Monday, October 13, 2008

Super Hockey Preview Post

I figured I better get this up, seeing how everyone is getting all spastic. Remember, I didn't write this. Mama Dawger did. I'm just posting it because Snake is too lazy to write his own preview and somehow got her to do it. Completely unedited except for page breaks because that shit was impossible to read.

Oh, and the picture was sent to me too. That's Baby Dawger being abused by her parents. No, we aren't going to turn this into a baby pictures blog.

Here we go, Mama Dawger's initial post:


SIOUX Hockey Preview Bitches

I know that is what you have all been waiting for......a witty, SIOUX hating hockey preview from Snake but that isnt going to happen today. Lucky you. Instead you got SIOUXPER Sioux fan aka Mama Dawger to catch you up on EVERYTHING you wanted to know about this seasons (Sioux) hockey team!

- See above pic! Baby Dawger rockin her Sioux gear. God she loves it.

So after a disappointing semi final game last year 2 of the Sioux's stand out players T.J Oshie and Taylor Chorney swore that they would stay one more year and get that national title......well the little pricks decided to take the paycheck instead and move on and make their NHL debut. We lost Jean-Phillipe Lameroux aka (worst goalie of all time, other then that tool Jordan Parise) to graduation this year along with the worlds best handicapped defense men Robbie Bina (aka Dawgs favorite player).

So this year we are looking at a couple of veterans to lead us to that Championship this year. We have returning of course Ryan 'that guy who won the Hoby a couple years ago but then sucked after' Duncan, and Joe Finley the 'cake eating' kid from Eden Prairie who my Grandma is in love with. She is always telling him to stop fighting..haha...Gma..haha

We also have some new guys on the team this year. Mario Lameroux, David Toews. Sound Familiar? That is because they are all the little bro's of Phil and Jonathan former Sioux stand outs.

We also have a new goaltender by the name of Brad Eidsness who has been drafted by the Buffalo Sabres. People are worried about him and we have suffered in the rankings because of it but hey that is what people thought about CC last season.
Our trend seems to be start out slow and then rock it the last half of the season. Hopefully we can get off to a good start beginning with the BU and UMass games this weekend. We are looking forward to playing against BU's frosh goalie as well.

Gopher's anyone? Incase anyone is interested here is the preview.

They play British Columbia in an exhibition game tonight then have tomorrow off. You will do decent throughout the year of course losing to UND at the Holy Grail of Arena's The Ralph. Which you will all make excuses for and call us goon's (sound familiar Dawg). Then you will get to the point of the season where it actually matters and you will suck it and you will suck it bad. yeah I would say that is pretty accurate.

I would anticipate Gophers will take British Columbia and the SIOUX may spilt. I still hold firm that UMD will beat Superior regardless of what Snake says.
Speaking of Snake he lucked out this year because the gayer then Blake Wheeler NCAA said we are no longer allowed to have a college fantasy hockey league. It is free for god sakes let us have some fun. Snake basically came in dead last....not that I did much better but I still beat him and I am a chic so that means he sucks and I am awesome.

Poor Dawg is going to have to drag his hockey hating, Oshie loving ass to Joe Sensors with me, Snake, Baby SiouxFan Dawger, and On the verge Sioux Fan lil Snake this season to watch the team that God made with his own hands and handed down to the beautiful state of North Dakota...hey.

Well, let the savaging begin..........

-Siouxfan out



Hurry back Snake.


Anonymous said...

Baby Dawger is the coolest of all the Dawgers. Well except maybe catdawger.

Anonymous said...

ps. in this post
eden prairie=edina whoops

Mama W said...

Baby Dawger looks just like her daddy! Cute!

Bear said...

I thought this was Down With Goldy, not Down With A Blatantly Offensive & Racist Mascot. W, what the hell is wrong with you? This is your blog, just because somebody wants you to post something doesn't mean you have to. Embarrassing. I'm now boycotting DWG!

P.S. Baby Dawger looks like Jason Blake. Sorry, Dawger.

mama dawger said...

Bear- I WILL kill you. For real. That was an actual threat. I am going to kill you.

Anonymous said...

Ps. Thank god Bear is leaving. He is was the only thing holding down this blog WWWW....let him go.

Anonymous said...

Seriously this is really bad, in my opinion it's more embarressing than the guy making reference to transformers a couple posts ago.

WWWWWW said...

If you don't like it, take it up with Snake. He got Mama Dawger to substitute for him, and I think she did a great job. I didn't actually read it since it's about hockey, but the kid is cute.

mama D said...

Thanks W!

Dawg said...

Bear - I had my doubts also so we went on Maury Povich for Who's Your Daddy. The test came back negative for hockey player DNA. The test results however did show that she will probably skate like she has 2 broken ankles which means that she might be Snake's kid.

PS If you know any Souix hockey players name besides TJ Oshie ie Jason Blake, then you are probably a Souix fan.

Tiffany said...

Baby Dawger doesn't look happy in that picture. She looks like she is trying to smash that stick over the cameramans head and throw that puck through her dads face for selling her up the river and making her dress like a cute racist. There is a lot of rage in those little eyes over that outfit.

curious said...

Question?...Do you think Bear wears his denim boxers around the house on casual fridays?

Anonymous said...

I am sorry but that last post was fing hilarious. sorry bear. ha

Sioux guy said...

I think this post is dead on and being from Jamestown, ND I can completely understand it. I dont get why you think it is impossible to read? Anyways the gophers suck ass.

Sioux guy said...

I think this post is dead on and being from Jamestown, ND I can completely understand it. I dont get why you think it is impossible to read? Anyways the gophers suck ass.

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