I really have no idea why I stopped doing these posts. They're fairly easy, since I can write parts of them during the week, they cover all sports for an entire week period, and they give you, the idiot reader, something to depend on knowing this post will be here every Monday morning. I'm going to do my best to get back on this and start having the Monday morning Week in Review's again. Or your money back. And I'm going to start with Lance Armstrong.
Ha ha just kidding. I don't care.
WHO WAS AWESOME
1. Joe Flacco. As much as I hate to give credit when it's due, I'm going to have to in Flacco's case because he had a great game getting the Ravens to the Super Bowl and outplayed Tom Brady to do it. He seems to have developed a couple interesting skills to go with one of the strongest arms in the league - he can pick apart a defense underneath using his backs and TEs, and he has that over the shoulder throw to Boldin in the end zone down cold. Both of his touchdown throws to Boldin were on that same play, and more than half his completions were to backs or tight ends, and then he can cut loose with that big arm to Torrey Smith when needed. It will be kind of interesting to see how he adjusts in the red zone when the 49ers inevitably put a safety on top of Boldin when they get close. I also just realized this is going to be a Harbaugh vs. Harbaugh Super Bowl and we're going to have to hear that over and over and over again. Oh god, and also Ray Lewis. And I have a feeling Colin Kaepernick is going to get way too much press, too. God I am suddenly remembering how much I hate the 2 weeks leading up to the Super Bowl. Don't they have some kind of 2-week coma drug? I know the wife and kids probably wouldn't be down for me going in that direction, but I'm not sure I have a choice. Not my fault.
2. Washington Nationals. In a baseball hot stove league that's been characterized by teams "going for it in their window" more than any other I can remember (Baltimore Orioles exempted, for some reason) the Nats just made another move that put them in the Dodgers/Blue Jays tier for "going for it" signing closer Rafael Soriano to a two year, $28 million deal with an option that automatically vests if he finishes 120 combined games in the two years. That now gives the Nationals a bullpen of Tyler Clippard in the 7th, Drew Storen in the 8th, and Soriano in the 9th, and that's in front of a rotation of Stephen Strasburg/Gio Gonzalez/Jordan Zimmermann/Dan Haren/Ross Detwiler. Their also loaded with a young and talented lineup with only one bad contract (Jayson Werth), Wilson Ramos will be back at catcher, they traded for Denard Span to fill their only real lineup leak, and resigned Adam LaRoche to a reasonable contract which gives them an excellent trade chip (Michael Morse, now a back-up who was just traded to Seattle in a three-way deal that brought them a couple decent prospects because lord knows they don't have enough) all at the same time. Yes, paying $14 million to a reliever is too much especially when you have to give up a first round pick to do it, but I'm a big fan of this "going for it" thing and I'd say they're in pretty decent shape. At least until they shutdown Strasburg after 190 innings this year because, you know, you can never be too careful.
3. Butler Bulldogs. I don't know if it's Brad Stevens or what (NOTE: it's probably Brad Stevens) but Butler just keeps on going. When they made those back-to-back NCAA Championship games you kind of figured like, ok he found a few diamonds in the rough in Gordon Hayward, Shelvin Mack, and Matt Howard (really rough, in his case) and Stevens got them to perfectly come together for a magical run (or two) and then they'd go back to being Butler. When they missed the NCAA Tournament (made the CBI) last season everything looked confirmed. But now? First Stevens gets Rotnei Clarke, and ultra-experienced deadeye shooter who fits Butler's system perfectly, to come to Indy, joining a couple of decent players, and you figure Butler would probably be decent. Little did you know Clarke was going to play out of his mind and a couple promising youngsters would suddenly blossom into double-digit scorers. Then Clarke gets hurt against Richmond and you'd think Butler would slide, but they had no issue finishing up Richmond, and then played a really, really good Gonzaga team and did this:
I hate teams that are always good because I'm so unfamiliar with it. It's like an Amish who was dropped in Dubai.
4. Florida Gators. For my money, there are six teams (seven if you count my super sleeper VCU) who could potentially win the NCAA Championship this year - Louisville, Syracuse, Michigan, Indiana, Duke, and the sixth is Florida. For some reason they're only ranked 10th. Why? Because they have two losses, although those happen to be at Arizona (a one-loss team) in a game Florida controlled for 38 minutes before letting it slip away, and against a good Kansas State in Kansas City. Look at their recent results. After a week of dominating fools they've now won their four SEC games by 33 (vs. Georgia), 22 (@ LSU), 21 (@ Texas A&M), and 31 (vs. Missouri). I know Mizzou is in kind of a tailspin right now with Bowers hurt and Dixon having been kicked off the team, but beating that team by 31 is still damn impressive. Florida is one of the few teams in the country with a great offense and a great defense, with great players both on the perimeter and in the paint. I feel pretty effing good having gotten down on them at 12-1 to win the whole thing. Don't think, just do it.
5. Syracuse Orangemen. I've touted Louisville as my #1 team in the country so I need to give credit to the Orange for taking them down on the road, and actually this was the game that convinced me to put Cuse in that "could win the title" group because they played great in a tough environment. I have no idea why Syracuse has kind of been under my radar, but I assume it's because I'm an idiot. They're loaded at guard and play two point guards in Brandon Triche and Michael Carter-Williams, which they can get away with because they're 6-4 and 6-6, and an awesome front court that includes two great scorers (C.J. Fair and James Southerland) and a defensive superstar (Rakeem Christmas). Their only loss was to Temple at MSG, and they now have probably the best win of anyone this season with that roadie vs. the #1 team to legitimize them. They do have a big issue hanging over them with Southerland's indefinite suspension due to some kind of academic issue, but I would assume he'll be back soon enough given that Syracuse is a big time hoops school and so the administrators probably understand it's best to get him back on the court.
Stupid Joel Maturi.
WHO SUCKED
1. Gopher basketball. I'm not giving up on the season, thinking they suck, or anything like that. I mean they have three losses this season and they're all to teams that have been ranked in the top 3 this season, and only the Duke game was a double digit loss. What sucks, and why I have to put the Gophers here, is that I'm having trouble imagining them as a Final Four team anymore, simply because there have been stretches in all three losses where they've been absolutely dominated, and the domination wasn't for a short period of time but a very long one. Michigan outscored them 20-7 over a 7 minute period, Indiana had that entire first half, and Duke pretty much controlled the whole game. For much of this year I had considered the Gophers to be a possible Final Four contending team and maybe the best Gopher team of my life. That seems laughable now, as I'm fairly certain the '97 team would crush these guys.
That's not to say this can't be a very good year. I'm picturing the team now as a top 5 finisher in the Big 10 with like a 5 seed and a decent shot to make the Sweet 16. Wouldn't we all have taken that coming into the season? Of course we would have. By any measure (for the Gopher program) that's a successful season, it's just that it felt like the bar had been raised and that this might be a special team, rather than a very good one. It's hard to feel that way anymore after watching Michigan completely outclass them on their own court. Hopefully they can sweet these next four winnable games and I can feel a bit better, and even though I know this is a really good Gopher team it's hard not to feel a bit of a gut punch here. It's not the losses, it's the way they lost. Hopefully they learn and move on. I'm also now extremely terrified of going to Northwestern.
2. Los Angeles Lakers. I know I'm not exactly breaking new ground here because I think everyone is aware of the Lakers' struggles, but holy crap you guys. Anybody who ever watched sports new their might be an adjustment period bringing in Nash to play with a guy who dominates the ball like Kobe (similar to the LeBron/Wade pairing initially) but even if it took them a while to get it figured out with complimentary players like Dwight Howard and Pau Gasol you'd expect them, worst case, to end up being a very dangerous low seed in the playoffs as they finally figured it out. One problem - they're not figuring it out, and at 17-23 are in severe danger of missing the playoffs after losing to Toronto on Sunday (TORONTO!!) thanks in part to Howard getting booted for picking up two technicals. They've now lost eight of their last ten, and count losses to the Raptors, Cavs, Magic, and the Kings among their failures this year - those are some bad teams. Normally I would be enjoying this immensely, but I just acquired Kobe for my Fantasy NBA team and so now I don't hate him as much.
3. Jordan Hulls. So let me get this straight, the Underpants Gnome plays out of his mind against the Gophers but then plays like a total asshole against Wisconsin? And don't you dare credit Wisconsin for this either, because he was just total garbage who couldn't shoot, only bothered to take 1 three-pointer (seriously with that range he only attempted one? First time all year), and turned the ball over like he was giving it away for Valentine's Day to some handsome man. Plus he was outplayed by Ben Brust who sucks. And what was with Indiana doubling down on Ryan freaking Evans on the block? Just let him go to work, you'll be better off letting him shoot. The only possible explanations for this game was that Indiana felt invincible after beating the Gophers and forgot to try or Jordan Hulls threw the game. Also, why do I have so much trouble spelling invincible? Everything about this has my brain scrambled like Kevin Burleson trying to break a press.
4. Matt Ryan. I thought Ryan was getting a little too much heat for never having won a playoff game (probably because the Matty Ice nickname is so annoying) but it's hard to find a way to not blame that game on Ryan (with a major assist to the defense). I'll even forgive him the pick because Roddy White fell down, but there were plenty of unforgivable mistakes. The fumbled shot gun snap that San Fran recovered which hit him perfectly in the hands and not picking up a single first down after recovering the Crabtree fumble (giving the Niners great field position after a shitty punt) were both pretty awful, but Ryan saved his worst for the biggest play of the game. On that fourth down inside the 10 he forced the ball to a non-open White, never bothering to look at any other receive and thus missing an absolutely wide open Tony Gonzalez who had slipped behind the linebackers and there wasn't a safety over the top - easy TD. I should feel good about this loss because the Falcons screwed over the Vikings in '98, but I hate Jim Harbaugh, Ray Lewis, and the Patriots so Atlanta was my only chance to enjoy the Super Bowl. Hopefully they'll be good food.
5. Seattle Mariners. If I'm going to praise the Nationals for making a good move, I gotta point out that the Mariners apparently are assembling a softball team or something. After acquiring Michael Morse in the above mentioned trade, they now have all these guys: Morse, Raul Ibanez, Jason Bay, Kendrys Morales, Justin Smoak, and Jesus Montero. Which means that even if they plan to give Montero another shot to be a catcher (LOL) they've still got five mostly immobile types to try to shoehorn into a lineup. That means something like Montero at C, Ibanez in LF, Morse in RF, Morales at 1b, and either Smoak or Bay at DH with the other coming off the bench? Ibanez and Morse as two of your 3 outfielders? Franklin Gutierrez is very good, but he's not that good. I guess the real point is why even trade for Morse? Even if they've given up on Smoak (and if they have they should trade him to the Twins because I STILL BELIEVE DAMMIT) acquiring Morse brings nothing to you that you don't already have, and by trading John Jaso to do it you've severely downgraded your defense going to Montero, but they don't really have another choice because, again, they have way to many slow RF/DH/1b types to fit Montero's bat in any other way. Seattle has the potential for a pretty kick-ass future (seriously their minor league pitchers are top shelf) but if they keep fucking up the present like this it's not going to matter. Those Nintendo guys haven't done anything baseball-related right since Baseball Stars. Remember Baseball Stars 2? What were they thinking?
You'll notice I had the prudence to not write about this whole Manti Te'o thing because let's be honest, it's pretty played out at this point. Was a pretty good day on twitter, though. I also didn't write about hockey because it's a sport for cretins. See you soon with a preview of the Northwestern game. Or maybe just a link to the one I wrote like a week ago. Jesus aren't they supposed to space these games out?
Showing posts with label Baltimore Ravens. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Baltimore Ravens. Show all posts
Sunday, January 20, 2013
Tuesday, September 4, 2012
My 10 Predictions for the NFL season
1. Dez Bryant is going to be a monster. Seriously. Physically he's one of the most gifted wideouts in the league. Everybody knows most WRs breakout in their third season, and his first two years (45/561/6 and 63/928/9) point two a guy who is figuring it out (on the field, at least). Dude may be a mess at times, but assuming he doesn't do something stupid like bringing a pound of weed through airport security or beating up a fan for making mom jokes and getting suspended he's going to be huge. I'm talking 90/1,400/12 this year. Of course, Tony Romo completely sucks donkey balls so it's possible he's too scared to throw it down field and just dinks it to Miles Austin and those TEs all the time, in which case I'd put the odds at 50/50 of Bryant blowing up Romo's car.
2. Ryan Williams will be one of the better backs in the league. He has to beat out Beanie Wells first, but let's be honest here that's not really going to be a problem. Williams was an absolute monster for Virginia Tech for two years, breaking the Va Tech single season rushing record and the ACC single season TD record, before the Cardinals took him early in the second round of the 2011 draft. He then destroyed his knee on his first carry in his first preseason game, which is why Arizona fans and football fans in general were subjected to another year watching fatass Wells fall down again and again. Williams is a threat to score every time he has the ball. Wells is a threat to become the next Lendale White. Of course, Williams also missed all of last year and the second half of his final college season due to injury so he's got a bit of china doll syndrome possibly going on so maybe everyone will get lucky and get to watch Wells again. Joy!
3. The Falcons are going to miss the playoffs. Way way way way way too much hype here, and whenever that happens the results are generally in the exact opposite direction. Matt Ryan is going to throw for 2 billion yards with Julio Jones and Roddy White both somehow catching for 1.5 billion apiece! Jacquizz Rodgers is the next NFL super star! Michael Turner will be rejuvenated by this holy crap passing offense! Please. Worst nicknamed player ever Matty Ice hasn't won anything, Michael Turner is going to Shaun Alexander this year, and Rodgers isn't the kind of runner who can be a feature back. Atlanta won't be able to run this year, which means Ryan is going to have to throw a ton and even if his (and those wideouts who I confess are pretty damn good) stats look great he's also going to throw 40 interceptions. Plus their defense sucks. Everyone is going to feel stupid at the end of the year when they suck except me because I'm right, and then you're going to acknowledge me as your god.
4. Percy Harvin is going to have a break out season. No, he's not going be like Dez Bryant or anything, but Harvin should finally break the 1,000 receiving yards barrier and probably hit 100 catches. You can see it coming if you're a Vikes fan who's been watching him for three years, but just to put some quantitativeness to the qualitativeness - from week 7 forward last year (which is when Christian Ponder) took over, Harvin touched the ball 100 times which was the most in the NFL. Second place was Wes Welkerbury with 76. Yeah, Ponder digs him some Percy. He does get more touches than most WR due to the lining up in the backfield he does, particularly once AP went down to injury but even prior to that he was averaging more than 3 rush attempts per game. Looking forward to this.
5. Antonio Gates will break TE records. I know everyone is all over Rob Gronkowski and Jimmy Graham as the world's greatest tight ends - and rightly so because they had the two best seasons by a TE ever last year - but don't forget about Antonio Gates, who is primed to have an even better season that either of those two did last year. You know Philip Rivers is going to throw for a whole bunch of yards just as sure as you know he's going to cry at least once this year, but who gets those yards? Vincent Jackson is gone (#2 in catches last year). Mike Tolbert (#3) is as well, and Vincent Brown (who was supposed to ascend to their new #1 WR) is out half the season with an injury. That leaves Malcom Floyd (please) and Gates as your two main targets, and Antonio is finally healthy again after two injury plagued seasons where he still managed to average 57/780/8. Before getting hurt he had the best 1.5 seasons of his career, and everything points to a career year for him - expect him to break 1,400 receiving yards, a new TE record.
6. Andrew Luck will be better than Robert Griffin III this year. Seems like 95% of opinions I've read on these two say Luck will have the better career but RG3 will be better this season. Well I think Luck's better in both cases. Nobody argues he's the more polished QB already, so the other two factors would be if Luck struggles to pick-up the offensive scheme and if RG3 had markedly better weapons surrounding him, but I don't see it in either case. Luck basically called his own plays at Stanford, a team run by a "cerebral" former QB type like Jim Harbaugh (and by cerebral I mean in comparison to blockheads like Brad Childress) so I don't think he's going to majorly struggle with any system he's asked to run. And as far as weapons, both Indy and the Skins are a mess at RB although I'd give the edge to the Colts based on at least having a clear idea of who is going to get the majority of the carries, and I'll take Reggie Wayne/Austin Collie over Santana Moss/Pierre Garcon every time. What am I missing? Clear advantage to Luck. Also garcon means boy.
7. The Chiefs are going to suck. I have no idea why it seems everyone is picking these guys to win the AFC East this year. None at all. They're horrid. The have three good offensive players and two play the same position and were both hurt all or most of last year (fun fact: Jamaal Charles' middle name is Rashaad - that's a lot of a's), and the other one is Dwayne Bowe who is likely to end up shooting himself in the leg or getting suspended after buying weed in Mexico. Matt Cassell might very well be the worst starting QB in the league, and the Chiefs have one of the worst pass defenses in the entire NFL going up against the pass happy Chargers (6th in passing yds last year) and Raiders (11th and should be even better) and a team that just upgraded from Tim Tebow to Peyton Manning. Speaking of which....
8. The Broncos will win their division. Yes, I'm on board the Peyton train. I kind of have to be since I drafted him like 15 years ago in our inaugural keeper league draft and have held him since, but I truly believe he can make a huge difference for Denver. Demaryius Thomas has all the skill to be a lead WR and Eric Decker has both the game and the smarts to become Peyton's #1 target or at least a 1b to Thomas's 1a. That offense should be good enough to put up some points, and that hyper aggressive defense (big on sacks and turnovers, low on actual stops) could turn for the better. I'd feel better if I had heard of anyone on their offensive line and if their running back was someone better than Willis McGahee, but I feel pretty safe putting my blind trust in Peyton Manning and Champ Bailey. Especially if this was 2003.
9. The Saints are going to the Super Bowl. Seems to me like everybody is ignoring the Saints, and I rarely hear them come up when postseason stuff is talked about. In fact I don't think anyone on ESPN picked them to make the Super Bowl, but you best believe they'll be there. They have the best QB on the planet (or #2 after Rodgers) who has a whole mess of weapons to throw too, and while most teams with three running backs have a mess on their hands they have three guys who would all start in many NFL situations. That offense is straight up sick. And you don't think that defense is going to be playing with a major chip on their shoulder? Don't forget if this team doesn't see Alex Smith miraculously morph into Joe Unitas they're probably in the Super Bowl last year (they would've beat the Giants, I promise). Now take that same basic team (oh no, Robert Meachem left!) and add a big ole steamy plate of gritty emotions? They'll be there. Other playoff teams: NY Giants, Packers, 49ers, Lions, Eagles, Broncos, Texans, Pats, Ravens, Steelers, and Chargers. And your champ.....
10. The Ravens will win the Super Bowl. That's right, I'm backing Joe Flacco. I think we've got a perfect storm here. A young QB coming into his own with an offense being revamped to take advantage of his talents and a WR (Torrey Smith) coming into his own right along with him. Maybe the best offensive weapon in the game (Ray Rice) and one of the best defensive players (Haloti Ngata). Veterans who can still play who know this might be their last shot (Ray Lewis, Ed Reed, Matt Birk, Anquan Boldin). And, similar to the Saints, you've got a team here who was very close to making the Super Bowl last year (if Lee Evans catches one more pass they're in) and has done very little tinkering. Terrell Suggs injury is a bit of an unfortunate wrinkle, but so is your face.
HONORABLE MENTION: Others who will be awesome - Eli Manning, Jay Cutler, LeSean McCoy, Chris Johnson, Matt Forte, Steven Jackson, Carson Palmer, Marshawn Lynch, Brandon Marshall, Hakeem Nicks, Marques Colston, Greg Olsen, David Wilson, Mark Ingram, and Brandon Pettigrew. Those will suck - Cam Newton, Mike Vick, Darren McFadden, Arian Foster, Frank Gore, Ahmad Bradshaw, every Lions RB, Jordy Nelson, Victor Cruz, Miles Austin, Steve Johnson, and Vernon Davis.
BOOK IT.
2. Ryan Williams will be one of the better backs in the league. He has to beat out Beanie Wells first, but let's be honest here that's not really going to be a problem. Williams was an absolute monster for Virginia Tech for two years, breaking the Va Tech single season rushing record and the ACC single season TD record, before the Cardinals took him early in the second round of the 2011 draft. He then destroyed his knee on his first carry in his first preseason game, which is why Arizona fans and football fans in general were subjected to another year watching fatass Wells fall down again and again. Williams is a threat to score every time he has the ball. Wells is a threat to become the next Lendale White. Of course, Williams also missed all of last year and the second half of his final college season due to injury so he's got a bit of china doll syndrome possibly going on so maybe everyone will get lucky and get to watch Wells again. Joy!
3. The Falcons are going to miss the playoffs. Way way way way way too much hype here, and whenever that happens the results are generally in the exact opposite direction. Matt Ryan is going to throw for 2 billion yards with Julio Jones and Roddy White both somehow catching for 1.5 billion apiece! Jacquizz Rodgers is the next NFL super star! Michael Turner will be rejuvenated by this holy crap passing offense! Please. Worst nicknamed player ever Matty Ice hasn't won anything, Michael Turner is going to Shaun Alexander this year, and Rodgers isn't the kind of runner who can be a feature back. Atlanta won't be able to run this year, which means Ryan is going to have to throw a ton and even if his (and those wideouts who I confess are pretty damn good) stats look great he's also going to throw 40 interceptions. Plus their defense sucks. Everyone is going to feel stupid at the end of the year when they suck except me because I'm right, and then you're going to acknowledge me as your god.
4. Percy Harvin is going to have a break out season. No, he's not going be like Dez Bryant or anything, but Harvin should finally break the 1,000 receiving yards barrier and probably hit 100 catches. You can see it coming if you're a Vikes fan who's been watching him for three years, but just to put some quantitativeness to the qualitativeness - from week 7 forward last year (which is when Christian Ponder) took over, Harvin touched the ball 100 times which was the most in the NFL. Second place was Wes Welkerbury with 76. Yeah, Ponder digs him some Percy. He does get more touches than most WR due to the lining up in the backfield he does, particularly once AP went down to injury but even prior to that he was averaging more than 3 rush attempts per game. Looking forward to this.
5. Antonio Gates will break TE records. I know everyone is all over Rob Gronkowski and Jimmy Graham as the world's greatest tight ends - and rightly so because they had the two best seasons by a TE ever last year - but don't forget about Antonio Gates, who is primed to have an even better season that either of those two did last year. You know Philip Rivers is going to throw for a whole bunch of yards just as sure as you know he's going to cry at least once this year, but who gets those yards? Vincent Jackson is gone (#2 in catches last year). Mike Tolbert (#3) is as well, and Vincent Brown (who was supposed to ascend to their new #1 WR) is out half the season with an injury. That leaves Malcom Floyd (please) and Gates as your two main targets, and Antonio is finally healthy again after two injury plagued seasons where he still managed to average 57/780/8. Before getting hurt he had the best 1.5 seasons of his career, and everything points to a career year for him - expect him to break 1,400 receiving yards, a new TE record.
6. Andrew Luck will be better than Robert Griffin III this year. Seems like 95% of opinions I've read on these two say Luck will have the better career but RG3 will be better this season. Well I think Luck's better in both cases. Nobody argues he's the more polished QB already, so the other two factors would be if Luck struggles to pick-up the offensive scheme and if RG3 had markedly better weapons surrounding him, but I don't see it in either case. Luck basically called his own plays at Stanford, a team run by a "cerebral" former QB type like Jim Harbaugh (and by cerebral I mean in comparison to blockheads like Brad Childress) so I don't think he's going to majorly struggle with any system he's asked to run. And as far as weapons, both Indy and the Skins are a mess at RB although I'd give the edge to the Colts based on at least having a clear idea of who is going to get the majority of the carries, and I'll take Reggie Wayne/Austin Collie over Santana Moss/Pierre Garcon every time. What am I missing? Clear advantage to Luck. Also garcon means boy.
7. The Chiefs are going to suck. I have no idea why it seems everyone is picking these guys to win the AFC East this year. None at all. They're horrid. The have three good offensive players and two play the same position and were both hurt all or most of last year (fun fact: Jamaal Charles' middle name is Rashaad - that's a lot of a's), and the other one is Dwayne Bowe who is likely to end up shooting himself in the leg or getting suspended after buying weed in Mexico. Matt Cassell might very well be the worst starting QB in the league, and the Chiefs have one of the worst pass defenses in the entire NFL going up against the pass happy Chargers (6th in passing yds last year) and Raiders (11th and should be even better) and a team that just upgraded from Tim Tebow to Peyton Manning. Speaking of which....
8. The Broncos will win their division. Yes, I'm on board the Peyton train. I kind of have to be since I drafted him like 15 years ago in our inaugural keeper league draft and have held him since, but I truly believe he can make a huge difference for Denver. Demaryius Thomas has all the skill to be a lead WR and Eric Decker has both the game and the smarts to become Peyton's #1 target or at least a 1b to Thomas's 1a. That offense should be good enough to put up some points, and that hyper aggressive defense (big on sacks and turnovers, low on actual stops) could turn for the better. I'd feel better if I had heard of anyone on their offensive line and if their running back was someone better than Willis McGahee, but I feel pretty safe putting my blind trust in Peyton Manning and Champ Bailey. Especially if this was 2003.
9. The Saints are going to the Super Bowl. Seems to me like everybody is ignoring the Saints, and I rarely hear them come up when postseason stuff is talked about. In fact I don't think anyone on ESPN picked them to make the Super Bowl, but you best believe they'll be there. They have the best QB on the planet (or #2 after Rodgers) who has a whole mess of weapons to throw too, and while most teams with three running backs have a mess on their hands they have three guys who would all start in many NFL situations. That offense is straight up sick. And you don't think that defense is going to be playing with a major chip on their shoulder? Don't forget if this team doesn't see Alex Smith miraculously morph into Joe Unitas they're probably in the Super Bowl last year (they would've beat the Giants, I promise). Now take that same basic team (oh no, Robert Meachem left!) and add a big ole steamy plate of gritty emotions? They'll be there. Other playoff teams: NY Giants, Packers, 49ers, Lions, Eagles, Broncos, Texans, Pats, Ravens, Steelers, and Chargers. And your champ.....
10. The Ravens will win the Super Bowl. That's right, I'm backing Joe Flacco. I think we've got a perfect storm here. A young QB coming into his own with an offense being revamped to take advantage of his talents and a WR (Torrey Smith) coming into his own right along with him. Maybe the best offensive weapon in the game (Ray Rice) and one of the best defensive players (Haloti Ngata). Veterans who can still play who know this might be their last shot (Ray Lewis, Ed Reed, Matt Birk, Anquan Boldin). And, similar to the Saints, you've got a team here who was very close to making the Super Bowl last year (if Lee Evans catches one more pass they're in) and has done very little tinkering. Terrell Suggs injury is a bit of an unfortunate wrinkle, but so is your face.
HONORABLE MENTION: Others who will be awesome - Eli Manning, Jay Cutler, LeSean McCoy, Chris Johnson, Matt Forte, Steven Jackson, Carson Palmer, Marshawn Lynch, Brandon Marshall, Hakeem Nicks, Marques Colston, Greg Olsen, David Wilson, Mark Ingram, and Brandon Pettigrew. Those will suck - Cam Newton, Mike Vick, Darren McFadden, Arian Foster, Frank Gore, Ahmad Bradshaw, every Lions RB, Jordy Nelson, Victor Cruz, Miles Austin, Steve Johnson, and Vernon Davis.
BOOK IT.
Saturday, December 20, 2008
Hey Nerds
I've had like eleventeen vodka & cranberries (with lime, thanks Bogart) and I'm feeling a bit saucy. Also the baby is asleep and Mrs. W is at some stupid party I didn't get to go to because we didn't have a baby sitter, so instead I've been getting ripped and watching sports. That's not too bad I guess.
- Watching the Ravens beat the Cowboys in a very big win for them. I think. I saw some standings earlier that implied this was a big game for both teams. I'm not going to look it up because I don't feel like it, but I'm pretty sure this is a big win. I'm also pretty sure T.O. is a closet homosexual. Come on, like you'd be surprised.
- Did you know The Todd was in Oakdale this afternoon, and I live across the street from Oakdale, and he didn't bother to call me to hang out? And he always says stuff like "we should hang out?" What a jerk-hole. No wonder he can't get with the ladies.
- So the Gophers, after that massively awesome win against L'Ville today, are one of only a few undefeated teams left in NCAA basketball, which is great. You know who else is undefeated? Pitt. Again. Like every god damned year. They do this crap every year, where they play nobody and get ranked highly by beating nobody. Oh goodie, you beat Texas Tech. So did freaking Lamar. Christ, they even have a recruiting questionnaire for prospective players like a community college. Most overrated program of all time. Have they even ever had a good pro other than Larry Fitzgerald? Even their "best" college players were overrated. Brandin Knight? Couldn't shoot. Made Jacque Vaughn look like Pete Maravich. Aaron Gray? Jeff Hagen with a good supporting cast. Charles Smith? Once missed three layups in a ten second span. Their only good player in history is Jerome Lane, who was apparently absolutely fantastic (2 time all-american first team, once second, once third team) but who I remember more for this:
- Jason Witten with a TD, which greatly helps my fantasy keeper team, in the championship and playing $nake who used to post his hockey thoughts here. I almost sent him a text with some kind of trash talkiness, but since I got knocked out of the playoffs with the world's greatest team by three-touchdown Monday night games by Joe Horn and Drew Bennett, and he has Greg Jennings, I think I'll just keep my mouth shut.
- So Dallas kicks it deep, down two with 1:36 remaining. I don't get it. Even with three time outs, it's so risky. One first down and the game is over. And instead LeRon McClain goes 82 yards for a TD, completely blowing my McClain under 68 yards bet which was actually looking ok up until this point. Gay.
- I just witnessed the Pac 10 all-time receptions record broken here at the Mienike Poulan Weedeater PapaJohns.com bowl by someone named Mike Thomas who I think played DT for the Vikings in the 90s. Be still my heart.
- You know what was a good movie? Boyz n the Hood. That was a pretty good movie.
- I love how Brett Favre is a pro-bowler by the way. Did you know he leads the league in interceptions? It's so predictable it almost seems unbelievable, doesn't it? So let's get this shit straight, Philly Rivers leads the AFC in QB Rating, TD passes, and yards per attempt, and is third in yards, but he's not on the pro-bowl roster? Good to know that the pro bowl is as retarded as the baseball all-star game.
- I'm now watching Who wants to be a Millionaire, and some lady needed help on identifying, "In the Pythagorean Theorem, A squared plus B squared equals what?" I think that's my cue to stop typing.
- Watching the Ravens beat the Cowboys in a very big win for them. I think. I saw some standings earlier that implied this was a big game for both teams. I'm not going to look it up because I don't feel like it, but I'm pretty sure this is a big win. I'm also pretty sure T.O. is a closet homosexual. Come on, like you'd be surprised.
- Did you know The Todd was in Oakdale this afternoon, and I live across the street from Oakdale, and he didn't bother to call me to hang out? And he always says stuff like "we should hang out?" What a jerk-hole. No wonder he can't get with the ladies.
- So the Gophers, after that massively awesome win against L'Ville today, are one of only a few undefeated teams left in NCAA basketball, which is great. You know who else is undefeated? Pitt. Again. Like every god damned year. They do this crap every year, where they play nobody and get ranked highly by beating nobody. Oh goodie, you beat Texas Tech. So did freaking Lamar. Christ, they even have a recruiting questionnaire for prospective players like a community college. Most overrated program of all time. Have they even ever had a good pro other than Larry Fitzgerald? Even their "best" college players were overrated. Brandin Knight? Couldn't shoot. Made Jacque Vaughn look like Pete Maravich. Aaron Gray? Jeff Hagen with a good supporting cast. Charles Smith? Once missed three layups in a ten second span. Their only good player in history is Jerome Lane, who was apparently absolutely fantastic (2 time all-american first team, once second, once third team) but who I remember more for this:
- Jason Witten with a TD, which greatly helps my fantasy keeper team, in the championship and playing $nake who used to post his hockey thoughts here. I almost sent him a text with some kind of trash talkiness, but since I got knocked out of the playoffs with the world's greatest team by three-touchdown Monday night games by Joe Horn and Drew Bennett, and he has Greg Jennings, I think I'll just keep my mouth shut.
- So Dallas kicks it deep, down two with 1:36 remaining. I don't get it. Even with three time outs, it's so risky. One first down and the game is over. And instead LeRon McClain goes 82 yards for a TD, completely blowing my McClain under 68 yards bet which was actually looking ok up until this point. Gay.
- I just witnessed the Pac 10 all-time receptions record broken here at the Mienike Poulan Weedeater PapaJohns.com bowl by someone named Mike Thomas who I think played DT for the Vikings in the 90s. Be still my heart.
- You know what was a good movie? Boyz n the Hood. That was a pretty good movie.
- I love how Brett Favre is a pro-bowler by the way. Did you know he leads the league in interceptions? It's so predictable it almost seems unbelievable, doesn't it? So let's get this shit straight, Philly Rivers leads the AFC in QB Rating, TD passes, and yards per attempt, and is third in yards, but he's not on the pro-bowl roster? Good to know that the pro bowl is as retarded as the baseball all-star game.
- I'm now watching Who wants to be a Millionaire, and some lady needed help on identifying, "In the Pythagorean Theorem, A squared plus B squared equals what?" I think that's my cue to stop typing.
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