Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Game 1 - Yankees/Twins running Diary

I just finally got the baby to sleep (for how long who knows, stay tuned) but I'm just now able to put some thoughts down on virtual paper here for your game 1 Yankees v. Twins matchup.  We're in the bottom of the second, and here is what I have to say so far:

-  I really hate sac bunting in the first, especially with the second batter of the game.  If the pitcher just doesn't have it early, you're giving him a free out.  Plus, there's that whole thing about how sac bunts don't really help you very often, which has been statistically proven.

-  Liriano pees his pants when Marcus Thames is up.

-  Sabathia intentionally throwing at Thome because of that one time when they played together in Cleveland and Thome didn't invite him to a BBQ party at his house.

-  If Cuddy was saving it for the playoffs this year, I'm ok with that.  Although he owes us about 10 more based on his play all season.

-  So that's where we stand.  2-0 Twins, Liriano looking mostly good.  Sabathia just struck out Valencia who did an awfully good impression of someone who has never seen a slider before.  CC looks good, I have a hunch he's on tonight, but after intentionally beaning Thome because he slept with his wife he made his one mistake to Cuddy and luckily he was able to take advantage, so Liriano needs to keep this up and keep the Twins ahead because I don't think they're going to get much more.

-  Tonight's drink of choice:  Three Philosophers beer.  To be followed by Coors Light.

-  Double for Hardy, which proves that all of you who questioned me when I said the Twins had the advantage at shortstop can now suck it.

-  Slower Vince Coleman swings like a girl - again.  Inning over.

-  So I had the most fantastically interesting dinner last night.  We went to Vincent with work, the kind of thing I desperately miss with my new job, since if you pay way to much attention here you know I used to get fancy dinners all the time (along with a lot of fun travel) that I don't anymore, so I was really looking forward to it, and I ended up trying several things I'd never had.

We opened with appetizers both comforting (baked camembert) and exotic (escargot), and I did end up trying the snails, which was my first time ever.  They basically drenched them in a garlic butter sauce (to mask the taste) and serve them boiling hot (to mask the texture) which leads to me to ask why exactly people eat them at all, but I tried them and other than being hot they were fine.  Of course, I mostly tasted garlic butter, which I think was the point.  Back to the game, more about the meal later.

-  Leadoff walk to Gardner.  This, frankly, sucks, and Liriano is doing that thing where he looks scard to throw a strike, nibbles nibbles nibbles, and walks a bunch of guys.  At least Jeter's up, this is a double play waiting to happen.

-  OMG throw a strike asshole.

-  Base hit Jeter.  First and second nobody out and I want to cry.  That's the second 0-2 count he's had where he's allowed the runner to reach base.  I can't help but feel like we've got the bad Liriano tonight.

-  Two fly outs and a K of A-Rod that left him looking absolutely silly.  So maybe we have the good Liriano, although I'm starting to suspect they are one in the same.

-  TNT just let us know Sabathia and Orlando Hudson are good friends dating back to 1999 when they were teammates in the Sally League.  I wonder what color skirts they wore and who baited the hook when the went fishing.  Base knock, Hudson.

-  Mauer grounds out with Hudson running and slides into first like an idiot (but is out), but noone of that matters because O-Hud ends up taking third like Jake Taylor on a bunt.  Brilliant play.  I guess Hudson skirt is the color of rocket fuel and veteran savvy.  And he just scored on a wild pitch, 3-0 Twins.  I'm starting to feel good and I hate it.

-  Ron Darling, one of our announcers tonight, "Along with throwing, giving up passed balls has been a big weakness of Posada this year."  So what, exactly, is left?  I know.  I bet he always invites Sabathia to the BBQs at his house.

-  Favorite text so far tonight, courtesy of Snacks, "I will commit murder at a twins game someday due to bathroom etiquette rules."

-  Liriano gets Thames out.  Everything is coming up Millhouse.

-  Great inning for Liriano, which brings me back to my great meal.  The next course I had was a poached eggs with a salted cod puree, bell peppers, and little slices of some kind of sausage.  I'm not usually an egg fan, at all, but the other option for this course was a pureed soup of root vegetables, and I do not like pureed soups, so I went with this.  The accompaniments were good enough to offset my usual distaste for egg, and I thought it was quite good, although not very exciting.  More coming up.

-  Here's an idea - the Twins sign Carl Crawford for next year, trade Kubel or Delmon for a pitcher, and outright cut Cuddyer.  Who's in?

-  Next course I was really tempted to go with the white fish, because there's nothing more I like than a really well cooked piece of fish (other than maybe properly cooked, rock-salted prime rib with a well seasoned au jus) but I just couldn't bring myself to pass on the wild boar because, really, when am I going to have wild boar again?  It was pretty good, stringy to be sure and the closest taste I can come up with to it would be beef jerky (which is not remotely an insult) but overall quite good and I'm glad I had it.  Also came with brussel sprouts which I had also never tasted, and these were pretty outstanding.  I don't know if they were just good plain or if it was the squash puree mixed with them, but I was impressed.

-  1-2-3 for Liriano including a couple of strikeouts and he's back to looking sharp.  I'm really glad I didn't jump in my car, drive to Target Field, hop the fence, run on to the field and tackle and/or choke Liriano whilst yelling "They can't hit you asshole!" Not that I was contemplating it.  Barely even warmed up the car.

-  Oh, and FYI - I'm chatting with a Yankee fan as I watch, and if he's any representation of that team they are really, really down on this year's squad and don't feel remotely confident.  As in, win this first game and the fans, if not the team, will curl up and die faster than a snail in a boiling vat of garlic butter.  My biggest concern is who pitches the 8th.  That inning is going to make or break this game.

-  Easy inning for Sabathia, and through five these are a couple of good pitching performances, although nothing compared to Halladay's no-hitter earlier today.  Which, incidentally, is what the announcers for this game just talked about for that entire half-inning.  So, to recap, three idiots who get paid handsomely to do a job I could do much better, just spent an entire inning talking about a game that was already over.  Brilliant.  And I know everybody thinks they could be a better announcer than the actual announcers, and most of you are wrong, but I actually could be better.  I'd be the next Jack Buck (NOT Joe) crossed with a little Vin Scully and a dash of Keith Olbermann back when he was good combined with Brad Pitt's looks and Brad Pitt's body.

-  Texeira double here in the top 6 with one out.  It's still 3-0, and now I'm terrified Liriano is going to walk A-Rod because he's scared to set up the 3-run, game tying HR.  Seriously, if that happens this is a sweep.  No way the Twins could survive having the momentum yanked out from under them like that.

-  Indeed, he walks A-Rod (although I'm pretty certain that ball four was a strike).  Game all set to be tied here.  Full expecting my heart to be ripped out.

-  Base hit by Cano, 3-1.  I don't think I can do this.  Might have to just change the channel for a while.

-  Strikes out Thames, which has to be huge pyschologically since that guy hits everything Liriano throws, and hits it a ton.  Now it's Posada, and Franky is at 97 pitches so you know Gardy's hair trigger is getting itchy.

-  Old man time with a base hit to score one, now 3-2 Twins, runners on first and second for Granderson, who should probably strike out on 3 pitches.  Christ, guy has no clue where the strike zone is anyway.

-  Granderson off the wall.  Yanks lead 4-3.  I'm done.  Fuck this.

-  Oh my sweet christ Sabathia walked in the tying run after walking Valencia on four straight pitches.  How can that possibly happen?  And with two outs after having struck Valencia out twice already.  Just throw it down the middle and odds are he pees his pants.

-  Tied heading to the seventh, just waiting to see if it's Guerrier or Crain who loses the game.  In the meantime, I'll tell you about my dessert.  I went with the Nutella crepe with vanilla ice cream and I have to tell you this might have been the best thing I've ever eaten.  I had never had Nutella, but I know it's popular in certain places, and it was certainly popular with my mouth last night. The warm chocolatey crepe combined with the cold vanilla ice cream was perfect, and I'm not a dessert guy at all.  No chance I would have ordered it on my own if it wasn't part of our Prix Fixe menu.  And I'm damn glad it was.  Outstanding.

-  Crain on.  Hopefully he'll be the Nutella Crepe in my garbage can of my life.

-  Now I'm done for real.

1 comment:

the todd said...

Holy christ, this is a hysterical read after it all went down.