Welcome Aboard, Joey King (this year!)

Just read on the Twitter machine that Joey King, the 6-9 sophomore power (?) forward transfer from Drake, has been granted a waiver making him eligible  for this season.  King, originally from Eagan, transferred home to be closer to a sick family member who I can't recall, and the NCAA actually gave the Gophers some good news, giving a badly needed boost to the Gopher front court.

King, one of those fancy pants stretch fours everybody's talking about these days, averaged 6.9 points and 2.9 rebounds in 19 minutes per game last season for the Bulldogs, which somehow was good enough to make the All Missouri Valley Freshman team.  Since he's a stretch 4 he better be able to shoot is what you're saying, and he hit 35% of his three-pointers with an average of 3 attempts per game, both of which are pretty good numbers for an unheralded freshman.  If Richard Pitino can implement the system he wants a big man who can hit the three, and King should fit the bill.

Perhaps more importantly, however, given the Gophers current front court questions, is can he rebound?  The 2.9 per game doesn't sound all that impressive, but it was good enough for fourth on the team and came about in just 19 minutes per so that's not so bad.  His offensive and defensive rebounding percentages (5.5% and 13.5%) came in third and fourth on the team, respectively.  That may sound good, but Drake was a horrendous rebounding team.  If King put up those numbers on last year's Gopher team he would have been 9th in offensive rebounding % but fifth in defensive rebounding %.

In any case, getting an eligible Joey King certain helps this team by giving them another viable option in the paint.  Assuming, that is, that King doesn't go all Rick Rickert on it and do nothing but flit about the three-point line all day (a concern considering he took 7 threes in the intrasquad scrimmage vs. 0 two-pointers while grabbing only one rebound).  If he treats the 3-pointer as a weapon instead of a crutch, and works to bolster the team's rebounding which is going to a problem either way, this move could go from good to essential.  If he doesn't, we could be looking at a less-skilled version of Rickert, in which case I'm going to be yelling at him all year.

Fingers crossed.

Game Preview: Gophers vs. Hawkeyes

Not a ton to say about the Nebraska game.  It was nice to see the Gophers cruise to an easy win and nicer to see Rodney Williams look like the good Rodney Williams again, but it was obvious from the opening tip that Nebraska isn't nearly in the same class as the Gophers and, as such, it's tough to take too much away from that game other than the wheels haven't completely come off this season.  Still, breaking a four game losing skid is always a positive, so there's that I suppose.  Really a home game against Nebraska couldn't have come at a better time.  Hopefully they can continue playing well against Iowa on Sunday, because the Hawkeyes are a significantly better team than Nebraska.

They come in to the game at 14-7 and 3-5 in conference play and they do have some pretty good wind and, if it wasn't for an absolutely brutal non-conference strength of schedule (#320) they'd probably actually be looking at the bubble for the NCAA Tournament.  One of those conference wins was over Wisconsin and they swept the other two Iowa schools (Northern and State).  Their problem is they haven't beaten anyone else - at all.  They've lost to every other decent team they've played (with near miss wins at Carver-Hawkeye against both Indiana and Michigan State) and padded that record by beating up on bad teams with a win over Gardner-Webb as their next best win.  The NCAA dream probably died when they lost in OT to Purdue on Sunday, but this is certainly a team the Gophers should beat since they're a much better squad.

One thing that plays in the Gophers' favor is that Iowa likes to run and keep games at a fast pace.  The Hawkeyes play at the 46th fastest pace in the country and although the Gophers aren't necessarily a big-time running team because I think Tubby Smith would yell at everyone if they fast breaked too much, they do tend to have success in transition because of their athletic advantage over most teams.  Not to mention their struggles against Northwestern and Wisconsin, who rank 321st and 355th in tempo, so staying away from those long, slow, boring half-court games is a good idea.  Iowa will shoot early and shoot often, and with them ranking 9th in the conference in shooting (by effective FG%) and the Gophers back to playing solid defense (one can hope) that should lead to plenty of rebounds, which bodes well for Minnesota.

Looking at the awesome site hoop-math.com (thank you JF at From the Barn for showing me this), the Gophers take 16% of their shots following a rebound within the first 10 seconds of the shot clock, meaning a fast break off the miss or on the secondary break.  Their effective field goal percentage is also the highest of all situations that occur at least 5% of the time.  The Gophers are going to need to take advantage of as many transition opportunities as they can because once in the half court Iowa's defense is stingy, particularly on 2-point jump shots where they rank 14th in the country in Opponent's FG%.

Looking at Iowa's players they go nine deep and most of them have some redeemable skill, but Roy Marble and Aaron White are the guys to watch out for.  Actually, I'm not worried about White to be honest.  He's gonna be overwhelmed by Mbakwe and I expect he'll struggle mightily for most of the game since he does most of his scoring deep in the paint.  Marble is the guy to watch, because he is truly talented and can score from anywhere on the floor.  He's an excellent shooter from both 2 and 3, handles the ball well, and because he's 6-6 with guard skills he can usually rise up and get that jumper off over smaller guards.  The Gophers have the luxury of putting Austin Hollins on him, and they damn well better, who should be able to help pester him and make it tougher to get that shot off, but if Joe Coleman ends up on him at any time well let me tell you that is not going to end well for Minnesota no sir.

The rest of the squad is pretty much a mixed bag.  A couple of freshmen (Mike Gesell and Anthony Clemmons) start in the back court with Clemmons the distributor and Gesell the shooter with another freshmen in Adam Woodbury starting at center next to White.  At this point Woodbury is pretty much a good rebounder and good shot blocker but has little to no offense game.  Off the bench they go with Josh Oglesby (the supposed shooter who can't shoot), Melsahn Basabe (who showed so much promise as a freshman but has stagnated the last two seasons), and Eric May and Zach McCabe who have been around forever but I still couldn't tell you who was who.  One of them is taller than the other one.  They also have a guy who rarely plays named Christopher Rickert who may or may not be related to Rick Rickert.  I'm not going to check so let's just say he's his cousin.

Anyway, although Iowa is certainly a step up in class from Nebraska, they still aren't the kind of team the Gophers should have trouble with whether you think they're just not that good, or think they just hit a bump in the road.  I'm leaning towards the latter.

Minnesota 82, Iowa 62.

Tejas

Well, I'm here in Dallas, stuck in a crappy hotel all by myself. You know what that means, drunk blogging. There's no better way to waste time. You know what they got in Texas? Steers and Queers. And I ain't seen no steers.

Since I'm by myself I figured I'd have a nice steak or prime rib dinner to charge the company, but this place is surrounded by nothing but chains. Not even an Outback. So instead of some crap like Chili's or Crapplebee's, I headed over to the local Buffalo Wild Wings because it's always good and they have trivia (which I dominated). Coming down here I almost wore my Baylor hat, which I picked up because they are the sleeper basketball team of 2008-2009 TM, but thought better of it because Texans are crazy. I didn't some good ole boy in a ten gallon hat that says Texas A&M on it gettin' all up in my business. Plus, if stereotypes have taught me anything it's that all Texans carry guns and aren't afraid to use them. And I don't carry my gun anymore to travel, not since that little incident, so it wouldn't have been a fair fight. That's just stress I don't need.

I did enjoy the two dudes right next to me who ordered a big ole basket of boneless wings to share - and then shared the sauce too. Hello queers. Again, I didn't even dare look sideways at them since they probably had guns, too. With pink and/or rainbow grips, but still, they kill equally well and I have no burning desire to die. But it was cute. Anyway, on to the whatever.

- I had so much trouble finding a place to by beer and fill the tub as seen in the picture above. I went to a couple of grocery/convenience stores and nothing, and my handy GPS said there wasn't any place with Liquor, Bottle, Spirits, or Wine all that close. I finally gave up and went to the nearest place with 'Liquor' in the title, and wouldn't you know it, I think I'm in a dry city/county. As soon as I passed signs that said "Welcome to Dallas" (technically I'm staying in Irving) there was a big ass liquor store on the left and a big ass liquor store on the right. Dry counties are the suck.

- Speaking of things, on my way to the airport today there was a truck that was transporting fireworks next to a big old gasoline truck. That could have been explosive. (get it)

- Anyway, on to sports related things, this Delmon Young thing really has me intrigued. I hate to give up on him, particularly because the throw-ins is a big win for Tampa. Harris/Bartlett is pretty much whatever, but the Pridie/Morlan thing is a killer. Pridie is essentially worthless, while Morlan is still a top prospect, and he's awesome in OOTP. I fully expect him to be closing for the Rays one day. With that said, trading Delmon is pretty much giving up and admitting it was a shitty trade. Although, Sidler''s guy JJ Hardy has me really intrigued. I don't want to spoil his upcoming post - allegedly - but I really like that idea.

- By the way, in case you're curious about former Twins in the playoffs:
C - AJ Pierzynski
1b - David Ortiz
SS - Jason Bartlett
3b - Mike Lamb
LF - Terry Tiffee
Cf - Torii Hunter
RF - Casey Blake

SP - Matt Garza
RP - JC Romero
RP - Grant Balfour

Almost a full team. Just need a second basemen. Give 'em Eckstein and this team's taken the title.

- Funny story. So the other day I came home from work, and from my next door neighbors house I heard people talking in Spanish. I was like, I didn't know they moved. Then, the next day, I heard it again. I looked over, and I noticed that they were having their roof redone. By Mexicans. My neighbors are having their roof redone by Mexicans. I felt guilty and I'm not really even sure why.

- It seems the WNBA gave out their awards today. I'll be sure to blog on that at a later date. Make sure to remind me if I forget.

- So here's what I think about this Justin Cobb signing. I'm sure he's an excellent player and I totally trust Tubby, but I'm still a bit nervous. The fancy pants Daily Gopher interviewed his high school coach, and this is what troubles me: He doesn't attack the basket as much as I would like. His coach said that. Now, that was sandwiched in between a whole bunch of complimentary quotes, but it's still there. I'm under the impression that coaches will pretty much do nothing but talk up there players. Like, if you asked Rick Rickert's high school coach about him, he would say, "Good judgement. Tough guy. Awesome tough inside defender. Definitely will never float around the perimeter and forget about the paint. Hates the NBA. Hates Australia." So I'm a little bit nervous about that quote. But mostly I just wanted to make that Rickert joke, so shut up.

- On another Tubby note, he paid a nice little in home visit recently to 6-8 New Hampshire Center Andrew Fitzgerald, a four star player and Scout's #14th ranked center, who also ranks #100 overall on the Rivals 150. Adding a player like that to the already loaded 2009 class takes the Gophers into top 10 territory. Now, before you get all erect, Fitzy has a lot of heat on him, and plans to take a visit to Louisville later this month, so the odds on Tubby landing him after jumping into the fray so late aren't super terrific (the opposite of the odds that my server at BW's wanted on me - I mean, she called me sweetheart for pete's sake), but if Tubby can get him it would be a major get. A little inside info: He attended Brewster Academy in New Hampshire. The Gopher football coach is Tim Brewster. It's pretty much a lock.

- You know who was a really underrated all-time video game superstar who never gets any play; Yves Racine. Go go Speed Racine.

- On TV at the place tonight, since there's no actual sports tonight, was a replay of the Vikings game (nice special teams, geniuses) and an NBA preseason game between the Celtics and someone. You know who is going to take the NBA by storm? Bill Walker. Just dominant. He ended up scoring almost a point per minute tonight, which, by my calculations, means if the Celtics play him an entire game he'll average nearly 48 points per game next season. Take that Wilt. All he has to do is beat out Darius Miles for the spot. And, as much as I love Darius and his award winning performance as "Basketball Player #2" in Van Wilder, I really think he can handle it. I just came up with an awesome nickname for him. Sky. Bill "Sky" Walker. God that's hot.

- So some weirdo wanted more pictures of Wonderbaby. Fine. Here you go:
Please don't be a perv, guy.

- So I checked out the Brewers prospects, and they do have a couple of SS's in the top ten. Nobody way awesome though, so it might be a little tougher to pry Hardy away than I thought. Again, I want him to blog on this more than I, so that's all I'll say. I would love to have JJ Hardy over here.

- As much as I hate to admit this, I watched the Sex in the City movie recently, and let me tell you it is even worse than you could have imagined. Imagine the most high maintenance girl you know. Now imagine her PMSing hard. Now imagine being locked in a car with her for two and a half hours when she's had a bad day at work and "just wants to vent." It's like that but worse. Way worse. The movie has everything that should never be in a movie. It's a sad movie about sad women being sad, and sad women love watching it because it makes them feel better about their own sad situations and has a happy ending so they think there's hope for their sad selves. I don't even want to get into the fact that Mrs. W loved it.

- And you know what else? That show was actually pretty good for the first few years. It was funny situations acted out by fairly decent characters and wasn't too bad and their were some boobs sometimes. Then, in the last few seasons, the characters mostly just became caricatures of themselves and they were forcing characters into situations rather than having funny situations to begin with. I had a lot more to say here but now I realize what exactly it is I'm writing about so I'm going to just stop.

- Also, I've seen every episode. Shut up.

- What's way better than that is a little movie called Saved. I can't recommend it highly enough. It pokes fun at religion in a very fun way that is not offensive for the weirdies out there. It stars an awesome Rockin' Talkin' Macauly Caulkin, along with Mandy Moore, the underrated Patrick Fugit and Heather Matarazzo (lesbian), and the super hot and underrated Jena Malone. I'm sure there are plenty of you who won't find Jena Malone attractive, but for those who are intelligent here you go:If you don't see it, I can't help you.

- I'm currently reading Case Closed by Gerald Posner, a big ole exposition about the JFK assassination. I can't recommend it enough. How much do I know about the JFK thing? That he was killed in Dallas by Lee Harvey Oswald, and there are questions about what exactly happened, right. I was there too, but this goes into so much more. It's really quite illuminating.

- Dodgers, Rays.

- I was watching some Cowboys/Bengals replay at the bar tonight, and I decided for the sake of the Cowboys (and my fantasy teams) that Tony Romo should just throw to TO and Witten every play.

- The 2008 NBDL draft will be on November 7th, and will be televised on NBA TV at 7pm EST. Sweet. I might need to watch this. Last year's draft featured first pick Eddie Gill, and have zero idea who that is. Other first round luminaries included Jelani McCoy and Darvin Ham, leading me to believe the NBDL is not working out as hoped, since these guys are like thirty. Other first rounders of note would be Kevin Kruger and Kevin Pittsnogle, which clearly means the NBDL draft is the biggest joke ever. Later round picks of note include nobody. I can't wait for this year's draft, when Lawrence McKenzie, Tom Coverdale, and Shawn Respert are picked.

- Seriously though, I would watch this. I'm actually kind of excited.

- I got nothing. Here's some pictures I saved and have no idea when I'd ever use so take a gander:

Terps kill Gophs; Rickert smells nice

Oof. I generally enjoy the NIT (sadly, I'm used to going to these games), and when a high quality program like Maryland comes to town, I usually look forward to it, no matter how sick I am of that particular year's Gopher squad. I met up with The Old Man, Snacks, and The Todd last night for the game, and this was going to be The Todd's first ever Gopher basketball experience. After throwing back a couple at the Knight Cap (and winning in the meat raffle) we headed off to the game, The Todd a bundle of excitement, thrilled to attend a game and to see his twin and hero Spencer Tollackson in person. Hopefully, the game would be a good experience.

Boy, was that ever wrong. Maybe the worst game I've ever attended, and I was here last year. From the beginning it was clear Tubby was going to be using this game to see what he had for the future, which was a good idea, but it quickly became obvious that the future is not so bright that you have to wear shades. It seemed neither Maryland nor the Gophers were particularly excited to be there, and the game quickly deteriorated into the caliber of a pick-up game at the Y - or the Australian league. Sloppy passing, sloppy defense - I can't even count how many times Terrapin players beat the whole Gopher team down the floor - and altogether ugly basketball. Although, since The Todd is a hockey fan, it was probably boring enough to be right up his alley.

To make matters worse, somehow the home crowd was especially homerish and unintelligent, roaring with displeasure at even the most obvious call against the Gophers and misunderstanding some of the simplest rules and concepts - loudly. The worst was the standing ovation after a foul was called on Maryland in the second half, against 8 Gopher fouls. Lopsided, to be sure, however there is no rule that says fouls have to be even, and it was clear that the Terps weren't committing fouls, but the Minnesota fans were damn well convinced the refs had it out for the Gophers, just like every single loss they've had over the years. I think the smartest fans other than ourselves at the game were the pair of ten year olds sitting next to The Todd who said, at least twice, "Whatever you do, don't give the ball to number 50", breaking Todd's heart in the process.

As far as players go.....meh. Damian Johnson played more minutes than the three seniors combined, and looking good. Westbrook attacked the basket and was aggressive, but really played poorly. Shamala was the second most aggressive offensively player for the team, which is seriously frightening. Hoffarber twice drove the lane, and when he couldn't get all the way to the rim, dished it out instead of shooting a floater or pull up jumper, showing that he has two shots in his bag - a three pointer and a lay-up - and making it clear he has a lot of work to do. Busch proved he doesn't belong on a D-I court, except in garbage time.

As bad as the game was, we still had a great time, which I will show you in pictures. Such as this picture of the view we had at the Knight Cap:



Yes, that's a dude. Hot.

Once at the game, we noticed there was nobody in most of the suites up high in Williams, so myself, Snacks, and the Todd decided to go see if we could make it up there.

Once I made up, we realized the door behind us would lock so we couldn't get back out that way. I was once again sent up to make sure there was an actual way out. Here is Snacks waiting for me, and probably doubting both my brilliance and ninja skills.



After eluding one usher, I had to jedi-mind trick another. He was all, "Can I see your ticket" and I was "You don't need to see my ticket" with a hand wave, and he was all, "I don't need to see your ticket. Move along." So we made it. If you're curious, here is the view from the suites:



And here is Snacks and I enjoying the suite, thank you Boston Scientific:



As nice as it was, they weren't stocked with booze at all - we checked - or food, and the start of the second half was brutally awful, so we made our way back down. Who should we run into in the hallway, but the one, the only, the man, the legend, Rick Rickert - who is very tall. As we walked passed, I slapped hands with him and said "What up Rick!" thinking it would be a very good bit for DWG, and chuckling a bit inside. But then The Todd did me one better, and completely one-upped me and the rest of the world. He asked for a picture, which Rick was gracious enough to grant him. As I took the picture, I looked back to see Snacks as far away as possible, trying not to laugh. Here it is, the greatest moment in Down with Goldy history, captured for all the world to see:



It's a bit blurry, as the Todd's camera phone, your typical 16-year old girl's phone, had some issues with this one, but it's here. [EDIT = much better picture now] And no, that's not a short Spencer Tollackson with Rickert, it's actually Todd.

The Todd's reaction after the picture, "Rickert smells nice."

Still Going

Dammit that sucked, but I still have a bunch of beer, and thanks to my sports package I can still watch UCLA/Oregon State and St. Mary's/San Francisco, the last two chances I have to try to salvage an absolutely horrible gambling day. I'll keep drinking and posting and try to not kill myself.

- I guess it's a testament to how far the program has come, in that I care so much and actually believe in this team. It was clearly a huge mistake. They play tough defense, and they hustle on both ends, but they just don't have the players (thanks Monson). Even Nolen and Hoffbauer looked like freshman tonight. Give a lot of credit to Ohio State's defense, they basically stifled the Gophers the whole way.

- I always considered Jamar Butler a shooting guard, and even though he went off tonight for 27 points and 9 assists, he also turned it over five times. I maintain he's still a shooting guard forced to play point, Gopher shredding aside.

- Looks like Tubby has given up on Shamala and Payton, and I think that's the right call. I think Shamala can contribute against certain teams where his lack of athleticism isn't a liability, but I'm not sure where you can play Payton. At first, I was thinking that some of the combinations Tubby had out there tonight were horrible coaching decisions, but after thinking about, there aren't that many good players on this team at all, so you're going to end up with bad combinations no matter what. However, I still think having Nolen and Hoffbauer in the backcourt together against a defense like Ohio State's for ten minutes is a mistake.

- UCLA/Oregon State isn't on yet because Oregon and USC are in overtime. I'm guessing this is much more better. Except it wasn't because USC blew them out in overtime and won by 9.

- In case you're wondering about that YMCA league that Dusty Rychart is playing in in Australia, here are the other people who play in that league who are interesting: Derrick Alston (also known as "The guy from Duquesne on NBA Live 95"), Larry Abney (Fresno St), Mike Chappell (Michigan St), Ebi Ere (Oklahoma), Orien Greene (Flordia/UL-Laff), Rod Grizzard (Oklahoma), Shane Heal (giggle), Julius Hodge (NC State - and he got shot), Nick Horvath (Duke), Alex Loughton (ODU), Kirk Penney (Wisconsin), Rick Rickert (Rickert and Rychart reunited), Joe Shipp (Cal), Wayne Turner (Kentucky).

- Ebi Ere and Kirk Penney are the top scorers in the league (Rickert = 16th), Rickert is also second in rebounding, while Rychart is ninth in rebounding and first in offensive boards. Told you in was a YMCA league. Also, Orien Greene leads in turnovers and is second in fouls. He should probably be an accountant or something.

- San Fran is down 25 and Oregon State is hanging with UCLA. It seriously looks like I'm about to go 2-8-1 tonight. Not good times.

- Ferris Bueller's Day off was a great movie. I wonder how many poor kids got named Ferris after that.

- It seems the name Ferris has never ranked in the top 1000 boys names, ever. So I guess not that many. Rico was 664th most popular in the 80s before dropping out of the top 1000. I expect that number to rise soon.

- You know what puts a whole weird spin on Ferris Bueller's Day Off? The fact that the principle takes off his whole day to try to track him down, including breaking in to his home, and then that actor turned out to be a chomo. Weird.

- Back to basketball. These are the people who play in France with Mike Bauer: Chevy Troutman (Pitt), Alan Wiggins (San Fran), Justin Doellman (Xavier), Tony Skinn (GMU), LaVell Blanchard (Michigan), Terrell Everett (Oklahoma), Vince Grier (I didn't know he landed in France), Marcus Slaughter (SDSU), Marcus Sommerville (Bradley), Sam Clancy (USC), Zabian Dowdell (VA Tech), Brandon Heath (SDSU), Theron Smith (Ball State - was going to be an NBA star until hurting his knee two straight years), Taj Gray (Okla), Je'Kel Foster (Ohio St), Terence Dials (Ohio St), Antonio Graves (Pitt).

- And the French league is broken up into three divisions, and Bauer starts for a team in the upper division, so he's doing fairly well. I'd also like to let you know that the team he plays for is called Nancy. Insert your own joke here.

- I'd love to tell you how Grier is doing, but again, it's a pay site and I'm not paying just to get his stats. I can tell you he's starting for an "A" League team.

- Oh, that picture up there is some cheerleader at a Russian basketball game. I searched for "European Basketball Cheerleader" and she came up.

- I still think it's weird that Lorenzo Mata changed his last name to Mata-Real. I wonder if his mom just bitched at him constantly or something to add it.

- 29 points with 14 minutes left for Darren Collison on only 10 shot attempts. That ain't bad.

- I think Darren Collison might actually be Earl Watson, come back for four more years. Seriously.

- Oh, I forgot to mention that Mike Chappell holds the all-time record for points in a game in Dusty (and Rick's) Australian league with 44.

- He Got Game was a pretty damn good movie.

- Have a shot at 3-7 rather than 2-8. That would be good. Don't F me UCLA.

- Sweet, UCLA covered to put me at 3-7. What a horrid streak. I'm going to watch Varstiy Blues and pass out.

- I just want to add, I love everything about this movie except the ending. PUKE n RALLY!

What up with the NBDL?

So I'm drunk in Lincoln, NE - again - and I'm bored. I have three Newcastles in the bathroom sink - with ice - and figured, "why not figure out what's up with the whole NBDL thing?" Now, I dont have the energy or soberness to figure out the rules and what not with the minor league thing, so instead, I'll just find some players who are in the league. Couple quick points:

1. These people are all better than Rick Rickert, who plays in the Australian YMCA league.

2. This Craig Monroe trade pisses me off. It's like, they're doing something just to do something and saying, "Hey, look at us. We're doing something." Well screw that. Craig Monroe is a chomo.

3. It's nice to be able to find Seinfeld on TV at pretty much any moment.

4. This is why having a bottle opener on your key chain makes you smart and prepared, not immature.

5. If I'm asleep by 3, I can still get 6 hours of sleep. Sweet.

6. I'm going to be a father. This scares me, and should probably scare all of you.

7. I found out I officially have a reputation in my company as a "Big Drinker." I can't decide if this is awesome, or kind of a bad thing. Since I'm drunk right now, I"m going to go with "Awesome."

On to the fake basketball league:

Albuquerque Thunderbirds: Serge Angounou (Ariz St), Kris Collins (New Mex), Darvin Ham (Tex Tech), Daniel Horton (Mich). Obviously the big news here is Kris Collins. I don't actually remember all the crap behind him, but I know he was a Gopher at one point or another, and it clearly didn't work out. I think he was too dumb or something. Darvin Ham once broke a backboard (might have been twice), and Horton was supposed to be a pretty good player at Michigan. He seemed to be pretty solid oh my god Eliza Dushku is on that seventies show and how did I not know that? That chick is so way hot.

Anaheim Arsenal: Guillermo Diaz (Miami), Anthony Harris (Miami), Steven Smith (LaSalle), Marquis Webb (Rutgers). Diaz and Harris were a pretty dynamic show at Miami. I have to think having two guards who were pretty good in college and are still together can only help. Not help getting them to the NBA, because clearly they kind of suck since they are in this league, but still. Smith was the best player at LaSalle since Lionel Simmons, and dominated the A-10 - which obviously means nothing. Webb was basically known just since Quincy Douby was so good.

Austin Toros: Justin Bowen (UIC), Ashanti Cook (G-Town), Kevin Pittsnogle (WVU). Bad team. I only included Bowen here because he went to UIC, and my buddy JC and I saw him play in an exhibition several years ago where they had a VIP booth we couldnt' get into, despite his friend who was supposedly a high roller there. Cook was terrible, and obviously Pittsnogle is a joke. When you're tall, for the love of god please try to play in the post once in a while, there are enough short people who can only shoot outside. Weird, kind of like JC in intramurals. Tall, yet too afraid to play downlow and only roam about the three point line. Rickert-like. They also have a guy from Tarleton State, new home of Limar Wilson. So there's hope for him yet.

Bakersfield Jam: Brandon Bowman (GTown). This team is boring because I'm hardly heard on any of their guys - I'm gong to assume they suck. Plus, the Jam? Really? Did you have a contest to name your team and only invite retarded fifth graders to submit nicknames? Brutal. I also actually like Bowman quite a bit, and still think he could be a good player. He's by far the best player out of this group of clowns so far.

Colorado 14ers: Julian Sensley (Hawaii), Kelly Whitney (Seton Hall). Bad. Also bad name. This is Rickert's former team, but I guess he couldn't crack this tough roster of guys who I've never heard of other than two I think I maybe kind of know who they are. I think Sensley was a guy who put up good numbers for Hawaii every year, and always kind of thought about going pro but never did. Probably shouldn't have. Not entirely sure who Whitney was, but I think he played with Holloway, and that guy was the fucking man.

Dakota Wizards: Blake Ahearn (Mizz St), Will Frisby (Miami), Armein Kirkland (Cincy), David Palmer (South Utah). Ahearn, if I remember correctly, was one of the best free throw shooters in collegiate history. Frisby had a sweet name. I saw a game once where Kirkland was awesome, but I think it was one of his only good games - ever. David Palmer was a hell of a kick returner for the Vikings - also one of 2P's favorite players ever.

Fort Wayne Mad Ants: Shagari Alleyne (Kentucky), Justin Cage (Xavier), Earl Calloway (Indiana), Roderick Wilmont (Indiana), Sammy Mejia (DePaul), Lukasz Obrzut (Kentucky). Tubby Smith's two biggest mistakes ever might be on this team, in Alleyne and Obrzut. Very tall, and very retarded, these two never really amounted to much - yet they would have been awesome at the U of MN, so keep that in mind. Two other teammates here in the Indiana guards, both pretty solid players. Mejia is the kind of player who might still make the NBA at some point. Also that nickname is so stupid it's awesome.

Idaho Stampede: Randy Livingston (LSU), Brent Petway (Michigan). Petway was crazy athletic, and is still young enough to possibly develop into a decent player. Livingston I swear has been around since the Chris Jackson era. I think he hurt his knee 17 times, and is still hanging around the fringes of the NBA, so good for him.

Iowa Energy: Jeff Horner (Iowa). Yep, Jeff Horner's all they got. That guy was always a little weiner. Like Wojo from Duke with less gay and more offense.

L.A. D-Fenders: Sean Banks (Memphis), Errick Craven (USC), Jelani McCoy (UCLA). It's cute how they don't spell out D-Fenders. Very LA of them. Banks can score, and Errick Craven is only memorable because he had a twin named Derrick, and also because I used to have a friend named Eric Cravens. I wonder what happened to him? His family was rich, and had satellite TV when it wasn't normal with the big dish and everything, and had the playboy channel when I was in eighth grade. Awesome. Anyway, McCoy was one of the best shot blockers I've ever seen. I know the Sonics gave him a chance. It's too bad he had zero offensive game, because defensively he's an absolute force. That dude should have a highlight film on youtube, but alas, it's not to be.

Rio Grande Valley Vipers: Steve Novak (Marquette), Kevin Bookout (Oklahoma), CJ Watson (Tennessee). Novak will end up in the NBA at some point. He's way too good a shooter to not. Bookout and Watson are two fo teh most overrated college players ever. Bookout was supposed to be a big deal recruit, but he's really just an average, bigger, white guy. Like Kris Humprhries but way less talented. Watson was a chucker. Like Scottie Reynolds now. Hey Scottie, Look! It's your future!

Sioux Falls Skyforce: Marcus Bailey (Wyoming), Nik Caner-Medley (Maryland), Ben Jacobson (North Iowa). Well, just the fact that Caner-Medley is playing professional basketball is a testament to human will. Jacobson seems like that type of player who will always find work playing somehwere. Not sure why I highlighted Bailey. I think I"m thinking of Mario Bailey, former U of Washington wide receiver and Bill Walsh College Football (Sega) All-Star.

Tulsa 66ers: Dwight Brewington (Liberty), Ramon Sessions (Nevada). I remember Brewington from Providence. Seemed like a pretty good player. Guess he transferred to Liberty though. Totally memorable. Sessions I can't say crap about, because I don't live on the West coast and dont' think I ever saw him play. I honestly couldn't pick Nick Fazekas out of a lineup. I could pick out Eric Chenowith though, because I once stayed in the same hotel as him and got his autograph. Not because I wanted it, but because Snacks and I were drunk and laughing about him, and my mom went up and got his autograph for both of us as a joke. True story.

Utah Flash: Andre Ingram (St. johns), Jeff Hagen (Minn), Kevin Kruger (UNLV). Kruger is like Jacobson, just the kind of player who will never have to get a real job because he'll just keep hooking on with low level basketball teams. Big story here is Jeff Hagen, obviously. As much as I would love to have more info on him, there is no link to him on their site. I'd try to look it up but it's 1:33am and that's just about enoough.

Hey Sidler, way to have Dwight Freeney get hurt. Nice job.

Ricky Rick's Blog

Rick Rickert's blog, as posted at the Gopher Hole, and I'm not even kidding.

I didn't spend a whole lot of time there, but it seems this New Zealand league he's in must be as easy as Dusty's Australian League, since Rick had a 39 point, 19 rebound game his first time out in that league. It's actually pretty boring. No comments on making one of the worst draft-related decisions in the history of the league.

Baseball playoffs - expect the Rockies in 5, Indians in 7.

Game 1 of Indians/Red Sox is heavily tilted in the Sox favor at the books. Indians are +142, with Sabathia on the hill. I don't care who is on the other side, Sabathia should never have that poor of odds. He pitched against the Sox only once this year, but held them to 1 run on 5 hits in seven innings, striking out 7. Sure, Beckett pitched well against the Indians, giving up 0 runs in 8 and 2 runs in 7 in his two starts against them, but it's not a +142 matchup, not at all. It's a good bet on the Indians.

Everyone is Stupid

For the seven hundreth year in a row, a large amount of underclassmen are declaring for the NBA draft, with little to no chance of being picked in the first round, and a good chance of not getting drafted. Granted, some of these guys won't sign with an agent and will have the option to pull out and return to school, but what's the point if you aren't even going to get first round consideration? Here's a list of idiots, with projections courtesy of NBADraft.net:

Unlikely to be Drafted:
Dwight Brewington, Liberty
Aaron Bruce, Baylor
Jaycee Carroll, Utah St
Marcel Jones, Oregon St
James Mays, Clemson
Shaun Pruitt, Illinois
Maurice Rice, George Washington
Reggie Williams, VMI
JamesOn Curry, Ok State (hasn't announced, but is rumored to be going)

Late Second to Undrafted:
Roy Bright, Delaware St
Wilson Chandler, DePaul
Glen Davis, LSU
Joseph Jones, Texas A & M
Marcelus Kemp, Nevada
Charles Rhodes, Miss State
Ramon Sessions, Nevada
Sean Singletary, Virginia
Joey Dorsey, Memphis
Dominic James, Marquette

These people are all the same as Rick Rickert. Good luck in Europe guys.

I was Wrong About Rick Rickert

When Rick Rickert decided to go pro after his sophomore year with the Gophers - averaging 16 pts and 6 rebs, I thought he was making a huge mistake. When he didn't get drafted until almost the end of the second and final round of the draft, and it was by the Wolves who felt sorry for him, I laughed. When he got cut, I laughed. When Garnett punched him in the face, I laughed even harder. And when he got stuck playing in the D-League, I laughed.

But I was wrong. Oh, so wrong.

My friends, the great Rick Rickert has a chance to be a champion. His Colorado 14ers will be playing the Dakota Wizards this Sunday for the D-League championship.

Rickert got everything he wanted. After averaging eleven points and six rebounds per game in the NBDL, he's managed to carry his team to the championship, averaging 8 pts and 8 rebs per game in the playoffs. And now, on Sunday, he'll be playing for every little boy's dream: an NBDL championship.

I apologize Rick Rickert. I was wrong. You win.