/C Jeff Clement who would probably hit fourth for them, is starting the season in AAA for some unfathomable reason.
4. Athletics - Bringing in Giambi and Holliday will probably not be enough to get the worst offense in baseball last year up to competitive shape, especially since they're pulling Holliday away from Coors so his numbers are sure to go down. With no good starters (Duchscherer is hurt) and an unproven closer, they're screwed.

AL Champ: Rays
AL Rookie of the Year: Travis Snider, TOR
AL MVP: BJ Upton, TB
AL Cy Young: Francisco Liriano

NL Champ: Diamondbacks
NL Rookie of the Year: Tommy Hanson, ATL
NL MVP: David Wright, NYM
NL Cy Young: Dan Haren, ARI

World Series: Rays over D-Backs


So there you go. Now I'm off to Chicago for the weekend, no computer in hand, so I'll talk at you on Monday.

Hello My Friends

Yep, traveling once again, and once again I'm in the great state of New Jersey. Since I have nothing better to do, let me fill you on some of my random, no doubt profound, thoughts.

- I'd like to start with a little story from the airport this morning. After I cleared security and was putting my shoes back on - with little to no foot odor - some other doofus gets through and walks up to his two friends. One of these said friends, an even bigger doofus - with bluetooth headset - says to doofus #1, "so you cleared waivers" and then looked around for a laugh. His friends ignored him. He said it again. Still nothing. Then he goes, "Hey Tommy. Tommy. Hey Tommy. Hey. Hey Tommy" like a little kid. When "Tommy" finally said, "what?", he goes, "So you cleared waivers, huh?" and his friends looked at him like a retard (I tried to pay attention, he didn't actually seem special in any identifiable way.) It was awesome. Yet, strangely familiar.

- Pretty good flight though. I got upgraded to first class (again) and accidentally got a little drunk (I ordered a screwdriver and two cranberry & vodkas, and each time they would bring me a glass with ice and full of the juice, and then a little airplane sized bottle of Skyy vodka. I thought the juice was just juice, but instead of that, it was actually an already mixed drink which I didn't figure out until the end. So I had six drinks instead of three. Still trying to figure out of this was a positive or a negative. The real good news is that I had an empty row for myself. There's nothing worse than having some guy start talking to you. One time I was reading a book on Quantum Physics, and the guy started telling me that he was a science teacher in Utah (ALERT! ALERT!) and then told me that what he really loves about science is how it shows how God really loves building blocks and how everything is ordered. I asked him how he reconciles that belief with Quantum Theory and the inherent randomness at the level, and he started telling me about how an atom is made up of protons, neutrons, and electrons. Hi. I'm reading a Quantum Theory book. I'm pretty sure I get it. At that point I just pulled the same move that Snake pulled when I gave him the upgrade on our way home from Chicago when some guy started talking soccer with him - smile and put on the headphones.

- Speaking of God, there are a shitload of God stations on the radio out here. I was trying to find something to listen to and found at least four or five, including one that wanted us all to know, "The economy will never recover as long as abortion is legal." I'm pretty sure that would only make things worse, but since that is an issue I have no wish to delve into in this forum, instead I will just say that stridently religious people are loony tunes.

- Enough of that garbage. I'm much more interested in what the holy hell is going on with Joe Mauer's back. Since this apparently isn't related to his December 22nd kidney surgery, we'll ignore that for now. The most recent update I can find is from March 18th, and its says that although Mauer is experiencing back pain that won't allow him to play, it's "not a surgical issue." So, like, I don't get it. It seems nobody really knows what's going on, but it seems that letting your all-star, two-time batting champion and most important player on the team just linger is not a major issue. The only diagnosis I've found is that he has an inflamed sacroiliac joint in his lower back. What's that you ask? It's lower back pain. Yep, that's it. You know what the treatment is? Ice and Ibuprofen. The real Jesus resurrected from the dead, but the baby Jesus sits out two months with a backache. Maybe it's time for a new nickname. All I know is if Wendell the black running back can keep playing with a busted up knee after a simple shot of the Bud Kilmer juice, Mauer has no excuse for missing months upon months of baseball. Can't he just DH?

- Speaking of injuries, it looks like Ty Lawson is the latest one to pull the Tiger Woods aka the Michael Jordan, and overplay his injury/illness when things aren't going well only to be miraculously cured if things go his way. One of the lead stories on ESPN right now is that Lawson will play for the Heels on Friday against Gonzaga. Really? Well I'd god damned hope so. He just played 31 minutes on Saturday in a win against LSU, and although there was a shot of him on the sidelines with his shoe off whining like he was Joe Mauer, you better believe when he was in there running around his shots were somehow miraculously falling and when he found the trampoline in the floor like they used to have in rock and jock and managed to dunk, he was jumping around celebrating like a slave who made it to the north. Old....Man.....River...(dammit I can't find the actual clip, but if you can it's hilarious). What was my point? Oh yeah, you watch on Friday. If things are going well for him and the Heels, he'll be fine. But if he's missing shots or turning it over, look out for the waterworks - just like Tiger in the US Open.

- Ok, my co-worker just called and she just arrived, so I have to go meet her in the hotel bar for a drink. While I'm gone, I want you to ponder this: "That Travis Busch, he do be hustlin'"

- Back. Some assface in the bar is a dick. I asked them to change the channel from some stupid Primetime show called "What would you do" to the NIT game, and before the bartender gets any further than the guide, dickhead guy is like, "Aw man, you're changing it? We was watching that" and yes he said was. So they don't change it. Keep in mind it's a show about how people react to situations, and yet there was no volume or subtitles. So I watch this dink the whole time I'm in bar, ignoring my co-worker but I'm pretty sure I didn't miss anything - and he doesn't look at the tv the whole time. Not even once. He was too busy making googly-eyes at his boyfriend. So I missed Penn State knocking off Florida. I'm sure it was thrilling.

- I got it. The baby Tracy McGrady. That dude is hurt constantly, and I'm pretty sure I read somewhere half the time it's because he's just being a whiner. Perfect for Mauer.

- Well, well, it looks like America's boyfriend who is really a douche but America is too close to see it but all America's real friends (me) can see he's a douche and no matter what we do America won't break up with him, Stephen Curry, blew it once again. This time in the prestigious NIT. The Currys lost to St. Mary's, with Curry going for 26 points, 9 rebounds, and 5 assists. And once again, that's all you'll hear about. Nobody will mention the 11-27 shooting or the six turnovers, it's all about the fantasy stats. I'm not going to rehash it for the millionth time, because obviously America won't listen, but go here and scroll down to the Davidson section and re-read up on his stats versus good teams. I'll wait, it's the first entry in the WHO SUCKED section. I seriously hope he doesn't turn pro so I can watch this trainwreck of a relationship again. He'll suck against good teams and just when America is starting to question their love, he'll go off and have a huge night against Furman and it'll be first love all over again. Great guy, America, you sure can pick winners. Curry and Favre. Really top notch. You're dead to me.

- Speaking of the NIT and meltdowns, which I think is where I started that whole Curry thing but I can't remember for sure, Auburn just completely blew it against Baylor. Baylor was up like 7 with 2 minutes left, and thanks to a few three pointers and a couple of forced turnovers, they got the ball back down one with 16 seconds left because Baylor is a bunch of idiots who refused to make the NCAA tournament despite having the talent to win the whole thing. So they get fouled, need one to tie and two to take the lead with 9 seconds left. Miss both. Lose.

- I want to quick mention a book I'm highly recommending, When March went Mad by Seth Davis of CBS and SI fame. The good people over at Press Box Publicity were kind enough to send me an early review copy of the book, and in all seriousness I loved it. I finished it up on the way to Chicago, and plan to have a review next week. It chronicles the 1978-1979 college basketball season following Magic Johnson and the Spartans and Larry Bird and Indiana State, climaxing with their championship matchup that changed college basketball. It also does a great job of following the peripheral players and coaches as well. If you liked the John Feinstein college basketball books (Season on the Brink, The Last Amateurs, a March to Madness) or like basketball in general, pick it up. Full review coming next week.

- - Oh crap, here's something awesome. I just saw that America's boyfriends little brother, Seth Curry, is transferring from Liberty. I don't know why, and nobody knows where yet, but I can only hope he goes to a big school so he can be exposed for the fraud that his whole family (except Dell) is. Seth led all freshmen this year by averaging 20.2 points per game, but I'd assume it's because Dell taught his kids to just shoot constantly - hopefully none of them is a crip or a blood. I did check the stats just to be sure, and he shot 42% from the floor and 35% from three with a 1-1 Assist/Turnover ratio, so it's pretty much more of the same. Plus, does anybody really like anybody named Seth? I mean, really?

- I think that's pretty much it for tonight. Hasta Manana.

Weekend Review

I certainly can't say the Gophers are awesome after that horrid showing against Michigan, but I also can't say the sucked since the did everything I could have asked against Northwestern. More on the games here and here.

WHO WAS AWESOME

1. Siena. The Saints went out and did what the needed to do, beating Northern Iowa in their bracket buster game 81-75 in Albany. It ended up looking less impressive than it started out, as Siena took a 40-19 lead into the half, only to let Northern Iowa make a game of it in the second half, but it’s a win, and a big win at that. UNI isn’t an elite opponent, but they are close to the same level as Siena, and their RPI of 88 makes them the second best win the Saints had in non-conference, and just their fourth win over a top 100 opponent.

The Saints have dominated their conference, at 15-1, and played a good non-conference schedule, which ranked the 24th toughest in the nation thanks to games against Tennessee and Oklahoma State at a neutral site, and games at Pitt and Kansas. That’s pretty much all you can do, short of winning the conference tournament. They’ve already wrapped up the MAAC regular season crown, and if they can get to the finals of the conference tourney, they should be in. With Kenny Hasbrouck and the rest of the crew back from the team that upset Vandy in the first round last year, they could do even more damage this time around.

2. Florida State. The Seminoles may have just guaranteed themselves a spot in the NCAA tournament this week, going 2-0 with wins at home over Miami and on the road at Virginia Tech. Those two wins moved them to 8-4 in the ACC, tied for second just a game behind North Carolina. Toss in non-conference wins at Cincinnati, at Cal, and home over Florida, and they are suddenly a surprising lock for the dance.

Interestingly, they’ve done it through defense. Old school FSU teams, going back to the Cassell and Bobby Sura days even, relied more on offensive fire-power to win, but this year’s version play tough defense (ranked 11th in the country in defensive efficiency) and relies on the senior leadership of point guard Toney Douglas. He leads the team at 20.5 points per game, second in the ACC and the only double figure scorer on the Seminoles, and also leads the team in assists and steals. Not only all that, but he hasn’t committed a turnover in the team’s last three games.

The last four aren’t particularly easy, with home games against Clemson and Virginia Tech and road games versus Duke and Boston College, but they likely need to win only one of those to go dancing, and might not even need that.

3. DeJuan Blair. Ok, fine, you want me to say it? I will: Pitt is for real this year. But it has nothing to do with the eternally overrated LeVance Fields, it’s all about that incredible front line for the Panthers. Tyrell Biggs and Sam Young are awesome as well, but Blair has established himself as one of the best players in the country.

This season the sophomore is averaging 15.7 points and 12.8 rebounds (leads Big East, fourth in the nation) and is still getting better. In Pitt’s games this week, he put up 22 points and 23 rebounds in their 76-68 win in Storrs. And these numbers came against Hasheem Thabeet, a guy I touted on here as a Dikembe Mutombo clone. He just attacked and attacked and I don’t think Thabeet was used to it, as he ended up in foul trouble the whole game and finished with just five points and four boards. And just in case that wasn’t enough, he followed up Saturday with 20 and 18 in the team’s 80-61 win over DePaul. Kind of a tweener, so who knows what his NBA future might hold, but for now, he might be Big East Player of the Year.

4. Phoenix Suns. I know they lost to Boston on Sunday, and I don’t really care. They fired some guy as coach and let some other guy coach instead (and I’d love to tell you their names but it’s the NBA so I don’t’ know) and now sine they aren’t under the restraints of guy #1 the team is going crazy to Mike D’Antoni levels. They scored 140+ in three straight games, which is unheard of since 1989 Loyola Marymount (RIP Hank Gathers.) And also went 3-0 in those games, so it’s not like we’re talking the mid nineties Nuggets here (I heart Michael Adams).

Nash is back, with 10-12-8-11 assists in their last four games versus a season average of 9. Three players hit twenty points in game 1, Stoudemire hit 42 in game 2, Barbosa hit 41 in game 3, and, well, game 4 (vs. Celts) didn’t go so well as they gave up 63% shooting to Boston. But who cares, a team who scores that much is just plain old fun.

5. Bill Smith. The Twins’ GM has quickly changed my mind about him – well, not completely, but I feel a lot better than I did a week ago, when I had the team in the “who sucked” category.

It’s not only the signing of Crede that made this an awesome weekend, but the fact that Smith managed to sign him for just $2.5 million guaranteed (with incentives that could push to $7 mil) when it was reported that Crede wanted $7 mil guaranteed (with incentives to $11). I wanted him at $7, and to get him at $2.5 is nothing short of brilliant. Yeah, he doesn’t walk much or hit for a very high average, and in fact, if I was starting a team from scratch I would want nothing to do with him, but he brings a skill sorely lacking on the Twins’ roster – power. He can slug, and if he’s healthy he will bring another dangerous power bat to the team.

Additionally, it’s now being reported that the Twins have officially made an offer to reliever Juan Cruz, who would instantly become their top setup man if it works out. If an agreement is struck, they would have to work out a trade with the Diamondbacks to make it happen, due to MLB rules and their desire to not give up a number one draft pick.

Finally, it’s also being reported that the Twins are watching reliever Chad Cordero, who is recovering from shoulder surgery and is a free agent. Cordero saved over 100 games in three seasons for the Nationals as an elite closer from 2005-2007, but hurt his shoulder early last season and hasn’t pitched since April of last year. He’s still not at 100% yet, but he had a bullpen session that the Twins were reported to have watched with interest on Friday. If he looks like he’s recovered, and they can get him cheap, he would be another way to upgrade the bullpen in a hurry.

Crede, Cruz, and Cordero? No complaints here.


WHO SUCKED

1. Davidson. The Wildcats have no officially put themselves in a bad position, losing to Butler in their bracket buster game on Saturday which followed up a loss to Citadel earlier in the week, giving them two losses in the SoCon and six for the season. The Butler game might hurt the most, since it was not only at home, but Stephen Curry had returned and was fully healthy and it was Davidson’s last chance to get a second win over a top 75 team (Butler’s RPI is 28th). Unfortunately for the Wildcats, Curry decided to suck once again against a good team, shooting 6-23 for the game, including 2-13 from three, and turning it over 7 times.

In his games against teams in the RPI top 120 (Oklahoma, NC State, West Virginia, Purdue, Duke, Butler, and Charleston x 2) he has shot 70-208 (34%) including 23-100 from three (23%), with a 47-44 assist to turnover ratio. Meanwhile, in his other games, he has shot 174-324 (54%) including 79-163 (48%) from three, and has a 105-47 assist to turnover ratio. Read that again. Thank god Blake Griffin is having the season he has had, otherwise this pretender might win player of the year. What a joke.

Feel free to pick Davidson to upset somebody in the first round (if they make it), because it ain’t happening this year.

2. Utah State. Looks like DWG Jinx is alive and well, as Utah State has been on the skids since I praised them after attending their game against Louisiana Tech. Since then, they lost their first conference game of the season, at Boise State, and then lost their bracket buster game to a Patty Mills-less St Mary’s team 75-64, the combination of the two may be enough to keep the Aggies from an at-large bid if they don’t win the WAC tournament – not an easy thing to do in Reno. Their best win is over #9 RPI Utah, and that I sone that will still hold up, but other than that the resume is pretty sparse, wins over Boise State (#86) and Nevada (#90) are the only other top 100 wins here. Combine that with a strength of schedule that ranks 179th, and USU is on shaky ground. I would think the WAC should be a two-bid conference, but there have been plenty of other years with just one. They would be wise to win the tournament.

Oh, and remember how I said Utah State had the quality inside guys to give Blake Griffin some difficulty? I take it all back, as they got shredded by Diamon Simpson (18 and 7) and Omar Samhan (17 and 12) of St. Mary’s who shot 15-22 between them; good players, but not Blake Griffin. Oklahoma would kill these guys worse than Michigan State against the Gophers. I’m such an idiot.

3. Ohio State. Did the Buckeyes just play their way out of the tournament this week? Could be, with losses at Northwestern at vs. Illinois at home. They are still on the bubble, but rather than being at the top – which is where they were prior to this week – they are now squarely in the same mix as Michigan, Wisconsin, and Penn State, all just behind the Gophers. With such a tight race and comparable resumes amongst the middle tier teams in the conference you can’t afford to lose winnable games, which includes any home game, even against Illinois, and even though going into Northwestern is tougher this year, you still need to walk out of Evanston with a win if you’re in the Buckeye’s situation.

Despite all that, Ohio State is still in pretty good shape thanks to how the schedule lines up. They probably only need two more wins to get themselves in, and have two home games left against Penn State and Northwestern. If they falter in one of those, they still have a road game at Iowa (and one at Purdue) to make up for it. In short, OSU is probably in pretty good shape, but they are making this a lot tougher than it needs to be.

4. Michigan. The win they picked up over the Gophers earlier this week was huge, but they erased that and then some losing to Iowa on Sunday. The big wins against UCLA and Duke will still hold up, but the Wolverines are on their last legs by continuing to struggle in Big Ten play. With just a home game against Purdue and two roadies at Wisconsin and Minnesota left, things look bleak considering there’s a good chance the Wolverines have to win all three. At a minimum they have to win 2, and then do some good in the Big Ten tournament.

5. Top NFL Prospects at the Combine. The NFL combine was this weekend, and all kinds of weird stuff happened with three of the top prospects: WRs Michael Crabtree and Jeremy Maclin, and OT Andre Smith.

First, likely top five pick and top receiver prospect Michael Crabtree was examined by doctors at the combine, who discovered he had a stress fracture in his foot that he apparently has had for a year. According to reports, rather than have surgery immediately, Crabtree plans to run a forty at the Texas Tech Pro Day on March 26th, and then have the corrective surgery that would keep him out of action for 10 weeks. That would keep him out until June or July, right up to the beginning of training camp. This means whichever team takes him in April’s draft will be taking him without really knowing how he’s recovering from surgery, which may cause Crabtree to fall (and probably be a bargain for somebody).

Of course, he may still end up being the first receiver picked, as there was some weird injury news that came out about 2nd ranked WR prospect Jeremy Maclin out of Missouri. While running a route in a drill, Maclin tripped and wend down hard – and didn’t get up. He was helped off the field and brought to a training table, and it was reported he wouldn’t be finishing his drills, fueling speculation on the extent of the injury, especially since he had blown out his knee previously in 2006. Of course, it turned out to be nothing more than a bruise, and Maclin ended up finishing the same drills it was reported he wouldn’t be able to get back to. Wrong again, liberal media.

Lastly, and most bizarrely, was OT Andre Smith out of Alabama. He is the top tackle prospect in the draft, but has had some questions surface about his character after being suspended for the Sugar Bowl after having improper talks with an agent, which sounds kind of sexy but really isn’t. He certainly didn’t answer the character questions, as instead of working out at the combine as scheduled he instead decided to fly home, and didn’t bother to inform anyone. He was supposed to work out on Saturday, but was completely MIA and wasn’t located until 30 minutes prior to his work out time. By then, he was already at home in Atlanta, claiming he decided he would rather just try to get back into shape by his pro day on March 11th, saying that he wasn’t in shape. So what amounts to basically your biggest job interview either, and not only are you not prepared, but you decide to just bail? Almost sounds like another Dimentrius Underwood here. Hell, let somebody else draft him, I wouldn’t touch him anywhere near the first round.

Slow and Steady could be Deadly

See how I rhymed the title there? That's good writing. Anyway, I'm going to attempt to preview the Gopher/Iowa game taking place tomorrow night, but keep in mind Iowa is very boring so this might put me right to sleep - much like your reaction to this post, no doubt.

When I say boring, I'm not just talking about their stupid team in their stupid state where they have a casino that won't let you in if they can smell alcohol on your breath, even if it's the morning after drinking the beer they sell in their stupid casino, I'm talking about a boring, boring team. They rank 344th in the NCAA in tempo, which ranks dead last in Division I. The scary thing, and make no mistake, Iowa is scary especially in Iowa City or Des Moines or Dubuque or wherever the hell they are, is they are very efficient with those few possessions. The Hawkeyes rank fourth in the country in effective field goal percentage, which essentially weights three pointers made more than two pointers made. They also rank 6th in 3-point shooting percentage, and 25th in 2-point field goal percentage.

They are not only proficient in shooting the three, but they shoot a ton of them. Forty-eight percent of Iowa's shot attempts are from beyond the arc, which ranks fifth in the country. And it's not just one guy who hoists 'em, the Hawkeyes have four guys in the top 25 in the Big Ten in 3-point attempts, with traitor Anthony Tucker fifth, Devan Bawinkel (what?) 18th, Jake Kelly 24th, and Matt Gatens 25th with all but Kelly hitting over 40% and Gatens leading the conference at 54%. Basically, their offense is to pass-pass-pass until you fall asleep and they get an open three pointer. If Dan Monson was still the coach this would be a slaughter by Iowa, as I'm pretty sure he didn't even tell his guys they could go beyond the three point line to play defense. With Tubby here, this is less of a concern as the Gophers only allow opponents to hit 32% of their threes, ranking in the top quartile in the country. Even better, the Hawkeyes are one of the worst in the country at offensive rebounding, so that particular Gopher weakness shouldn't come in to play. SHOULDN'T.

As far as defense goes, the Hawkeyes sort of have a reputation of being a tough defensive team, at least in my head, but they are pretty much smack in the middle of average. Their defense just looks better because they play at such a slow pace, the opposing team doesn't have much of a chance to score a lot. They don't turn teams over at all, and don't defend the three very well.

Individually, the Hawks are guard orientated, with their top four scorers (Tucker, Gatens, Jeff Peterson, and Kelly) guards and only one of their top seven in minutes who is taller than 6-6 in Cyrus Tate. The rest of the big guys are a mishmash of young guys of dubious potential whose only role is to set screens and attempt to slow down the other team's post players.

This shouldn't be a problem. The biggest key is patience and discipline. Iowa will make you work all 35 seconds on defense and offense. On defense, stay disciplined and stay on the ball. They can't beat the Gophers speed off the dribble, and they won't be able to score in the paint. Don't get lazy or reckless and end up giving up the open three, and things should be fine. On offense get out and run. Iowa doesn't offensively rebound, and they don't have the athletes to keep up with the Gophers. So run. And if it's not there, don't force it. Run a solid offense. The shots will be there both in transition and the half-court, as long as they stay patient.

That being said, since this is still the Gophers - Tubby or not - I fully expect a disappointing effort. Be honest, so are you. Too many forced shots and too many lapses on defense will lead to a ten point Iowa lead at half, and the Gophers will tighten it up at the end, but too many Iowa threes and an inexplicable offensive rebounding explosion by the Hawkeyes will bring it to the wire. That's where I'm expecting traitor Andrew Brommer to hit two improbable free throws at the end of the game to win it for the Hawks, despite his unfathomable 5-22 (23%) season at the line so far. Hawkeyes take it, 55-54.


Also, can I just quickly ask what the hell ESPN is thinking with this NBA-NCAA announcer swap? Two NBA announcers will be calling tonight's Davidson/Duke game, while some guy and Dickie V call some stupid NBA game. What is the point? Just when I think ESPN can't get any more stupid or hokey, they pull this retarded crap. Great, instead of listening to people who know about the college game slobber all over Stephen Curry, I get to listen to people who don't know shit slobber all over him instead. I just don't get it, man. Can't you just give us freaking sports news and sports highlights and leave the cutesy crap to E! or MTV?

Weekend Review

The Gopher basketball team was far, far too awesome this weekend to even be included in this review. My thoughts on the game can be found here, but it was truly an awesome, awesome victory for the soon to be nationally ranked Gophers. I expect they'll end up at about 17th, moving up to 15th or so after a couple more cupcake wins going into the big new year's eve day tilt against the Spartans, at the genius time of 11:00am. Speaking of Spartans.....


WHO WAS AWESOME

1. Michigan State Hoops. The overall profile of the Big Ten got yet another boost Saturday, as the Spartans waltzed into Houston’s Toyota Center to take on the #5 Texas Longhorns and walked out with a 67-63 victory; it’s even more impressive that although technically a neutral court, it was essentially a home game for the Longhorns, who actually led most of the way. The Spartans pulled it out on a Durrell Summers three-pointer from the corner with just 13 seconds left, despite being outrebounded 37-29. They were able to overcome that with some hot shooting, as they hit 51% from the floor compared to just 39% for Texas. Interestingly, even though this game was loaded by incredible athletes on both sides, it was a tall, gawky, doofy, foreign, white, big man who led the Spartans to victory, as Goran Suton dominated with 18 points on 7-8 shooting – and chipped in with all of two rebounds. The Spartans definitely needed a boost here after blowing their only other chance to impress by getting blown out by UNC (not to mention the loss to Maryland at home); great win for them and for the conference’s profile.

2. Peyton Manning. Don’t look now, but suddenly the Colts are looking like a legit contender for the Super Bowl again after starting the season looking like utter horsecrap, and it’s mainly due to Manning’s incredible play once again. He threw for 364 yards and 3 TDs against Jacksonville on Thursday in bring the Colts back from down 14 to a 31-24 victory. That makes the third straight game he hasn’t thrown a pick, throwing for at least 275 yards in each. He’s been way overshadowed by the amazing seasons of Drew Brees and Kurt Warner this year, both with a shot to topple Marino’s total passing yards in a season record, but he’s currently third in the NFL in both yards and touchdowns. They have already locked up a playoff spot, and are looking to be one of the hottest teams going into the post season. If I had to make a pick to win the Super Bowl right now, I’d go with the Colts with the Steelers the only other team I’d even consider.

3. Brandon Roy. I don’t generally write much about the NBA because it sucks, but when a guy is doing what Brandon Roy is doing and he should be a T-Wolf, and isn’t, I can’t help it. Roy put up 52 points against the Suns this past Thursday, and is averaging 34.5 points per game in his last five to go with 5.6 rebounds and 5 assists and is having like this written about him, calling him the player who will lead the Blazers into the next great NBA Dynasty. Great. At least the Wolves have Randy Foye and that extra million in cash, apparently used to sign superstar point guard Kevin Ollie.

4. Jodie Meeks. Kentucky’s resident gunner and leading scorer, Meeks exploded all over Appalachian State’s face on Saturday, going for a career high 46 points as the Wildcats beat the Mountaineers 93-69. Meeks, who has also scored 39 against VMI and 37 against Kansas State this season, shot 14-21 from the floor, including 9-14 from three, and 9-10 on free throws. Hmm…..46 points on just 21 shots? Are you paying attention Steve Curry? Meeks not only leads the Wildcats in scoring, but also came into the game as the SEC’s leading scorer at 21.9 ppg (on less than 16 shots per game). He had kind of a disappointing career to this point after coming to UK as the 39th best player in the country according to Rivals. He had a decent freshman year, but stagnated as a sophomore. He seems now to have put it all together, and has Kentucky looking in pretty good shape at 8-3 after a pretty rough start to the season.

5. UCONN Hoops. I was all set to write up this spot about Gonzaga, who I love this year. They are ranked 7th and were playing the 2nd ranked UCONN Huskies and seemed to be in control of the game, leading by double-digits with about 10 minutes left in the game. The UCONN did the improbable, rallying back to tie the game on a ridiculous, ill-advised three pointer by AJ Price with less than 8 seconds left. The game went to OT after Gonzaga couldn’t get a shot, where the Huskies ridiculous guard tandem of Price and Jerome Dyson took over with Thabeet fouled out and got the win for UCONN, 88-83. To go into Seattle, Gonzaga’s second home, and come out with a win is as impressive a win as there is in college basketball. Everything about this team, and particularly their guards, screams final four and national title contender. Keep your eye on these guys.


WHO SUCKED

1. Stephen Curry. Can we all chill out about Curry now? Davidson got absolutely killed this weekend by Purdue, in yet another Big Ten win over a ranked team, 76-58 in a game that saw the Boilers jump out to a 25-2 lead and coast to victory from there. Precious basketball Jehovah Stephen Curry managed to score 16 points, grab 8 boards, and dish out 6 assists, and that’s all you’ll hear about. Nobody will bother to mention his 5-26 shooting, which was 3-17 in the first half before he got “hot” and finished up 2-9. Can we please, please, relax with all the best player in the country talk. He’s good, no doubt, but, and I can’t stress this enough, HE SCORES SO MANY POINTS BECAUSE HE SHOOTS THE BALL SO GOD DAMNED MUCH. Christ, Lawrence Westbrook would score 40 a game if he shot the ball as much as Curry. Do you know Curry takes 36% of all Davidson shots? Even more shocking is that’s only 11th in the country in that stat. Who knew there were 10 worse ball hogs than him? (His brother is 39th, at 33% of Liberty’s shot attempts). He’s also first in the country in shot attempts per game, which includes that one weird game where he only took 3. Think about that. And yet the “experts” continue to praise him, like this guy from rivals who calls him, “The Most Surprising” player this year, and means it in a good way. Arg.

2. Oregon Hoops. As I said before the season started, this team is garbage. Even though they managed a win against an even more pathetic Portland team on Saturday, they needed overtime to do it against a team that had already lost to both Northern Colorado and Eastern Washington this year.. Before that win, they had dropped back-to-back home games against St. Mary’s and San Diego, and had a record of 4-6, an embarrassment for a BCS conference team. The main issue here is little man Tajuan Porter, who is like a more out of control Terrance Simmons – you read that correctly. He’s leading the team in shot attempts, despite shooting just 38% from the floor and from three. Even better, despite allegedly being a point guard he’s putting up just 1.6 assists against 2.2 turnovers. If you’re wondering about former Gopher target Josh Crittle, he’s averaging 1.6 points and 2.7 rebounds in 14 minutes per game. If you’re a betting man, go against this team every game. IT’S A LOCK.

3. Xavier hoops. There is nothing particularly wrong with losing to Duke, especially when they are ranked sixth in the country. There is, however, an issue with getting blown out when you are the seventh ranked team, the game is at a neutral site, and this is pretty much your last real chance to make an impression against a top team. The Musketeers laid an egg, getting run by the Dukies 86-68 in a game that wasn’t really that close, and now play a couple of non-conference patsies before going on to run through the A-10 schedule. I’ve mentioned the A-10 is improved this year, but Xavier still shouldn’t have a problem. They still have the win against Memphis in their pocket, which is looking less and less impressive, and the win at Cincy will hold up well, but remember this Duke loss come tourney time. OUT in the second round. Book it.

4. Memphis Hoops. The Tigers have dropped out of the top 25 after losing at home to Syracuse on Saturday, and have essentially blown every opportunity to get a big win. The lost at Xavier 63-58, and at Georgetown 79-70 before today’s home loss. Not that you can count the Tigers out completely, as they will almost certainly roll through Conference USA once again, although this year I expect a loss or two rather than another undefeated conference season. This year’s edition of the Tigers looks a little punchless, as shown by this week’s 59-51 squeaker win against Arkansas – Little Rock of all teams. They still have a couple of opportunities to reassert themselves, with non-conference games against Gonzaga and Tennessee coming up in the new year, but I haven’t seen much from them this year to make me think they have any chance of being a factor.

5. Dock Ellis. Not so much him, but the fact that this crazy son of a bitch died really sucks. That's him pictured above, and if you aren't familiar with him, he pitched from 1968 to 1979, winning 138 games mainly for the Pirates, but is more well known for some seriously crazy stories. You can read more here and especially here but he is probably most well-known for pitching a no hitter on acid, where he could only tell if the batter was left or right handed, and couldn't really see who was up after getting blitzed the night before because he thought he had the next day off. My personal favorite Ellis story is that in 1974 the Pirates were in a big-time rivalry with the Reds. Thinking his teammates were soft, he decided to make a point by hitting every batter in the Reds' lineup. After beaning Pete Rose, Joe Morgan, and Dan Driessen to load the bases to start the game, Tony Perez managed to avoid four straight pitches aimed at him to walk in a run. After throwing his next two pitches at Johnny Bench's head, his manager finally took him out of the game. He can basically be summed up by this quote, "Barry Bonds? I'd hit him at least once a game. 'Cause he's got all that shit on. Yeah, let's see that shit stop the ball from hurting him if I hit him on the motherfucking elbow or something. I'd hit him just to see, does it work?" Awesome.


Honorable mention to fantasy football. I effing quit and I hope DeAngelo Williams dies. And Matt Schaub too. Way to throw it to the best receiver in football only three times. How did continually dumping it off to backs and white receivers work out for ya, captain dipshit.