Ready, Set...Major.

Alright golf fans I am back and better than ever. Sorry for going MIA for a month or so there but I got real lazy with my extra curricular activities. So needless to say there is a lot to talk about, I will try to hit on a bunch of points and try to leave you less bored than when you clicked on the site in the first place. And go.

-The first thing that pops in my head is Michelle Wie making the Solhiem Cup Team, this is the dykes version of the Ryder Cup. This makes me more sad for the state of women's golf in America than it does to have a win-nothing-clown represent our country. Here is a novel idea, since you shit canned the racist that hated the Ha-mungs and Orientals why dont you team up the best of USA and Europe vs Asia this way at least this way we can stay away from all the total no name randoms no one cares about from Europe and just stick to the ones from Asia.

-Ok, so Cink dusted off a man that could have been his dad, way to go you shit eating fag. You should have thrown the playoff, no one wanted you to win other than that tranny wife of yours.

Side note, I cannot stand chicks who feel the need to style their kids hair like their own. Secondly, why do women cut their hair when they start having kids, it looks horrible STOP!

Watson played awesomely for four days, he hit a 8I too flush and a putt off the green too firm. 2 shots out of a championship cost him, once again Stew you didn't win it, Tom lost it. Cink still sucks in my mind but he is confident and will likely keep winning, unfortunately. I could see him taking down a masters sometime soon.

-Tiger won the last two weeks, yawn. He beat down a no talent field in MI to close down the Buick Open. I soon see MI closing as a state and being sold to Canada, that place is worthless, but its gold to those damn Canadians, they need a Stanley Cup contender. Good luck to anyone still living there.

Tiger then was given the victory last week when Harrington didn't pull off a flop shot from over the green at the 16th at Firestone. There was a big controversy over the rules official for the group putting the group on "the clock". This rarely happens at tour events, unheard of at major events. The WGC events are major events, top fields, big crowds and huge money. I have no clue why that official on the 16th tee, with 1 stroke separating the top two players decided to put the players on the clock. Harrington seemed noticeably more fidgety than his already frosted flakes eating self. In the end he said "rules are rules", Tiger chastised the officials. Then out came the talk about fines.

Listen you idiot fringe fans or casual fans, this isn't Tiger's first fine. Although the PGA tour does not make their fines public, it is widely known that Tiger is at the top of the fine list. I have two actual ins on the tour, an agent and a caddie. Both have told me that these fines are common place and the tour polices its players. Everyone quit acting like Tiger is getting jobbed, he swears and throws clubs constantly OF COURSE they are going to fine him. A lot.

-Now to the PGA. Hazeltine is a monster, 7680 yards and since i don't want to look up if its the longest course in Major history or even just in PGA championship history, I am just going to go with that. Longest ever. Couple that with 5 inches of rain last weekend and that makes for a very long golf course. Some would contend that it takes the short or average length hitters out of the tournament, well I call those people morons. There is actually just as much of a premium on accuracy as there is on distance this week. Because not only is the course long but there are hundreds of well placed bunkers and thousands of trees, big trees.

Side note, I hate people talking about shit they have no idea about. Casual golf fans are famous for this, if you have spare time head out to the tournament this weekend and take a listen. Or read insanely dumb remarks like the one by 'dawger', 330 yards up hill huh, did you walk that off homo or just guess it by the time your girthy ass got to the ball you were out of breath so that's about 250 to 350 yards and you just gave yourself the benefit of the doubt? This is rhetorical. Also Phil just showed up on Wednesday for the first time, he didn't play on Tuesday. You are an idiot.

Also, dads, quit filling your kids heads full of false information. They will not love you any less if you say you are not sure or don't know. They don't need you to be their hero, if you cant be truthful to them at this point they probably have already written you off as a role model and you should just wait for the day when they don't return your calls.

-I truly needed to get that off my chest, whoa i feel good. So here are the guys in my top 5: Cabrera, Mahan, Westwood, Allenby and Martin Kaymer. Dark horse is Stenson. Blackout horse is Phil.

-In the end there will be one winner and 155 losers, let me tell you one of the loser's name is Tiger. He has won in every last tournament that he has entered before each major this year. Currently he is 0/3 you can book 0/4. One, he is still hitting it erratically off the tee, too much so to get it around at this course. Two, three in a row is pretty tough even for Tiger. I think he is a little gassed. Lastly, the odds are in my favor. So there.

I have to run, you can nit pick the grammar or spelling, it doesn't affect me. I hope to be writing more often as the season comes to a close, maybe.

Pay attention to 16, very tough for only 400 yards and 12 a 518 yard par 4, got a hybrid?

NF

PS--10 years ago a 19 year old pushed Tiger at the PGA, we all thought that kid would be pushing Tiger year after year. Sergio, where have you gone?

PPS-For some reason i could not get paragraph spaces to stick on the published version. sorry.