Weekend Review - 8/9/2010

 Most important news from this weekend is that I beat New Super Mario Brothers on the Wii.  What up, Bowser?

Jesus.  Will you look at that monster.  I'm like some kind of god damn hero.

WHO WAS AWESOME

1.  Adam Wainwright.  It's officially time to start recognizing Adam Wainwright as one of the best pitchers in baseball.  I mean, I know people who know ball know how good he is, and he's pretty much universally hailed as having the best curveball in MLB, but you never really hear him mentioned when the best pitchers come up.  Wainwright tossed a complete game, 2-hit shutout Friday night, bringing his season numbers to a 2.07 ERA and 1.00 WHIP, to go along with a 16-6 record.  He's now second in ERA in the NL (behind Josh Johnson), second in WHIP (behind Mat Latos), second in Wins (behind Ubaldo), and third in strikeouts (behind Lincecum and Halladay).  That is a hell of a season. 

Maybe the most impressive thing though is in his six seasons so far, Wainwright has a career ERA of just 2.94.  Only 6 pitchers since 1980 have made at least 110 starts in their first six years and had an ERA of under 3.00:  Dwight Gooden, Orel Hershiser, Fernando Valenzuela, Tim Lincecum, Pedro Martinez, and Wainwright.  Not bad at all.

2.  Adam Dunn.  This is exactly why I was praying the White Sox wouldn't get Dunn - he can destroy a ballgame all by himself.  Friday night Dunn hit two 3-run homers off the Dodgers' Clayton Kershaw, one in the first and one in the third, to drive in all six National runs in a 6-3 win (they walked him in two of last three PAs - I bet you can guess what the outcome was in the other one - a perfect 3-true outcomes nigiht.)  Remember in game 163 two years ago, when you just knew Thome was going to be the guy who broke your heart?  That's what Dunn would have been on Chicago, they would have been half defeated before the game even started just knowing he was there.  Or at least I would have been.

3.  J.P. Arencibia.  With Matt Wieters currently worse than Drew Butera and Carlos Santana now out of the season I need a new young catcher to fixate on.  Oh, hello, Jonathan Paul Arencibia (I have to admit, I thought that J.P. was going to stand for something a lot cooler and ethnic-y.  This is just like finding out A.C. stood for Albert Clifford).  Hell of a debut for the highly touted rook, going 4-5 with 2 home runs and a double on Saturday.  Then, in a totally logical move, they sat him on Sunday for Jose Molina, who is 35 years old and has solidly proven himself to be mediocre in every way.  Leave it to the Canadians to eff up a good thing.  No wonder Chris Bosh left.

4.  Brandon Morrow.  I don't think anybody ever doubted Morrow's talent.  He was a monster prospect for Seattle a few years ago, but was never able to put it together at the big league level.  They tried him as a starter, and he really struggled with his control (66 ks and 50 walks in 63 innings) as a rookie.  So they moved him to the pen and tried to make him their closer which went ok, and then moved him back to starter where his control fell apart again (63 k/44 bb in 69 innings), finally giving up and sending him to Toronto for Brandon League and a minor leaguer. 

He finally put it all together for the Jays on Sunday, throwing 8 2/3 innings before allowing a hit, finishing with a complete game1-hit shutout while striking out 17.  According to Game Score, which I outlined in this post, he scored a 100 for the game, and ties it for the fourth best game in history behind Kerry Wood's 1-hit, 20-k masterpiece, a Nolan Ryan no-hitter with 16ks, and a Sandy Koufax no-no with 14 k's.  That is pretty damn good.  And since he threw 137 pitches, you can expect him to get shelled his next time out.

5.  Jason Repko.  Gotta say, I think I'm liking this guy.  He only played in one game this weekend and went just 1-4, so perhaps this isn't the ideal weekend to highlight him, but I can't help it - I just recently decided I like him.  He's now hitting .314/.386/.608 this season with three home runs in 51 at-bats.  That slugging percentage, by the way, is higher every Twin on the roster except for Justin Morneau, and is just .010 behind the guy with the broken head. 

Repko has some pedigree, too.  He was a first round pick of the Dodgers way back in 1999, but injuries and a pull-dependent swing kept him buried in the minors until 2005.  That year he got 301 PAs, but batted just .221/.281/.384, saw his PAs cut in half in 2006, and then missed all of 2007 with a torn hamstring suffered in a spring training collision with Rafael Furcal.  In 2008 and 2009 he played again in AAA for the Dodgers, putting up a combined line of .281/.341/.459 with 28 homers in 231 games but never got the call up, and was then outright released by Los Angeles, and signed 6 days later by the Twins.  He looks like a very promising fourth outfielder with some upside.  Excellent pickup.


WHO SUCKED


1.  Francisco Liriano.  Double-U.  Tee.  Eff?  This is not what is supposed to happen.  Just as we're all happy and giddy and have boners because Baker and Slowey came to play, Franky - our hero, our light, our Obi-Wan, sucks against the triple-A team some call Cleveland.  Ok, yes, I'll admit that a good chunk of the hits he allowed could have been outs if they hadn't been precisely placed, but it's still disappointing to watch that kind of outing from our ace.  Go ahead and leave out the hits, but six walks in just 4 and 2/3 innings and a 61-48 strike-to-ball ratio isn't going to get it done.  It's just one bad outing in what has been a brilliant season thus far, but that looked an awful lot like last year's Liriano.  No thanks. 

2.  Tiger Woods.  I know already mentioned his worst-ever round at Firestone on Thursday in an earlier post this week, but it's impossible to ignore that he followed that up with a 72, 75, and 77 over the weekend to finish a combined +18 for the tournament, landing him in 78th place out of 80 finishers.  It was the worst tournament he's played in his career outside of the handful where he missed the cut, and the fact that it comes at Firestone, a course he has absolutely dominated in his career, should set off every warning siren that there is for him right now.  If I was going to give Tiger advice, and I am, it would be to shut it down for the year.  Skip the PGA since your game isn't in shape to contend anyway and go with whoever your current swing coach is and get this figured out, because we could be heading for David Duval or Joe Charboneau territory here. 

3.  Almost everyone else at the Bridgestone.  Lest you think Tiger Woods was the only one who crashed and burned, I must point out that there was an unusually high amount of terrible golf from great players this weekend, especially since the Bridgestone is a World Golf Championship event (second tier to the majors).  Woods' 77 wasn't the worst of the day because Phil Mickelson, who started the day in contention and had a chance to move from the #2 rated golfer to the #1 if he finished fourth or better, shot a 78.  The #3 golfer in the world, Lee Westwood, who could also have moved to #1 in certain scenarios, shot 71-76 and then withdrew.  And finally, the golfer who has overall played the best this year Ernie Els, started the day just two shots back and promptly shot 76 to drop all the way to 22nd.  And all this on the same day when 31 golfers managed to shoot par or better.  Weird stuff.  

4.  Chicago White Sox.  Not that I don't like it, because I do and hope it continues, but you can't win a division, even a shitty one like the AL Central, if you're going to lose two of three to the Orioles.  Their pitching is still retardedly good, with the O's only scoring 8 runs in the three games, but the Sox only scored 8 as well, and are now just a loss tonight away from coming into the big series against the Twins with the teams tied for first.  It'll be Edwin Jackson vs. Brian Matusz tonight, so it will probably be a 10-8 game, and then it's showdown time.  The pitching breaks out as:  Freddy Garcia vs. Scott Baker, John Danks vs. whoever fills in for Kevin Slowey, and Gavin Floyd vs. Liriano.  I would give the Twins a slight advantage in two of the three games, so it's very possible they leave Chicago in first place.  Or the Sox sweep and we just shut it down.

5.  Matt Kemp.  I was watching some of the Dodger/Nationals game (I have no idea why) and saw Kemp strike out and heard the L.A. crowd boo.  Knowing that in general Los Angeles fans are pretty laid back, I decided to look into why.  Turns out that was his fourth strikeout of the game (in four at-bats), which made him 0-10 for the weekend.  Truly sucktastic.  But beyond that, his stats have completely fallen off quite a bit from last year when he finished 10th in the NL MVP voting.  His average is down, his OBP is down, his slugging is down, and his strikeouts are up.  His OPS+ has fallen from 125 to 109, which is almost exactly like going from Michael Cuddyer last year to Michael Cuddyer this year, except Kemp can run and can field.  So the real lesson here is that we should all be booing Cuddy every time he's up.       


By the way, I've officially talked myself into Chip Armelin, the newest Gopher hoopster, coming to a campus near you September 1.  I put most of my thoughts in a post over the weekend, which you can either scroll down to read or if that's too much work just click here, but after meditating on this for a while I am getting a good feeling.  He's a great athlete who can shoot and handle the ball - what's not to like?  There are even explanations for why he wasn't recruited all that heavily (the football thing), and it's not like he was terrible - three time second-team All-State player and a McDonald's All-American Nominee (one of 30 in Louisiana, but still).  I'm officially on the Chip Armelin bandwagon.  Join me now, before everyone arrives.  And let's hope this doesn't turn into Rico Tucker part II.

Stay tuned.  I think you're going to get some Gopher stuff this week.  No promises of course, but let's say 80% likely.

Six Very Important Things this Morning 8.6.2010

I really don't intend every single post to be in this format, it just worked out that way this week.  It's so easy and I like doing it.  I do still intend to do some more in depth type of posts, and definitely will during basketball season.  But for now, you'll get what you get and you won't get upset.

1.  The bullpen tried like hell to blow the game.  Luckily, the Twins were able to scrap together a couple of runs in the top of the ninth, mainly thanks to a Jason Kubel popup that hit the catwalk above the field and resulted in a hit and the first run, and then Matt Capps managed to shut the door.  I didn't get to watch the game, being at work and all, so I don't have too much to add except that they really surprised me.  Splitting a four-gamer on the road against a team like the Rays is a very positive outcome, especially considering they dropped the first two.  If they can keep splitting with the good teams and win the series against the bad, they should be in good shape assuming Chicago decides to lose once in a while.  With 63 games to go they probably need to go about 34-29 or so.  That would get them to 95 wins, and I have to assume that would win this division.  Again, assuming Chicago doesn't go 45-15 like they have recently.


2.  Naturally the White Sox won as well.  Because they never lose.  Not even when world's worst closer and possible worst pitcher and human being ever Bobby Jenks gives up a 3-run home run in the bottom of the ninth to tie the game.  Why he is still closing I'll never understand, especially since they have Thornton, Putz, and Santos who are all much better pitchers.  It's that damn save statistic.  Man, people are more obsessive and devoted to that then their bibles.

3.  In case there weren't enough young pitchers making noise this year.  Go ahead and add James McDonald to the list.  McDonald, once a pretty good prospect in the Dodgers' system, made his debut for the Pirates after being acquired for Octavio Dotel at the trade deadline and pitched well.  He had mainly been working out of the bullpen in his one full season with LA last year, but acclimated himself well, going six innings and allowing just four hits and no runs while striking out 8.  I like what the Pirates are doing, maximizing the value on some marginal veterans over the last few years to acquire some possible future solid talent.  I was going to list all the upside-y guys on their roster, but there's just too many.  Just know that the Pirates might be finally starting to move in the right direction.  They're young, they have some talent, and if some of these young prospects develop they could find themselves on the right side of .500 sooner rather than later.  At the very least there seems to be a plan here, unlike, say, Kansas City.

4.  Tiger Woods officially sucks at golf.  Tiger shot a 74 today in the first round of the Bridgestone Invitational, which is +4, and you may think that's just a bad round and other golfers like Anthony Kim and Camilo Villegas shot similar scores, but this is notable for one big reason:  he completely dominates this course.  Forget about Augusta, Pebble, or St. Andrews, Firestone is where he really dominates, having won this tournament something like 7 out of the last 10 times he's played it with a runner-up mixed in as well.  That 74 is not only his worst score on this course by two strokes, but it also puts him in a tie for 70th - and there are only 81 golfers entered.  He only shot better than seven golfers, several of whom barely even count, on a course he's owned.  I think it's safe to say his career is pretty much over.  Might as well retire and start collecting stud fees.

5.  I guess Calipari didn't teach Josh Pastner everything.  Slick Cal never seemed to have issues getting his recruits eligible (see:  Rose, Derrick and Evans, Tyreke) but Josh Pastner has just run into some issues with Will Barton, Class of 2010's #2 rated shooting guard and #11 on the Rivals list.  Barton has been ruled academically ineligible for the year, and if the NCAA doesn't pass him on appeal (they won't), it will be a major blow to Pastner's attempts to keep Memphis relevant.  The question for Gopher fans is how will this affect Trevor Mbakwe and his possible choice between the Gophers and Tigers?  There's some speculation that seeing Memphis suspend a player for the entire year would turn him off, but I don't really see it.  If his trial is pushed back again and Minnesota won't let him play but some team promises he can suit up, whether it's Memphis or Morehead State, I have a feeling he'll be there.  And then, in two years, we can watch both Royce White and Trevor Mbakwe make All-American teams while the Gophers grab yet another double-digit seed.

6.  The Gophers will play Western Kentucky in the Puerto Rico Tip-off.  And if they beat the Hilltoppers, and they should, they will likely have a date with Harrison Barnes and the North Carolina Tarheels.  Can Tubby and the boys pull off another marquee win in an early season tournament to go with their wins over Louisville and Butler the last two years?  I don't know, probably.  


As far as WKU goes, they're generally amongst the top team's in the Sun Belt, but they are still a far cry from the sweet 16 team or the team led by Taco Hawk, and are losing their top player in guard A.J. Slaughter.  Still, the Hilltoppers have proven over and over again that this isn't a program you can ever take lightly.  They have four of their top seven back from the 20-12 team from last season, the same team that beat Vanderbilt and Mississippi State, and have a Rivals Top 150 player coming in guard Derrick Gordon (#126).  Great, I've suddenly talked myself into being terrified for this game.

The rest of the schedule was released as well, and I sort of feel like it maybe deserves it's own post but ugh.  Look at this:  Northeastern State, Winona State, Wofford, Siena, NDSU, Virginia, Cornell, @ St. Joe's, Eastern Kentucky, and Akron.  Woof.  I know three of those teams were in the NCAA Tournament last year, but both Siena and Cornell were hit hard by graduations.  Wofford is the only team on there that is likely to get a bid, although Siena could still grab one with what they have left.  Overall pretty underwhelming.  Just like your mom.

Week in Review - 5/10/2010

Well the Players Championship was pretty lame.  Nobody within sniffing distance of the lead played well on Sunday with the exception of Tim Clark, letting that weird little midget and his gay-ass long putter to end up taking the win.  I refuse to acknowledge he is awesome despite the fact that I was planning on bestowing that status on whoever won at Sawgrass, because I refuse to compliment anyone who uses a long putter - and little people creep me out.  Also amongst the things done by creepy little people that I won't be acknowledging is Dallas Braden's perfect game against the Rays on Sunday.  To throw a perfecto against that lineup would normally be amazing, but every since his little 12-year-old-boy-like outburst against A-Rod for "stepping on my mount" I can't stand the little guy.  Plus his name is Dallas.

Actually, I suppose I could just put an entry for "Dwarves" in the Who Was Awesome section and talk about these two, but I don't really want to get into it because I have a couple of small friends and I'm not sure what side of the normal/freaky line they fall on.  So let's just ignore these oompa loompas this week and move on.  Agreed?  Agreed.


WHO WAS AWESOME

1.  Nick Blackburn.  Pretty tough to ignore the week Blacky pulled out, going 2-0 with a complete game against Detroit earlier this week and then following it up with seven shutout innings on Sunday against Baltimore.  I really don't know what to make of him.  He doesn't strike anyone out (just 9 this year in 40 innings), but he doesn't walk anybody (11) either, and when he keeps the ball down and gets batters to keep it on the ground he can be very effective, like in that CG against Detroit where he got 22 ground balls to just 11 fly balls.  Of course, when he's bad and batters are hitting the ball in the air, he generally gets shelled.  All said, he's a good middle of the rotation starter, just like every other Twins' pitcher not named Liriano.  In other words, he's good enough to win more than he loses, and with this team's offense should have a solid year.

2.  LeBron James.   Wow, talk about making a statement.  After the Celtics stole game 2 in Cleveland to even the series at 1-1 there was a lot of chatter about how the Celtics were going to win, and the Cavs choked and were likely to choke the series away and blah blah blah.  I'm guessing LeBron heard that, because he absolutely took the Celtics behind the woodshed on Friday and showed them his dark secret.  He scored 21 points in the first quarter on something like 9-11 shooting, grabbed every rebound, and assisted on several other Cav baskets in route to a huge 1st quarter lead that ended up in becoming a huge blowout win.  I've really never seen anything like it.  Against a very good defensive team, James could literally do anything he wanted.  I don't watch a ton of NBA, but now I know what all those NBA dorks are talking about with the "greatest ever" talk.  Just wow.  Of course.....

3.  Rajon Rondo.   Thanks to Rondo, you can't count the Celtics out just yet, because just as when LeBron is on nobody on the Celtics can stop him, the Cavs don't have anyone on their roster who can stop Rondo when he gets it going either.  Paul Pierce absolutely sucked on Sunday, but it didn't matter since Rondo basically became LeBron (who, by the way, gets every single call to the point of embarrassment), putting up 29 points, grabbing 18 rebounds, and dishing 13 assists.  Like James in the previous game, Rondo could do whatever he wanted, whenever he wanted.  And as impressive as LeBron was, there's still a sense that he could do it whenever he wanted and sometimes coasts on his jumper.  With Rondo it was more impressive, because you really got that "raising his game" vibe.  Very fun to watch.

4.  Purdue.  With JaJuan Johnson and E'Twaun Moore having put themselves in the NBA draft but not hiring an agent, there was a pretty clear best and worst case scenario here.  If Johnson and Moore stayed in the draft, the Boilers would become Robbie Hummel plus talented question-marks and would likely be a fringe NCAA type team with a Sweet 16 upside and an NIT downside.  If those two pulled out of the draft, the become a national title contender where a Sweet 16 elimination would be a failure.  Since I'm putting this team in the Awesome category, you can probably guess that Moore and Johnson have decided to return.  Actually, with Talor Battle, Mike Davis, and Demetri McCamey all doing the right thing and coming back to school, the Big Ten is only losing Evan Turner and that dumbass Manny Harris to early entry.  Great.  I love it when the conference gets stronger.

5.  Vladimir Guerrero.  Monster week for Vlad.  It seemed like every time I was watching Sportscenter they were showing a Vlad home run this week.  And he certainly was ripping the ball, hitting .360 and slugging .840 this week with 4 home runs and 13 ribbies in the 7 games, probably because he's feeling threatened by the awesomeness that is Justin Smoak.  Whether it's Smoak-related, the change of scenery to Tejas, or health related, it's working.  After a disastrous 2009 where he hit just .295 and OPSed .794 with 15 home runs (all career worsts) , his stats this year are at a much more robust .348 average with an OPS of .941, numbers much more suited to his prime years.  Ponce de Leon was wrong.  The Fountain of Youth isn't in Florida.  It's in Texas.  At the Alamo.  In the Basement.



WHO SUCKED

1.  Clayton Kershaw.   Kershaw, a big-time SP propect for the Dodgers, had a very, very nice season last year - his second in the bigs.  He was just 8-8, which doesn't really matter, and in 171 innings pitched he allowed just 119 hits while striking out 185.  Those are pretty incredible numbers, which makes his struggles this year even more confusing.  Going into Sunday he was sporting a 4.99 ERA this year (it was 2.79 last season) and a WHIP of 1.70 (it was 1.23 last year), and he hit his nadir (at least thus far) in a disaster of an outing last week against Milwaukee, where he lasted just 1 and 1/3 innings, giving up five hits and seven runs before getting yanked.  I've watched Kershaw pitch a couple of times, and the kid has electric stuff.  I'm not sure what the issue is, but I'm sure he'll get it figured out and start making morons look like fools at the plate again soon.  Or he's in a death spiral and will be out of the league in two years.  Since he actually bounced back with a really nice outing on Sunday and out-dueled Ubaldo, I'm betting against the death spiral thing.

2.  Atlanta..   Starting with the Hawks, who are now down 0-3 to the Magic, and haven't even been close in a game yet, losing by 43, 14, and 30, and I literally watched three Hawks watch a missed Orlando three pointer bounce right back to the shooter, then continue watching as he waltzed in for an uncontested dunk.  They can't shoot either, with their best shooting performance in the three games has been just 40%, and "star" Joe Johnson has practically torn-up the max contract someone was going to give him this offseason by chucking it up some stinkers:  10 pts (4-11 shooting) and 5 TOs in game 1, 5-16 shooting and just 2 rebounds in game 2, and just 8 points on 3-15 shooting in game 3.  He's helped to guarantee that this is the most boringest series of the most boringest NBA playoffs ever.  Seriously, three of the four series suck.  At least Phoenix/LA and Cleveland/Orlando should make for a pretty good Final Four - as long as LA doesn't win again.  And although the Braves haven't been terrible, they did toss out a couple of clunkers this week.  First, they almost get perfected by Scott Olsen on Tuesday, and then on Friday night they let old man Moyer toss a complete game two-hitter against them, just his second shutout in the last seven years.  And don't forget, this is the team that was no-hit by Ubaldo earlier this season as well.  The Braves might not be a horrible team overall, but at their worst, they hit like a collection of nine Puntos.  Or Kubels, at this point, jesus.

3.  Tiger Woods.   Well he made the cut at the Players, which is good, but had to withdraw in the middle of the fourth round due to a neck injury, which is bad.  And his swing right now is all kinds of F'd up.  Not only can he not hit a fairway to save his life (he only 6 last week at Quail Hollow), but he can't hit for distance either - he was dead last in driving distance this week at just 258 yards.  Seriously, Brad Faxon thinks Tiger hits the ball like a girl.  Clearly, he rushed himself back a bit early, and if he's smart he'll shut it down for a bit and maybe target the PGA Championship for his return.  Of course, he won't be able to stay away from the rest of the majors, at a minimum, but I really think he needs to take a lot of time, and get himself back into the same shape he was before his wife lost her mind.  He's at a very interesting crossroads, that's for sure.  Can't wait to see how this goes down. 

4.  San Antonio Spurs.  Speaking of boring series, I knew the Spurs window was closing, but I wasn't expecting it be slammed shut on their fingers with a 4-0 sweep by the Suns.  I guess when, except for a couple of guys, every contributor on the team is either old or white Father Time can catch up pretty quickly.  You might be tempted to chalk it up to the fact that they were playing the Suns and their unusual-ish style, but the Spurs have basically owned the Spurs over the years.  Getting swept by the Sun in round 2 is probably more damaging and soul-baring than getting swept in the first round by the Mavs would have been.  Realistically, they can hold on and be a non-threatening playoff team for a couple of years, but if they're smart it's time to start trying to get all the value they can out of whichever pieces they can move, otherwise they'll be looking at a long fall down the line.

5.  Jason Kubel.  As you probably know, I am Kubel's biggest fan.  However, he is starting to lose even me, going just 3-15 this week and is still hitting just .209 this year and is still sitting on two home runs - the same amount as Orlando Hudson.  He's still walking, which shows he hasn't completely lost it, and he isn't striking out significantly more often, but he just isn't hitting.  I haven't seen a lot of hard hit balls right at people or miraculous plays to rob hits, it's more a bunch of super weak tappers at infielders and infield pop ups (he's doubled his IF popup % from last year) and he's now losing at-bats to Thome.   I know one of these days he'll be back, and when he does he's going to be white hot, you can count on it.  I just don't know when.  So I'm going to try to jump start his season for him - we'll be benching him in fantasy this week.  That practically guarantees he's going to break out.  Or at least he better.  I don't want to have to burn my Kubel shirt.  It cost me like fifteen bucks.


Finally I'd like to add a couple more people that are awesome in honor of Mother's Day:  Mama W and Grandma W.  You both rock, and have been a huge influence on the person I have become.

Shame on you.

Week in Review - 5/3/2010

 Sorry for the delay this week, but I've basically been on a 48-hour bender and couldn't find the time to post.  See if you can tell which entries below I wrote earlier in the week, and which I just slapped up there right now.

WHO WAS AWESOME

1.  Wilson Ramos.  Time to trade Mauer now while he has the most value, we don't need him.

2.  Justin Smoak.  Finally got his first hit and first home run, and although the numbers don't look all that great now, he's still walking and the hits are going to start to come as he tears up pitching on his March to rookie-of-the year.  It's a lock.

3.  Colorado.  I'm talking the college basketball team here.  I know, you're all like "say what?" but the Buffaloes caught a huge boost when freshman stud Alec Burks decided not to enter the NBA Draft, despite a decent chance that he'd be a late first-round pick and the fact that you've never heard of him.  Burks was the Big-12 freshman of the year (suck it, Xavier Henry) and had NBA scouts slobbering all over him most of the year, despite very little high-major attention coming out of high school (which would explain how he ended up in Boulder).  He's now back, super stud and Big 12 third-teamer Cory Higgins is back, and new coach Tad Boyle is basically guaranteed to be better than Jeff Bzdelik (he's done a nice job with No Co).  I'm not quite ready to say things are looking up for the Buffaloes, but they're looking slightly better - like working at Taco Bell instead of Taco Johns's.

4.  NC State.  Sticking with the college hoops theme, it looks like the Woflpack are back, for the first time since the days of Julius Hodge.  This assumes that Tracy Smith's entry into the NBA draft is similar to when Dan Coleman and Spencer entered a few years ago and isn't anything real -although don't mistake what I'm saying, T. Smith is far better than either of those two clowns (I will admit I kind of might be starting to like Spencer as a radio guy).  They just picked up a commitment from C.J. Leslie, an outstanding swingman and McDonald's All-American who ranks as the 14th best recruit in the country according to Rivals.  He joins fellow recruits PG Ryan Harrow (ranked #19), SG Lorenzo Brown (#36), and a very talented group of sophomores (as well as Smith) to give NC State as much talent as they've had in a long time.  They also have a good shot at inking the #45 recruit PF Luke Cothron.  Of course Sid Lowe couldn't out-coach a wet paper bag or medium-sized rock, so there's a ceiling to their potential success.

5.  Chris Tillman.  If your firs reaction was that this guy is some kind of cornerback, congratulations you're wrong.  And also an idiot.  No, Tillman is a minor-league prospect of the Balitmore Orioles - a pitcher, to be precise - and is looking like he's every bit as good as advertised.  He one-upped a much publicized outing by Stephen Strasburg where he threw five no-hit innings in AA by throwing a full-game, 9-inning no hitter in AAA.  Tillman, who was acquired in the Erik Bedard trade, was ranked by Baseball Prospectus as the #3 talent under the age of 25 on the O's (behind #2 Adam Jones and #1 Adult Jesus (Wieters)) and is one of a slew of good looking pitching prospects that have brought a little bit of optimism back to Camden Yards.  With the back end of the O's rotation struggling and this outing, expect to see Tillman hit the bigs sooner rather than later.

WHO SUCKED

1.  Tiger Woods.  I suppose it has to be said that if you thought Tiger was all the way back, he's probably not.  Not after shooting 74-79 at Quail Hollow and missing the cut by 8 shots.  Eight!  Out of 152 players, he finished better than nine of them, and his 79 on Friday (highlighted by back-to-back double bogeys) was better than only five rounds shot in the entire tournament.  That 79 was the second worst round of his career, and his 153 is his worst outing through 36 holes - ever.  Simply put, this wasn't just an off weekend, it was a complete disaster.  Clearly he is a golf robot fueled by sex with hookers and he's running pretty low on fuel.  Might be time to get back on that horse there, guy.  And I said horse.  Not whores.

2.  Dallas Mavericks.  Remember how the Mavs were supposed to be a sleeper to make the finals from the west?  :fartnoise:  Good work guys.  In case you missed it, the #2 seed in the West got bounced 3 games to 2 by San Antonio, once again proving that the Spurs will never die - like Al Davis or Jesse Crain.  Combine an inability to guard Manu Ginobilli's nose, Jason Kidd's Colt Iverson-like three-point shooting, and the curse of Mark Cuban, and the Mavs were doomed.  Seriously, these guys had one shot in the 2006 finals versus Miami and got screwed by the league mandate to give Dwyane Wade every call.  Now, no matter how many trades they make, whether good  (Josh Howard for Caron Butler and Brendan Haywood) or bad (Jason Kidd for Devin Harris), they aren't getting back to the finals any time soon.  Plus that team is WAY over their allotment of Mexicans.

3.  Ben Sheets.  Two starts this week, and he got absolutely shelled in each.  I'm thinking that experiment is not exactly going according to plan.

4.  Trevor Hoffman. Never send to know for whom the bells tolls; it tolls for thee.  Hells Bells indeeed.   

5.  Jevan Snead.  You know how you hear about guys who go early-entry into the NBA draft and don't get drafted?  Well, that's exactly what happened to Ole Miss QB Jevan Snead, except it was the NFL draft he entered early, and instead of not getting drafted in a two-round draft, it's a seven rounder.  Ouch.  Evan more confusing is that it wasn't exactly like his stock was rising.  Snead was supposed to be a fringe Heisman candidate to start, but after a Junior year that was worse than his sophomore year and inconsistently play all-around, it should have been clear he wasn't ready for the NFL draft.  And now 32 NFL GMs agreed, an average of 7 or so times a piece.  What's the NFL equivalent of the D-League?  The CFL?  Arena League?


And yes, the NFL draft was technically last week, but I didn't know about Snead until this week so I'm including it here.  Sorry, those are the rules.  The moose out front should have told ya.

Fare thee Well, Paul Carter (+ Masters Preview)

In definite bummer news, it came out early this morning from Nadine at the Gopher Hole that Paul Carter is transferring to be closer to his family.  If you remember, his sister is sick with something I don't remember so I'm going to say cancer, and since Carter is close with her he feels he needs to be there for his family.  While most Gopher transfers have simply been players who shouldn't have been recruited to the Big Ten in the first place (Limar Wilson, Engen Nurumbi, Aliou Kane), discipline problems (Brandon Smith), or just unhappy (Antoine Broxsie), this is a transfer that actually is a bummer, although it makes a lot of sense for him.

I was hoping Carter could be next year's Damian Johnson, and his offensive game was progressing nicely outside of the 2.5 missed layups per game.  Not to mention it was always fun to debate who would win a no-rules bar fight between him and Westbrook.  I wish Carter nothing but the best, and hope he has much success wherever he ends up. Whoever is lucky enough to snag him will be getting a good player, a by all accounts great person, and I assume one hell of a bar fighter.  This also ensures the Gophers will have enough scholarships for Maurice Walker, Cory Joseph, and Royce White, should that come to fruition, so if you're looking for a silver lining there you go.

With that said, this weekend is of course the Return of Tiger Open held at Augusta, so I feel the need to give a bit of a preview, top ten style.  If you're itching to talk Twins we'll get their eventually, but it's only been two games so settle down, nerd.  I will say that Delmon looks great, not just because he slimmed down but he seems like he has an idea of what he's doing at the plate.  More on that later this week or maybe next. 

If you're looking to wager on the tournament, your best bets (for the money) are Furyk at 15-1, Dustin Johnson at 33-1, Nick Watney at 45-1, Mike Weir at 50-1, and Zach Johnson at 55-1.  Anyway, here are your top 11, much like I do with NFL odds:


1.  Jim Furyk.  More of a hunch than anything specifically pointing to him as the favorite, but it's not as if it's a total shot in the dark.  Furyk won just a few weeks ago at the Transitions, which, granted, isn't the most high-profile of tournaments but there is still a pretty decent field and it was Furyk's first win since 2007 so he's got momentum.  He followed that up with an 11th at the Arnie Palmer against a very good field, and he's always been pretty good at Augusta with four top tens in his career (T-10 last year) and has only missed the cut here once.  Plus, there's nothing better than watching that sweet, fundamental swing of Furyk's.  That's why they call him "The Big Fundamental."

2.  Lee Westwood.   Nobody hates it more than me when a dirty Euro comes over here and tramps all over our country and steals our women and our green jackets, but Westwood has the look of a player who is ready to finally win his first major.  Also the look of someone with terrible teeth, dumbo ears, and who needs a shower.

3.  Ernie Els.  With the way this jackass is playing he should probably be your favorite to win this week, but he's played as many holes on the weekend at Augusta the last three years as I have (hint:  it's zero).  Prior to those missed cuts, however, Els had five top tens from 2000-2004.  How much of his crappy play the last few years was due to injury and how much was just being bad?  Is he back and awesome or was it all kind of a fluke?  I don't know.  You tell me.

4.  Tiger Woods.  God, I don't know where to slot him.  I'm not worried about him mentally since he's basically a robot programmed soley to golf and have sex with whores, but he hasn't played competitive golf in months, and playing practice rounds isn't the same thing.  I think he's a lot more likely to blow away the field and set a course record than he is to implode and miss the cut.  Plus it would be kind of sweet to watch/listen to all the spazzes who hate him cry.

5.  Ian Poulter.  Poulter is a dingleberry who wears hot pink pants and he missed the cut in his last start, but I can't help but shake the feeling that he's going to be in the mix on Sunday.  He seems to live for the big events, even though as I now look at his career in majors it really isn't all that impressive.  Huh.  This could be one of those "perception isn't reality" kind of things.  I guess we'll find out how stupid I am by Sunday.  Or, god forbid, Friday.

6.  Retief Goosen.  He seems to be popping up on a lot of lists as a favorite, and why not?  He's playing as well as he has in years with five top-10s already this year, and he's an absolute majors horse.  He has four career top-3s at Augusta, and prior to missing the cut last year he had finished top-20 seven consecutive years at the Masters.  He's almost certainly going to be a factor again this year.   

7.  Delmon Young.  Is there anything he can't do?

8.  Nick Watney.  I love this guy.  He's just a solid all-around player with no major holes in his game and who rarely seems intimidated by a strong field, a famous course, or a big tournament.  He's been solid, if unspectacular this year, but has shown in the past that he can get around at Augusta.  In his two career appearances here he's finished 11th and 19th.  I think things are lining up for him to jump up and surprise this weekend.

9.  Charl Schwartzel.  Kind of a sleeper pick, but when he's everybody's big sleeper is he really a sleeper anymore?  Schwartzel has played in four tournaments in the States and has three top 10s (including two WGC events) and has two wins on the European Tour to boot.  His name is retarded, but he can clearly play and he's from South Africa where apparently everyone is good at golf and racism.

10.  Steve Stricker.  He has to be on this list because he's just so damn good and consistent, mostly because he's so good with the putting stick.  Now that Adam Scott died, he's clearly the best golfer without a major victory and he's been in such a zone that he's almost certainly going to get one this year.  Why not now?

11.  Padraig Harrington.  He's so good in majors that you can't possibly discount him, even if he sort of seems like he's been coasting since that incredible run where he won 3 out of 6 majors.  But like I said, you can't discount him.  Like an Ipod on Black Friday.

Mauer for MVP?

Before I get to "Can Joe Mauer win the MVP?" how crazy was the end of the PGA? Going into today's final round, three players have a realistic chance at winning: Tiger Woods at -8, Padraig Harrington at -6, and Y.E. Yang at -6, with a whole bunch of other people who would need an amazing day to get into the conversation. Well, nobody even bothered to break 70, Harrington shot a +6 to drop completely out of contention, and Yang and Tiger went head-to-head (they were playing partners today) and Tiger is the one who blinked.

After Yang's chip in for Eagle at 14 to give him a 1 shot lead, Tiger had plenty of chances to at least make a run at tying it up, but coughed them up. He flubbed a 5-Wood trying to get home in two at the par-5 fifteenth, then missed the green on all three closing holes. Yang even tried to help him out by bogeying seventeen, but Tiger went ahead and bogied as well. Just an incredible thing. I won't quite jump on the "Tiger has lost his mystique" bandwagon, but it was pretty mind blowing watching the best, most intense, nerves-of-steel competitor I've ever seen (outside of Scott Norwood, of course) choke away the championship, playing at a similar level and making the same mistakes he's watched his Sunday playing partners make time after time. I'm still in a little bit of shock.

I also want to mention that Rory McIroy has the absolute hottest girlfriend on the PGA Tour. Just sick hot. Anyway, back to the question, "Can Joe Mauer win the MVP award on a losing team?"

Now, it can be done and has been before. Maybe most famously by the Hawk, Andre Dawson, who won in 1987 with the Cubs, putting up a line of .287/.328/.568 with 49 home runs (in an era when nobody hit that many) and 137 rbi for a team that finished 76-85 and dead last in the division, 18.5 games out of first. Of course, Jack Clark probably should have won the MVP that year, and he played for a division winner, so the writers don't always follow any kind of recognizable logic. That will actually play in Mauer's favor - everybody likes him. Personal bias doesn't seem to affect baseball MVP voting as much as other sports (see Bonds with 7 MVPs and Jeff Kent actually won one), but it certainly won't hurt Golden Joe.

Of course, in recent years the trend has been to only give the MVP award to someone on a division winner, with the asinine argument that the award should go to the most valuable player and not the best player and that a great player on a bad team can't be valuable, so that doesn't help since this Twins squad might be the worst baseball team in the league since the Twins of 1999. I took a look at the AL MVP winners going back to 1990, and the team's the winners played on won their division 15 times, with another two wild card winners. That mean's there were two AL MVPs on teams that didn't win their division; 1991 Cal Ripken, and 2002 Alex Rodriguez.

Ripken's Orioles were 67-95, and finished 24 games out of first place. Ripken definitely deserved the award that year, as he was clearly the best player in the league. He put up .323/.374/.566, with 34 homers and 116 rbi, finishing in the top five in pretty much every category. Frank Thomas could make an argument, with a better OBP and OPS, but Ripken has him in every other category.

A-Rod's win in 2003 isn't quite as clear cut. He definitely had an outstanding year, hitting for .298/.396/.600 with 47 homers and 118 rbi for the 71-91 Rangers, while Carlos Delgado of the 86-76 Blue Jays hit .302/.426/.593 with 42 and 145. I have no idea why A-Rod won this one, but it goes to show that a player can win the MVP while playing for a losing team, even if he isn't the best player in the league that season (as 2 of the 3 I just looked at weren't).

Of course, it can go the other way too. You just have to look back at 2006, when David Ortiz should have won the award going away, but ended up finishing third behind Morneau and Derek Jeter, simply because the Red Sox missed the playoffs. A similar thing happened in 2004, too, this time to Manny Ramirez. His team didn't win the division (although they did win the Wild Card) and he lost MVP to Vlad Guerrero despite having superior numbers. And that seems to be the way the major sports are trending to go with their MVP awards in the past 10 years, but that A-Rod outlier means you can't rule it out just yet.

Is Mauer's season good enough to win? Right now, before today's game where once again I got to watch a Twins' starter completely implode and not bother to get out of the third, he is hitting .378/.446/.630. He also has 22 home runs, and 73 rbi through May, June, July, and almost exactly half of August. If we roughly project those out, we can reasonably expect Mauer to finish with 31 homers and 104 rbi. He is currently leading the league in batting average, on-base percentage, and slugging (and obviously OPS) - simply incredible, and maybe the best season a catcher has ever had.

.378 would be the highest batting average ever by a catcher (since Lave Cross's .394 in 1894). His .446 OBP would be the highest by a catcher since Mickey Cochrane's .452 in 1935, and the third best since 1900. Even his .630 slugging, long considered a weak point of his game, would rank third-best by a catcher ever, behind just 2003 Javy Lopez and 1997 Mike Piazza. All this leads up to an OPS of 1.076 - the best number a catcher has ever put up.

Even his home runs are nothing to dismiss, as if he hits 31 it would be the 31st most in a season by a catcher, and he would become just the 26th catcher to hit 30 in a season. And I'm tired of manually counting stuff up, but those 104 rbi would rank similarly in the history of catchers.

The only season that comes close is Mike Piazza's 1997, universally recognized as the best hitting season a catcher has ever had. That year Piazza hit .362/.431/.638 with 40 homers and 124 rbi, and finished second in the league in both OPS and MVP voting to Larry Walker. When you add in that Piazza had a noodle-arm, and Mauer is regarded as excellent defensively (not to mention his creepily squeaky-clean off the field reputation) there is little doubt Mauer is currently having the greatest season for a catcher in the history of baseball.

We've shown it's tough to win on a losing team, although it can be done, but we've also shown that Mauer is making history. He will have some obstacles, especially in that his three top rivals for the award either play in the cities that all media love (Youkilis and Texeira) or play on his own team and might steal votes (Morneau) but make no mistake, we are absolutely watching one of the most incredible seasons anyone has put together, and that should be enough for him to win.

Ready, Set...Major.

Alright golf fans I am back and better than ever. Sorry for going MIA for a month or so there but I got real lazy with my extra curricular activities. So needless to say there is a lot to talk about, I will try to hit on a bunch of points and try to leave you less bored than when you clicked on the site in the first place. And go.

-The first thing that pops in my head is Michelle Wie making the Solhiem Cup Team, this is the dykes version of the Ryder Cup. This makes me more sad for the state of women's golf in America than it does to have a win-nothing-clown represent our country. Here is a novel idea, since you shit canned the racist that hated the Ha-mungs and Orientals why dont you team up the best of USA and Europe vs Asia this way at least this way we can stay away from all the total no name randoms no one cares about from Europe and just stick to the ones from Asia.

-Ok, so Cink dusted off a man that could have been his dad, way to go you shit eating fag. You should have thrown the playoff, no one wanted you to win other than that tranny wife of yours.

Side note, I cannot stand chicks who feel the need to style their kids hair like their own. Secondly, why do women cut their hair when they start having kids, it looks horrible STOP!

Watson played awesomely for four days, he hit a 8I too flush and a putt off the green too firm. 2 shots out of a championship cost him, once again Stew you didn't win it, Tom lost it. Cink still sucks in my mind but he is confident and will likely keep winning, unfortunately. I could see him taking down a masters sometime soon.

-Tiger won the last two weeks, yawn. He beat down a no talent field in MI to close down the Buick Open. I soon see MI closing as a state and being sold to Canada, that place is worthless, but its gold to those damn Canadians, they need a Stanley Cup contender. Good luck to anyone still living there.

Tiger then was given the victory last week when Harrington didn't pull off a flop shot from over the green at the 16th at Firestone. There was a big controversy over the rules official for the group putting the group on "the clock". This rarely happens at tour events, unheard of at major events. The WGC events are major events, top fields, big crowds and huge money. I have no clue why that official on the 16th tee, with 1 stroke separating the top two players decided to put the players on the clock. Harrington seemed noticeably more fidgety than his already frosted flakes eating self. In the end he said "rules are rules", Tiger chastised the officials. Then out came the talk about fines.

Listen you idiot fringe fans or casual fans, this isn't Tiger's first fine. Although the PGA tour does not make their fines public, it is widely known that Tiger is at the top of the fine list. I have two actual ins on the tour, an agent and a caddie. Both have told me that these fines are common place and the tour polices its players. Everyone quit acting like Tiger is getting jobbed, he swears and throws clubs constantly OF COURSE they are going to fine him. A lot.

-Now to the PGA. Hazeltine is a monster, 7680 yards and since i don't want to look up if its the longest course in Major history or even just in PGA championship history, I am just going to go with that. Longest ever. Couple that with 5 inches of rain last weekend and that makes for a very long golf course. Some would contend that it takes the short or average length hitters out of the tournament, well I call those people morons. There is actually just as much of a premium on accuracy as there is on distance this week. Because not only is the course long but there are hundreds of well placed bunkers and thousands of trees, big trees.

Side note, I hate people talking about shit they have no idea about. Casual golf fans are famous for this, if you have spare time head out to the tournament this weekend and take a listen. Or read insanely dumb remarks like the one by 'dawger', 330 yards up hill huh, did you walk that off homo or just guess it by the time your girthy ass got to the ball you were out of breath so that's about 250 to 350 yards and you just gave yourself the benefit of the doubt? This is rhetorical. Also Phil just showed up on Wednesday for the first time, he didn't play on Tuesday. You are an idiot.

Also, dads, quit filling your kids heads full of false information. They will not love you any less if you say you are not sure or don't know. They don't need you to be their hero, if you cant be truthful to them at this point they probably have already written you off as a role model and you should just wait for the day when they don't return your calls.

-I truly needed to get that off my chest, whoa i feel good. So here are the guys in my top 5: Cabrera, Mahan, Westwood, Allenby and Martin Kaymer. Dark horse is Stenson. Blackout horse is Phil.

-In the end there will be one winner and 155 losers, let me tell you one of the loser's name is Tiger. He has won in every last tournament that he has entered before each major this year. Currently he is 0/3 you can book 0/4. One, he is still hitting it erratically off the tee, too much so to get it around at this course. Two, three in a row is pretty tough even for Tiger. I think he is a little gassed. Lastly, the odds are in my favor. So there.

I have to run, you can nit pick the grammar or spelling, it doesn't affect me. I hope to be writing more often as the season comes to a close, maybe.

Pay attention to 16, very tough for only 400 yards and 12 a 518 yard par 4, got a hybrid?

NF

PS--10 years ago a 19 year old pushed Tiger at the PGA, we all thought that kid would be pushing Tiger year after year. Sergio, where have you gone?

PPS-For some reason i could not get paragraph spaces to stick on the published version. sorry.

Monday Musings

- First off, as you can probably read right above this, Down with Goldy is now on Facebook. I'm not exactly sure why or what the point is, but most likely I will be updating the status whenever those little thoughts pop into my head that don't quite deserve a post of their own. So go be my friend. I promise you'll like it.

- In Gopher hoops news, it seems Tubby has stayed busy and made two offers to big men towards the end of May - which I somehow missed. The first went to noted ginger kid Alex Kirk out of New Mexico, who just picked up an offer from Arizona as well to go with his whole mess of Pac 10 offers. The second was to another big man, 6-11 center Elliott Eliason from Nebraska, where he was the high school player of the year last season. Eliason is on his way up, but Minnesota is probably his most impressive offer. Both of his home state schools have also given Elliott an offer (Nebraska and Creighton), and are said to be in the lead to gain his commitment.

Keeping up on the 2010 recruiting trail, it's obvious Tubby is really going after a big man or two. I can only assume it's because he expects Ralph Sampson to be heading pro after next season. Personally, I'm still awfully concerned about point guard. GET CORY JOSEPH. The problem? Louisville has said Joseph is their #1 target for the class. Yikes. I still don't think the program is quite there yet, but being legitimately in the game for guys like Joseph and Harrison Barnes is an awesome, awesome step, even if they don't get either of them.

- El Tigre won yet another tournament this weekend, this time the Memorial - the fourth time he's won at Muirfield Village. I was watching, and I was all prepared to write a post complimenting Jonathan Byrd, who held a two shot lead over Tiger, Jim Furyk, and Davis Love III through twelve holes. Despite the charge by Woods (he was -5 on the day at this point), Byrd just kept doin' it and doin' it and doin' it well, and was looking like he wouldn't follow Sean O'Hair and Alex Cejka as guys who recently collapsed with the lead on Sunday.

Of course, he then proceeded to three-putt for a bogey (including a miss from four feet) on 13 and double-bogeyed 14 to cough the lead right back up, before birdying fifteen to stay in the mix. It was very entertaining golf in the end, with Tiger, Furyk, Woods, and Byrd all holding the lead at different points before Tiger, of course, pulled away with back-to-back birdies on 17 and 18 with two of the best approach shots you're ever going to see. God he's freaky good. And it was awesome to see some good golf on Sunday instead of the usual collapses we've been seeing lately (yes, the two guys tied for the lead after 54 holes shot +1 and +3 to drop out of contention, but there were enough good players and good golf to make it a fun tournament.) US Open in two weeks at Bethpage should be awesome. And I already know who's gonna win. I can't tell you yet, he's quite the sleeper pick, but I'll let you know in a couple weeks.

- Watched some of the Twins game as well, which they lost of course because that's what they do, and at one point Mauer took a strike to fall behind in the count 1-2. Dick says, "Most hitters struggle with two strikes, but with Mauer the count doesn't even matter." Since I like accuracy, I naturally had to look it up to see if there was any truth to this, or if it was another example of Dick wildly throwing out words that may or may not be true.

Guess what? Dick was just making shit up. I know, I couldn't believe it either. For his career, Mauer hits .323/.405/.476, but with two strikes he drops to .262/.316/.379. Maybe he was talking about this year alone, you say? More of the same. Overall he's at .419/.507/.812, but with two strikes drops to .270/.343/.444.

So despite all anecdotal evidence to the contrary, Joe Mauer is a human being who is affected by many of the same things other mortal human hitters are, such as a 2-strike count. Consider my world rocked.

- We rented The Uninvited this weekend, and I would recommend it. It's a horror movie, a remake of a Japanese horror movie, about a hot chick (Emily Browning) who comes home from a mental institution to her hot sister (Arielle Kebbel), dad (the guy who played Eddie Cicotte) and his hot new, younger wife (Elizabeth Banks). There's a ghost, some scary dreams, and the hot sisters become convinced their new hot step mom killed their real mom - the event which sent sister #1 to the nut house. It's got some legit scary moments, and is more of a psychological thriller than a supernatural thriller, which gives it a nice edge. If you're looking for something to watch, you could do a lot worse.

- The MLB draft is Tuesday, and our beloved Twins are picking 22nd. The first mock draft I found by using the Google has them taking a high school outfielder named Evert Williams. I have no idea who that is. I have heard of only a handful of guys who are going to get drafted, and other than Stephen Strasburg that's only from a little bit of reading I did this weekend. After the draft, I'm sure I'll have more opinions as I read them from other people. As for the #22 pick, Glen Perkins was picked there by the Twins. David Aardsma, noted Twins killer, was a #22. As were Gil Meche, Rick Helling, Steve Karsay, and Jayson Werth. So it's impossible to get a good player at #22.

- Finally, I was watching the NBA Finals and J.J. Redick proving he's the only shooting specialist in the league who can't make a wide open shot, and they had one of those "Where Amazing Happens" commercials featuring this shot:


This shot continually appears on lists as one of the greatest moves of all-time, but can somebody please explain to me why? I didn't get it then, I didn't get it year after year when it is always replayed, and I still don't get it now.

First of all, it's not hard. In my very short basketball prime I couldn't jump and my strengths did not include athleticism, and yet I could go up with one hand and switch to the other and make the shot without much trouble. Secondly, he didn't even need to do it. There's no reason when he goes up with his right hand to even switch to the left. There's NOBODY there. Just lay it in with your right hand, show off.

Can anyone explain this to me? Is it just because it was Jordan and everybody wants to make out with him? Is it because Marv Albert reached Kevin Harlan levels of excitement? I don't get it. At all. And yet that play is always included in all sorts of all-time lists, so either everybody is an idiot or I just don't get it.

I'm open to all possibilities.

The Masters Preview

Since we seem to lose all our golf guys (ok, maybe a golf post every week was a little excessive) I'm going to have to take the reins here for a preview of The Masters, which begins tomorrow. Don't worry, there will be plenty of Twins talk to come.





The Favorite: Tiger Woods. Obviously. Tiger would almost certainly have been the favorite no matter what happened his last time out, but winning at Bay Hill two weeks ago tells the world know that he is all the way back. If you had to choose between Tiger and the Field, who would you pick? The field, obviously, but you'd at least have to think about it.

The Top 10 Contenders:

1. Paul Casey. Yes, I consider Casey your best bet to knock off Tiger this week. He's only played in the US three times this year, but those include a win at the Shell last week and a runner up finish in the Match Play Championship. Add in a 10th and 11th at the last two Masters, and a made cut in eight straight majors, and I think he's the guy to watch out for.

2. Zach Johnson. He won here two years ago, but then followed that up with a pretty mediocre 2008. It looks like the Hangover has abated, with Joaquin Phoenix's double having a pretty nice 2009, with a win at the Sony Open and five top 17s on the year.

3. Retief Goosen. Probably the best golfer at the Masters to never win the tournament, Goosen has finished in the top 3 here four times, and his career finishes since 2002 are very impressive: 2, 13, 13, 3, 3, 2, 17. He seemed to be on the downslope of his career last year, but has seen a resurgence this season with a win already at the Transitions Championship and another top 3 on the resume. This could be the year he finally gets his green jacket.

4. Phil Mickelson. Can't put Lefty any lower than this, and it was a tough call putting him even this low. Mickelson is incredibly uneven at times, but there's no doubting his ability when he's on. He also loves this tournament, with two wins and a total of eleven top 10s in 15 tries as a pro. If that's not enough, he's already got two wins this year, including a WGC event. I'm starting to wonder why I put him fourth.

5. Padraig Harrington. Since Paddy won his second straight Major at the PGA last year, he had been in coast mode, missing the cut in the next two tournaments and not finishing in the top 50 until March this year. The good news for Paddy fans is that he seems to be rounding into shape, with a 20th, 11th, and 26th in his last three. With the last two majors under his belt, and a 7th and 5th in his last two trips to Augusta, Harrington might get one step closer to the Paddy Slam.

6. Geoff Ogilvy. Ogilvy, despite a bit of a final round collapse last week, usually thrives in big tournaments, with four of his six career wins being either Majors (1) or WGC Events (3). He's also playing well right now, with two of those six career wins coming this season already. He's never seriously contended at Augusta (career best T-16th), but he's also never missed the cut here.

7. Mike Weir. Do you remember that Weir won here in 2003? Me neither. I always forget that and then realize it right before the tournament, and then realize again that Weir is pretty damn good at Augusta, with four top 20s in five tries since he won. He's also playing solid golf so far this season, with zero missed cuts and two top 3 finishes.

8. Nick Watney. I'm as surprised as you are to see this kid on the list, but he's burst on the scene in a big way this year, and has probably been the most consistent golfer so far this year. Watney has a win at the Buick and two other top 5 finishes. In fact, Watney has finished in the top 25 in seven of his eight tournaments this year. This is his second trip to Augusta, and he proved last year that he can handle it, finishing in a tie for 11th place. Stranger things have happened.

9. Robert Karlsson. I didn't know this until I was looking up his majors record on Wikipedia, but apparently he has two nicknames: "Ivan Drago" and "The Scientist." How awesome is that? If you need more, Karlsson finished in the top 10 in three of the four majors last year, including 8th at the Masters, finished 20th in the other Major, and won the European Order of Merit (the commie Player of the Year). He's also looking good, coming into the tournament with a T-14 finish last week.

10. Brandt Snedeker. He's not exactly having the best year, with as many missed cuts as made so far, but I have a hunch about the 2007 Rookie of the Year, particularly after he finished 17th his last time out at the Arnie Palmer. Snedeker generally plays well in Majors that aren't the British Open, with two top tens last year including a T-3 at Augusta.


10 "Contenders" Who Have No Shot:

1. Sergio Garcia. This pains me. If you pay attention to the Golf posts I make round here, you know I love the Sergio, but it's not his year, at least not at the Masters. The sexy Spaniard hasn't done much this year, with just one finish in the top 30, and the Masters is not where he's going to turn it around, with three missed cuts in his last four attempts here.

2. Vijay Singh. One of the more obvious "big" names to put on the list, the big Fiji has really struggled this year coming off knee surgery in January. Since his return, he has missed three cuts and finished 53rd and 59th. The Masters is generally not a place where players return to form, and Singh's streak of 10 straight top 25 finishes here is in jeopardy.

3. Luke Donald. As long as we're talking injuries, let's talk Donald's wrist. Luke had wrist surgery and missed the second half of the season last year, and then had to withdraw from the Match Play Event due to wrist trouble again. He's played in two tournaments since then, and managed a top 20 at the WGC, but comes in with a MC at the Houston Open. He also missed the cut at Augusta last year.

4. Adam Scott. Here's another one who is trying to return from an injury, and not at all succeeding. Scott injured himself surfing last December (note: Surfing is stupid. You look like a seal from below. Sharks eat seals. Ergo, if you surf, sharks will eat you) and hasn't hit his stride in his return, coming into the Masters on the heels of missed cuts in his last two events. Considering he's never finished better than 25th here since 2003, I don't see this being his big return event.

5. Jim Furyk. I never thought there would be a tournament where I'd consider Furyk to not be a factor, but since a 3rd place finish at the last WGC event, he's played really poorly, finishing 52nd and missing the cut in his last two times out. In fact, in the last six rounds he's played he's only broken 70 once, and has carded two separate rounds of 78. Add in that he hasn't really contended at Augusta since 2003, and I don't think this is Jimmy's week.

6. Ernie Els. Unlike Goosen, who seems to have pulled himself out of a career decline, the same can't really be said for Els, who has won only once since 2004. It's not that he's playing terrible golf, but he just doesn't really seem to ever be a serious threat to win anymore, much less at a major. Particularly Augusta, considering he's missed the cut the past two years.

7. Anthony Kim. Remember when Kim was the next big thing? He was one of the hottest golfers last season, picking up two wins and finishing fourth in the Fed Ex Cup Playoffs. He started out hot again this year, with a second place finish in the first tournament of the year, but has really cooled since then with nary a top 25 finish to his name. Add in that this is his first trip to Augusta, and I'm not seeing it.

8. Stewart Cink. People like Cink. People like blood sausage, too. People are morons. I can't stand this guy. Sure, he finished 3rd last year at Augusta, but he's sucked all year, with a 24th place finish his best, has only won once since 2004, and generally chokes anytime he's in contention for anything except for biggest homo on the tour. Want more? He named his two sons Connor and Reagan, and has a twitter account or page or whatever it is. H-O-M-O.

9. Steve Stricker. Speaking of choking when the pressure is on, holy cow has Stricker had his hands around his throat this year. On paper, his three top fives already this year look great, but consider that he had the lead at one point in all three of those tournaments and gave it back. Google "Steve Stricker chokes" and you'll see a ton of hits. Sound like a guy who can handle the pressure of the final round of the Masters? Add in that he's missed the cut here in five of his eight tries, including his last three attempts, and you can rule him out.

10. Kenny Perry. The Dan Akroyd clone may have had a good year last year, but he did it playing only one round in a major: he didn't qualify for the Masters or the US Open (and didn't attempt to), declined to play in the British, and got hurt after one round at the PGA. Perry is playing well this year (four top-10s already) but his lack of success at Augusta (five missed cuts in 8 tries), unfamiliarity with the course and tournament (hasn't played in the Masters since 2005), and overall lack of Major experience (only played five rounds total in the last 8 majors) tell me to stay away.


THE WILDCARD:

- Rory McIlroy. If you pay attention to golf, you know who this is. If you don't, he's the next young challenger to Tiger Woods, or at least is being portrayed that way. He's a 19-year old kid from Northern Ireland, and has already risen to the #17 ranked golfer in the world rankings. He already won in Dubai earlier this year, and finished 5th at the Accenture Match Play to go along with three other top 20s in the states. Simply put, he's young, he's untested in a Major, and by all rights shouldn't be in contention. However he's played well this year under pressure, seems completely unflappable and in control at all times, and is supremely talented. Really, I have no idea how to place him. I had him in both the Top Contenders and Players With No Chance categories at different points when I was thinking about this. Nothing would shock me.


There you have it. As a reward, here's a fun little picture of Natalie Gulbis:

Weekend Review

Well I'm stupid. I could put myself in the WHO SUCKED column, seeing as I'm pretty much in the bottom 10% of bracket guessers this year, but I'm not going to. Instead I'm going to tell you to be careful about overthinking when it comes to these stupid things, because in my original bracket I had UCONN, Villanova, and UNC (along with Louisville) all in the final four, and talked myself out of it. I hate myself so much sometimes I have to cut myself to feel. At least UND lost. Suck it car in front of me this morning with the customized Sioux license plate "GR8 SK8". And also Super Sioux Fan.


WHO WAS AWESOME

1. Villanova. It pains me, quite literally pains me to put them here, but it's hard to argue with a 3 seed heading to the final four, and they've done it in very impressive fashion too. They followed up a second round depantsing of UCLA last weekend with a stomping of Duke like Duke was that Kentucky guy and they were Christian Laettner on Thursday, and then a great win over Pitt to get into the final four. I don't really think they're a threat to win the whole thing, but stranger things have happened. They have a ton of weapons and just one major liability (Scottie Reynolds), but the man who really makes things happen for the Wildcats is Dante Cunningham. I only remembered him as a side note to the good Nova team of a couple of years ago with Allan Ray, Lowery, Foye, and that white guy, but it turns out he was Nova's leading scorer this year. And, after watching him for three rounds now, the guy is really, really good.

2. Goran Suton and Durrell Summers. On a night where the defense of the Spartans was the real star, these two clowns really stepped up when the usual offensive catalyst of the team, Kalin Lucas, had an off night to get Michigan State the win and the trip to the final four. I figured if Lucas was off and the Spartans still won, it would be the most feared man in the Big Ten, Chris Allen, who went off, but he sucked too (2pts on 1-5 shooting) as did the highly overrated Raymar Morgan (0 pts, 4 fouls). Luckily, Suton was there in the first half, scoring 17 of the teams 30 points, hitting from outside (3-3 on threes), mid-range, and in the paint and generally looking like the second coming of Jamie Feick. When Suton cooled off in the second half, Summers took over and did his Allen impersonation, scoring 10 second half points including 8 during a quick 17-7 run by Sparty that put them up 15 with just five minutes to play. I don't think they can get it done against UCONN, but I've been saying that for three rounds now and also I'm an idiiot.

3. North Carolina. I guess the Heels wanted to remind everybody why they were the consensus pick to win the championship at the beginning of the season. They made sure neither of their games were ever in doubt this weekend, destroying my sleeper who I swear I still think is good Gonzaga by 20 and then Oklahoma by 12 in a game that wasn't anywhere near that close. Ty Lawson is playing incredible ball right now, even making a jump shot here and there, and if he can keep playing at that level I don't know that anybody can beat the Heels. And wow, turned out his foot was miraculously just fine. Watch that turn into a big story line this week. Yawn.

4. UCONN. I suppose if I'm going to highlight three of the four final four teams I may as well hit the fourth, although for whatever reason the Huskies impressed me least this weeekend. I'm not exactly sure why, maybe it's because Purdue just looked so damn awful in their first game, but the win over Missouri is definitely impressive. Fun fact about that game - the Tigers missed a layup at the buzzer that would have cut the margin to 5, and the spread was 5.5. Would have been fun to be in a Vegas Sportsbook for that one.

5. Tiger Woods. What more is there to say about this dude? Yet another comeback victory, this time without the fake injury dramatics, and this time at Bay Hill at the Arnold Palmer invitational. He was down five strokes going into the final round yesterday to Sean O'Hair, and ended up winning on a 15-foot birdie putt on 18 to put him ahead by one, winning his first tournament since his "dramatic" win at the US Open last year and "real not faked" knee surgery. Woods put some serious pressure on O'Hair right out of the gate by birdying two of the first three holes, and O'Hair responded poorly (more on that later), but give credit where it's due. Woods saved several pars from the sand, and made a whole assload of long putts to first get him back in the game, and then take the lead, and then - after giving the lead away - taking it back for the win. I quite seriously think he has a shot at all four majors this year.



WHO SUCKED

1. Arizona. I suppose it's a little bit rough to pick on a twelve seed that managed to get to the sweet 16, but what about if they were a team that pretty much underachieved all year and then got a cherry path to the round of 16? Like Arizona, I mean. Getting Utah as their #5 was very fortunate for them, since the Utes are not a very athletic team and that's Arizona's strength, and then to get lucky enough to have Cleveland State beat Wake in the first round was a huge boost - Wake would have won by 20. Keep in mind that Zona didn't just lose to Louisville, they lost 103-64. So you know, that's a 39 point loss. For a team with Nic Wise, Jordan Hill, and Chase Budinger. Unfortunately, even with that kind of firepower you still have to play defense once you play a good team, and letting Louisville shoot 58% is not playing defense, except maybe in the Pac 10 - which sucks.

2. Duke. Holy crapoly did Duke ever suck against Villanova. We can even just go ahead and ignore the fact that they lost 77-54, and instead just concentrate on the fact that your precious little Blue Devils shot 26.7% for the game, including 18.5% from three. Gerald Henderson was 1-14. Jon Scheyer was 3-18. Kyle Singler was 5-13. When you only have three scorers, and those three dingleberries account for 60% of the teams scoring and are the only three averaging more than 9 per game, and those three happen to suck, you're pretty much screwed. Oh, and getting outrebounded 46-32 doesn't help. So freaking glad I picked these idiots to make the final four. God I suck. You know who else sucks? Duke. Fun fact: Duke hasn't beaten a team seeded better than fifth since 2001.

3. Terrence Williams. Williams played great for the Cardinals in their blowout 103-64 win over Arizona, but in the biggest game of the year for Louisville, he really didn't come to play, shooting just 1-7 for a total of five points, and finishing below his season average in both rebounds and assists as well. Louisville as a team didn't exactly play well anyway, shooting just 38% and getting out rebounded 35-26 against Michigan State. Interestingly, the Cardinals previous three opponents in the tournament were ranked 134th, 79th, and 145th in defensive efficiency, and then suddenly they get Michigan State who was ranked 10th, and you could see they had trouble handling a team defense that solid. Their only other matchup this year against a top 10 defensive team was against UCONN, and they dropped that one too.

4. Willie Warren. A lot of people, myself included, said Warren would be the real key to how far the Sooners would make it in the tournament. Blake Griffin is pretty clearly the best player in the country, but he's pretty much surrounded by idiots like Fro-Hawk and Long Sleeve T-Shirt Guy. Warren is the one other player on the team who can do some damage, and he clearly declined that option this weekend. He started out by scoring just six points in their sweet 16 round win over the Cuse, also turning it over five times (to go with five assists). The Sooners still managed to win that one because they have Blake Griffin, but Carolina was too much for him to do alone as Warren decided once again not to show up. He ended up with 18 points on 6-16 shooting, but at one point he was 1-9, and scored most of his points while the Sooners were well out of it already. He's going to be a good player down the road, but this was not Warren's finest weekend.

5. Sean O'Hair. He led pretty much the entire week at Bay Hill, and came into Sunday's final round with a five stroke lead over his closest competitor, El Tigre, but then proceeded to give a clinic on how not to play with a five stroke lead. He played tight, he played passively, he played weak, and generally tried to just play caretaker with his lead, and it most definitely didn't work out for him as Tiger won in the end thanks to O'Hair's round of +3 compared to Tigers -3. He came out completely passive, hitting irons to the middle of the green rather than going anywhere near the flag, giving him little chance for birdies, and hit several long putts well short, as if he was afraid to knock it too far passed the hole - even missing one of the four footers he left himself to end up with a bogie. He also had a nice easy 7-iron from the fairway on 16 that he somehow managed to knock in the water, giving Tiger his first lead of the tournament. Tiger made the shots he needed to and O'Hair didn't, but it was more his style of play than anything else that doomed him yesterday.

Crazy roun' here.

I've been very busy with no chance to write, so I apologize to those of you have been refreshing tens of times per day, hoping against hope that there is a new post up. It would be great if Snake, Dawg, or Sidler would type something, anything, but alas, no such luck. Thoughts on some recent happenings:

- So that US Open was kind of a good time, huh? Got a whole lot of people interested in golf, if only for the weekend. On Monday my boss actually pulled the whole office (all five people) into the conference room to watch the end on TV - of course, I already had it up on the computer, but I joined them for office harmony's sake.

I still say Tiger was faking a little. Seriously, I wish I had it on tivo so I could go back through and see what the results were each time he acted like he was in pain vs. when he didn't. I bet there would be a pretty interesting pattern there. And for every Pat Forde, who advises those calling Tiger a drama queen to shut up (um, Pat, have you ever ready any of your own articles?), there's a Retief Goosen who backs up my opinion. And who would know better than another golfer? In any case, seeing as Tiger is shutting it down for the year, my decision to not pick him in fantasy golf last week to save a start is getting worse and worse.

Lastly on golf, for those out there calling Tiger a poor role model for throwing his club in the sand after a bad shot, get a grip. I could write pages and pages about the stupidity of that opinion, but I'm tired, so I'll just say if you are upset at Tiger for throwing his club, you are a freaking moron.

- Speaking of morons, how about the whole Kobe/Jordan debate? I know 8 billion people have written up this angle already, so I won't waste your time any more than I already am. Actually, if you're reading this, you're intentionally trying to waste time, so I'll say a bit.

Now, the legend of Michael Jordan has grown since his retirement, and memories have a tendency to color things in the best possible light and build legends into greater and greater icons over time, but when people say, "Jordan would never get blown out by 40 in the Finals" or "Jordan's teams would never blow a 24 point second half lead in the finals", they're right. And it's not because of his "force of will." What the hell does that even mean? You can't will a team to do anything unless you have magic powers like Harry Potter or Jesus. You can, however, inspire a team due to your leadership. Make no mistake, Jordan could be a jerk at times, but he also commanded respect from his teammates. With Kobe, he's a jerk all the time, and you get the feeling his teammates all hate him - and probably his kids too. Jordan matured, so it's not like it's too late for Kobe to mature into a competent leader, but he's got a long way to go.

Hey, I just flipped on the Twins' game and saw Delmon Young chase the first pitch of the at-bat - which was outside - and hit a weak groundball. Weird.

Anyway, I'm clearly in the "happy for KG" camp, as opposed to the "F KG" camp, so I'm pretty happy for him, weird, rambling, semi-coherent interview aside. Not to mention Pierce and Shuttlesworth. The worst thing ever is the idiotic Minnesota fans calling into radio shows saying how if we could have kept Ray Allen instead of trading him for Marbury this could have been our championship. Hey idiots, two problems - 1. They'd still be missing a Paul Pierce, the #1 reason they won the title (KG was the #1 reason they got there, Pierce why they won), and 2. they never wanted Allen, he was going to be traded to Mi-lee-wau-kay (Algonquin for "the good land") from the get go. If the Wolves were going two guard, they were going with Kerry Kittles who, like most Wolve picks, is out of the league.

- The NBA Draft is right around the corner (please pick Jerryd Bayless) and, as usual, there are some very bad decisions being made. Some of the worst would be CJ Giles (Oregon State), Kalen Grimes (Missouri), Reggie Huffman (UAB), Shawn James (Duquesne), and Walter Sharpe (UAB) - none of whom are likely to be drafted at all. Two very curious decisions are Luc Richard Mbah a Moute from UCLA, Davon Jefferson of USC, and Bill Walker of Kansas State. Mbah a Moute has decided not to withdraw his name, despite no assurances of being drafted at all. Mbah a Moute has been a quality player for UCLA, but needs another year to shake of injury concerns and hone is offensive game. Jefferson had an awesome freshman season, playing with OJ Mayo, but did not distinguish himself enough to be lotto material. After a poor showing at the Orlando predraft camp, he's looking like a second rounder and should have pulled out and given himself a year to improve. Walker hurt his knee in a private workout for the Hornets, and remained in the draft nonetheless. He missed most of the year two seasons ago with a knee injury, recovered and played well last season and was looking like a late first round selection. Now, having not played in Orlando and having only two private workouts, he's almost certainly going to slip into the second round based on injury concerns. Another year with K State, with him being the man, could have vaulted him into the lotter if he could have stayed heatlhy.

There were some smart players who pulled out, including Antonio Anderson, Chase Budinger, and AJ Abrams, who will all have the chance to prove they are big time players and improve their draft position. Other good choices were Derrick Caracter of Louisville (needs to show more consistency and discipline), Ty Lawson (needs to show he can shoot), Robert Vaden (better ballhandling skills), and Lester Hudson (play against better competition).

- It's nice to see Cristian Guzman back in the metrodome, the same place that destroyed his soul and his game back in the second half of 2001. What a complete fall off the map. And the Nationals signed him in 2004 for four years, $17 million. He managed to play 142 games his first year with them, and hit .219/.260/.314 on his way to an OPS+ of 53 (almost identical to last year's Punto), the worst among regular players that year. Then missed all of 2005 and 75% of 2006 with an injury - all while makeing $4.2 million each year. And guess what, he's in a contract year now, so of course he's hitting .316 with some power, and will likely be the Nationals' All-Star representative. In a contract year, imagine that.

- What is up with the roller bags for laptops now? Seriously, it's gotten to the point where people can't even carry a laptop bag on their shoulder? I get it for girls, since they have a purse and what not, but for dudes? Come on guys, get it together.

- Finally, since I know you want it, here's the latest picture of baby W.

aaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhh, how cute.

Happy Father's Day

To me. After an excellent Father's Day breakfast of donuts and bacon (jealous?), I'm now planted on the couch with the little one with plans to watch the Twins/Brewers, US Open, and NBA Finals.

- Enough with the bunting. Enough.

- I love how when Mauer sits Gardy doesn't have the energy to bother shuffling the batting order and just plugs Redmond in the three hole. I don't know if it's laziness or stupidity (such as, "I can't move anyone else around it'll throw them off!!) I don't know which would be worse, but what I do know is that Gardy is not a good manager.

- Unfortunately, Delmon Young has the day off so I don't get to watch him flail about, but I want to mention that Snacks is a huge Young fan. This weekend I was called a "hater" and told "he's only 22." So please, next time you watch Delmon chase a ball a foot outside, go after the slider in the dirt, or hit a groundball nine consecutive at bats, just remember that Snacks is in love with him.

- I'm going to write something about college basketball next week, I promise.

- Scottie Baker "The Touchdown Maker" just gave up a double to the Brewer's pitcher. That seriously has to be the worst thing in the world. Even worse than giving up a hit to Adam Everett.

- I chose Phil Mickelson and Sergio Garcia over Tiger for fantasy golf this week. That's looking like a pretty major mistake. Dammit. I hope his knee falls off.

- On Channel 101 on DirectTV is the "Championship Gaming Series Draft Show." This is a group of teams, drafting people to play on their video gamer teams to compete in the North American Gaming series. Sample analysis, "So do you go with a DOA Male to compliment your female, or do you go with a driver here to fill out your squad." Chris "NinjaCW" Harris was just picked, and he goes up to a podium and gets a hat and shirt and all that. Totally surreal.

- US Open has now officially been on for fifteen minutes and we have yet to see a single shot. Enough with the blah blah already.

- How about the choke job by Appleby yesterday? Nobody's talking about it due to Tiger's brilliance and the fact that it was Saturday and not Sunday, but tossing up a +8 when you're leading the US Open is Normanesque. And not just the +8, but the way he did it. He missed AT LEAST four putts under five feet. I'm guessing he doesn't recover for a while, he's kind of a sensitive emo dude and probably cried himself to sleep last night.

- The front page of the leaderboard sucks. You have Tiger (boring), Lee Westwood (commie), Rocco Mediate (probably gay), Geoff Ogilvy (definitely gay), DJ Trahan (I barely know who this is), Camilo Villegas (the most annoying golfer on tour), Robert Karlsson (commie), and Miguel Angel Jimenez (gay commie). I'm going to have to root for someone on page two to make a miracle run. Let's go with, um, say, Sergio Garcia.

- Also Scott Baker is very good. 8 K's through five, including four in the third inning alone. Jason Kubel is awesome too. Where are all the haters now? HATERS!!1 He should probably be an all-star.

- Mrs. W's contribution, "Cuddyer doesn't look like a Michael. He looks like an Andy." Weirdly, I agree.

- I understand it's sad that Tim Russert died or whatever, but do we really need a ten minute segment on him during the US freaking Open? I don't mean to be an insensitive ass, but there's a time and place people, a time and a place. They better break into news tonight whenever somebody birdies a hole. Meanwhile I see Brian Bass is in with the Brewers up 3-2, so I'm going to go ahead and mark down a Brewers' win here.

- The dream is over right away, as on the par 3 third hole Sergio pumps in right into some crap, then sails it over the green on shot two and ends up with a double. I'm now officially rooting for Lee Westwood. God I'm so sick of Tiger. They've spent more time on the telecast thus far talking about stupid Tiger crap than they have showing any of the other golfers. He's like Brett Favre, but actually good. It's just like, enough already, there are other golfers out there. I really don't need to know about Tiger and his mom's spiritual relationship.

- Dennys Reyes is the new Rich Garces.

- Tiger doubles the first, hitting a tree twice. Of course, his very first hole of the tourny was a double as well, so this doesn't necessarily mean much, except that it was to watch him struggle like a weekend hacker.

- He follows that up with another shanked tee shot and a three putt to bogey number 2, including a missed four foot par putt. So far he's looking like Appleby from yesterday, hopefully he'll keep it up. He's already wincing and making fake grimaces when the camera is on him, just so he can blame the knee if he ends up not winning. What a prima donna. Oh, so the knee is fine when he shoot -3 through three rounds, but two bad holes and suddenly it hurts? You're no Lance Harbor, sir. If only somebody would make a run, but Garcia can't seem to make a birdie anywhere.

- In case you missed it, Jordan Crawford is leaving Indiana. This now leaves the Hoosiers and new coach Tom Crean with exactly two returning players and one scholarship player in Kyle Taber, who averaged 1.3 points and 2.5 rebounds per game last year. What a mess.

- Luke Donald officially withdraws from the Open after injuring his wrist on the fourth hole. How do you get hurt playing golf you ask? I wouldn't have believed it either, but a friend of mine, we'll call him Park, once hurt his wrist golfing and had to sit out an entire summer of baseball. And he was a baseball stud, and was lucky to break 120 golfing. Of course, he was always the kind of kid who, despite being an incredible natural athlete, could also manage to get hurt doing just about anything. He was like Fred Taylor or, if you prefer something a bit more provincial, Michael Bauer.

- Sergio sucks.

- Lee Westwood just had a birdie putt that would have put him up 2 on Tiger here on the 8th hole, and Tiger stood in his line of sight. Seriously, like right there. While prima donna Tiger backs off his shot if a bird chirps or the wind blows. So he's a baby, a faker, a whiner, and a cheater. Real role model there. What an ass.

- Naturally, Westwood misses. Seriously, nobody can putt today. And Tiger takes the lead. So, there's that. It's pretty much over. I can't wait for the basketball.

- Wow, I just came back and somehow Mediate is back in front of Tiger by a shot. How'd that happen? Go Rocco! Also, if you live in the North St Paul area, you should order Rocco's Pizza. Thin crust, sausage and pepperoni. It's very thin and cut into squares. Money.

- Here's a new one. Tiger missed a par putt by a few millimeters left, and announcer guy says, "It hit something. It hit something on the green and didn't break as much as it was supposed to." Then we go over the replay, and he narrates how it hit something. But it didn't. It never hit anything. It just didn't break that much. It was seriously just like Madden making excuses for a Brett Favre interception. The guy is the greatest golfer in history, but he does actually miss putts without anything crazy happening. He just missed. It's ok. It happens. Sheesh.

- El Tigre sinks his birdie putt on 18, and he and Mediate will be playing 18 tomorrow to determine the winner. Wow. That's a bit of a mismatch. Tiger by 6 strokes.

- Basketball prediction: Due to being down 3-1, the Lakers are demoralized. Since their leader, Kobe, is not from the "inspirational leader" school of leadership and is more from the "I'm a complete dick" school, they struggle from the get go. In the second quarter (or earlier), Kobe is done with his teammates and goes into full on ballhog take over the game mode. It might work, and it might not, but expect Kobe to take over 30 shots tonight, for good or for ill.

- Rajon Rondo has officially become Jacque Vaughn. Drove all the way into the lane and had a wide open layup, but for some unknown reason kicked it out to Paul Pierce instead - who missed. He apparently has decided he has the shooting touch of Jonathan Williams.

- Well, the Lakers certainly haven't come out flat nor demoralized, up 24-12 quickly. Kobe does have 8 shots in under 8 minutes, so that prediction is looking good, unlike pretty much every other prediction I've ever made. Go JP Losman!

- Ray Allen has, without question, the prettiest jumpshot ever. Look:

See?

- Whatever happened to former Big Ten POY Brian Cook? The dude from Illinois? He was a Laker for a while, and seemed to be kind of being not terrible, but now the Lakers are playing super stiff Chris Mihm over him.

- Here's your answer. He has his own website (actually I don't know if it's by him, but it's certainly dedicated to him) and he was traded in the offseason from the Lakers to Orlando. He pretty much sucked, averaging 5 points and 2 rebounds per game in 12 minutes, and got hurt right before the playoffs. I guess there's not that much of a market for a seven foot tall three point specialist, unless you're Sam Perkins.

- I keep forgetting to mention that Brendan Harris is my new favorite Twin. Sports Illustrated does a thing in each episode where they ask four athletes some pop culture/everyday life types of questions. In this one mag, Harris was one of the guys and the question was, "What do you never leave the house without?" and some of the answers were like "My wallet" or "pictures of my family", but Harris's answer was "My flask." You gotta love that.

- 55-52 at half. Kobe has slowed down, with only 12 attempts. Expect that number to sky rocket in the second half, as he feels more and more of a sense of urgency.

- Semi-Pro is a gigantic turd of a movie. Don't waste your time. Watch Anchorman again instead.

- No matter how hard I try, I just cannot get into NBA basketball. Is impossible.

- You can tell Vujacic is a Euro, after a jump ball he goes down hard, and curls up in the fetal position like a European Soccer Player. Very girly.

- Lakers up two with five minutes left, and Kobe doesn't touch the ball the entire possession. Inconceivable. I thought Phil Jackson was some kind of genius.

- I really don't like Will Smith. Does that make me a racist? I'm ok with that, just wondering.

- KG misses two free throws that would have tied it up with 2 and a half remaining. Sigh. Let the anti-clutch opinions keep coming - he keeps living up to them, sadly.

- Those shooting sleeves are the gayest things ever. EVER.

- Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeah Lakers! Great, now I'll have to force myself to watch at least one more game. Awesome.