Well the so called big week is upon us. David f’ing Beckham is coming to the Twin Cities!!! My first and only question is, "who gives two shits?" Only in America would people actually get excited and pay top dollar to come watch this twat play. There is one reason that "Becks" (nice pillow biting nickname) is playing in the United States, because the rest of the world, which actually cares about the sport, knows he is not the world class player Americans are led to believe he is. Great, he can hit a free kick as good as anyone in the world. That might come into play a couple times per game, the other 89 minutes of the game he is just another slightly above average player with lots of tattoos, a six pack of abs and a really bad hair cut. That would be like a Division 1 basketball program signing Small so he could shoot free throws, but minus the abs.
Beckham is also playing in America because we and our players suck at soccer. Beckham can come over here and actually dominate a game so people think he is good. This is evident by the fact that his team is touring the country playing teams like the Minnesota Thunder. For those of you who don’t know and most likely don’t care, the Thunder is MN’s so called professional team. They are also the same "professionals" that just went down to the Shattuck School and got beat by a bunch of 16-18 year olds as a tune up for this weekend. To put that into perspective, it would be like Winona State scheduling the gophers for all 28 games of their basketball schedule.
There are 3 types of people who will actually pay to watch this game over the weekend. 1) The guy who sits around and think it makes him sophisticated because he calls himself a soccer fan. You know the guy. He walks around in one of his 20 replica jerseys, uses British slang when he talks, drink Guiness or Bass, hangs out at Brits Pub and was most likely they guy who called soccer players fags in high school. 2) Teenage girls. 3) Typical dumb ass American’s who have been told by their TV sets that this guy is important. Either way the only people who will leave the game feeling like they got what they paid for are the teenage girls, because without a doubt Beckham will spend more time walking around with his jersey off then he will on. The first group of fans are idiots who inside will feel let down, but will still act excited because they want to keep up their charade as a "soccer fan". The 3rd group of people will be bored out of their minds and wonder to themselves why they just wasted all of that money and time to watch something they still don’t understand and hate.
Unless you are a 14 year old girl or a gay guy with a thing for British guys who have failed miserably trying to pull off the look of Brad Pitts character in Snatch you are a Laser for attending this game.
Also, what in the hell is with Beckhams meth addict looking wife??? It looks like Kurt Warner’s wife cut her hair.
P.S. W, Sorry about writing about non Holy Angels soccer on your blog. This has just been pissing me off!
[Snake: It looks like Pele and Yahoo are stealing your bits. - W]
Posts
